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Sark after dark COACHING STAFF thread

closetohumping

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Posted by Teryor,

HOLY SHIT WE'RE ROOTING FOR BRIAN FUCKING DAVIS TO BE RIGHT
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Sheep Have Wool
Sheep Have Wool

https://www.captiongenerator.com/2107502/SurlyHorns-Reacts-to-the-Coaching-Search Enable subtitles if you're watching embedded.  

closetojumping
closetojumping

Just got a text from my friend in the Bama program that Flood and Wiggins are going with Sark. It's done.

2578
2578

nope, reposding to other posters. You want an asshole? I'll show you an asshole I'm gonna lose to OU THIS many times   Texas fucking sucks now, and you ALLLLLLL know it. Good

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fakepunt

fakepunt 14

Posted
Posted
1 minute ago, RGBIII said:

Fuck you for not knowing how to link things. Then fuck you for being vague enough for me to click more links. But thank you for your input, or at least I will thank you once I figure out what the fuck you meant

Sorry.  I’m a long time lurker who found it interesting, so decided to sign up.

Sark & Banks bio lead to NC game info.. but the rest of the staff had bio info.

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fakepunt

fakepunt 14

Posted
Posted
1 minute ago, South Austin said:

Have you gone through the mandatory three-year waiting period before posting?

I called the hotline and Suzanne Halliburton said it was ok to post frivolous bullshit as long as Cory Redding was moved to linebacker living in an orange house.

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RGBIII

RGBIII 23009

Posted
Posted
6 minutes ago, Kurt Bowels said:

To be fair, he doesn't need to read the sites with the peasants. He talks to THE 247 team moderators.

I'm Kind of a Big Deal - Reaction GIFs

“Hey Taylor, hear anything about Arnett?”

”who are you? Why are you breathing so heavily? I’m calling the police”

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closetojumping

closetojumping 65245

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56 minutes ago, BurntOrange&White said:

I was hoping we’d see some official staff releases today. 

Me too. Surprised we didn’t. I mean, I’m blown away that the entire staff wasn’t announced last night just before the game to make the biggest splash, but nothing as of now is also a surprise. 

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ClubWhatever

ClubWhatever 12276

Posted
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On 1/11/2021 at 5:09 PM, Longtimelurker2001 said:

CDC and brass going to the game tonight.   They have a private plane that will bring back Flood, Wiggins and Golding.  Scott may be on the plane as well.  Coaching staff will be in Austin tomorrow and will he announced. 

 

Yeah...so this wasn’t so right

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HateYouAndMyself

HateYouAndMyself 828

Posted
Posted
4 minutes ago, ClubWhatever said:

Yeah...so this wasn’t so right

Did anyone go into the plane afterwards to confirm it was empty? Maybe Golding, Wiggins and Flood are hiding in the bathroom waiting for the right moment to spring themselves upon Austin. 

 

(that guy had called the Sark hiring like on Dec 20th so I was somewhat hopeful that MAYBE he wasn't absolutely full of shit when he posted the airplane thing but looks like it was just BS guesswork as expected) 

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RGBIII

RGBIII 23009

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Posted

We do need to talk about the fact the the DC absolutely is not Golding. No way we wouldn’t have heard shit on him by now if he was the DC. Man I thought inside texas was going to have the juice with all the coaching search but they are absolutely grasping at straws. I think they got in with the BMDs more than the admin and aren’t getting fed shit at this point, while lap dog FCB is just being hand fed by CDC. What a strange turn of events

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Rockwell Torrey

Rockwell Torrey 1364

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1 minute ago, HateYouAndMyself said:

Did anyone go into the plane afterwards to confirm it was empty? Maybe Golding, Wiggins and Flood are hiding in the bathroom waiting for the right moment to spring themselves upon Austin. 

 

(that guy had called the Sark hiring like on Dec 20th so I was somewhat hopeful that MAYBE he wasn't absolutely full of shit when he posted the airplane thing but looks like it was just BS guesswork as expected) 

Turns out Golding and Wiggins hid in the aircraft’s wheel well. It is believed they fell out somewhere in North Florida.  

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maninblack

maninblack 7975

Posted
Posted
We do need to talk about the fact the the DC absolutely is not Golding. No way we wouldn’t have heard shit on him by now if he was the DC. Man I thought inside texas was going to have the juice with all the coaching search but they are absolutely grasping at straws. I think they got in with the BMDs more than the admin and aren’t getting fed shit at this point, while lap dog FCB is just being hand fed by CDC. What a strange turn of events

Moving targets and I also think things are staying bottled up as much as possible.
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TexasEx

TexasEx 1697

Posted
Posted
23 minutes ago, fakepunt said:

Nevermind.  I suck.  It appears to be random ads or something.. 

I saw the same thing, but it looks like it’s just an advertisement related to their national championship. I didn’t realize Banks had only been there three years so that’s something. 

Welcome aboard. That’s your one mulligan. Next time you fuck up you’ll wake up at midnight with @futureman doing things you’d never imagine in your worst nightmare. 

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The Ghost of Hau Pham

The Ghost of Hau Pham 41

Posted
Posted
Eagles' SPARQ score was very similar to that of Rondale Moore
Excellent display name btw

Thanks for the compliment, I dunno how many people would get it because I’m a bit of a surly young myself.

Wow, Rondale Moore... another “what-if” scenario. I suppose that’s the point of bringing in Sark, though: to hedge a bet on a staff that we hope is competent at recruiting, retaining, and developing players.

Did we ever really think that Dipshit Mehringer was going to teach our wide receivers something remotely of value?

cfb8d3c6674701100f0c1fadb1335ee5.jpg

I really do hope CTJ is right on Wiggins. The evolution of TXHSFB and the popularity of 7-on-7 camps has helped wide receiver talent in Texas explode. The thought of a Texas staff using Devonta Smith as a recruiting pitch, having their pick of the litter, and then actually developing the studs that come in is almost too good to be true...
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Happy Gilmore

Happy Gilmore 1004

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Posted
11 minutes ago, RGBIII said:

We do need to talk about the fact the the DC absolutely is not Golding. No way we wouldn’t have heard shit on him by now if he was the DC. Man I thought inside texas was going to have the juice with all the coaching search but they are absolutely grasping at straws. I think they got in with the BMDs more than the admin and aren’t getting fed shit at this point, while lap dog FCB is just being hand fed by CDC. What a strange turn of events

Pretty funny really. FCB gets a 'redemption tour' but still fuck chip brown. Nahlin and Co. Look like dipshits. Meanwhile Fat Ketch is just sitting in the corner eating his tub of ice cream watching it all go down. 

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closetohumping

closetohumping 17776

Posted
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Posted (edited)
14 minutes ago, Happy Gilmore said:

Pretty funny really. FCB gets a 'redemption tour' but still fuck chip brown. Nahlin and Co. Look like dipshits. Meanwhile Fat Ketch is just sitting in the corner eating his tub of ice cream watching it all go down. 

Ketch's site used to have more members then all of the sites combined. Maybe still does.  Most of the posters hate him though.

 

Saw on one of the FB groups that this dude's friend works at a hotel and UT had 5 rooms  booked.  Sark, Bo, Gideon, Flood and Wiggins?

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CHIEF

CHIEF 5201

Posted
Posted
9 minutes ago, closetohumping said:

Ketch's site used to have more members then all of the sites combined. Maybe still does.  Most of the posters hate him though.

 

Saw on one of the FB groups that this dude's friend works at a hotel and UT had 5 rooms  booked.  Sark, Bo, Gideon, Flood and Wiggins?

Please tell me it is the AT&T Center, and that porky little bride on the LHN commercial is playing the "Eyes" with her arm pit.

CHIEF

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touchthemonolith

touchthemonolith 654

Posted
Posted

Semi-serious question: Is there anyone on the Texas football beat that surly doesn't have a hate boner for? I get the hate for FCB because, well, fuck him, but in the past few days I've read that Taylor Estes is a useless bitch, Mike Roach is a fucking hack who doesn't know the first thing about recruiting, Cedric Golden, Brian Davis, and Kirk Bohls are incompetent assclowns who just makes shit up, etc. I'm frankly not informed enough to have an opinion one way or the other, but I'm curious if there's anyone that isn't universally loathed.

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closetohumping

closetohumping 17776

Posted
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Posted (edited)
11 minutes ago, touchthemonolith said:

Semi-serious question: Is there anyone on the Texas football beat that surly doesn't have a hate boner for? I get the hate for FCB because, well, fuck him, but in the past few days I've read that Taylor Estes is a useless bitch, Mike Roach is a fucking hack who doesn't know the first thing about recruiting, Cedric Golden, Brian Davis, and Kirk Bohls are incompetent assclowns who just makes shit up, etc. I'm frankly not informed enough to have an opinion one way or the other, but I'm curious if there's anyone that isn't universally loathed.

I don't hate Gerry Hamilton.  I think.  Actually, let me rephrase.  If I saw Gerry at Kerbey Lane, I'd likely not say something snide about his mother.

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texifornia

texifornia 58781

Posted
Posted
3 minutes ago, touchthemonolith said:

Semi-serious question: Is there anyone on the Texas football beat that surly doesn't have a hate boner for? I get the hate for FCB because, well, fuck him, but in the past few days I've read that Taylor Estes is a useless bitch, Mike Roach is a fucking hack who doesn't know the first thing about recruiting, Cedric Golden, Brian Davis, and Kirk Bohls are incompetent assclowns who just makes shit up, etc. I'm frankly not informed enough to have an opinion one way or the other, but I'm curious if there's anyone that isn't universally loathed.

 

1 minute ago, closetohumping said:

I don't hate Gerry Hamilton.  I think.

Yeah pretty much just Gerry

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b_p

b_p 451

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Posted
7 hours ago, Hornlover said:

That's the old formula. The new formula is:

Take half your age, multiply times two, subtract your age, plus 18 . It gets the correct answer every time.

Half your age, divide by 2, add 7, and round to the nearest teen. 

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TexasEx

TexasEx 1697

Posted
Posted
7 minutes ago, touchthemonolith said:

Semi-serious question: Is there anyone on the Texas football beat that surly doesn't have a hate boner for? I get the hate for FCB because, well, fuck him, but in the past few days I've read that Taylor Estes is a useless bitch, Mike Roach is a fucking hack who doesn't know the first thing about recruiting, Cedric Golden, Brian Davis, and Kirk Bohls are incompetent assclowns who just makes shit up, etc. I'm frankly not informed enough to have an opinion one way or the other, but I'm curious if there's anyone that isn't universally loathed.

No

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Mitch Cumsteen

Mitch Cumsteen 18913

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Posted
9 minutes ago, touchthemonolith said:

Semi-serious question: Is there anyone on the Texas football beat that surly doesn't have a hate boner for? I get the hate for FCB because, well, fuck him, but in the past few days I've read that Taylor Estes is a useless bitch, Mike Roach is a fucking hack who doesn't know the first thing about recruiting, Cedric Golden, Brian Davis, and Kirk Bohls are incompetent assclowns who just makes shit up, etc. I'm frankly not informed enough to have an opinion one way or the other, but I'm curious if there's anyone that isn't universally loathed.

I'm sorry you must have meant to log on to peaceloveandunderstandinghorns.com

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UncleSonny

UncleSonny 6790

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Posted
1 minute ago, UncleSonny said:

I don’t specifically hate Joe Cook, maybe because he doesn’t really pretend to be a reporter. His Twitter threads of plays are games are good. 

Or maybe I should say, he doesn’t pretend to be more than a reporter? Doesn’t seem to act like he knows everything or that he’s got super plugged in secret sources. 

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RGBIII

RGBIII 23009

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10 minutes ago, touchthemonolith said:

Semi-serious question: Is there anyone on the Texas football beat that surly doesn't have a hate boner for? I get the hate for FCB because, well, fuck him, but in the past few days I've read that Taylor Estes is a useless bitch, Mike Roach is a fucking hack who doesn't know the first thing about recruiting, Cedric Golden, Brian Davis, and Kirk Bohls are incompetent assclowns who just makes shit up, etc. I'm frankly not informed enough to have an opinion one way or the other, but I'm curious if there's anyone that isn't universally loathed.

@OnAComputer has been called the Texas Taylor Hamm (at least I like to say that to fuck with him). TFB in general are really good dudes and are great at the recruiting beat

The IT guys are likeable enough but seem to be scrambling currently. I really like Gerry and Burton 

I would love to get a beer and eat wings with Mike Roach, he’s a good dude and is getting a lot better at his reporting. Jeff Howe and the longhorn blitz guys are great. The rest of 247 can get fucked

Every single person at OB can get fucked to the highest level 

I will not mention the AAS because they are irrelevant and awful

 

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Getafix

Getafix 29374

Posted
Posted
16 minutes ago, touchthemonolith said:

Semi-serious question: Is there anyone on the Texas football beat that surly doesn't have a hate boner for? I get the hate for FCB because, well, fuck him, but in the past few days I've read that Taylor Estes is a useless bitch, Mike Roach is a fucking hack who doesn't know the first thing about recruiting, Cedric Golden, Brian Davis, and Kirk Bohls are incompetent assclowns who just makes shit up, etc. I'm frankly not informed enough to have an opinion one way or the other, but I'm curious if there's anyone that isn't universally loathed.

 

1) Porta potty girl

2) Squid

3) Uber driver

4) Caddox

5) Chow's 7-11 guy

6) Rapgamelarry

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closetohumping

closetohumping 17776

Posted
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Posted
1 minute ago, RGBIII said:

@OnAComputer has been called the Texas Taylor Hamm (at least I like to say that to fuck with him). TFB in general are really good dudes and are great at the recruiting beat

The IT guys are likeable enough but seem to be scrambling currently. I really like Gerry and Burton 

I would love to get a beer and eat wings with Mike Roach, he’s a good dude and is getting a lot better at his reporting. Jeff Howe and the longhorn blitz guys are great. The rest of 247 can get fucked

Every single person at OB can get fucked to the highest level 

I will not mention the AAS because they are irrelevant and awful

 

I don't disagree with most of this.  Gerry seems like an ok guy, Burton is like the godfather of football boards to me.  Wells is ok.  Nahlin, I actually know him, he's smart, but way too brash and hungry.

 

don't really know Howe, don't mind Roach as he seems to be pretty down to earth.  Chip and Taylor can get fucked by some syphillis infested vampires for all I care.  Everyone at OB, save Mccomas can get fucked too.  

 

So basically Gerry and maybe Roach.

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Post Oak

Post Oak 20551

Posted
Posted
18 minutes ago, touchthemonolith said:

Semi-serious question: Is there anyone on the Texas football beat that surly doesn't have a hate boner for? I get the hate for FCB because, well, fuck him, but in the past few days I've read that Taylor Estes is a useless bitch, Mike Roach is a fucking hack who doesn't know the first thing about recruiting, Cedric Golden, Brian Davis, and Kirk Bohls are incompetent assclowns who just makes shit up, etc. I'm frankly not informed enough to have an opinion one way or the other, but I'm curious if there's anyone that isn't universally loathed.

You're gonna have to lose that if you're gonna make it hear.  Reason is never imported.  Hate is the always exported.

 

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Laxtonto

Laxtonto 13013

Posted
Posted

So we announced a new HC today and the only legit news about the staff was from our own CTJ confirming Flood, Wiggins, and Milwee from his Bama contacts?

 

Yeah, the 9.95 brigade is completely in the dark and it looks like one has an in with Sark and co...

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LTtxfan

LTtxfan 49908

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, The Ghost of Hau Pham said:

Did we ever really think that Dipshit Mehringer was going to teach our wide receivers something remotely of value?

cfb8d3c6674701100f0c1fadb1335ee5.jpg

 

Fyi... sometimes fact is funnier than fiction 😁

FAU: Bruce Feldman tweets that Michael Johnson, who was on Willie Taggart’s staff at Oregon and coached the receivers at Mississippi State in 2019, will join the program as co-offensive coordinator / quarterbacks coach, Drew Mehringer will continue to serve as co-offensive coordinator and will move from receivers to tight ends coach and analyst Joey Thomas is being promoted to coach the receivers.

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