Sark after dark COACHING STAFF thread

[Octavian 1,025]

6 minutes ago, Huckleberry said:

Finally we have a head coach who is actually acting like he's the head coach of the Texas fucking Longhorns. 

I mean shit, as long as we've opened up a pipeline from Tuscaloosa to Austin, let's be sure not to close it with the one free transfer coming up. 

Haha if we start taking players on top of coaches, Bama fans are gonna go ballistic.

[touchthemonolith 654]

FUCK THIS STAFF HAS ME HYPED

SARK FINNA START STACKING NATTYS WHILE POUNDING O'DOULS

[Mo Horn 8,933]

6 minutes ago, ClubWhatever said:

I’ve never been to Starkville MS but apparently Zach Arnett thinks it’s a shithole and can’t wait to leave. 

 The fact that it's in Mississippi is reason enough

[Happy Gilmore 1,004]

7 minutes ago, Huckleberry said:

Finally we have a head coach who is actually acting like he's the head coach of the Texas fucking Longhorns. 

I mean shit, as long as we've opened up a pipeline from Tuscaloosa to Austin, let's be sure not to close it with the one free transfer coming up. 

Bryce Young to the Burnt Orange courtesy phone. 

Bama would really shit then. Probably cry foul. 

[Laxtonto 13,013]

from BOL

Quote

From someone close to a staff member;

1) Banks doesn’t care for O’Brian and was hoping Saban would consider him as a replacement to Sark. He went 0-2

2)He decided that if he’s going to stay a position coach... Recruiting Texas kids to Texas and working for Sark is much easier than recruiting Texas kids to Alabama and working for Saban.

 

[JesusSweatDuck 18,045]

@immamac - well done.  @Radical Larry

 

 

[TexasEd 8,248]

7 minutes ago, closetohumping said:

Mouthbreather “so just like herm and Charlie, sarks bringing his buddies got it”

I hope you're not referring to me, I even included the  emogi in my message about giving him a pass for the guys he knew at bama

[Burt Macklin 19,209]

 

 

 

2 hours ago, texifornia said:

He does look less like a Plano-based actuarial assistant manager in this picture

 

he’s got that Coach Cal slicked back hair energy. 

2 hours ago, RGBIII said:

I mean Banks is pretty good but no one is going to acknowledge that we missed out on our #1 TE coach target, Corby Meekins?

Really puts into perspective what a fucking moron Herman is, and how much he wasted his opportunity. 

1 hour ago, closetojumping said:

Yeah, I thought about that. Not sure. Maybe I can find a stand-in that won't embarrass me on the call.

There's hope, but it doesn't sound like much of it left.

There’s a 100% chance I won’t pull a Toobin 50% of the time. 

 

[taybo20 3,008]

Sark is so refreshing already. This staff is turning out to be something special.

[conVINCEd 21,477]

3 minutes ago, Laxtonto said:

from BOL

 

Also $$$$$$$$$$$

[LTtxfan 49,904]

21 minutes ago, LTtxfan said:

FYI:  Sark will be on Cowturd's show this afternoon on FS1 (FOX Radio too)

Update:   will be on in 15 minutes .... on FS1

[Newy25 7,894]

5 minutes ago, Happy Gilmore said:

Bryce Young to the Burnt Orange courtesy phone. 

Bama would really shit then. Probably cry foul. 

As long as we do not pursue those two mother fuckers who’s name I will not mention that play offensive line there. They can get fucked. 

[closetohumping 17,776]

Sark will be on fs1 in 15

[taybo20 3,008]

SIAP, Hutzler removed all Texas info from his Twitter bio. 

[TotallyLegit 3,090]

1 minute ago, taybo20 said:

SIAP, Hutzler removed all Texas info from his Twitter bio. 

What does this indicate? That the new DC will coach LBs?

[Stunns38 3,763]

I’ve never been to Starkville MS but apparently Zach Arnett thinks it’s a shithole and can’t wait to leave. 

Yea, Stark Vegas is awful. Have family there.

[MrPhlegm 3,413]

You sure that's not the Jim Harbaugh to Jordan Elliott Texas cake?

rader. its in jim bouton's ball four

[BachelorTrek 3,263]

20 minutes ago, MoJames said:

Banks is in? What a nice surprise.

Inner Thigh Gap confirmed. LULZ

[Newy25 7,894]

I’m trying not to get caught up in the moment, but I said I would reserve judgement until I see how Sark finished out his staff. Mainly the process he used as opposed to getting married to the idea of one or two specific names. Would he utilize our vast resources and money whip recruiters? Would he hire someone he was not familiar with based on their upside?  We haven’t seen the entire product yet but I’m a lot more excited about this staff than anything we have seen in a long time on the forty. 

[Duane Moore 5,636]

23 minutes ago, ClubWhatever said:

I’ve never been to Starkville MS but apparently Zach Arnett thinks it’s a shithole and can’t wait to leave. 

Widely considered the worst of the SEC college towns/cities. 

[EverywhereMan 50]

There may be two 'O's in goose - but there is only one 'L' in Millwee. @blacklab

[closetohumping 17,776]

1 minute ago, Duane Moore said:

Widely considered the worst of the SEC college towns/cities. 

I think someone said it in this thread. Skip Bertman said Starksville was Indian for Trailer Park.

[Davis Lane 5,972]

Wait.

Jeff Banks is white?

[closetohumping 17,776]

2 minutes ago, Davis Lane said:

Wait.

Jeff Banks is white?

From the waist up.  Allegedly.

[Beantown Express 2.0 6,586]

Can we grab the RB coach from Alabama also while we are at it?  They seem to churn out pretty good running backs.  Kidding.  Kind of.

[Bevo 13,817]

42 minutes ago, taybo20 said:

There’s a new dynasty and its us! 🤘🏼🤘🏼🤘🏼🤘🏼

That's premature.

 

Edited January 14, 2021 by Bevo

[BurntOrange&White 41,633]

5 minutes ago, EverywhereMan said:

There may be two 'O's in goose - but there is only one 'L' in Millwee. @blacklab

You used two L’s

[MrPhlegm 3,413]

Agreed to some extent, although the Washington fans seem to be mocking us for hiring Sark. And so far, Sark seems like a very solid choice. 

they bitched when we hired Royal. fuck em.

[Burt Macklin 19,209]

8 minutes ago, Newy25 said:

I’m trying not to get caught up in the moment, but I said I would reserve judgement until I see how Sark finished out his staff. Mainly the process he used as opposed to getting married to the idea of one or two specific names. Would he utilize our vast resources and money whip recruiters? Would he hire someone he was not familiar with based on their upside?  We haven’t seen the entire product yet but I’m a lot more excited about this staff than anything we have seen in a long time on the forty. 

I feel the same way, but a lot still hinges on the DC hire. That and OL coach are the two most important ones. 

Edited January 14, 2021 by Burt Macklin

[closetojumping 65,238]

4 minutes ago, Davis Lane said:

Wait.

Jeff Banks is white?

 

3 minutes ago, closetohumping said:

From the waist up.  Allegedly.

Allegedly, Taylor Hamm thinks the dude is rolling with a Milton Berle-level hog.

[bigup2dahorns 3,348]

Sark on FS1 now

[closetojumping 65,238]

Our esteemed quickwitted craft beer dork, @HenryJames is taking the Zoom for us tomorrow. We'll check the notes and he or I will post something if there's anything worth a shit to care about from the call.

[Cajun 11,771]

10 minutes ago, Duane Moore said:

Widely considered the worst of the SEC college towns/cities. 

Easily.

It's worse than College Station.

That is not hyperbole.

[Jkwellborn 7,005]

And that's why you won't get any nekkid pictures of me. I am built very similar. Probably too skinny. Not enough boobs. Lol. 

Why can’t we decide these things?

[1leggedduck 443]

Ha, Ha! Paul Finebaum! How's he going to spin it?

[stork642 4,511]

34 minutes ago, MoJames said:

Banks is in? What a nice surprise.

Aren’t those the curtains from Horseshoe Bay?

[stork642 4,511]

DP

Edited January 14, 2021 by stork642

[bigup2dahorns 3,348]

Sark on FS1 “you don’t say no to Texas”

[stork642 4,511]

TP

Edited January 14, 2021 by stork642

[closetohumping 17,776]

5 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

 

Allegedly, Taylor Hamm thinks the dude is rolling with a Milton Berle-level hog.

Of course, safe to say Taylor's twigs and berries are less than manly so who knows.

[Slacks 7,018]

Wait.
Jeff Banks is white?

Who tf else can get a high paying leadership role with an internet stripper and a monkey in tow?

[irishtexan 11,692]

1 minute ago, closetohumping said:

Of course, safe to say Taylor's twigs and berries are less than manly so who knows.

Everyone's Milton Berle when you're working with an acorn.

[Vertigo 20,461]

7 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

 

Allegedly, Taylor Hamm thinks the dude is rolling with a Milton Berle-level hog.

As close as he lives to jockstraps, I would have to consider him an authoritative source. Stripper validated. 

[TexasEx 1,697]

We are witnessing the weaponization of Texas. We've unfurled our Banks-sized wang and will be helicoptering all over the country whipping the best corches and 'croots to Austin. 

[gmr548 16,681]

I just want to know if the average Texas fans is willing to forgive Pruitt of his sins and receive that prodigal son?  Dude is a legit DC.  Why do I get the feeling that Sark is not clear that Texas does not operate on the level of the SEC in terms of how "things" are done.  On the one hand i'm glad but on the other hand its a very new position for the average Texas fan to be in.  The thought of hiring an investigated Pruitt in and of itself will be a new one for the fanbase.  If he is on Sarks list ultimately I can see framing this as his redemption tour under Texas' tight control  but as you throw in Banks I sense the collective set of eyebrows on the scale of judgement start to rise.  Interesting times.      

He’d be a coordinator. He doesn’t influence how the program is run. His hire may be indicative of some philosophical shift, or it may not be, but either way the case would be the same with or without him on staff. So on that sense it’s easy to judge him as just a coordinator hire.

Personally I’m far more concerned that he’s a grown ass man that doesn’t/didn’t know what asparagus is.

[nycHorn 3,123]

That interview made me almost like Cowherd. Sark is great. Easy to see why people like him. It’s a nice change.

[Sgt. Slaughter 2,890]

15 minutes ago, closetohumping said:

From the waist up.  Allegedly.

They don’t call her pole assassin for her dancing skills...

[Armybrat 41,304]

37 minutes ago, touchthemonolith said:

FUCK THIS STAFF HAS ME HYPED

SARK FINNA START STACKING NATTYS WHILE POUNDING O'DOULS

Kindly speaking, please lose the aggy “natty” jargon. Thank you.

[66BUFF 2,608]

43 minutes ago, ClubWhatever said:

I’ve never been to Starkville MS but apparently Zach Arnett thinks it’s a shithole and can’t wait to leave. 

Skip Bertman quotes on Starkville

Everytime I go to Starkville I ask for a room without a view

Starkville is an indian word for trailer park

[Michael Knight 13,187]

Sark looks like he hasn't showered or slept in a couple of days