Worst asshole next to you at a concert

[noharleyyet 2852]

Raylan Givens..."sump'n sump'n, it's you."

[Willfully Horn 8054]

Tough question. Go with t”shut up and dance?” Oblivion level intoxication? 

I’m going with whichever one of you assholes it was repeatedly crop-dusting  eau d’Hell up front at the Turnpike Troubadours ACL taping.

Edited September 17, 2020 by Willfully Horn
Civility

[Moby Ric 2058]

On 9/9/2020 at 2:43 PM, stc said:

in the case of george strait, sitting is appropriate. however i always get a kick out of the uptight assholes who complain about the people standing up and dancing in front of them. they paid for a seat just like everyone else, they can enjoy the concert however they see fit. sitting through a rock show is bullshit. 

I had a guy behind me at a Van Halen show tap me on the shoulder and just points to me to sit.  About 20th row center stage at the Woodlands.  Everyone was standing, I ignored him.  I get a cup to the back thrown at me later.  I picked up a beer can in front of me and Nolan Ryan it right in his face.  Was not bothered again.  Dude was not there at the end of the show, so I guess he left.  Who the fuck sits at a Van Halen show?!

[honolulu horn 6165]

My then-girlfriend-now-wife just about threw down with another woman at a Public Enemy show at the Backroom. Damn, that sentence dates the hell out of me. Anyway, the other woman was super drunk and belligerent and kept bumping into my girlfriend. Eventually the girlfriend shoved her to the floor and told her to fucking back off. Chuck D gave her the head nod. It was cool.

I was at GWAR show when some teen kept yelling that my shirt was too offensive. I think she must have been high for the first time or something. It made no sense. I mean, I was wearing a Dwarves "Teach Children to Worship Satan" t-shirt, but getting offended by the crowd at a fucking GWAR show is ridiculous. The 3 foot monster cock shooting green jizz into the crowd didn't offend you, but my shirt did? Get the fuck outta here. 

[DallasHorn26 586]

When I was a kid, I saw a drunk accidently light this woman's hair on fire with a lighter at Garth Brooks show at Texas stadium in 95. 

[jimmyjazz 46225]

Any of you ever see someone come off the stage to take on a drunk in the crowd?  I can't remember what band it was -- maybe Supersuckers? -- but I saw the most awesome fight at Liberty Lunch with that basic setup.  Absolutely nobody cared to stop the drunk shitbag from getting his ass beat.

[GhostOfTomJoad 9358]

Never saw something that awesome, but I did see Lyle Lovett at the original Backyard rip into a bunch of dope smokers at a show in the late '90s. There was a big rain after Lisa Loeb opened, and he came out & did a solo acoustic set for about an hour (they did a full Big Band show about a week later as a make up), and he was in a bit of a mood. We had 3rd row stage seats & a lot of people evacuated when the rains came. There was a group a few seats down smoking wonder joints when he started back up. The stank was hitting him on the stage, & he stopped during a song intro to rant about how he wished that the people who had to smoke grass would learn to bake it into brownies or food so the people next to them didn't have to deal with it. 

[Hate 20146]

Never saw something that awesome, but I did see Lyle Lovett at the original Backyard rip into a bunch of dope smokers at a show in the late '90s. There was a big rain after Lisa Loeb opened, and he came out & did a solo acoustic set for about an hour (they did a full Big Band show about a week later as a make up), and he was in a bit of a mood. We had 3rd row stage seats & a lot of people evacuated when the rains came. There was a group a few seats down smoking wonder joints when he started back up. The stank was hitting him on the stage, & he stopped during a song intro to rant about how he wished that the people who had to smoke grass would learn to bake it into brownies or food so the people next to them didn't have to deal with it. 

That’s a pretty good story. Lyle Lovett and his big band are fucking great live! I saw them once at the Majestic in SA and it’s still one of my favorite shows I’ve ever seen.

[MissingInAction 25204]

Being 6'3", I am always the asshole in front of you at a concert.

[BoomMF 1399]

The title immediately make me think of the goober in this video (6:44 mark). What a fucking nightmare.

 

[PencilPusher 454]

Had 2nd row center seats to a Van Hagar show at the FEC in the early 90's....can't remember which tour. The assholes behind us from the time the lights went down until the end of the encore could not stop shouting. "You're a God Eddie!"..."Eddie you're a God"..."You Rock Eddie"...ad nauseum.

Can't really say this was assholish because the guy that did this was blitzed out of his mind, but was at a Widespread Panic show in NO in 1997 at UNO Lakefront Arena...Halloween weekend-Galactic opened. Of course the crowd was tailgating plenty before the show and we were all in costume given it was Halloween weekend. Group behind us piles in after the Galactic opener and the disheveled chunky guy at the end of the row slumps down in his chair and passes out. Sometime during the middle of Widespread's set, the specific song that was playing brought this guy back to life...so much so that he suddenly rises from his chair, turns around, unzips his pants, and begins to piss on his seat. He proceeds to zip up, turn back around, and recollapse back on his chair, oblivious to the sudden panic of our ladyfriends scrambling to avoid the wide and deep yellow river now moving swiftly down the rows of the UNO arena. When the show ended, the guy was still passed out despite the entire auditorium leaving around him and for all I know, he's still there today waiting for the right song to move him to begin relieving himself yet again. 

 

[WhatTheBuck 28806]

On September 2, 2020 at 11:36 PM, OWLVIS said:

the guy that yells Freebird at the top of his lungs

In jest I once shouted "Freebird!" at an Adrian Belew solo gig. He gave me the finger and said, "I got yer free bird right here." I thought that was awesome. 

Also, I had a guy sitting next to me at a Pink Floyd show once who complained when my friends and I smoked a joint. I just laughed and said, "I defy you to find any other seat in the stadium where the people next to you aren't smoking pot." 

[WhatTheBuck 28806]

On September 9, 2020 at 3:43 PM, stc said:

in the case of george strait, sitting is appropriate. however i always get a kick out of the uptight assholes who complain about the people standing up and dancing in front of them. they paid for a seat just like everyone else, they can enjoy the concert however they see fit. sitting through a rock show is bullshit. 

Don't ever attend a King Crimson show. 

[WhatTheBuck 28806]

On September 17, 2020 at 9:16 AM, Moby Ric said:

 Who the fuck sits at a Van Halen show?!

Alex. 

[hullabelew 3724]

@baboso to the white courtesy phone please.  Music Midtown/Ga Tech baseball players story.  

Mine was probably another Music Midtown event.  Deadhead wanna-bes were getting there early for a Leftover Salmon set but I was there to see Peter Case who was about to start.  Wife, 6 yr old daughter and I are sitting on our blanket and they start sitting on it, then spreading their shit out, all over our blanket, even moving our stuff off.   After several attempts to be nice, I finally fucking lost it.  

Me:  "Dudes.  You mind getting your shit and your asses off my blanket?" 
Fuckheads:  "Hey man....we're all here to share what we all have man.....nothing belongs to anyone.....it's all ours." 
Me:  "Well, I'm about to start kicking OUR collective asses."
One of the hairy hippie chicks:  "Bummer man.  Some people shouldn't be allowed to be parents"
Me:  "Agreed.  And I hope for fuck's sake you either don't breed to any of these other stale patchouli-smelling, dirt-weed fucks...or that your Chlamydia makes your sterile"
By then a crowd had gathered and security and the cops drug them away.

 

 

Edited September 28, 2020 by hullabelew

[tbone_ 14181]

Outstanding.