It’s just a job really, something to keep me moving. My real passion is my hobby.

[bschoolprof 6,273]

Really, what’s that?

 

 

I work with retards. 

[BigDHornfan 6,560]

Have you seen my baseball?

[Knoxtnhorn 6,067]

You ever heard of mail order brides?  Well, they go that way too.

[Knoxtnhorn 6,067]

Did you build the Estadio Olimpico?

Pat Healy : No, just down the street the Celinto Catayente Towers.

A standalone Pat Healy movie could have been great.

[TexArcher 38,081]

42 minutes ago, bschoolprof said:

Really, what’s that?

 

 

I work with retards. 

Isn't that a little politically incorrect?

Well, to hell with that.  No one's gonna tell me who I can and can't work with, right?

[TrashMaster G 17,652]

Franks and beans!

[bschoolprof 6,273]

Step in to my office, cause you're fuckin fired.  

[GreenspointTexas 9,689]

Its more of an enclosure

[Underdog 28,808]

Used to hate Dillon but he's done great work in several good movies. 

[oSuJeff97 3,435]

You know... highway rest areas are homosexual hangouts.... they're the bathhouses of the 90s for many, many, many gay men...

[Underdog 28,808]

We got a bleeder! 

[Parliament 14,352]

I'm here to play the Dolphins, you dumbass.

[bschoolprof 6,273]

This clip slays me

 

[Knoxtnhorn 6,067]

All I got are these Nepalese coins.

[4th&Five 41,607]

Have you ever had a whitehead on your eyeball?

[Guest Lobo]

I had to look it up, didn't realize that movie is already 22 years old.  I don't know I thought it came out in the early 2000's.  

Three unpopular opinions about this movie that this thread confirms for me are correct---although it was her "breakout" role, Cameron Diaz actually wasn't that funny in this movie.  And Matt Dillon was the funniest person in this movie, by far.  Third-the hottest woman in this movie was not Cameron Diaz or any of her young friends.  It was the Milf-tastic Markie Post.  

[Angry Gorilla 1,769]

5 hours ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

You ever heard of mail order brides?  Well, they go that way too.

You can't forget, it's a sumo culture, Ted. They pay by the pound over there. Sorta like, um, tuna.

[Deej 76,983]

The last time I had a paper smear, the poor guy needed leather gloves and an oyster shucker.

[4th&Five 41,607]

9 minutes ago, Lobo said:

I had to look it up, didn't realize that movie is already 22 years old.  I don't know I thought it came out in the early 2000's.  

Three unpopular opinions about this movie that this thread confirms for me are correct---although it was her "breakout" role, Cameron Diaz actually wasn't that funny in this movie.  And Matt Dillon was the funniest person in this movie, by far.  Third-the hottest woman in this movie was not Cameron Diaz or any of her young friends.  It was the Milf-tastic Markie Post.  

i saw it in the theater the day before i moved into my first dorm room.

[futureman 22,559]

3 hours ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

All I got are these Nepalese coins.

you’ve been to Nepal?

[yoladu 4,111]

Come on, Puffer! Stay away from the light!!

[4th&Five 41,607]

Just now, futureman said:

you’ve been to Nepal?

not in months.  i don't know why i even bought the damn place.

[futureman 22,559]

got this one kid, Mongo... he’s got a forehead like a drive-in movie theater. 

[ztejas 43,556]

2 hours ago, Lobo said:

I had to look it up, didn't realize that movie is already 22 years old.  I don't know I thought it came out in the early 2000's.  

Three unpopular opinions about this movie that this thread confirms for me are correct---although it was her "breakout" role, Cameron Diaz actually wasn't that funny in this movie.  And Matt Dillon was the funniest person in this movie, by far.  Third-the hottest woman in this movie was not Cameron Diaz or any of her young friends.  It was the Milf-tastic Markie Post.  

Diaz has never really done it for me. She has the bad facial qualities of post-work Jolie.

Edited October 1, 2020 by ztejas

[bschoolprof 6,273]

He never even looked her up down there! He was down there closing his deal with the Rice-a-Roni people the whole time!

[RamjetFDO 10,578]

7 hours ago, TrashMaster G said:

Franks and beans!

 

How'd you get the beans above the frank?

[Underdog 28,808]

I was just boning you to get to her. 

[DougO 5,257]

Holy shit...I've been going out with a loaded gun!

[RamjetFDO 10,578]

Just now, DougO said:

Holy shit...I've been going out with a loaded gun!

 

Is that... hair gel?

[futureman 22,559]

2 hours ago, ztejas said:

Diaz has never really done it for me.

clearly you never saw the mask. 

[miguelito 11,332]

[futureman 22,559]

who, rollerpig??

[Wade 464]

One my favorite subtle bits in this movie was Healy ordering a whiskey from Pops and getting a Budweiser.

[Knoxtnhorn 6,067]

8 minutes ago, Wade said:

One my favorite subtle bits in this movie was Healy ordering a whiskey from Pops and getting a Budweiser.

Ha!  I noticed that for the first time during my last viewing... of many.

[Upgrayedd 5,822]

[South Austin 52,639]

Listen to this:  Seven . . . minute . . . abs.

[Not a cat 5,726]

Day before the bar exam, I said "fuck it, I'm done studying" and went to see this by myself.  Don't know if it was the movie or the fact I was delirious, but I literally was sweating from laughing so much.

[futureman 22,559]

On 10/1/2020 at 8:46 PM, Not a cat said:

Day before the bar exam, I said "fuck it, I'm done studying" and went to see this by myself.  Don't know if it was the movie or the fact I was delirious, but I literally was sweating from laughing so much.

so what line of work did you end up in?

[Not a cat 5,726]

Tow truck driving.  Set my own hours, stay physically active, meet interesting young people.  

[Ignatius 4,042]

“How’s married life treating you?”

”Ah, you know...every day’s better than the next”

Edited October 3, 2020 by Ignatius

[futureman 22,559]

2 minutes ago, Ignatius said:

“How’s married life treating you?”

”Ah, you know...every day’s better than the next”

fucking hilarious.  I had never noticed that line.  

[Deej 76,983]

“Here, you’ve been in therapy, you know, thinking you blew it with the greatest girl ever, and really, it turns out that getting your dick stuck in your zipper was the best thing that ever happened to you.”

Edited October 4, 2020 by Deej

[RexWilson 1,348]

I'm fucking with you Ted

I've used that line a lot over the years.

Or anytime I am asked if I have been to a particular city: "twice last year"

 

[futureman 22,559]

1 hour ago, RexWilson said:

Or anytime I am asked if I have been to a particular city: "twice last year"

who’s been to santiago, chile twice in one year??

[RamjetFDO 10,578]

who’s been to santiago, chile twice in one year??

Well... When you're responsible for the Celinto Catayente... Towers... You might have to be there.

[CooterBrown 18,034]

One my favorite subtle bits in this movie was Healy ordering a whiskey from Pops and getting a Budweiser.

My favorite is when Ben comments that Chris Elliott’s life is so great with his wife and kids and he replies “everyday is better than the next.”

 

Fuck. I see someone already commented on it.