Sark after dark COACHING STAFF thread

[LTtxfan 48985]

10 minutes ago, jinx said:

What isn't attractive about signing a guaranteed 2 or 3 year contract and only working one?  Gotta think Yurcich and Ash are pretty good right now.

Gotta believe a reduced buyout on the $3.4mill still owed Yurcich was accomplished so he could take the Penn State OC job.

Only 1yr left at $800k owed Ash...

 

Edited January 12, 2021 by LTtxfan

[FloridaHorn 4735]

1 minute ago, BurntOrange&White said:

It's quite obviously Dennis Simmons accepting. Coleman will be TE's/Inside WR's.

 

so Robert Griffin III as the second part of our S&C team with Becton.

[NTVTXN 1432]

24 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

36 minutes ago, NTVTXN said:

10years or so...🙁😖😣😡🤬

11 years.

🙄

[BurntOrange&White 39667]

Just now, FloridaHorn said:

so Robert Griffin III as the second part of our S&C team with Becton.

Analyst role for conditioning, his past track experience should help here.

[Lonestar4.8 68]

1 minute ago, FloridaHorn said:

so Robert Griffin III as the second part of our S&C team with Becton.

He's had enough rehab to know some good stretches and exercises

[BornOrange 1441]

1 hour ago, closetohumping said:

If anyone is at bergstrom can you please page bo Pellini?

If you really want to get stir things up, page Charlie Strong.

[SubliminalHorn 6675]

1 hour ago, Tex-19 said:

At this point, why not just keep Ash for another year. I think he'd do well but if he doesn't you just replace him next year when Boom is ready to coach again or someone like Odom is open to moving on. Defense got a lot better throughout the year which makes sense given no real offseason

So fucking tired of us just saying, welp let's just roll with it this year and see if it works, if not, we'll replace them. Meanwhile ou wins another conference championship. Hire the best possible now and quit fucking around.

[HtownHorn 14491]

I heard Robert Griffin will be the secondary coach, fulfilling Mack's vision of his true ability.

[bigup2dahorns 3343]

The 4pm press conference is posted on the official website and says it will be carried on LHN. We can do a separate thread for it later

https://texassports.com/

Ok separate thread started for the press conference for later today . . .

[DanTheHorn 4902]

1 hour ago, closetojumping said:

Ahead of posting, one good rule of thumb we should all follow is asking ourselves, "Is this just word soup in my head focused on my own feelings that no one else gives a shit about, or do I really have something that needs to be typed out and posted, at length, on a board with a bunch of anonymous other posters who quite often don't give one fuck about how anyone else 'feels'."

James Joyce wants to have a word with you.

[Mantis Toboggan, MD 1499]

I heard Robert Griffin will be the secondary coach, fulfilling Mack's vision of his true ability.

Johnny Manziel is available too. Co-DB corches

[Huckleberry 32704]

1 hour ago, BurntOrange&White said:

I think Sark already has a good idea of who he wants and who is the DC. 995ers don't know shit and I'd bet $1 that it's an out of left field candidate. 

Did you see how happy Saban looked last night? That was the look of a man who's done with the pressure of being a head coach and is getting on a plane in the morning to go be a defensive coordinator.

Edited January 12, 2021 by Huckleberry

[Droopy 2624]

1 hour ago, Armybrat said:

Did you notice his stand in parts his hair on the opposite side?

A very keen eye for someone so... experienced as yourself. 😉 But the idea of the stand in is not to be a mirror image of the person they are standing in for either. Chevy Chase's stand in is also in the shot but wearing different clothes than Chase is in that scene. That movie and how it got made is a pretty interesting story. I know an acquaintance that was in it. Now back to our new coach and staff!! 🤘 

[clapclapclap 9000]

29 minutes ago, FloridaHorn said:

Nahlin keeps shitting on Milwee's recruiting chops, when the only point of reference is his time at Akron, as if Nahlin was somehow intimately involved with the Zips program. He wasn't, and here's a newsflash for you....recruiting to Akron is a bit tougher than recruiting to Texas.

Is it?  They must have a hell of a budget, I hear those Zips Recruiter ads on the radio all the time.

[jinx 2635]

25 minutes ago, closetohumping said:

Re Milwee, how do you judge someone's recruiting at Akron?  Or Toledo?  You're likely getting sloppy fifths after the Big ten cleans up.  Let's be honest, Milwee looks like an introverted dweeb herego, lazy journalists and surly mouth breathers say "he's really intelligent, studies a lot, but not much of a recruiter."

I mean, based on his haircut alone I would guess he isn't a good recruiter.  Maybe I should start a 9.95 site too.

[Vito Andolini 9113]

2 minutes ago, clapclapclap said:

Is it?  They must have a hell of a budget, I hear those Zips Recruiter ads on the radio all the time.

Indeed.

[runthebone 7932]

Moneywhipping (aka overpaying) has often not worked because it has only been employed by a desperate, shitty HC entering what is certain to be his last year before being fired.  I don't think we've tried it year 1 because our last two coaches brought along buddies who would be happy to be paid in Little Debbies.

[40acredropout 2902]

2 hours ago, NTVTXN said:

I won’t be back in Austin until Friday am, as my oldest wants to check out The Castilian for housing this Fall (<damn right it’s “humblebrag”, I’m damn proud of her (no pics!) as she made it in to McCombs)/ Anyway unless they take the scenic route, I’ll miss them by about 84 hours...Next Man Up! 

You sure you want to see where she's gonna be getting railed?

[bigup2dahorns 3343]

Update: the plane from Opa-locka FL lands AUS at 10:41am

[DoobieWah 1412]

And take lots of pics of the room, especially the curtains and ceiling fan.

We need to be able to compare it to the suspect OnlyFans vids later in the semester. 

 

 

Thank God I never had a daughter.

[Reynolds Woodcock 4670]

57 minutes ago, Hiphopopotamos said:

Nahlin said as much a couple days ago when posters were trying to decipher his 'code' - f they knew who the hire was they would let the site know - even if they didn't 'report' it.  But they don't.

I mean - if the hire hasn't been made and Sark is still interviewing guys - what should the sites be reporting? 

Nahlin just has a bit of a Tom Herman problem. He is an unlikeable asshole, so when looks like a fool, people (myself included) are ready for the dog pile. 

[CHIEF 5072]

I hope they got everybody's sizes since they didn't even stop back by Tuscaloosa and let them pack some clothes.

CHIEF

[WinningIsHard 4017]

10 hours ago, clapclapclap said:

Bandera?

Never thought I'd see that come up on Surly, I'm from there lol. For many years I spent way to much fucking time telling people where bandera was located when they asked where I was from but it's much more popular now. In hindsight I should have just said san antonio but I'm a mean stubborn bastard....even surly one could say. 

[derpyhorndog 2554]

Was scanning flights in and out of Columbia, SC for shits and gigs and stumbled across Lou Holtz's plane. Not suggesting it's involved in our coaching search, just funny that of the many, many planes I've looked into is the first one that is directly tied to an actual "coach" and it's Lou fucking Holtz. And apparently he (or his lawyers) don't give a shit if people know it's his because they certainly don't do much to hide it like most (didn't take much digging to confirm). 

[DoobieWah 1412]

4 minutes ago, WinningIsHard said:

Never thought I'd see that come up on Surly, I'm from there lol.

It's famous here for never having Longhorn game coverage back in the ... 90's?

It was always excluded and pretty much the only place in Texas that was.

It became a running joke.

Edited January 12, 2021 by DoobieWah

[FloridaHorn 4735]

5 minutes ago, derpyhorndog said:

Was scanning flights in and out of Columbia, SC for shits and gigs and stumbled across Lou Holtz's plane. Not suggesting it's involved in our coaching search, just funny that of the many, many planes I've looked into is the first one that is directly tied to an actual "coach" and it's Lou fucking Holtz. And apparently he (or his lawyers) don't give a shit if people know it's his because they certainly don't do much to hide it like most (didn't take much digging to confirm). 

Is it a Cesthna?

[Rimbo 25786]

1 hour ago, closetojumping said:

Ahead of posting, one good rule of thumb we should all follow is asking ourselves, "Is this just word soup in my head focused on my own feelings that no one else gives a shit about, or do I really have something that needs to be typed out and posted, at length, on a board with a bunch of anonymous other posters who quite often don't give one fuck about how anyone else 'feels'."

you must be new here...

[Bevo 13527]

Got a super secret text. You heard it here first. Our next DC is Nick Saban. He has grown tired of head coaching and wants a step down in job requirements. He may only give us a couple of years and he hasn't been a DC in a long, long time. But, I think he is pretty capable.

[squeegeedegg 723]

Sure, why not

[DanTheHorn 4902]

2 minutes ago, Bevo said:

Got a super secret text. You heard it here first. Our next DC is Nick Saban. He has grown tired of head coaching and wants a step down in job requirements. He may only give us a couple of years and he hasn't been a DC in a long, long time. But, I think he is pretty capable.

[Gut Wagon 8053]

10 minutes ago, WinningIsHard said:

Never thought I'd see that come up on Surly, I'm from there lol. For many years I spent way to much fucking time telling people where bandera was located when they asked where I was from but it's much more popular now. In hindsight I should have just said san antonio but I'm a mean stubborn bastard....even surly one could say. 

I'd much rather be from Bandera than SA. Even with all the oak wilt.

[derpyhorndog 2554]

2 minutes ago, FloridaHorn said:

Is it a Cesthna?

He really had his eye on a Dethhault Falcon but couldn't afford it. 

[JesusSweatDuck 17780]

4 minutes ago, Bevo said:

Got a super secret text. You heard it here first. Our next DC is Nick Saban. He has grown tired of head coaching and wants a step down in job requirements. He may only give us a couple of years and he hasn't been a DC in a long, long time. But, I think he is pretty capable.

I heard his wife is looking for houses.  Someone should page in at ABIA

 

(now that we go that out of the way)

[SDG 3319]

17 minutes ago, bigup2dahorns said:

Update: the plane from Opa-locka FL lands AUS at 10:41am

Should we assume he’s meeting the team in person prior to the media?  What time would that be?   

[Rimbo 25786]

30 minutes ago, BornOrange said:

If you really want to get stir things up, page Charlie Strong.

Shawn Watson.

[Bevo 13527]

4 minutes ago, DanTheHorn said:

Dude, the text came from a managed deer lease.

[thunderlounge 7759]

2 hours ago, ClubWhatever said:

Is he sitting or standing?

To pee?

 

 

2 hours ago, alphahorn said:

He's gonna play a 4-0-7

 

I disagree. New scheme is going to be a 5-1-2, with 3 scramblers that the opposing offense will never have a clue where they are going to be. 

[Bamboozled73 315]

Belichik(sp)-DC and Saban-cornerback.  You heard it here first. 
 

[bigup2dahorns 3343]

Should we assume he’s meeting the team in person prior to the media?  What time would that be?   

Classes begin Jan 19 according to the Internets. Most of the team are not around campus now.

[Js1 85116]

6 minutes ago, SDG said:

Should we assume he’s meeting the team in person prior to the media?  What time would that be?   

Gotta go get fitted for a burnt orange jacket and tie from the Co-Op. 

[Tex Long 4348]

Saban is not coming here as DC. Anyone who thinks that is completely shitful.

Saban is going to be our Assistant AD for Football. Mark it down.

[Bevo14 8274]

2 minutes ago, Js1 said:

Gotta go get fitted for a burnt orange jacket and tie from the Co-Op. 

They have some pretty snazzy ties at the Co-Op. I ran over there and picked one up for 10 bucks on the day of graduation.

[Happy Gilmore 1001]

21 minutes ago, derpyhorndog said:

Was scanning flights in and out of Columbia, SC for shits and gigs and stumbled across Lou Holtz's plane. Not suggesting it's involved in our coaching search, just funny that of the many, many planes I've looked into is the first one that is directly tied to an actual "coach" and it's Lou fucking Holtz. And apparently he (or his lawyers) don't give a shit if people know it's his because they certainly don't do much to hide it like most (didn't take much digging to confirm). 

[ATLLonghorn 841]

10 minutes ago, SDG said:

Should we assume he’s meeting the team in person prior to the media?  What time would that be?   

Nah, Zoom chat. 

[Sal 1088]

6 minutes ago, Bamboozled73 said:

Belichik(sp)-DC and Saban-cornerback.  You heard it here first. 
 

Belichick (Google)

[FloridaHorn 4735]

11 minutes ago, SDG said:

Should we assume he’s meeting the team in person prior to the media?  What time would that be?   

Probably not. He is going to have a few cocktails to calm his nerves before the PC.

[Fud 9546]

One poster breaks the seal with a terribly unfunny post, and many more follow 

[jinx 2635]

41 minutes ago, bigup2dahorns said:

Ok separate thread started for the press conference for later today . . .

Good!  We all know how important it will be to break down every word to parse it for future national championships.  Can't clutter up this thread with that info.

[Laxtonto 11934]

5 minutes ago, Tex Long said:

Saban is not coming here as DC. Anyone who thinks that is completely shitful.

Saban is going to be our Assistant AD for Football. Mark it down.

[Fud 9546]

Anwar's first update in about 20 hours

"We've reached the point where the names from last week are doing job interviews elsewhere. It feels like the most obvious answers at this point are the names that aren't it."