Sark after dark COACHING STAFF thread

[Chuckie Finster 22694]

 

19 minutes ago, CowtownHorn said:

Ok I’m going to need to see some more consistency in background, suit, and tie colors. Also, pose positions are all wonky. This is not our standard. Time to do a re-shoot.

 

They just photoshopped burnt orange into their previous staff pics. I'm sure there will be a uniform photoshoot soon.

 

[MAUFRAIS 6619]

does gideon got herpes?

also he needs his daddy to teach him to tie a tie again.

Edited January 22, 2021 by MAUFRAIS

[Daichee Bell 2925]

4 minutes ago, MAUFRAIS said:

does gideon got herpes?

Why do you ask? You wanna fuck him?

Edited January 22, 2021 by Daichee Bell

[JPETERMAN 111]

10 minutes ago, MAUFRAIS said:

does gideon got herpes?

Pretty sure those are pancake crumbs

[Texas Flood 1356]

Pretty sure those are pancake crumbs

Grand Slam*

[WinningIsHard 4027]

1 hour ago, Errestaurants said:

Cool story brah! How many times did you edit before hitting send? 

Some asshole who likes to tell people who they shouldn’t marry informed me that you don’t hit send, you submit reply. I figured I’d enlighten you as well. Lol 

[SDG 3319]

Found this while cyber stalking our new coaches.  This is his pinned tweet; notice the dates.

 

Edited January 22, 2021 by SDG
socks..

[CowtownHorn 5126]

1 hour ago, Hornlover said:

Confirmed. Jeff Banks is not only regarded, but he's actually highly-regarded!

[Bevo14 8303]

Good god tell me these stupid fuckers on Horns247 are trolling. A decent number of them were in favor of Stoops and one genius posted about how well he coached the linebackers at OU.

 

Edited January 22, 2021 by Bevo14

[Hornius Emeritus 12450]

I can haz Tosh Lupoi?

[satyanash 14478]

11 minutes ago, SDG said:

Found this while cyber stocking our new coaches.

that's a new one

[closetohumping 17435]

4 minutes ago, Hornius Emeritus said:

I can haz Tosh Lupoi?

Wouldn't that be great?

[TriStone 1724]

3 minutes ago, satyanash said:

that's a new one

Not really.

[SDG 3319]

4 minutes ago, satyanash said:

that's a new one

Well I'm not sophisticated enough to track airplanes.

[ImissWallyPryor 9046]

7 hours ago, HateYouAndMyself said:

I envy the lucky mother fuckers who went to bed before the Mike Stoops news broke and wake up / check the internet after its already been refuted. They will never know the emotional scars us survivors of the ~10 hour 'Mike Stoops LB coach' tenure will carry for the rest of our lives. 

I’m one of those. I had no idea until my son texted me to get my reaction to the meltdown last night. I told him we had already moved on from considering Mike Stoops.

I wish I had been here for the show. Best free entertainment out there. 

[utee94 15808]

[kevwun 15766]

The monkey would be a better LB coach than Mike Stoops.

[hobbs 243]

2 minutes ago, kevwun said:

The monkey would be a better LB coach than Mike Stoops.

The monkey is better than Urban.

[Leanderman 2275]

South Austin's mom would be a better LB coach than stoops.

[Foosters 17842]

26 minutes ago, Bevo14 said:

Good god tell me these stupid fuckers on Horns247 are trolling. A decent number of them were in favor of Stoops and one genius posted about how well he coached the linebackers at OU.

 

I see people still have Teddy Lehman PTSD

[Lou_Sassle 2874]

2 minutes ago, Leanderman said:

South Austin's mom would be a better LB coach than stoops.

Well she does know how to bring a 3 man blitz....

[D_Goose 489]

2 hours ago, Errestaurants said:

Cool story brah! How many times did you edit before hitting send? 

[elfenix 34225]

18 minutes ago, satyanash said:

that's a new one

i once answered "silk stalkings" on a spanish quiz. 

Edited January 22, 2021 by elfenix

[utee94 15808]

1 minute ago, elfenix said:

i once wrote "silk stalkings" for a spanish quiz. 

[Tex Pete 20337]

1 hour ago, Vertigo said:

Shots fired at Mensa

Makes it apparent that it’s one of the things CDC reiterated to Sarkisian in the hiring process. Same with Sark’s repetition of “authentic.” And both were huge sources of consternation with the fanbase with Herman.
 

Glad someone listened. Hope the Stoops furor resonated equally. 

[PTINS 3465]

I have a milestone birthday this year, and had a cardio stress test this morning at 8.  Last thing I did last night was check Surly to see if we had a new coach. About the worst f*%king thing i could have done last night. Yeah, I want some butts!

[Tex Pete 20337]

2 hours ago, PassiveAggressiveCoach said:

I think that is true and not true depending.  They fucked up the Saban hire.

Mack Brown being an entitled, petulant bitch-ass did that. 

[JPETERMAN 111]

18 minutes ago, Leanderman said:

South Austin's mom would be a better LB coach than stoops.

Stoops defensive schemes have more holes than South Austin's mom.

[Tigersnake 670]

4 minutes ago, JPETERMAN said:

Stoops defensive schemes have more holes than South Austin's mom.

Live look at South Austin's mom's hole.

[T-shirt Sip 2097]

22 minutes ago, Leanderman said:

South Austin's mom would be a better LB coach than stoops.

Well yeah. She would show them how to hit those gaps. 

[Burntcowboy 1845]

 

[Waterface 129]

Tebus, for being an epic alcoholic, age adjusted, Sarkisian looks like a spring lamb. Flood has the cancro leopard face, Gideon the sex disease, Milwee the post-timber head barren. No normal faces, and that's ok.

[ausjala 101]

15 hours ago, CHIEF said:

What? Pete Kwaitkowski is our DC, and a quite good one, I might add.

CHIEF

Thanks, I just have never seen that confirmed anywhere. Yet, since I live in Poland, I bet I am among the few that can actually pronounce his name correctly.  You guys make this fun.

[Vertigo 20276]

30 minutes ago, Leanderman said:

South Austin's mom would be a better LB coach than stoops.

She would be fantastic at teaching them to drive their hips. 

[PassiveAggressiveCoach 118]

13 minutes ago, Tex Pete said:

Mack Brown being an entitled, petulant bitch-ass did that. 

partly. he found out because BMDs got involved and leaked shit out.

[closetohumping 17435]

2 minutes ago, Vertigo said:

She would be fantastic at teaching them to drive their hips. 

She's certainly familiar with having a hole filled.

[Waterface 129]

6 minutes ago, ausjala said:

Thanks, I just have never seen that confirmed anywhere. Yet, since I live in Poland, I bet I am among the few that can actually pronounce his name correctly.  You guys make this fun.

Watch out for those pesky Russians. Or Germans. Either way.

[stork642 4498]

3 hours ago, D_Goose said:

I'm personally struggling to be at the excitement level towards Sark right now that I was before last night. 

It feels like I had a banging, stacked, badass chick I just started going out with and then I found out she was texting one of her exes last night and now I have to walk around with her at my Aunt's bday party or something and knowing she's a sneaking little skank whore in my head but faking I'm still just as stoked about her as I was because that's what all my family thinks.

Good god we are such a damaged group.  Hopefully Sark will help us find our collective sacks.  Get your shit together people.  

[Getafix 28568]

1 minute ago, stork642 said:

Good god we are such a damaged group.  Hopefully Sark will help us find our collective sacks.  Get your shit together people.  

 

Says the stork.

To the goose.

[stork642 4498]

1 hour ago, MAUFRAIS said:

does gideon got herpes?

also he needs his daddy to teach him to tie a tie again.

Stress chancre.  He’s been hearing Stoops was possibly going to be on the new staff for the last two weeks.  

[SDG 3319]

4 minutes ago, stork642 said:

Good god we are such a damaged group.  Hopefully Sark will help us find our collective sacks.  Get your shit together people.  

Exactly; people need to realize that no one of importance was in the administration during the last two hires.  New President, new Athletic Director etc.  Until they fuck it up we should give them the benefit of the doubt.  

[TheAuditor 1035]

2 hours ago, Machinator said:

 

 

He looks like Gru in this picture.  The minions must be close by.  

[AustinMT 952]

1 minute ago, SDG said:

Exactly; people need to realize that no one of importance was in the administration during the last two hires.  New President, new Athletic Director etc.  Until they fuck it up we should give them the benefit of the doubt.  

This is Surly. Bitch early, bitch loud, bitch late.  And no one gets the benefit of the doubt

[stork642 4498]

28 minutes ago, Vertigo said:

She would be fantastic at teaching them to drive their hips. 

She’s been doing two-a-days her whole life.  

[Coelenterate Fuccboi 13091]

2 hours ago, Machinator said:

 

I guess it runs in the family.

[jinx 2635]

9 minutes ago, SDG said:

Exactly; people need to realize that no one of importance was in the administration during the last two hires.  New President, new Athletic Director etc.  Until they fuck it up we should give them the benefit of the doubt.  

I used up my benefit of doubt on all the other fuck ups

[Bevo14 8303]

11 minutes ago, SDG said:

Exactly; people need to realize that no one of importance was in the administration during the last two hires.  New President, new Athletic Director etc.  Until they fuck it up we should give them the benefit of the doubt.  

I'm not panicking because he hit it out of the park on half the hires and the other few are decent to very good. 9/10 is still better than the last two guys and if the redo coach is Lupoi, Marve, or somebody like that then he'll have another homerun.

[cdain3 3454]

[Hmbre97 6305]

That is a mighty fine looking coaching staff

[Pato del Muerto 52487]

Ok I’ve been...unavoidably detained for the past 7 hours so I’ve skipped 10 pages, read this page, and also saw that the official hires thread hasn’t been updated. 
Do we not have a lb coach yet?