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A story about a pathetic man's downfall [34 Felony Convictions]

Francisco 2.0

By Francisco 2.0
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Beau Vine
Beau Vine

To be fair, President Trump’s four years in office weren’t so bad, except when when he incited an insurrection against the government, mismanaged a pandemic that killed nearly half a million Americans

Bama Chick
Bama Chick

Y’all about to get a great visual representation of Cullman, Alabama. Only good things to come out of Cullman are the Britt brothers (Roll Tide!) and orange rolls from All Steak restaurant. That pla

ChiTownDoc
ChiTownDoc

You seem really pissed off for a nontrumper.  Just laugh at the trumpers, bro.  They’re really gullible dumbfucks who worship this orange blob…you know, people completely unlike yourself.  

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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

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What's going to happen is if sales continue to stagnate, some donor will step in and "buy" 5,000 seats or one of their own Trump PAC's will re-direct contributions to buy out the house.  They'll do whatever they can to show it's a sell-out on paper.  Problem is, you can fool the promoter, you can fool the talent, but you can't fool the house.  The venues are going to notice the turnstile figures, the parking lot figures, the lack of F&B sales, even trivial shit that they measure like how many rolls of toilet paper and bins of napkins were used during a performance.  

So the real fun part is going to see how Trump & O'Reilly fill the house.  They're gonna push out free tickets to nursing homes, college campuses, homeless people, et. al.  Those people will still show up with their free ticket but they won't buy anything once they're there so again, the venue will smell something rotten in Denmark.  So they're also gonna have to give out concession vouchers, free transportation, etc.  It's gonna be a colossal kickback clusterfuck.  But should be an interesting tutorial on how acts can cover their reputation on lame-duck tour sales going forward.  Could be fun for the industry to study.  

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Grade of D as in David

Grade of D as in David 13253

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9 hours ago, Chooky said:

It's also hilarious how all of us are so conditioned to his mediocrity that it isn't a big deal to hear that the objective for staffing the government in the most dynamic country on the planet was to find "stars."  How did we avoid Ambassador Hulk Hogan and Secretary Kardashian? 

And secretary of defense sgt slaughter

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Grade of D as in David

Grade of D as in David 13253

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8 hours ago, Bevo14 said:

I've made a mockup of my latest product. Just $199.99 to own the dirty libs in your life that don't love their country.

567333312_top-view-flat-white-pebble-isolated-174334658(1).jpg.961f0ddae5319d4b8e0e77ea4bbf1fca.jpg

 

Can we get some leftover tamagotchi that we can rebrand trumpagotchis that require constant adulation in the form of micro donations of a nickel or a penny every 30 minutes

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Francisco 2.0

Francisco 2.0 32406

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9 hours ago, Biff Tannen said:

Where are these statements released?

His latest spokesperson.  Someone types up his words onto an official "looking" press release from the 45th president, and she posts a jpg of it on Twitter.

 

Why Twitter hasn't canceled her account yet, I have no idea.  It's a circumvention of his ban, and some days she will blast out 5 or more of these statements.

 

 

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Mrs Whiggins

Mrs Whiggins 13050

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2 minutes ago, Bookman said:

"Dual in the Sun"?

Yes, The Dual in the Sun. Which occurred *checks notes* thirty-seven years before Trump bought the property.

Edited by Mrs Whiggins
And I'm an idiot for not noticing the 'e' excuse me, need more coffee.
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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

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Wait, did he say he was "many-time Club champion"?  As in he won the club championship there on numerous occasions?  Or is this some country club lingo I don't understand because I'm only half white/  ?

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Francisco 2.0

Francisco 2.0 32406

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5 minutes ago, Lobo said:

Wait, did he say he was "many-time Club champion"?  As in he won the club championship there on numerous occasions?  Or is this some country club lingo I don't understand because I'm only half white/  ?

 

Rick Reilly wrote a book early in the Presidency about Trump, the golf cheat.  It wasn't a political tome; it was merely stories from others about how Trump cheats at golf.

Here's a quote:

Quote

Trump’s deceit about his golfing achievements motivated Reilly to resume writing. “I was retired, living in Italy for three months a year, drinking Campari. I kept seeing on my Twitter feed [Reilly mimics Trump]: ‘I’m a champion. You should vote for me because I’ve won 18 club championships.’ Whoa! That’s a lie because you already told me how you did it. Whenever you open a new course, you play by yourself and declare yourself the first club champion.’ I’m like, ‘That’s a shitty lie.’

 

And another:

 

Quote

Well, this story isn’t in the book but it’s wild. While Trump was meeting with Kim Jong Un in Singapore, a club championship was held at Trump International, the course Trump built near Mar-a-Lago in Florida. So later on, Trump’s back on the course there with the Secret Service and the SWAT team guys and all that stuff. And he sees Ted Virtue, who was involved in the financing of the movie Green Book.

I could never get Virtue to call me back on all this, but Golf.com reported it and I heard it from two members of the club as well. They say Virtue was there playing with his son. Trump sees Ted on the 9th hole and and decides to drive his cart over. He tells Ted: “Congrats on winning the club championship, but you didn’t really win it, because I was out of town.”

Ted tries to laugh it off, but Trump is dead serious. Trump says, “We’re gonna play these last six holes for the championship.” And Ted’s like, “Oh, well, I’m playing with my son, but thanks anyway.” But Trump says, “It’s okay. Your son can play, too.” So what are you going to do? He’s the president. It’s his course. They end up playing.

Apparently, they get to a hole with a big pond in front of the green. Both Ted and his son hit the ball on the green, but Trump hits his in the water. By the time they get to the hole, though, Trump is lining up the son’s ball. Only now it’s his ball and the caddie has switched it. 

The son is like, “That’s my ball!” But Trump’s caddie goes, “No, this is the president’s ball; your ball went in the water.” Ted and his son look at each other confused, not sure if this is really happening. Trump makes that putt, and wins one up. Then, according to Golf.com, he tells Virtue something like, “I’ll tell you what, we’ll be co-champions.” 

But the members tell me that when you look at the plaques on Trump’s locker there, it says: “2018 Men’s Club Champion.” No “co-” at all.

 

Edited by Francisco 2.0
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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

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Don't sell yourself short, Reilly...Trump's a tremendous slouch.  

I've often though some of his upper middle-class dipshit supporters would finally say, "Look, I can handle the slander of troops, the tax fraud, the philandering, the likely child molestation, the usurping of democracy, the election fraud, the selling out of our nation to Russia...but I'll be goddamned if I'm gonna support a man who cheats at the club championship considering what a big, and completely meaningless, honor it is at my home club.  But, alas...nope.  

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JimmyJames

JimmyJames 12271

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21 minutes ago, Pato del Muerto said:

It’s one thing to ignore rules when playing for fun, but that assumes the rule adjustments are known and agreed upon by others playing with you.

But it’s never ok when it’s a tournament type environment and you NEVER fuck with another player’s ball. 

Trump is the only person on the planet who I’ve heard fucking with another guys golf ball. Before I heard that story a few years ago I had never even thought of that. Just an unbelievable piece of shit that guy is. 

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GhostOfTomJoad

GhostOfTomJoad 9348

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27 minutes ago, JimmyJames said:

Trump is the only person on the planet who I’ve heard fucking with another guys golf ball. Before I heard that story a few years ago I had never even thought of that. Just an unbelievable piece of shit that guy is. 

There's a story about Mike Tirico playing a round w/ Trump that Reilly also documented in his book.

 

Quote

And Trump doesn’t only give himself unfair advantages: he’s also been known to hobble his opponents. On another occasion recounted by Reilly, Trump was playing with Mike Tirico, the sportscaster, who hit a long, soaring second shot into a par five, high-fived his caddie, and headed for the green. When he got there, there was no sign of his ball; it had somehow ended up in a sand trap some fifty feet left of the pin. “Lousy break,” Trump said. Tirico was so befuddled that he took a seven. Afterward, Trump’s caddie told Tirico that his approach shot had actually finished up about ten feet from the hole. “Trump threw it into the bunker,” the caddie said. “I watched him do it.

 

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Bookman

Bookman 4639

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2 hours ago, JimmyJames said:

Trump is the only person on the planet who I’ve heard fucking with another guys golf ball. Before I heard that story a few years ago I had never even thought of that. Just an unbelievable piece of shit that guy is. 

In our 1994 district tournament some asshole from Boerne set his bag on top of an opponent's ball so it wouldn't be found.

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UpperWestside

UpperWestside 6185

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The cheating at golf gets at bigger issues with Trump. His particular narcissism is on a level that few of us are ever privy to, but since he loves attention of any kind we get to see it. He puts it right there in the storefront window so often, right next to his rampant racism, that psychiatrists could write books about him without ever having a single in-person encounter. 

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