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Desantis is a POS and needs his own thread

Gil Bang

By Gil Bang
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Poe It Up
Poe It Up

It has less to do with that and more to do with the breakdown of the nuclear family. It all traces back to fathers staying home and raising their children. Single income families will never escape pov

wildcat09
wildcat09

Good call.

Surlymermaid
Surlymermaid

I really try to consider every opinion with an open mind, realizing we all have different values, thought processes, cultures, etc. But some of you make this so fucking difficult. I am a school cou

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Biff Tannen

Biff Tannen 45,750

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Posted
12 minutes ago, YGIFS said:

wait, his real name is Gert?  That explains a lot about his salty demeanor.

And please tell me as some sort of poetic justice, Hurricane Mar-got kills a bunch of people at Mar-a-Lago.  

Hope we don’t get to Nigel, cause that shit goes to 11. 
 

 

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YGIFS

YGIFS 19,452

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Posted

At the very least, before we die from the floods, we’ll have lots of “this one goes up to cat 6”

well why not have cat 5 include these higher wind speeds and have that be the top category?  

But these go to six. 

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TexasEd

TexasEd 8,077

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On 7/26/2023 at 7:48 AM, South Austin said:

I don't know where we are on the hurricane alphabetical naming system, but it would be great if the next powerful hurricane to hit Florida was named Joseph.

 

On 7/26/2023 at 8:54 AM, Biff Tannen said:

J for 2023 is Jose, unfortunately.

 

On 7/26/2023 at 9:14 AM, Bojack said:

Too bad. Maybe Kamala is K this year?

Needs to be a Rhonda. 

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WhatTheBuck

WhatTheBuck 28,805

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On 7/25/2023 at 1:02 PM, Horn Dog said:

"Kamala" is an ethnic name so high lighting it is a dog whistle to their racist audience.

But some of them also mispronounce it to rhyme with Pamela. Or sometimes you’ll see someone give two pronunciations: the first incorrect, the second correct, and then they’ll add, “or whatever.” I’m sure it’s intentional. 

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Biff Tannen

Biff Tannen 45,750

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58 minutes ago, WhatTheBuck said:

But some of them also mispronounce it to rhyme with Pamela. Or sometimes you’ll see someone give two pronunciations: the first incorrect, the second correct, and then they’ll add, “or whatever.” I’m sure it’s intentional. 

It’s intentional because she’s a black female who is not worth taking seriously to them. It’s both racist and misogynistic. 

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RDCanecutter

RDCanecutter 26,476

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1 hour ago, Pancho said:

Happy Black Girl GIF by iOne Digital

25 people? A common class size.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Hello Class, I'm Mr. DeSantis, you can call me Mr. D, and I need you all to listen up because I'm going to call the roll. After I call the roll, tell me if your name was not on the roll and we'll make a note to the office. After the roll we'll discuss the Woke Narra-- I mean The Narrative and you'll need to put your phones up and get ready to write some notes. Then we'll--

"Scuse me Mr. D."

Can it wait til the roll?

"I don't know, Mr. D."

Well (sigh) what's your name?

"wha-- Are you taking roll?"

[long slow breath] Yes. Taking roll just for you. What's your name?

"Jerry."

OK, Jerry, what seems to be the problem.

"Did you say your name was also Mr. Scott?"

Mr. Scott? As in Tim Scott? Yes. Yes, you've got me. I am obviously he.

"For real?"

[head bobbles] No not for real, are you deaf? I said first thing that my name is DeSantis.

"Well where is Mr. Scott's speech?"

what- ah-eh I DON'T KNOW. Do I look like I run Tim Scott's campaign? Maybe check out in the hall, see what it says on the events bulletin board.

"Mr. D?"

YES [checks notes] Jerry.

"Permission to be excused?"

YES. YES. You are excused. Everybody's excused. Go. Go.

[most of the crowd shuffles out except for Grammaw and Gum-Smacking Escort Who Follows Presidential Campaigns]

Grammaw: This Tim Scott looks almost white, but he's shorter than I expected.

Escort: Short or long, it's all a day at work. HEY GOVERNOR. [waves phone] I got me a Square reader that'll accept campaign expenses! Wanna come get some thigh food?

[DeSantis' head bobbles, sweat trickling down forehead as camera slowly moves in and FADE]

 

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YGIFS

YGIFS 19,452

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39 minutes ago, The Royal We said:

What’s with the vest? It’s balls hot in Iowa too isn’t it?

With the heat index, given the time of his appearance outdoors there---it was roughly 95 degrees.  He's a fucking idiot.  

He has to where that because it has his name on it and nobody there knows who the hell he is.  He could easily get a dry-fit polo or golf shirt with his name on the breast pocket...but he doesn't because he has to do everything the meatball way.  

Guy polling ahead of him started his slow walk into two serious indictments today and tripped over himself on multiple media outlets, and Ron's response was, "Let's get like 19 Iowans together with some raw meat.  And for attire, get me my finest velour!"  

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Bullneck

Bullneck 19,213

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Posted
20 hours ago, Pancho said:

Hardly anyone will remember this guy 10 years from now.  He'll be doing whatever Rick Perry is doing now, which is probably grifting in a think tank or consulting for an oil company on how to stop people from saving their children from climate change.  

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Gap03

Gap03 3,336

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Posted (edited)
12 hours ago, HenryJames said:

Fucking weirdo.

It's like one of those bad lip reading videos except they don't even need to bother with the bad lip reading ...

 

Edited by Gap03
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4th&Five

4th&Five 41,599

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18 minutes ago, Bullneck said:

Hardly anyone will remember this guy 10 years from now.  He'll be doing whatever Rick Perry is doing now, which is probably grifting in a think tank or consulting for an oil company on how to stop people from saving their children from climate change.  

Skipping Rick Perry GIF by Dancing with the Stars

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Pescado_Rojo

Pescado_Rojo 19,431

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Posted (edited)
16 hours ago, TheStoicPaisano said:

🙈

 

I'm bored, so let's do this. Left to Right:

Kash- Owner's son and "General Manager". Hungover AF. Rolls in around 10:00 most days, takes 1.5Hr lunches, then leaves around 3:00. Hobbies include hog hunting, drinking whiskey, and sexually assaulting the strippers at that joint on the county line. Has a crush on his step-mom Janet. 

Janet - Owner's second wife, former secretary and mother to his oops baby. Hates Kash with a passion because he won't stop staring at her. Having an affair with Ricky and trying to figure out how to get around her prenup. 

Maryanne - Secretly a liberal. Hates this town, but she's stuck here taking care of her sick mother. Dreams of moving to Kansas City or maybe Denver when her mom passes. 

Ricky - Does 90% of the work at this place, but can't go any higher with Kash around. Also hates Kash with a passion. Kinda wants to move to the city, but Janet is the best piece he's ever had, and she says she's gonna leave her husband for him. 

Big Jim - Owner. Janet's husband, but she hasn't touched him in months. Really more of a Trump guy, but he owes the county party chair a favor for getting Kash out of a DWI last year. Paid for the bartender at the country club to go to Denver for an abortion that might have been his last month. 

Candice - Office Manager. Hates the whole family, but she needs this job. Has a crush on Ricky, but she thinks he's fooling around with Janet. 

Meatball Ron - Bored out of his mind, but his handlers say he has to do this. Knows he's got a big juicy booger in his right nostril and can't wait to pick and eat it. 

Gary - County party chair and country lawyer. Was the star of the high school football team in 1989, and people still want to talk about how they almost made it to state. Has gotten both Kash and Big Jim out of DWIs the past few years. Deacon at the First Baptist Church. Can't wait to go to CPAC and get himself a hooker this year.

Mary - Gary's wife and former head cheerleader. Has never had sex with anyone except Gary, who took her virginity senior year in the back of his Bronco II. Thinks this Ron guy is weird as fuck. Doesn't feel like cooking tonight, so hopes Gary will be okay with going out. 

Edited by Pescado_Rojo
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