Jimbo 2020: Strangers with Candi

[Fondren & Main 6903]

I can see them at 8-2 rolling into Athens.  Absolutely brutal to have to play @Georgia and @LSU.  8-4 looks like the ceiling to me.

[Katfid54 9005]

4 minutes ago, HtownHorn said:

they have pulled off the Auburn, Arkansas, MSU, and Ole Miss sweep exactly once, their 1st year in the conference with a 2-3 loss Big 12 team. Yet, they are completely overlooking these 5 games as easy wins because, why not.

The math does not seem to check out.

[HtownHorn 15235]

Just now, Fondren & Main said:

I can see them at 8-2 rolling into Athens.  Absolutely brutal to have to play @Georgia and @LSU.  8-4 looks like the ceiling to me.

How? They have never swept Auburn, Arkansas, Ole Miss, MSU, and South Carolina.

[Mr. Drummond 2244]

What percentage of the people buying the "Don't care, got Jimbo" mug get that its a joke?

 

Answer - 2%

 

[Magus Ossis 2997]

1 minute ago, Katfid54 said:

The math does not seem to check out.

USCe cloaked

[Redneck Mutha 8179]

2 minutes ago, Katfid54 said:

The math does not seem to check out.

It's easy to mistake 4 middle of the road sec teams for 5.

[Katfid54 9005]

1 minute ago, Magus Ossis said:

USCe cloaked

Wtf keep that shit in the Cloakroom.

[Fud 9724]

They have essentially three weeks to prepare for South Carolina. What a joke. 

[Deej 77844]

12 minutes ago, Fondren & Main said:

I can see them at 8-2 rolling into Athens.  Absolutely brutal to have to play @Georgia and @LSU.  8-4 looks like the ceiling to me.

I can't see that. Jimbo is already sending them home early from practice for not being into it. I can't imagine this team is motivated to win every game outside the big four. The last five weeks of Tom Herman drinking Jimbo's milkshake on the recruiting front has to be felt by the team. Coach Ritz Bits may have a problem keeping those guys' attention. 

[totallynotabuttpirate 5484]

2 minutes ago, Deej said:

The last five weeks of Tom Herman drinking Jimbo's milkshake on the recruiting front....

Don't you mean Jimbo drinking Tom Herman's milkshake??  

[Orange&White 5573]

They lost a lot on a team that wasn't terribly good, and are paper thin at key positions.

I think they lose all four that are obvious and 1-2 more.

I am going with 7-5 and 6-6 being far more likely than 8-4.

But they will obviously be the best 6-6 team in the country.

[Mitch Cumsteen 18963]

[Ricky's one-hitter 9622]

3 minutes ago, Orange&White said:

I think they lose all four that are obvious and 1-2 more.

Yes, exactly. They'll lose 2 of 3 vs Auburn, Miss State, and UofSC. Based on schedule placement, it's probably state and sc

[Deej 77844]

7 minutes ago, totallynotabuttpirate said:

Don't you mean Jimbo drinking Tom Herman's milkshake??  

If you're looking at it through maroon-colored glasses, then sure. 

[Orange&White 5573]

3 minutes ago, Mitch Cumsteen said:

Jesus Fucksticks is that funny!

[Mitch Cumsteen 18963]

[ShowmeyourTDs 1160]

40 minutes ago, Mr. Drummond said:

What percentage of the people buying the "Don't care, got Jimbo" mug get that its a joke?

 

Answer - 2%

 

Damn pot bangers.

[Magus Ossis 2997]

Aggy is 1-6 against each of LSU and Bama, 0-0 against UGA since joining the SEC. Using 1 in 7 as a probability for winning any given tough game seems fair. They are 28-14 against the rest of the conference. Using 2/3 as a probability seems a bit (not un)fairly harsh, so let's assign a probability with only half the chance of a loss: 5/6. Obviously this involves some generalization and a few other assumptions, but that would put the likelihood of beating all the (conference) weak sisters at 40%, compared to that of losing to all the better teams of 54%. If one uses the historically documented 2/3 figure, that 40% drops to 13%

[ChickenSandwich 9960]

1 hour ago, closetojumping said:

I mean, I watched most of their games last year. I watch 40-50 games a weekend in the fall, mostly sober. I follow their recruiting and roster management since they're relevant to us in this state for recruiting. I read the magazines and their practice updates. I cannot, for the life of me, understand the thinking on their end that they are a top 10, possibly a top 5 team in performance or talent this year. I understand delusion and aggie logic. I just ..., well, it's insane.

They have a bunch of dudes named Bob on the DL besides Marmaduke. Maybe if Johnson and Hines are healthy all season they'll be okay at LB. They don't have a legitimate CB that can cover something better than a dead man. They've got safeties, but they're either slow, inexperienced, or both.

They lost their best OL and have a bunch of guards named Jagger. Mond is fine if he can go uninjured. He's not going to carry the team, however. Corbin is apparently a fine back, but he's replacing the conference leader. They lost their best TE and have a tackle dummy lining up there right now. They've got solid receiving talent. 

The schedule is fucking embarrassing at the bottom and ruthless at the top. I'm not saying they face a clean sweep of the top 4 games, but I also don't believe they run the table on Auburn, SC, Arkansas, Miss State, and Ole Miss. They could easily lose 3 of those games and 3/4 of the big 4 that they play and struggle to make the postseason. They'll need to be healthy and lucky to do something better than 7-6 this year. The best 7-6 in the country, no doubt, but come the fuck on.

Same....but the thing that jumped out to me most was how shitty the sec is after the top 3. 

The shitty offenses keep games close and allow a terrible Barn to comeback on Aggy last season. This mid level has no consistency and flip flop between 5-9 wins depending on SEC schedule. 

2 months into the season they were still selling Kentucky as a top 10 team because they beat a shitty Florida team and played a D2 schedule. 

Edited August 19, 2019 by ChickenSandwich

[Fondren & Main 6903]

55 minutes ago, HtownHorn said:

How? They have never swept Auburn, Arkansas, Ole Miss, MSU, and South Carolina.

They get Auburn, Miss St and South Carolina at home.  Arkansas is probably due to finally beat them, but Arkansas really sucks fucking ass too.  Like a lot.

They have to go on the road to Ole Miss, but Ta'amu is gone and their coach looks like an orange slice/Capri Sun kind of guy.  I can see them taking those at 5-0 very easily w/ a junior QB that is very mobile.

Their non-conference aside from Clemson is a complete joke.  Reminds me of Mack's schedules when Trev Alberts used to rake us over the coals.

They're probably more likely to split their big 4 games at 2-2 and fuck up somewhere along the way against an easier opponent which still would put them at 8-4.  Perpetual mediocrity is what they do.  They haven't stepped in a big pile of shit since they canned Sherman.

Edited August 19, 2019 by Fondren & Main

[Fud 9724]

2 minutes ago, Fondren & Main said:

They're probably more likely to split their big 4 games at 2-2 and fuck up somewhere along the way against an easier opponent which still would put them at 8-4.  Perpetual mediocrity is what they do.  They haven't stepped in a big pile of shit since they canned Sherman.

They aren't splitting their big four games. Come on. 

[fattyflattie 4640]

53 minutes ago, Mr. Drummond said:

What percentage of the people buying the "Don't care, got Jimbo" mug get that its a joke?

 

Answer - 2%

 

I think I’ll grab one now, so once Jimbo takes all their money, and what little dignity they had is all gone, I can use it daily around the office.  A constant reminder of times on the upward coaster. 

[Fondren & Main 6903]

1 minute ago, Fud said:

They aren't splitting their big four games. Come on. 

I mean I have them at 1-3, but it's what they do.  Reggie McNeal beat Number 1 Oklahoma in 2002 then they totally shit the bed the next week against Mizzou and Mack buttfucks them to end the year.  It's what Aggy does.  They win a game they have no business winning only to shit the bed against a bad team the very next week.

[Voluminous Banality 1162]

7 minutes ago, Fondren & Main said:

They get Auburn, Miss St and South Carolina at home.

You can probably count on LSU-type officiating in those home games, if needed, as well.

[Scholz 12309]

1 minute ago, Fondren & Main said:

It's what Aggy does.  They win a game they have no business winning only to shit the bed against a bad team the very next week.

[ShaggyBevo RIP 3873]

42 minutes ago, Ricky's one-hitter said:

Yes, exactly. They'll lose 2 of 3 vs Auburn, Miss State, and UofSC. Based on schedule placement, it's probably state and sc

Auburn may have the SEC's best DL. USCe was was injury plagued last year and those guys are presently healthy plus they added Feaster.

[Scholz 12309]

Just now, ShaggyBevo RIP said:

Auburn may have the SEC's best DL. USCe was was injury plagued last year and those guys are presently healthy plus they added Feaster.

...and the loss to the Gamecocks will just show how great Clemson is letting Feaster go, thus elevating their signature loss on the season.  Advantage aggy.

[BabaYaga 15625]

25 minutes ago, Scholz said:

Such a great game.  Good friend is an Ag and we were coming back from the ranch.  Had the game on the radio.  His in-car meltdown was amazing.  Wish I'd been able to video record the whole thing.  I still give him shit for how spun up he got

[Chopper 17432]

38 minutes ago, ChickenSandwich said:

2 months into the season they were still selling Kentucky as a top 10 team because they beat a shitty Florida team and played a D2 schedule. 

This is dead-on. The KY qb was physically incapable of throwing a downfield pass. And still aggy only beat them by 6 at Pyle Field. 

[HtownHorn 15235]

3 minutes ago, Chopper said:

This is dead-on. The KY qb was physically incapable of throwing a downfield pass. And still aggy only beat them by 6 at Pyle Field. 

To be fair their FG kicker was really shitty, too.

[Ricky's one-hitter 9622]

29 minutes ago, Fondren & Main said:

They win a game they have no business winning only to shit the bed against a bad team the very next week.

Fuck off with that garbage. They've won 1 game above their pay grade in 10 years

Spoiler

Ranked team wins

2008
None

2009
21 TTU

2010
11 Oklahoma
9 Nebraska

2011
20 Baylor

2012
23 Louisiana Tech
17 Miss St
1 Alabama
12 Oklahoma

2013
22 Duke

2014
9 South Carolina
3 Auburn (finished 8-5)

2015
15 Arizona State
21 Miss. State

2016
16 UCLA
17 Arkansas
9 Tennessee

2017
None

2018
13 Kentucky
6 LSU

 

 

 

[ShaggyBevo RIP 3873]

Continuing down the bad outcome dreams, what would it take for the guys that signed on for Sumlin to quit on Jimbo?

[RomaVicta 30602]

1 hour ago, Orange&White said:

"Don't Care, Got Jimbo" merch will be worth it's weight in gold in a couple of years. 

It reminds of how sad I was that I never pulled the trigger on my "Get FRANtic! shirt.

It'd be worth it to buy and store away until the disillusionment rises to full flame.

What a great gift for the Aggie co-worker or loudest mouthed Aggie you know.

[Scholz 12309]

1 minute ago, ShaggyBevo RIP said:

Continuing down the bad outcome dreams, what would it take for the guys that signed on for Sumlin to quit on Jimbo?

I doubt much

[ChickenSandwich 9960]

Ritz Bitz

[BurntOrangeCrush 1028]

1 hour ago, Scholz said:

This never gets old

[texifornia 59017]

[Fud 9724]

Pretty sure you have to spend two years at JUCO if you don't qualify, unless you go to prep school for one year 

[Scholz 12309]

The pool party lulz.

[Magus Ossis 2997]

8 minutes ago, Fud said:

Pretty sure you have to spend two years at JUCO if you don't qualify, unless you go to prep school for one year 

Yeah, I think that .8958 phenom won't be there to help aggy until 2021 at the earliest-- you know, after the next natty.

[Pato del Muerto 53519]

46 minutes ago, ShaggyBevo RIP said:

Continuing down the bad outcome dreams, what would it take for the guys that signed on for Sumlin to quit on Jimbo?

They’ll all have to be gone after this season to make room for the 27 new ags in this class. Except for mond. 

[Pato del Muerto 53519]

13 minutes ago, Fud said:

Pretty sure you have to spend two years at JUCO if you don't qualify, unless you go to prep school for one year 

Unless the guy, who didn’t buckle down in high school despite the stakes, decided to buckle down and hammer out an associates in his one year plus summers. 

[BigVegasHorn26 630]

What happened to the other DL that didn’t qualify?  Mowery?

[Elmer_Fudd 22994]

3 minutes ago, BigVegasHorn26 said:

What happened to the other DL that didn’t qualify?  Mowery?

Supposedly enrolling in January.

[GRHorn 105]

20 minutes ago, Scholz said:

The pool party lulz.

Yep. Akinola keeping that pool party momentum going by working hard on one recruit since then. Said recruit, then backs off commitment timeline. Lol

[nunna yo bizness 1690]

1 hour ago, BabaYaga said:

Such a great game.  Good friend is an Ag and we were coming back from the ranch.  Had the game on the radio.  His in-car meltdown was amazing.  Wish I'd been able to video record the whole thing.  I still give him shit for how spun up he got

This phrase does not make sense.

[nunna yo bizness 1690]

3 hours ago, Ricky's one-hitter said:

The most self aware corner of self aware merch

B.A.S. (Battered Aggie Syndrome)
noun
A debilitating disease affecting the mental sstability of all modern-day Texas A&M football fans. Symptoms include irrational outrage, loss of appetite, hopelessness, and an inability to enjoy current success due to fear of future failure
 

I'll give you one guess what the cause of BAS is

Sheep semen?

[BabaYaga 15625]

1 minute ago, nunna yo bizness said:

This phrase does not make sense.

LOL.  Are you not aware of the Ag-Paradox?  

In simple terms - alone or in small numbers, the Ag is not only tolerable, and can be a welcome addition (or in this case, his Longhorn wife who is cool as shit).  But in larger groups, massive fuckery cannot be contained.  

Example:  every group of ags with a sample size over 10.  In public....ever.  

 

[UDontKnow 10572]

10 minutes ago, BabaYaga said:

LOL.  Are you not aware of the Ag-Paradox?  

In simple terms - alone or in small numbers, the Ag is not only tolerable, and can be a welcome addition (or in this case, his Longhorn wife who is cool as shit).  But in larger groups, massive fuckery cannot be contained.  

Example:  every group of ags with a sample size over 10 of 2 or more.  In public....ever.  

 

fixed it for you.

[golfclap 6903]

Been traveling - so reading on the phone is a bitch. Has this perfect nugget been posted yet? It’s like he senses the truths — but they can’t stop the Jimbomentum in his aggy heart. 

So. Delicious. 

 

 

Edited August 19, 2019 by golfclap