Halloween bullshit

[RamjetFDO 10575]

On 9/19/2023 at 3:28 PM, Prepuce of Doom said:

Very low expectations for this year's (well, last year's) new monster. 

As previously reported, someone or something has eaten much of its ass, and not in the good way. There's a real Frank Beamer quality to it now, at least as far as I can tell without disturbing it. 

It kept tipping over and I eventually gave up on propping it up, and I have little faith that it will stand upright very easily or for very long once I extract it from the bushes. 

But who knows - maybe we'll be pleasantly surprised in a couple of weeks. And the previous two have fared well by spending the offseason in my garage. 

 

[Prepuce of Doom 21073]

1 hour ago, RamjetFDO said:

 

Weekend got away from me. Will get the dudes out of the garage next weekend. Got two warty types this weekend, but I don't think that they're of the "permanent, tough rind" species. 

[CooterBrown 18012]

Add a McSweeney's to this and you got me everytime:

I would put our candy bowl out in a bear trap but I’m too cheap to buy a bear trap and too lazy to mock one up. Actually, I won’t even put out candy. Fuck them kids.

[Mitch Cumsteen 18549]

I put out a bunch of our Halloween shit yesterday. About 2-3 hours worth of work. Anyone want to take a guess on how many of those Home Depot bins of Halloween shit I own? Anyone, anyone, Buehler?

I'll help you out. 12. Twelve fucking bins of shit that hangs in the trees, electronic shit that doesn't work anymore, lights, bats, ghosts, skeletons, ghouls, serving dishes, decorative towels, a strobe light, smoke machine, enough of those horrible stringy cobwebs (that are impossible to get out of your trees) to make a fucking parachute, fake pumpkins, stuffed crows, spiders, candy corn lights, lights that make your house look like it's on fire, a projector that makes it look like there are zombies dancing in your house, shit that starts screaming at you when you walk up to the door, tombstones, a Medusa head with moving snake hair that talks shit to you and is placed over the shitter, a ghost on a string that flies across the yard while moaning like an 80 year old man who can't get out of his recliner, fake pumpkins, and on and on and on and on....

[gofuckyourself 8240]

We may be the anti-Cumsteens.

I put three small gourds outside. Three inside. And two small black cobweb votive candles on the kitchen island.

Boo. Humbug.

But I'll probably do more because I do like Halloween. Maybe put out some Phillips Hue lights on the porch or something. Buckets of blood poised over the door, whatever.

[Mitch Cumsteen 18549]

I located five (FIVE!!?!?!) more storage bins of Halloween shit yesterday. So that's 17 total bins for those of you keeping score at home. I brought all of them the house and put them in the entry way to make it very uncomfortable to navigate around the maze and stacks of them. All of this was a pre-emptive strike to remind my wife of just how much Halloween shit she has and prevent her from buying more. I don't think it's going to work.

[thunderlounge 7834]

40 minutes ago, Mitch Cumsteen said:

I don't think it's going to work.

Doesn’t work for mine. Granted she’s more Christmas overboard than the others.

Which means only 5 or 6 bins vice the 30 or so for Christmas. Those tubs turn our place into Santa’s Village of the Damned.

[TrashMaster G 17557]

I only get inside decorations for Halloween. I figure if I put Halloween decorations outside, that will only encourage little shits to ring my doorbell Halloween night. 

Not interested. 

Now, if I could only have hot, slutty young (legal) ladies ring my doorbell, I'd be all for it.

[NWBuck 8567]

13 hours ago, Mitch Cumsteen said:

I located five (FIVE!!?!?!) more storage bins of Halloween shit yesterday. So that's 17 total bins for those of you keeping score at home. I brought all of them the house and put them in the entry way to make it very uncomfortable to navigate around the maze and stacks of them. All of this was a pre-emptive strike to remind my wife of just how much Halloween shit she has and prevent her from buying more. I don't think it's going to work.

Some people just cut a maze out in a field of corn, but brother... I like your style.

56 minutes ago, TrashMaster G said:

I only get inside decorations for Halloween.

Same. Well, it's what I do now, after 'the Nativity Scene incident'.

[Longboard Horn 40325]

[Don Johnson 4753]

 

[Sandman 3403]

On 10/10/2023 at 11:24 AM, Mitch Cumsteen said:

All of this was a pre-emptive strike to remind my wife of just how much Halloween shit she has and prevent her from buying more. I don't think it's going to work.

It's just going to let her know which stuff she doesn't have yet. And another trip to Target will commence. 

[Incredulity 11674]

35 minutes ago, Sandman said:

It's just going to let her know which stuff she doesn't have yet. And another trip to Target will commence. 

This,

i can relate to this.

[nnm 36405]

18 hours ago, TrashMaster G said:

Now, if I could only have hot, slutty young (legal) ladies ring my doorbell, I'd be all for it.

Sugar baby thread is that way —->

[Longboard Horn 40325]

[Prepuce of Doom 21073]

Finally dug Trey out of his crypt. Pretty haggard looking, but I think he's at least going to make it through the season, but it's TBD whether he'll live forever like Sr. and Jr. 

A front and rear shot, followed by a couple shots of the the current state of the porch. 

[Bevo&Pevo 5148]

^^^ Reminds of Robert the Bruce's leper father in Braveheart.  

[gofuckyourself 8240]

Most popular candies, according to Instacart anyway. Flagrant promotional crap but Florida (Dum-Dums) is quite accurate. Oklahoma needs a recount though.

Texas and Hawaii kinda fancy.

And Mississippi and West Virginia with terrible taste, as expected.

[RamjetFDO 10575]

[nnm 36405]

1 hour ago, RamjetFDO said:

Bert?

[RamjetFDO 10575]

Bert?

Keep looking.

[millhouse 2607]

9 hours ago, gofuckyourself said:

Most popular candies, according to Instacart anyway. Flagrant promotional crap but Florida (Dum-Dums) is quite accurate. Oklahoma needs a recount though.

Texas and Hawaii kinda fancy.

And Mississippi and West Virginia with terrible taste, as expected.

I agree with you on Mississippi, but WV is pretty solid with peanut butter cups. Or do you not know what WV looks like?

[Laxtonto 12080]

7 hours ago, nnm said:

Bert?

bottom right... .that sneaky fucker

[gofuckyourself 8240]

4 minutes ago, millhouse said:

I agree with you on Mississippi, but WV is pretty solid with peanut butter cups. Or do you not know what WV looks like?

I hurried the throw, very little pressure too.

Then I couldn't edit and hoped no one saw the gaffe.

So let's just all agree to move on and not lose sight of the point that candy corn sucks.

[Jerry Callo 8703]

11 hours ago, gofuckyourself said:

I hurried the throw, very little pressure too.

Then I couldn't edit and hoped no one saw the gaffe.

So let's just all agree to move on and not lose sight of the point that candy corn sucks.

[Prepuce of Doom 21073]

A few more players have entered the game. 

[squib 1120]

6 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

A few more players have entered the game. 

That butternut squash: "What dafuck did I do?"

[Prepuce of Doom 21073]

14 minutes ago, squib said:

That butternut squash: "What dafuck did I do?"

Doomlet insisted that we purchase it because it looks like a bird. 

[RamjetFDO 10575]

13 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

Doomlet insisted that we purchase it because it looks like a bird. 

[nnm 36405]

Hang it in the Louvre

[gernblansten 3197]

On 10/16/2023 at 11:05 AM, gofuckyourself said:

Most popular candies, according to Instacart anyway. Flagrant promotional crap but Florida (Dum-Dums) is quite accurate. Oklahoma needs a recount though.

Texas and Hawaii kinda fancy.

And Mississippi and West Virginia with terrible taste, as expected.

Florida was obvious.

[Shoxthemonkey 1981]

15 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

Doomlet insisted that we purchase it because it looks like a bird. 

Welp, I had a joke racked into the chamber but fuck if I'm gonna compete with Ramjet.

[NWBuck 8567]

No where near as good as the dessicated zombies that were posted earlier, but I love these compilations of carving artistry.

[Laxtonto 12080]

 

[dcbc 14484]

Year 1

[Armybrat 40847]

[Esque 135]

Is traditional Halloween fading away versus what it was say 30 years ago?  We have young children and are starting to get into that phase of life.  A few observations.

1. There are a lot of events we are invited to that are "safe spaces" for trick or treating.

• Our church threw a "Trunk or Treat" where families from the church decorated the trunks of their cars and parked side by side in the parking lot.  There were maybe 75+ cars this year and no less than 500+ kids.
• Our daycare facility held a "Trick of Treat" event at the daycare.  We did not go.
• Our City hosted a "Spooky Square" event where businesses and households line up around the old town square to hand out candy and toys.
• We've been invited to half a dozen other, similar events through family and friends.

1. There are a lot less houses in general that are participating in Halloween.  On our street maybe three of the 25+ houses have their lights on and hand our candy.  As a result, we don't get many people coming through.  There's one stretch in our subdivision - just one - where the neighbors are older and have come together to activate that stretch of 20 or so homes, i.e. everyone is committed to lights on, music on, decorating, and so forth.  So that tends to get any traffic.
2. Weather seems to be increasingly an issue.  Looks like it will be mid-40s and rainy this year.  I understand as a parent opting for other events, which have weather contingency plans baked in, to get that Halloween fix for the kids.

I don't remember this when I was younger.  Change in society / culture?  Or just now observing what has always been the case?

[honolulu horn 6158]

18 minutes ago, Esque said:

Is traditional Halloween fading away versus what it was say 30 years ago?  We have young children and are starting to get into that phase of life.  A few observations.

1. There are a lot of events we are invited to that are "safe spaces" for trick or treating.

• Our church threw a "Trunk or Treat" where families from the church decorated the trunks of their cars and parked side by side in the parking lot.  There were maybe 75+ cars this year and no less than 500+ kids.
• Our daycare facility held a "Trick of Treat" event at the daycare.  We did not go.
• Our City hosted a "Spooky Square" event where businesses and households line up around the old town square to hand out candy and toys.
• We've been invited to half a dozen other, similar events through family and friends.

1. There are a lot less houses in general that are participating in Halloween.  On our street maybe three of the 25+ houses have their lights on and hand our candy.  As a result, we don't get many people coming through.  There's one stretch in our subdivision - just one - where the neighbors are older and have come together to activate that stretch of 20 or so homes, i.e. everyone is committed to lights on, music on, decorating, and so forth.  So that tends to get any traffic.
2. Weather seems to be increasingly an issue.  Looks like it will be mid-40s and rainy this year.  I understand as a parent opting for other events, which have weather contingency plans baked in, to get that Halloween fix for the kids.

I don't remember this when I was younger.  Change in society / culture?  Or just now observing what has always been the case?

If our neighborhood is any indication, trick or treating door-to-door is stronger than ever. Kajillions of kids walking around each year, parents having a great time, decorations everywhere. Honestly I love Halloween -- the one time of year we tell kids to go knock on stranger's doors, because good things are going to happen. Bring it on. 

[Dnaguy 11964]

18 minutes ago, Esque said:

Is traditional Halloween fading away versus what it was say 30 years ago?  We have young children and are starting to get into that phase of life.  A few observations.

1. There are a lot of events we are invited to that are "safe spaces" for trick or treating.

• Our church threw a "Trunk or Treat" where families from the church decorated the trunks of their cars and parked side by side in the parking lot.  There were maybe 75+ cars this year and no less than 500+ kids.
• Our daycare facility held a "Trick of Treat" event at the daycare.  We did not go.
• Our City hosted a "Spooky Square" event where businesses and households line up around the old town square to hand out candy and toys.
• We've been invited to half a dozen other, similar events through family and friends.

1. There are a lot less houses in general that are participating in Halloween.  On our street maybe three of the 25+ houses have their lights on and hand our candy.  As a result, we don't get many people coming through.  There's one stretch in our subdivision - just one - where the neighbors are older and have come together to activate that stretch of 20 or so homes, i.e. everyone is committed to lights on, music on, decorating, and so forth.  So that tends to get any traffic.
2. Weather seems to be increasingly an issue.  Looks like it will be mid-40s and rainy this year.  I understand as a parent opting for other events, which have weather contingency plans baked in, to get that Halloween fix for the kids.

I don't remember this when I was younger.  Change in society / culture?  Or just now observing what has always been the case?

Not to get too CR, but housing prices being what they are…. The idea of a whole neighborhood of young families who have kids is something of the past.

Property tax limitation for olds, high prices, wage stagnation lead to shitty halloweens. 
🤷‍♂️

[Prepuce of Doom 21073]

Today was Summoning Day. 

I think that I have two that are likely mortal, and two that may be eternal. 

This year's alpha gourd is Lemonhead. It will likely outlive us all. 

 

[Prepuce of Doom 21073]

The other likely immortal is Peanut M&M. These two came from our usual hookup. 

[Prepuce of Doom 21073]

The two that I don't think are good candidates for immortality are Skittle (the more round of the two) and Milk Dud (the one that looks a little like Marty Feldman).

Fun fact #1: Milk Duds were so named because of their non-uniform and disappointing shape. 

Fun fact #2: Milk Duds are criminally underrated. 

 

 

[Covri 6249]

41 minutes ago, Esque said:

Is traditional Halloween fading away versus what it was say 30 years ago?  We have young children and are starting to get into that phase of life.  A few observations.

1. There are a lot of events we are invited to that are "safe spaces" for trick or treating.

• Our church threw a "Trunk or Treat" where families from the church decorated the trunks of their cars and parked side by side in the parking lot.  There were maybe 75+ cars this year and no less than 500+ kids.
• Our daycare facility held a "Trick of Treat" event at the daycare.  We did not go.
• Our City hosted a "Spooky Square" event where businesses and households line up around the old town square to hand out candy and toys.
• We've been invited to half a dozen other, similar events through family and friends.

1. There are a lot less houses in general that are participating in Halloween.  On our street maybe three of the 25+ houses have their lights on and hand our candy.  As a result, we don't get many people coming through.  There's one stretch in our subdivision - just one - where the neighbors are older and have come together to activate that stretch of 20 or so homes, i.e. everyone is committed to lights on, music on, decorating, and so forth.  So that tends to get any traffic.
2. Weather seems to be increasingly an issue.  Looks like it will be mid-40s and rainy this year.  I understand as a parent opting for other events, which have weather contingency plans baked in, to get that Halloween fix for the kids.

I don't remember this when I was younger.  Change in society / culture?  Or just now observing what has always been the case?

Trunk or treat started as a small town thing where it wasn’t easy for kids to go door to door so they would centralize trick or treating somewhere kids could get a lot of candy in a small area. Naturally it spread to suburbs and cities because it’s way more convenient in many cases. Churches were/are common places to host. Traditional trick or treating day of still exists too and really depends on the neighborhood. Our neighborhood has actually had more young families move in the last couple years so it’s gotten busier than it was five years ago but it’s still probably only a 1/3 house participation. We handed out candy even before kids because we felt like we needed to for the kids and the neighborhood as homeowners. We have two boys now so my wife walks them and I stay back and hand out candy. Both of us doing the walking effectively shut us down from handing out candy because no way I’m leaving a bowl out with a sign, shit half the kids didn’t even listen to take 1-2 pieces from me holding the bowl out and just grab handfuls anyways.  

[Prepuce of Doom 21073]

As you all may recall, the contrast and detail is difficult to effectively photograph early on, but their true character will emerge with time and exposure. 

It's supposed to get down below freezing the next couple of nights here in Chicago, and we're expecting snow during trick or treating. Not sure whether the chill will hasten or retard the putrification process. 

A few shots of the whole gang and our bird tableau. 

 

 

 

Edited October 30, 2023 by Prepuce of Doom
Putrification, not purification!

[Covri 6249]

20 minutes ago, Dnaguy said:

Not to get too CR, but housing prices being what they are…. The idea of a whole neighborhood of young families who have kids is something of the past.

Property tax limitation for olds, high prices, wage stagnation lead to shitty halloweens. 
🤷‍♂️

*unless you’ve moved to the newest 500k+ home master planned golf cart community designed for families so you can be around 2000 people who happen to be in the similar tax bracket top 5% types. And an hour outside city center.

[Dnaguy 11964]

1 hour ago, Covri said:

*unless you’ve moved to the newest 500k+ home master planned golf cart community designed for families so you can be around 2000 people who happen to be in the similar tax bracket top 5% types. And an hour outside city center.

Sad.

I mean, I grew up on a culdesac of houses from 60-100k. We had 10-14 kids all within a 5 year range.

Blue collar. 1st Gen. White collar.

this wasn’t 1953. It was the 90’s.

Home ownership is different now.

I am lucky to have ‘leveled up’. But it’s sad now in  sense.

We ran that street. Adults had to face their differences. We had jahova witnesses, Pentecostals, secular families, black, white, Mexican, India (really!), Phillapino, etc. 

We watched the super bowel together. Played baseball together. Rode bikes together. I am lucky to grow up on that street. My children have opportunities I don’t, but they won’t ever have Misty pines Dr. 
 

[Longboard Horn 40325]

[Sam Lin 3559]

3 hours ago, Dnaguy said:

We watched the super bowel together. 

Hey, you do you man.

[baboso 6056]

Quote

 

There are over 24,500 registered sex offenders in the state of Georgia. Only some of them have to follow a special set of rules on Halloween.

Those who are on parole or probation must:

Turn off all outside lights

Not decorate their home for the holiday, or pass out candy

Not answer the door, unless it's for a law enforcement officer or an emergency responder

 

Kind of how I handle Halloween anyway.

 

[52-80 19159]

Our subdivision had about 1/3rd house participation. The one across the street above 1/2. Lots of adorable kids going door to door, many without chaperones. Few tween’ish aged kids, and fewer grabbing greedy handfuls from our bowl.  Living in a high trust community and society is nice. Took our goddaughter to her first trick or treat and she had a blast.