Worst asshole next to you at a concert

[GhostOfTomJoad 9374]

Inspired by the Unpopular Opinions thread, who are the dickheads who've ruined your live music experiences?

 

There was the drunk out of his skull fuckhead at Jerryworld who spilled beer, hit people, & puked all over himself at the U2 Joshua Tree tour a few years ago. My wife was denied the opportunity to see the original tour in 87 by her mom so this was a chance for her to recapture that magic. Instead she spent half the concert trying to avoid beer, vomit & flailing arms. I was at the FEC show back then with $22 tickets. We spent close to a grand including hotel to have a shitty experience.

 

Then there was the drunk at a Patty Griffin show at Stubbs who decided he wasn't gonna wait in line so why not just unzip & piss where he was standing.

 

I've never understood the appeal of getting drunk or stoned before a show. I want to enjoy & remember the experience. And not waste the effort expended on getting tickets in the first place.

 

 

[Kermit 3159]

Talkers. I fucking hate talkers. 

[Sbbruin 21900]

The chick at this Reggae Sunsplash concert in the early 90’s at the Long Beach auditorium puked all over me.  Total bummer.  I still married her a few years later, so we can obviously survive anything.

[tbone_ 14204]

Don’t jinx it.

[Hate 20149]

@Druggistwas there for this one as well even if he doesn't remember it.  March 17, 1994 at the Rosemont Horizon in Chicago.  It's second day of a three day stop for the Grateful Dead.  I was there with two other friends.  We get to our seats and there is a pretty goofy guy sitting next to me and he has some fairly sophisticated recording equipment with him.  Now , we were nowhere near the stage nor were we in the tapers sections.  We were at about a 45 degree angle from the stage and in the mi-level upper deck.  So this guy next to me lets me know that he has just taken a hit of acid.  No big deal as there are a lot of people tripping at Grateful Dead shows.  The show starts and the guy is trying to record from his seat while me and my friends are all whooping it up and having a great time.  During intermission we start talking and he looks at me and says "A sphincter says what?" very quickly.  Well, I know this joke so I say back very loudly "HUH?".  He repeats his "joke" and I repeat my answer and this goes on another 3 or 4 times before I finally tell him I'm in on the joke.  The second set starts and after a couple of songs I see the guy is sitting down which is fairly rare at a Dead show.  He doesn't look so good so I ask him if he is ok.  He says he thinks he is about to hurl and I'm just thinking I don't want this dude hurling in my direction so I quickly grab his taping equipment and move it into my seat and tell him "if you're going to hurl, hurl that way" so he doesn't hurl on his recording equipment.  He nods in agreement and then just spews all over his friends feet on the other side.  He ended up passing out for the rest of the show and we all took turns leaving messages on his recording.  I'd love to hear those recordings some day. 

Edited September 3, 2020 by Hate

[OWLVIS 561]

the guy that yells Freebird at the top of his lungs

Edited September 3, 2020 by OWLVIS

[Underdog 28810]

9 hours ago, GhostOfTomJoad said:

 

Inspired by the Unpopular Opinions thread, who are the dickheads who've ruined your live music experiences?

 

There was the drunk out of his skull fuckhead at Jerryworld who spilled beer, hit people, & puked all over himself at the U2 Joshua Tree tour a few years ago. My wife was denied the opportunity to see the original tour in 87 by her mom so this was a chance for her to recapture that magic. Instead she spent half the concert trying to avoid beer, vomit & flailing arms. I was at the FEC show back then with $22 tickets. We spent close to a grand including hotel to have a shitty experience.

 

Then there was the drunk at a Patty Griffin show at Stubbs who decided he wasn't gonna wait in line so why not just unzip & piss where he was standing.

 

I've never understood the appeal of getting drunk or stoned before a show. I want to enjoy & remember the experience. And not waste the effort expended on getting tickets in the first place.

 

 

 

When the wife and I (me, myself, whatever) we went to a VH concert with some friends of hers from Del Valle, these 2 ol' boys decided to get plastered before and during the show and once proceeds to ralph it to the row of people in front of us.  IIRC, we put him in a bathroom stall for the remaining of the concert and ended up dragging his ass back to the car afterwards.  

 

9 hours ago, Kermit said:

Talkers. I fucking hate talkers. 

So fucking much this.  Had to ask a couple of numbnuts to knock it off during Joan Jett's opening set before The Who a few years back.  To their credit, they were apologetic and even apologized again when they left their seats.  

[Chad Fuck 17822]

11 hours ago, OWLVIS said:

the guy that yells Freebird at the top of his lungs

Sorry for partying.  

[Al_4_ISU 12509]

I've seen a lot of assholery at concerts, but generally haven't been right next to it, other than people trying to push their way through when they weren't up front to begin with, talking during the songs, and shit like that.

I've definitely seen multiple fights break out, and people get tossed at the band's direction.  I saw Mike Cooley throw a guy out of a Drive-By Trucker show in Minneapolis for flying a Confederate flag.  That was pretty sweet.

[Guest Lobo]

To be fair to that one guy at the Drive-By Trucker show...for some strange reason, the Coon Rapids area of Minneapolis has a lot of confederate flags.  I didn't realize the NW suburbs of the Twin Cities fought for the South, but when one of my sisters lived there for a few years---it was like the people of Vidor thought to themselves, "Let's find ourselves a winter retreat" 

I've been fortunate to not have too many assholes next to me at concerts/festivals which has been nice.  I tend to draw a shitty lot when it comes to sporting events.  But concerts have almost categorically been awesome.  Probably has to do with the kind of music I'm going to hear more than anything.   

[Hate 20149]

To be fair to that one guy at the Drive-By Trucker show...for some strange reason, the Coon Rapids area of Minneapolis has a lot of confederate flags.  I didn't realize the NW suburbs of the Twin Cities fought for the South, but when one of my sisters lived there for a few years---it was like the people of Vidor thought to themselves, "Let's find ourselves a winter retreat" 
I've been fortunate to not have too many assholes next to me at concerts/festivals which has been nice.  I tend to draw a shitty lot when it comes to sporting events.  But concerts have almost categorically been awesome.  Probably has to do with the kind of music I'm going to hear more than anything.   

As someone that has attended a couple of sporting events with you, I can confirm you sporting event bad luck.

[Guest Lobo]

Did we have some shitty experience together?  I'm old, I can't remember so good.  

[ChiTownDoc 21175]

It’s weird, I’ve always been around really cool people.  What’s up with that?

[Carl Spackler 3505]

1.  +1 on the "I hate talkers."  You want to talk?  Don't go to a fucking concert.  First time I saw Paul McCartney, a couple of dumbshits sitting immediately behind me thought it would be a good idea to gab incessantly during the first couple songs.  Finally told them to take it outside if they wanted to talk so much.  They didn't like that, but at least they STFU for the rest of the show.  

2.  Neil Young -- mostly acoustic set many, many years ago.  Big biker-looking dude sitting about 2-3 rows behind me was bellowing incoherently during many of the songs, which . . . uh . . . didn't really fit the vibe of the music.  But he was twice the size of everyone else in the vicinity, so nobody had the nerve to tell him to STFU.  Good thing he wasn't at the McCartney show.

3.  Pretenders -- SRO on the floor of the venue.  Some guy thought it would be a good idea to put his girlfriend on his shoulders so she could see better.  She was immediately subjected to a deluge of ice cubes, paper cups, and other readily-available missiles before they both got the message.  

4.  Replacements -- Same venue as Pretenders but many years later.  Drunk asshole decides he wants to get closer to the stage so he proceeds to start plowing forward without regard, which starts a free-for-all in that area of the floor.  My main focus was on shielding the girlfriend from flying haymakers, but I managed to get a shot in on said asshole after he got bounced in my direction.  Good times.

 

[Hate 20149]

Did we have some shitty experience together?  I'm old, I can't remember so good.  

I was suggesting that I was the asshole you were referencing.

[Guest Lobo]

Well yeah, that goes without saying.  I think we've had good luck at both music and sports when sitting together.  I was supposed to sit next to you at the Alamo Bowl one year, but my wife was in the ER.  Now that I've posted this, I'm sure when games/concerts open back up, I'll be stuck next to the talkative asshole who thinks this was all a hoax and wants to projectile spit during the whole time.  Of course, last time I took a hit off a joint was either with you at Dead & Co. or an Umphrey's McGee show that same year...and I coughed so much---I may have inadvertently started the pandemic.  

[Hate 20149]

That was a big fat hog leg too. /no homo

[Al_4_ISU 12509]

1 hour ago, Lobo said:

To be fair to that one guy at the Drive-By Trucker show...for some strange reason, the Coon Rapids area of Minneapolis has a lot of confederate flags.  I didn't realize the NW suburbs of the Twin Cities fought for the South, but when one of my sisters lived there for a few years---it was like the people of Vidor thought to themselves, "Let's find ourselves a winter retreat" 

I've been fortunate to not have too many assholes next to me at concerts/festivals which has been nice.  I tend to draw a shitty lot when it comes to sporting events.  But concerts have almost categorically been awesome.  Probably has to do with the kind of music I'm going to hear more than anything.   

I posited this in a different thread, but there's been a bizarre increase in Confederate flags in states that fought for the Union.  I think 75% of it is some meme for pissing off liberals, and the Twin Cities suburbs have a lot of pissed off right wing folks that feel the need to announce their presence to the Portlandia-ish liberal denizens of the cities proper.

[Guest Lobo]

Yeah, it's completely "virtue-signaling."   "I need err'body here to know I'm a fucking badass!  It's hard for me to take "gun toting outdoorsmen" that seriously when they're all headed to the Mall of America for sundries and lunch at Cheesecake Factory.  

Tying it back to concerts.  It was my second or third Dead show ever, still in high school.  And I saw some cool car sticker in the parking lot for sale and just had to have it.  Don't even remember what it was exactly, but some vertical version of the City of Chicago flag (blue stripes, red stars) placed into the steal your face skull.  Started affixing it to the back of my chick magnet Ford Escort coupe. My friend Danforth looked at me like a disapproving parent and said something to the effect of, "I know you want to tell the world you're a Deadhead, but all that sticker is gonna do is announce to cops and parents that you may have weed or beer in the car.  And since you most likely do, that's not a good idea."  He was right, I put the sticker on a trapper keeper or some shit and ever since then, I never put anything on my cars except maybe a Longhorn emblem of some kind. Virtue signaling, even if it's just a band you love that's associated with 'questionable' behavior is never a good idea on your motor vehicle.  

Which reminds me of the last full Grateful Dead show I ever saw, Tampa in 1995.  Few months before Jerry died when I was going to school out there.  Had a great time and two guys I went with John Henry and Westley from Stetson University.   They both had a great idea as two backwards ass southerners that think Florida is the center of the universe.  But both really great guys and smart as hell, still keep in touch with Wes.  John was wearing one of those cliche redneck shirts that had a confederate skeleton coming out of a tomb that said, "And the South Shall Rise Again."  Nothing new there, we've all seen 'em.  But he and Wes, fucked up out of their minds during Space/Dark Start...came up with a great idea.  A shirt of the Skull & Roses instead...and with some magnolia flowers from the south...but with the caption, "And the Dead Shall Rise Again."  We all thought it was a great idea, they even sketched it out on the car ride home, but we sobered up, and Jerry died.  /csb

I try to make up for being the guy who takes one hit off a joint every few years at a show and coughs incessantly due to some lung issues...so I'm the guy who brings back four beers to the seats instead of the legally mandated two.  Although with Hate last time, we also hit some kind of e-vapor deal outside right before the show with some other fans in front of us.  And it was so much smoother, I remember thinking "Ahhhh.........digital high for an analog asshole.  Nice."  ONe thing I loved about the Dead, we all did...was the parking lot before the concerts.  You'd have to try real fucking hard to find the asshole in those places.  Whereas the asshole finds you at almost every other concert.  But as a sign of the times and getting older, Hate and I had this big ole' plan to tailgate for hours before the show at the Erwin Center.  Instead, I we hung out with the wives and kids all day, I had an emergency meeting with my team from work for a few hours, and our Uber was late.  I think we had all of 30 minutes to hang out before heading into the show.  But hey, that's what we get for getting old.  Everybody around us was cool as hell though.  I think that may have been the only time I got high on UT property in my whole life.  /csb

[stc 1466]

stevie wonder at acl festival. guy next to me starts talking to me unsolicited and won't shut up. practically begs for a hit off the joint, finally give him one and he immediately pukes on my backpack. 

[Cheeseweasel 26438]

Saw The Eagles at Sam Boyd Stadium (Las Vegas) in 1994. Some chick was drunk as fuck and "accidentally" discharged her mace in our section. 

[jimmyjazz 46302]

I was watching a local band at Liberty Lunch, and as often happened, a mosh pit broke out.  This was not a punk band.  It was The Reivers.  Basically, a bunch of dumbasses thought it would be funny to mosh to a pop band.

I was standing on the perimeter of the pit, pretty much where I usually did when such things happened, because I could usually anticipate when some jackass was about to go careening into the crowd and likely take out an unsuspecting civilian.  Well, as luck would have it, just as a very very large guy -- like 6' 6" (I'm a foot shorter) -- moved in close to my 2 o'clock, one of the jackasses launched out of the pit, and this guy tries to catch him.  Problem was, I had just raised my bottle of beer to my lips to take a swig.  Giant Guy's elbow swung back, and jammed that bottle straight into my teeth, breaking off half my front left tooth and covering me with glass.

After I realized what had happened and brushed off all the shards, I tapped the guy on the back and said "hey, look at my tooth".  I mean, it wasn't his fault, but it was still kinda disconcerting.

He reached out and picked my up by the fucking lapels of a leather jacket I was wearing -- no doubt he had 125 pounds on me -- and there I was, swinging like a cartoon chicken in the wind.  Drunkenness took over, I tried to hit him, failed to accomplish that, and so I pointed to my tooth again and screamed "LOOK AT MY FUCKING TOOTH".

Again, it wasn't really his fault, and he turned out to be a good dude, but for a moment he was an asshole because he could pick me off the ground in a manner by which I couldn't actually connect with his face and so, well, that's embarrassing.

The enb.

[GhostOfTomJoad 9374]

I read "the enb" with the type of lisp a guy with a busted set of chicklets would use.

[jimmyjazz 46302]

4 minutes ago, GhostOfTomJoad said:

I read "the enb" with the type of lisp a guy with a busted set of chicklets would use.

That's a tip o' the cap to famous internet personality m13k.

[Bookman 4644]

I was second row at a Death Cab concert last year, and this short guy, who was right next to my right ear, sang practically every song as loud as he could right in my ear.

Fucker knew all the words too.

[Deej 76983]

49 minutes ago, Bookman said:

I was second row at a Death Cab concert last year, and this short guy, who was right next to my right ear, sang practically every song as loud as he could right in my ear.

Fucker knew all the words too.

Y'all hook up afterwards?

[Buzzrock 14953]

Talker for sure. I got to see Foals at a small venue on Halloween a few years ago, and this bro a few feet away was loudly talking this poor girl’s ear off. Finally I yelled at him, “Dude there is NO WAY she wants to hear you talk that much! Shut the fuck up!” He got huffy and took her to another part of the venue, I assume so he could keep blathering on.

[Underdog 28810]

13 hours ago, Bookman said:

I was second row at a Death Cab concert last year, and this short guy, who was right next to my right ear, sang practically every song as loud as he could right in my ear.

Fucker knew all the words too.

It's basically karaoke night for any of the old farts tours, which is kind of cool in its own way. 

[usmc0331horn 967]

Phone guy/girl recording entire songs the entire time. First, no one wants to see/listen to your shitty recording. Second. put the fucking phone down and actually enjoy the show. God I hate it. Plus, with literally everyone's arms up with their phones it's sometimes hard af to see either.

Edited September 4, 2020 by usmc0331horn

[Sbbruin 21900]

1 hour ago, Underdog said:

It's basically karaoke night for any of the old farts tours, which is kind of cool in its own way. 

Guilty as charged.

[oSuJeff97 3435]

1 hour ago, usmc0331horn said:

Phone guy/girl recording entire songs the entire time. First, no one wants to see/listen to your shitty recording. Second. put the fucking phone down and actually enjoy the show. God I hate it. Plus, with literally everyone's arms up with their phones it's sometimes hard af to see either.

Fucking this.  My biggest pet peeve.  I get taking a quick photo or two...but these fuckers who sit there and record entire songs.... I mean seriously?  You're never going to watch that, and TRUST ME... your friends or family don't want to watch your shitty dark/shaky recording of whatever song.

[jimmyjazz 46302]

I've posted it before, and won't dig it up again, but go find the cell phone footage of FUCKING ROBERT PLANT playing at the Continental Club.

I mean, it's FUCKING ROBERT PLANT.  Phones in the air, people talking right over him, the whole show.  Nauseating.

[Guest Lobo]

^

Imagine if Peter Grant had been alive to see that.  First, due to the potential for bootlegging, second for the disrespect to Robert Plant---Grant would have grabbed the phone out of the person's hand...cracked it in half with one hand and used one half the beat the life out of the person, then used the other half to film himself face-fucking the limp body. Then invited everyone else to stick around for an encore of "In the Light."  

[Chad Fuck 17822]

1 hour ago, usmc0331horn said:

Phone guy/girl recording entire songs the entire time. First, no one wants to see/listen to your shitty recording. Second. put the fucking phone down and actually enjoy the show. God I hate it. Plus, with literally everyone's arms up with their phones it's sometimes hard af to see either.

100%.  Quit worrying about documenting.  Enjoy the moment.

[Underdog 28810]

1 hour ago, Sbbruin said:

Guilty as charged.

Same. And I have a beautiful shower voice. 

[strangulation! 1716]

19 minutes ago, Underdog said:

Same. And I have a beautiful shower voice. 

agreed.

[sidis 9832]

the fact that @4th&Five has not posted 98% of the content of this thread absolutely boggles the mind...

[zlavydra 2123]

Only go to metal shows, and I've never had a problem with anyone. No talkers, no pukers, very few fights.

[Butch Had Not 2995]

Really tall guy with zero self awareness while moving around on the floor and plants himself directly in front of me and my tiny window to view the band. 

[Whitewater Horn 968]

I’ve been mostly lucky at shows, but have had a full beer spilled down my back at a Rush show in Dallas and my nose busted by some idiot running through the crowd at a Faith No More show in London. Me and a buddy lost our dates at a Ministry show in Dallas when their trim coordinator asked them if they wanted to go backstage. They turned up three days later with the kind of tale one would expect from spending a few days with Ministry. 
 

One incident that stands out didn’t happen next to me, but it was something me and my friends watched from a distance. It was a Dead show on Halloween night in London. The crowd was mostly expats and American Deadheads who had followed them on their European dates that year (1990).  After the last song, a cover of “Werewolves of London,” we saw a pack local shitheads running around the arena pickpocketing the stoned, tripping, or otherwise unaware Deadheads. We were on the floor looking up at this happening in the lower bowl and trying to yell, but no one could hear us. Fucking assholes.

[Sawbonz 27669]

On 9/3/2020 at 12:12 PM, ChiTownDoc said:

It’s weird, I’ve always been around really cool people.  What’s up with that?

If you can’t spot the asshole at the concert...

[ChiTownDoc 21175]

8 hours ago, Sawbonz said:

If you can’t spot the asshole at the concert...

Your meter was definitely malfunctioning there.  Or you’re spelling out the obvious.  But yes, this guy has probably been annoying.  

[Eljefeweizen 34]

Talkers, singers, and documentarians. Specific example: The EXTREMELY drunk couple at the Chris Cornell solo (acoustic) show at the Paramount a few years back. They insisted on (drunkenly) singing every single song at the top of their drunk asses AFTER he requested audience silence. APD finally hauled them off.

[hot ham water 51]

I distinctly remember @Continental Op melting some dude's acrylic sweater with a lung dart after he jumped in front of us at this show.

[Continental Op 3934]

1 hour ago, hot ham water said:

I distinctly remember @Continental Op melting some dude's acrylic sweater with a lung dart after he jumped in front of us at this show.

That was the one where Grandaddy opened, right?  I'd pay a ton of money to go back in time and see that. 

[hot ham water 51]

1 hour ago, Continental Op said:

That was the one where Grandaddy opened, right?  I'd pay a ton of money to go back in time and see that. 

Yessir. Yes it was.

[Continental Op 3934]

But yeah to get this back on track, wannabe documentarians are the worst.  I didn't pay to watch the show through your phone asshole.  Just watch the goddamn show. 

[Chad Fuck 17822]

20 hours ago, Eljefeweizen said:

Talkers, singers, and documentarians. Specific example: The EXTREMELY drunk couple at the Chris Cornell solo (acoustic) show at the Paramount a few years back. They insisted on (drunkenly) singing every single song at the top of their drunk asses AFTER he requested audience silence. APD finally hauled them off.

This happened at a Jeff Tweedy solo show at the Majestic in Dallas.  /csb

[Classic Rock 280]

A year ago in Vegas for George Strait. Our seats were 4th row, upper arena. Great view of the stage, plus his stage is round, so you are never really in a bad spot. Before warm up act comes on, a couple about 50'ish and their college age daughter and probably boyfriend sit behind us, each 2 fisting 24 ounce Bud Lites. Loud as hell, hear them say they are from Lubbock, "George Strait  woooooooo" every 2 minutes. Opening act starts, all 4 stand up aggy style. Not a single person in the whole upper arena standing up but them. Now they are spilling beer, kicking chairs and start getting into it with the people behind them. Security called, they sit down. They threaten the couple behind them. They stand back up again, security called again. All 4 eventually thrown out and never even get to see George play. Never could understand it paying all that money to act a complete asshole.

 

You can take some people out of Lubbock, but you can't take the Lubbock out of some people.

[stc 1466]

in the case of george strait, sitting is appropriate. however i always get a kick out of the uptight assholes who complain about the people standing up and dancing in front of them. they paid for a seat just like everyone else, they can enjoy the concert however they see fit. sitting through a rock show is bullshit.