Anybody that works on their own cars needs to read this

[RDCanecutter 26476]

That brought back memories of a VW camper van I owned when I lived in the mountains. The kind of place where you'd live or die based on the emergency brake. My emergency brake went out, and rather than replace it, I carried a log. Yes, a log. I'd chock the wheel with that log to keep it from rolling if (when) it popped out of gear.

Went to get it inspected. No emergency brake? "I just use this log." Gas station dude gave me this long sad smile, shook his head.

Later that day I learned how to fix an emergency brake cable.

[tbone_ 14198]

battery in my wife's car died at her office.  between her, one of her millennial coworkers, and Google, they still couldn't figure out how to jump it.  I had to drive down 360 from Spicewood Springs Rd to BeeCaves Rd and back at 5pm to jump it for her to get home so Icould pull it and take it to Autozone after dinner to get it tested/replaced (didn't want to have to jump it again).
a few years before that, her battery died on us up in Dallas, while visiting her mother.  Autozone was a block away, so I just let them do it, not having any tools with me, etc.  felt like a millennial, standing there with my thumb up my ass (metaphorically speaking) while the kid replaced the battery in the parking lot.
 

AAA

[High Plains Drifter 11052]

 

I had to replace a bulb in my wife's Outback's (no lesbian) low beam headlight. To do this, I had to pull back the wheel well cover, and then reach my arm up in there and do everything by feel, one handed, while kneeling next to the front door. Unscrew the cap thing, unclip the old bulb, pull old bulb out of the socket thing, plug in new bulb, reclip, rescrew the cap. Looking down into the engine well from above, I could see what was where, but unless I was Stretch Armstrong, it was all by feel. Rescrewing the cap one handed without cross threading it was the cherry on the entire shit sundae. 

At one point, I had my daughter standing with two  mirrors where I could see my hand from above while kneeling next to the wheel well. But that was too hard due to trying to look at something upside down and backwards and shit.

Fucking engineer shitheads. Do they ever have to actually fix the shit they design?

 

[immortal13 4059]

1 hour ago, Brisketexan said:

Twenty-something years ago, something like that?   I'm getting old.  My takes on time are getting pretty loosey-goosey.  "Back in the day" would have been accurate as well.

Oh ok man. I was like "several" years damn, that's a reverse humble brag if I ever heard one. I have to admit I bought one of those pieces of shit back when they came out. I hated that mothefucker

 

[High Plains Drifter 11052]

27 minutes ago, RDCanecutter said:

That brought back memories of a VW camper van I owned when I lived in the mountains. The kind of place where you'd live or die based on the emergency brake. My emergency brake went out, and rather than replace it, I carried a log. Yes, a log. I'd chock the wheel with that log to keep it from rolling if (when) it popped out of gear.

Went to get it inspected. No emergency brake? "I just use this log." Gas station dude gave me this long sad smile, shook his head.

Later that day I learned how to fix an emergency brake cable.

 

Horn stopped working on the subaru. Wasn't the fuse, couldnt' figure out what was wrong, I didn't want to fuck with the horn switch which is up in there with the air bag, so I just installed a new horn (which plays the Eyes of Texas, btw). Anyway, when I went to get it inspected, guy told me that the horn didn't work. I showed him the button for the new horn. He said to pass, it had to be labelled as the horn. So I went into the garage office, borrowed a sticky note from the old lady that you give your ten bucks to for the inspection, write "horn" on it, and stuck it to the dash  next to the button. He passed me.

[kevwun 15936]

14 minutes ago, High Plains Drifter said:

 

Fucking engineer shitheads. Do they ever have to actually fix the shit they design?

 

It's like spark plugs that you can't get to without a special wrench.  They design things under the hood now to fit as tightly as possible.  As long as the components fit when they go in as one assembled unit when they drop in the engine, they don't give a shit about how easy they are to replace.

Edited September 3, 2020 by kevwun

[immortal13 4059]

55 minutes ago, High Plains Drifter said:

 

Horn stopped working on the subaru. Wasn't the fuse, couldnt' figure out what was wrong, I didn't want to fuck with the horn switch which is up in there with the air bag, so I just installed a new horn (which plays the Eyes of Texas, btw). Anyway, when I went to get it inspected, guy told me that the horn didn't work. I showed him the button for the new horn. He said to pass, it had to be labelled as the horn. So I went into the garage office, borrowed a sticky note from the old lady that you give your ten bucks to for the inspection, write "horn" on it, and stuck it to the dash  next to the button. He passed me.

I like your style

[B00M 6487]

I'll wrench on cars I care about (not the minivan) til the day I physically can't. Teenage years are when you pass these skills onto your kids so don't let them grow up to be useless pussies even if it's harder to work on than it was when you were a teen.

As long as it's remotely legal to modify cars, there will be tools and piggybacks and whatever else is required to work around bullshit OEM attempts to prevent it (or prevent basic diagnostics in the case of this thread).

[elfenix 34341]

On 9/3/2020 at 11:19 AM, Llano Estacado said:

I assume DMC is so small they may get exemptions to Clean Air Act and CAFE standards the big manufacturers wouldn’t. A man can dream.

ayup.

[TexPx 2325]

 
I had to replace a bulb in my wife's Outback's (no lesbian) low beam headlight. To do this, I had to pull back the wheel well cover, and then reach my arm up in there and do everything by feel, one handed, while kneeling next to the front door. Unscrew the cap thing, unclip the old bulb, pull old bulb out of the socket thing, plug in new bulb, reclip, rescrew the cap. Looking down into the engine well from above, I could see what was where, but unless I was Stretch Armstrong, it was all by feel. Rescrewing the cap one handed without cross threading it was the cherry on the entire shit sundae. 
At one point, I had my daughter standing with two  mirrors where I could see my hand from above while kneeling next to the wheel well. But that was too hard due to trying to look at something upside down and backwards and shit.
Fucking engineer shitheads. Do they ever have to actually fix the shit they design?
 

Crap. Guess I’ll trade my wife’s Outback in if a bulb goes out.


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[InkaUtexas 26183]

On 9/3/2020 at 3:25 PM, High Plains Drifter said:

 

Horn stopped working on the subaru. Wasn't the fuse, couldnt' figure out what was wrong, I didn't want to fuck with the horn switch which is up in there with the air bag, so I just installed a new horn (which plays the Eyes of Texas, btw). Anyway, when I went to get it inspected, guy told me that the horn didn't work. I showed him the button for the new horn. He said to pass, it had to be labelled as the horn. So I went into the garage office, borrowed a sticky note from the old lady that you give your ten bucks to for the inspection, write "horn" on it, and stuck it to the dash  next to the button. He passed me.

got the same set up in my jeep. Of course it is older than any of my kids but I sure do love that vehicle. 

[demos 3012]

My grandfather had a 72 GMC Sierra truck. That thing required a quart of oil before startup but you could’ve crawled in next to the engine when you opened the hood.

Went to change the battery my wife’s car and couldn’t fit a wrench in the there.

[Guest Lobo]

1 hour ago, demos said:

Went to change the battery my wife’s car and couldn’t fit a wrench in the there.

We talking about the car or her?  

[demos 3012]

She’s pretty tight.

 

There’s also not any fucking room to maneuver under the hood of her car.

[FORTY NINE TO ZERO 2652]

My prior car was A 2014 merc coupe. One of the headlights went out. Thankfully it was the left (maybe right?) one and was an easy do it do it yourself fix. If it had been the other one it would have been a 700 fix due to having to remove half front to replace. Sold it a year or so later for a top of the line 2018 f150.  Been in the shop 3 times already for warranty work and each time the dealership refused to give me a loaner.  Talk shit about expensive German repairs, but I miss that white glove service. Benz would pick the car up from my office for an oiL chance and get it back to me before lunch. 

Edited September 6, 2020 by Xian

[NeverMarryAStripper 21968]

29 minutes ago, Xian said:

Benz would pick the car up from my office for an oiL chance and get it back to me before lunch. 

Is that where they pick it up, drain the oil, roll the dice, and If it comes up snake eyes they don't put any back?

[RDCanecutter 26476]

6 hours ago, TexPx said:

Crap. Guess I’ll trade my wife’s Outback in if a bulb goes out.


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Maybe buy a very small car with working headlights, saw off the front foot or two off it, and mount it on the front bumper of the Outback like when Hannibal Lector wore that dead guard's face like a mask.

[TexPx 2325]

Maybe buy a very small car with working headlights, saw off the front foot or two off it, and mount it on the front bumper of the Outback like when Hannibal Lector wore that dead guard's face like a mask.

I have options...





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[Onboard 2.0 9083]

On 9/3/2020 at 4:05 PM, tbone_ said:

AAA

The best $100 I spend a year.  I've had my car towed a hundred miles on a couple occasions.

[RDCanecutter 26476]

1 hour ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

The best $100 I spend a year.  I've had my car towed a hundred miles on a couple occasions.

So, let's say in theory that I want to join AAA. Could I get a beater that I know has a blown engine, maybe slap a California plate on it, and then get it towed to my "home" in LA? And could I also ride along. I kinda have to ride along or else there's no point.

[Onboard 2.0 9083]

1 minute ago, RDCanecutter said:

So, let's say in theory that I want to join AAA. Could I get a beater that I know has a blown engine, maybe slap a California plate on it, and then get it towed to my "home" in LA? And could I also ride along. I kinda have to ride along or else there's no point.

Uhhh doubtful There's a fee after 125 miles...  and you only get so many tows a year that are free.  I actually like the ride along, you meet some colorful characters, some of them have weed occasionally (or so I've heard tell).

[crash_davis 23115]

the battle continues.

https://www.thedrive.com/news/35946/tesla-can-detect-aftermarket-hacks-designed-to-defeat-ev-performance-paywalls

The battle between automakers and aftermarket tuners is a war that has been waged for quite some time. While some manufacturers have embraced the movement, others are still fighting to protect their vehicles from being altered after they leave the factory, even going as far as encrypting vehicle ECUs to prevent tuners from fiddling with things. Electric vehicles have opened up a new front—manufacturers like Tesla can now create lower- and higher-performance versions of the exact same car using nothing but software.

Predictably, the aftermarket is working to defeat those pesky firewalls on the cheap to unlock a vehicle's full potential for everyone. Plugging in a dongle sounds simpler than wrenching, at least. But this new realm of modding comes with an equally new risk recently highlighted by a Tesla Model 3 owner on Reddit (as reported by Electrek)—that your connected car knows when you've hacked it, and it might be logging that data to use against you in a future warranty claim.

Edited September 9, 2020 by crash_davis

[tbone_ 14198]

Might be huh? Lol

[BBQ2Bayou 807]

On 9/2/2020 at 7:30 PM, Mother mopar said:

So have all the big tractor companies, this is why farmers are pissed over dumb software updates that the can not "update"

PS fuck them and OU sux

I'm gonna go completely off topic because I rarely see you post and I wanted to join in the fuck you part of this thread. Fuck the Mopar, cocksucking piece of fuck website.

That's all, and I have no idea your affiliation with them, but if you could pass it along, I'd appreciate it.

Sorry to disrupt.