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Baker Mayfield is a piece of shit catchall thread

Landomatic

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HornOnTheBayou
HornOnTheBayou

Hey @Helobious, would you mind saying, "I don't see any way Salma Hayek shows up at HornOnTheBayou's house and fucks him silly"?   Please and thank you.

Dennis Taylor
Dennis Taylor

You're just going to have to try harder.  That's not acceptable 

Askew
Askew

Are you aware of how fantastic of a malapropism this is? 

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wood

wood 11225

Posted
Posted
3 hours ago, Helobious said:

You’re out of your mind if you take Allen over Mayfield. I guess I could see arguments for Mahomes & Lamar after looking at the stats. 
But to be fair Goff just let his nuts hang right now. 

It's not possible for someone to be this stupid. Is it?

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wood

wood 11225

Posted
Posted (edited)
3 hours ago, Macklemore said:

INT at the last drive of the game. He is definitely best QB in the game 

The classic Baker game-ender.

Quote

Man, you hate to see Baker Mayfield single-handedly end his own team's season like that.

giphy.gif

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Posted
Posted (edited)
2 hours ago, Macklemore said:

Ric Flair was impressed with Baker’s performance and wants to hang out with him.

 

Anyone see Ric Flair hammered to Bolivian on Kill Tony? What an absolutely glorious trainwreck. 

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Deej

Deej 76755

Posted
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15 hours ago, Helobious said:

I hate him as much as the next guy, but you can’t really argue that he’s not the best QB in the league right now. Playing out of his mind lately. 

That 70S Show Lol GIF by IFC

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Tex Pete

Tex Pete 20337

Posted
Posted
On 1/16/2024 at 12:39 PM, ChiTownDoc said:

Yes.  I know it well.  Grew up a Dallas fan.  I’m being sucked back in hoping I can catch one more SB win with my old man but you just get kicked in the nuts every year.  Pathetic.  

Him and Vince should start a hedge fund.  Wally can manage it for them.  

None of us look to Vince as anything other than a transcendent football player and a great Longhorn. He’s never been an unrepentant douche. 
 

Baker Mayfield has always been something straight out of a carnival sideshow. The people he’s making money for love him. Everyone else is gawking at him and wondering if it’s an act or if he’s really that big a cocksucking douchebag piece of shit in real life. 
 

Baker really is a cocksucking douchebag piece of shit in real life. Not sure why his parents chose to name him after a vocation, (I’m guessing a lot of alcohol was involved) but “Plumber” would have been a more appropriate name. Dude is one gigantic turd. 

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ChiTownDoc

ChiTownDoc 21144

Posted
Posted

Lol.  Dude sucks but gonna get 100M contract or franchise tag and 37M guaranteed.  Colt would dream of that.  
Just went from career backup to top 15 starter.  Hell of a turn around.  But yes, he sucks…just so we are clear.  
Browns.  Lol

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ChiTownDoc

ChiTownDoc 21144

Posted
Posted
1 minute ago, Tex Pete said:

None of us look to Vince as anything other than a transcendent football player and a great Longhorn. He’s never been an unrepentant douche. 
 

Baker Mayfield has always been something straight out of a carnival sideshow. The people he’s making money for love him. Everyone else is gawking at him and wondering if it’s an act or if he’s really that big a cocksucking douchebag piece of shit in real life. 
 

Baker really is a cocksucking douchebag piece of shit in real life. Not sure why his parents chose to name him after a vocation, (I’m guessing a lot of alcohol was involved) but “Plumber” would have been a more appropriate name. Dude is one gigantic turd. 

Vince is a badass.  Any Sooner would admit that.  Just no genius with his funds.  No shame there.  
And see above…

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Posted
Posted
53 minutes ago, ChiTownDoc said:

Lol.  Dude sucks but gonna get 100M contract or franchise tag and 37M guaranteed.  Colt would dream of that.  
Just went from career backup to top 15 starter.  Hell of a turn around.  But yes, he sucks…just so we are clear.  
Browns.  Lol

No kidding. I'm sure the guy wants to win, but in the end, this isn't so bad:

sad woody harrelson GIF

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wood

wood 11225

Posted
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9 hours ago, jofus said:

 

 


INTer Mayfield strikes again

 

LMAO at the response there, comparing him to VY in the playoffs ... 'cause yeah, those things are, like, totally the same. The Bucs coaches did everything they could to minimize BM's weaknesses and emphasize his strengths. VY got the polar opposite treatment from his 'coaches'. 

Baker has had Mike Evans & OBJ. VY had ... Kenny Britt? Lavelle Hawkins?

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Tex Pete

Tex Pete 20337

Posted
Posted
3 hours ago, ChiTownDoc said:

Vince is a badass.  Any Sooner would admit that.  Just no genius with his funds.  No shame there.  
And see above…

Vince didn't have a dad. It impacted his life in many ways. He was a badass on the field and excelled when he had coaches who supported him, encouraged him, and showed him the way. But they didn't manage his money for him.

Baker similarly seems to have been misguided off the field, but he's had a lot of help on it.

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wood

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Posted
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16 minutes ago, Tex Pete said:

Vince didn't have a dad. It impacted his life in many ways. He was a badass on the field and excelled when he had coaches who supported him, encouraged him, and showed him the way. But they didn't manage his money for him.

Not only that, but VY was led astray, even stolen from iirc, by some male family members who he trusted. I guess that's something VY and Baker have in common. VY does seem to be doing well now though, which is nice to see.

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Jkwellborn

Jkwellborn 6692

Posted
Posted
Not only that, but VY was led astray, even stolen from iirc, by some male family members who he trusted. I guess that's something VY and Baker have in common. VY does seem to be doing well now though, which is nice to see.

Pretty sure it was his uncle/agent that fucked him over.
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PsychMike

PsychMike 1546

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, Tex Pete said:

Vince didn't have a dad. It impacted his life in many ways. He was a badass on the field and excelled when he had coaches who supported him, encouraged him, and showed him the way. But they didn't manage his money for him.

Baker similarly seems to have been misguided off the field, but he's had a lot of help on it.

His surrogate dad/father figure Steve McNair was traded away from the Titans before VY could get there. And he was killed three years later. So his support system crumbled in parallel to his difficulty with "Coach 7-9."

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wood

wood 11225

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28 minutes ago, PsychMike said:

His surrogate dad/father figure Steve McNair was traded away from the Titans before VY could get there. And he was killed three years later. So his support system crumbled in parallel to his difficulty with "Coach 7-9."

Yeah McNair was locked out of the facilities by Shitbag, just in time to keep him from mentoring VY. Big red flag for VY right from the very beginning.

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Valmy77

Valmy77 13225

Posted
Posted (edited)
6 hours ago, ChiTownDoc said:

Lol.  Dude sucks but gonna get 100M contract or franchise tag and 37M guaranteed.  Colt would dream of that.  
Just went from career backup to top 15 starter.  Hell of a turn around.  But yes, he sucks…just so we are clear.  
Browns.  Lol

He doesn't suck.

But I love to see him fail. And he fails often. I hope he did a little dance, grabbed his crotch, and whined about haters while he did it.

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ChiTownDoc

ChiTownDoc 21144

Posted
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32 minutes ago, Valmy77 said:

He doesn't suck.

But I love to see him fail. And he fails often. I hope he did a little dance, grabbed his crotch, and whined about haters while he did it.

He’s a Sooner.  We all suck, by law.  And yes he brings that on himself.  His teammates love him though.  As someone said above, 100M fixes a lot of problems.  

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TreatyOak

TreatyOak 16311

Posted
Posted (edited)
3 hours ago, wood said:

Yeah that's what I was thinking. Gave him bad advice and then took millions from him iirc.

Even though I still have PTSD from Baker's games vs Westlake, I feel bad for him in one regard.

Both VY and Baker are similar in that they both were screwed financially by relatives.

SIAP, but Baker is currently suing his father's company which has somehow lost (stole) $12 million of his money.

Baker's dad and his uncle are partners in two financial companies and can't explain what happened to the money. It's not suspicious at all. 

Vince got taken to the cleaners by his idiot uncle and some dodgy investors. As you know, VY somehow lost $27 million in guaranteed money. How is that even possible? It got so bad that creditors would wait for Vince to get on the Buffalo Bill's practice field and then try to speak to him about his debt. The Bills decided he was too much of a distraction and cut him.

    
 

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wood

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28 minutes ago, TreatyOak said:

Even though I still have PTSD from Baker's games vs Westlake, I feel bad for him in one regard.

Both VY and Baker are similar in that they both were screwed financially by relatives.

SIAP, but Baker is currently suing his father's company which has somehow lost (stole) $12 million of his money.

Baker's dad and his uncle are partners in two financial companies and can't explain what happened to the money. It's not suspicious at all. 

Vince got taken to the cleaners by his idiot uncle and some dodgy investors. As you know, VY somehow lost $27 million in guaranteed money. How is that even possible? It got so bad that creditors would wait for Vince to get on the Buffalo Bill's practice field and then try to speak to him about his debt. The Bills decided he was too much of a distraction and cut him.

Yep, that's what I meant above when I said that was the one thing they had in common. And as I recall he had the best stats of all the Bills QBs that preseason before he was cut. But what kinda shitty security do the Bills have if bill collectors could just walk up to players on the practice field?

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TreatyOak

TreatyOak 16311

Posted
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8 minutes ago, wood said:

Yep, that's what I meant above when I said that was the one thing they had in common. 

I figured.

Calling VY's uncle an idiot was wrong on my part. I apologize. 
Low-rent criminal idiot would have been better. My bad. 

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dec3169

dec3169 501

Posted
Posted
4 hours ago, Not a cat said:

Is there any way we could get a weekly betting guide from helobious?  I'd gladly pay for a list of his top 3 or 4 picks every week.

Has anyone seen Helobious and Jim Cramer been in the same room together?

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'stache

'stache 21797

Posted
Posted
1 minute ago, tbone_ said:

Wait, I did not know that Baker got ripped off for $12M. I wouldn’t wish that on my worst enemy, or even on an asswipe like him. That sucks.

Fuck him. He’s Johnny Manziel with slightly more focus. 

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