Jump to content

Trivial Things That Make You Surly

elfenix

By elfenix
in Lulz

 Share

Recommended Posts

  • Replies 19.2k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Days

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Days

Popular Posts

NeverMarryAStripper
NeverMarryAStripper

If cassettes are coming back, then people will have to start carrying pencils again

nnm
nnm
Armybrat
Armybrat

“No Trucks In Left Lane” - Waxahachie 2023:  

Posted Images

VolenteHawk

VolenteHawk 495

Posted
Posted
25 minutes ago, SwanderedTalent said:

When conferences retroactively claim program achievements. Like the Big Ten putting 1995 Nebraska on its list of its best teams, etc. 

That's a good one.  I've seen some Big 12 fans do it with the West Virginia final four from a few years back.

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites
SwanderedTalent

SwanderedTalent 5761

Posted
Posted

Song lyrics with improper verb tense usage. My 2-yr old loves Run by the Foo Fighters so I hear this every day:

I need some room to breathe
You can stay asleep
If you wanted to
They say that's nothings free
You can run with me
If you wanted to
Yeah you can run with me
If you wanted to

It should be either "could" and "wanted", or "can" and "want". 

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Guest

Guest

Posted
Posted
On 3/11/2019 at 11:13 AM, MNLonghornFUKM said:
On 3/11/2019 at 7:01 AM, deadshank said:
Your card?  You don't have a $10 bill on you?

because for a $8.19 order, its easier to receive back $1.81 instead of a credit card

Twice in the past week I have beengiven incorrect change.  One dude even used a calculator to figure the change from a $10 bill for a $4.27 charge.  He hands me $4.73.  I just look at em and finally say, “ Hey Chief, I gave you a $10.  You owe me another dollar. “ His coworker is dying laughing, “ you even used a calculator and still fucked it up.”

Today I hand the clerk a $20 for a charge of $11.07.  He gived me back $14. 93.   I corrected him and he didn’t want to take the overage back.  Dude in line behind me said he’d take it. Lol  

Pretty sure clerk was high AF, but damn, that’s some 1st grade maf there...

 

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Cheeseweasel

Cheeseweasel 26437

Posted
Posted
21 minutes ago, slorch said:

Twice in the past week I have beengiven incorrect change.  One dude even used a calculator to figure the change from a $10 bill for a $4.27 charge.  He hands me $4.73.  I just look at em and finally say, “ Hey Chief, I gave you a $10.  You owe me another dollar. “ His coworker is dying laughing, “ you even used a calculator and still fucked it up.”

Today I hand the clerk a $20 for a charge of $11.07.  He gived me back $14. 93.   I corrected him and he didn’t want to take the overage back.  Dude in line behind me said he’d take it. Lol  

Pretty sure clerk was high AF, but damn, that’s some 1st grade maf there...

 

 

Happens all the time with me because I hate having dollar bills in my wallet so if something is 6 bucks and I don't have exact change I'll give them a $10 and a $1 to get $5 back. This usually ensues:

confused math GIF by CBC 

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Llano Estacado

Llano Estacado 1257

Posted
Posted
Happens all the time with me because I hate having dollar bills in my wallet so if something is 6 bucks and I don't have exact change I'll give them a $10 and a $1 to get $5 back. This usually ensues:
200.gif 


Attendant enters overpay into register without realizing its overpay. Drawer opens. Stuffs $1 bill in tray. Reads screen. $5.32. Gathers coins. Pulls out same $1 bill and 4 brothers without realizing what just happened. Hands you bills coins and receipt in one motion.

Had that happen a handful of times in the past few years.
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Knoxtnhorn

Knoxtnhorn 5916

Posted
Posted (edited)
20 hours ago, slorch said:

Twice in the past week I have beengiven incorrect change.  One dude even used a calculator to figure the change from a $10 bill for a $4.27 charge.  He hands me $4.73.  I just look at em and finally say, “ Hey Chief, I gave you a $10.  You owe me another dollar. “ His coworker is dying laughing, “ you even used a calculator and still fucked it up.”

Today I hand the clerk a $20 for a charge of $11.07.  He gived me back $14. 93.   I corrected him and he didn’t want to take the overage back.  Dude in line behind me said he’d take it. Lol  

Pretty sure clerk was high AF, but damn, that’s some 1st grade maf there...

 

 

Try this one on for size.

Bill is, say, $5.24.  So you give the person a 10 and a quarter.  Watch the "hilarity" that then ensues.  Now, I get that this just might be a step above normal millennial math; however, there have been times when I've done this and the person was using a register or calculator.  I'm all, "Punch in the numbers and watch the magic happen."  The best part is when they give you five ones, though there's a stack of fives in the drawer.

Edited by Knoxtnhorn
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
52-80

52-80 19041

Posted
Posted
6 minutes ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

Try this one on for size.

Bill is, say, $5.24.  So you give the person a 10 and a quarter.  Watch the "hilarity" that then ensues.  Now, I get that this just might be a step above normal millennial math; however, there have been times when I've done this and the person was using a register or calculator.  I'm all, "Punch in the numbers and watch the magic happen."  The best part is when they give you five ones, though there's a stack of fives in the drawer.

Fuck that.  When I was 15 I took my first job cashiering in a theme park's restaurant. Maybe the first transaction ever, I rung a guy for  7.36 or some such.  Fucker hands me a 10.   I punched it in the POS and out slides the cash tray. 

 

As I'm gathering the indicated change value, he fishes out 50 cents and pushes it on me.  I basically froze up.  Then he starts points at the coins already in my palm and indicates to swap this quarter for that nickel and so on and so forth.

 

I aced all my math classes up to that point.  But I was 15, mindlessly going through the motions.  Fucker made me freeze up and feel dumb as fuck.  Fuck that guy.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Onboard 2.0

Onboard 2.0 9083

Posted
Posted
Just now, Knoxtnhorn said:

Try this one on for size.

Bill is, say, $5.24.  So you give the person a 10 and a quarter.  Watch the "hilarity" that ensues then.  Now, I get that this just might be a step above normal millennial math; however, there have been times when I've done this and the person was using a register or calculator.  I'm all, "Punch in the numbers and watch the magic happen."  The best part is when they give you five ones, though there's a stack of fives in the drawer.

Yer letting them keep the penny right ?  For their troubles and all...

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Knoxtnhorn

Knoxtnhorn 5916

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, 52-80 said:

Fuck that.  When I was 15 I took my first job cashiering in a theme park's restaurant. Maybe the first transaction ever, I rung a guy for  7.36 or some such.  Fucker hands me a 10.   I punched it in the POS and out slides the cash tray. 

 

As I'm gathering the indicated change value, he fishes out 50 cents and pushes it on me.  I basically froze up.  Then he starts points at the coins already in my palm and indicates to swap this quarter for that nickel and so on and so forth.

 

I aced all my math classes up to that point.  But I was 15, mindlessly going through the motions.  Fucker made me freeze up and feel dumb as fuck.  Fuck that guy.

Coincidentally, I honed this skill while working at the Fine Arts Cafeteria @ Texas. Without that experience, I may never have become a "correct change in your head" snob.  :)

Link to comment
Share on other sites
High Plains Drifter

High Plains Drifter 10961

Posted
Posted (edited)

 

On 2/15/2019 at 2:18 PM, Richard Kimball said:

VP is wearing a bow tie. Personal note: only wear a bow tie with a tuxedo. We'll be open and courageous in our communication. Pretty sure they don't want to know what I really think. 

 

45 minutes in: Presenters keep asking if there are questions. NO! We want out!

 

OK, I know that I'm way behind on this thread, but I have to ask,

is your VP a farmer?

 

Also, I hate that one motherfucker who just has to ask some stupid question, then a follow up, then a response, to nail down exactly one useless point. SHUT UP MOTHERFUCKER SHUT THE FUCK UP I WILL KILL YOUDIE DIE DIE

 

 

Yes, I just had a similar thing this week.

Edited by High Plains Drifter
Link to comment
Share on other sites
High Plains Drifter

High Plains Drifter 10961

Posted
Posted
On 3/1/2019 at 1:01 PM, Onboard 2.0 said:

I hate the same bs at office max. The little card scanner asks rewards members if they  want a printed or emailed receipt. I always say e mailed.  Then they still give you a receipt for a 10-20% off coupon if you use it the same day.  WTF, why do you think I want it e mailed ?  I don't want any more pieces of paper to carry out and have to throw away. My life is so firkin surly daily !!!

I just hand it back to them and ask if they will throw it away for me.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Vic Mackey

Vic Mackey 46806

Posted
Posted
On 3/12/2019 at 7:36 AM, Al_4_ISU said:

On the phone etiquette tip, I absolutely can't stand it when you're on the phone with someone and they have to have a conversation with someone in person at the same time.  Unless that person is an interested third party in the phone conversation whose opinion is needed, it is absolutely aggravating.  My wife and her whole family are terrible at this.  It's at the point where if I call my wife and she insists on having the side conversation with whomever is around, I'll just hang up.

Yes this is the fucking worst. If you really need to have a conversation with that person, then call me back later.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Al_4_ISU

Al_4_ISU 12382

Posted
Posted

Adults that don't know cardinal directions really piss me off.

"I can't do 'east' or 'west'.  Just give me left right."  You fucking mouth breather, "left" and "right" are subjective.  North is always north.

It's especially aggravating when you live in Iowa, where 95% of the state is on a cardinal direction oriented road grid.  The roads run straight east/west, straight north/south, and they outline the surveyed sections.  They're generally a mile apart.  Also, look at the fucking sun.  

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Fudge Nuggets

Fudge Nuggets 19097

Posted
Posted
On 3/11/2019 at 5:13 PM, MNLonghornFUKM said:
On 3/11/2019 at 1:01 PM, deadshank said:
Your card?  You don't have a $10 bill on you?

because for a $8.19 order, its easier to receive back $1.81 instead of a credit card

People that use their CC for every single purchase like getting their cards scammed.

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Fudge Nuggets

Fudge Nuggets 19097

Posted
Posted
On 3/12/2019 at 5:47 PM, slorch said:

Twice in the past week I have beengiven incorrect change.  One dude even used a calculator to figure the change from a $10 bill for a $4.27 charge.  He hands me $4.73.  I just look at em and finally say, “ Hey Chief, I gave you a $10.  You owe me another dollar. “ His coworker is dying laughing, “ you even used a calculator and still fucked it up.”

Today I hand the clerk a $20 for a charge of $11.07.  He gived me back $14. 93.   I corrected him and he didn’t want to take the overage back.  Dude in line behind me said he’d take it. Lol  

Pretty sure clerk was high AF, but damn, that’s some 1st grade maf there...

 

 

I like telling them how much change they should give me before they even get done punching it into the register.  It makes me feel superior and shit.

  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites
NorthLoop

NorthLoop 14041

Posted
Posted

When your call drops and you immediately call the person back... and they don't answer, even though your phone was the one that dropped the call. 

Happened to me yesterday driving home from bfe east TX calling my wife. After I got her VM a few times in a row I gave her a what the fuck message. She calls back 15 min later "oh sorry my mom called" 

 

should also go in wives thread. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Greg Davis Apologist

Greg Davis Apologist 213

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, Underdog said:

When living in Austin, wife:  are we going down  to Dallas this weekend? 

My sister does this all of the time. We live in Dallas and she'll say things like "down to Oklahoma" and "down to Minnesota". She's actually somewhat intelligent and I've confronted her multiple times but she doesn't care.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Cheeseweasel

Cheeseweasel 26437

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, NorthLoop said:

When your call drops and you immediately call the person back... and they don't answer, even though your phone was the one that dropped the call. 

Happened to me yesterday driving home from bfe east TX calling my wife. After I got her VM a few times in a row I gave her a what the fuck message. She calls back 15 min later "oh sorry my mom called" 

 

should also go in wives thread. 

Ditto texting. Having a conversation, about to walk into the store. Do you need anything?

45 minutes later.

Oh..can you pick up some lettuce?

BITCH THAT WAS 45 MINUTES AGO.

  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites
PvilleStang

PvilleStang 2823

Posted
Posted
4 hours ago, Lat22 said:

I don't think I've posted this this week, but the thousands of unregistered hoopties in Houston with counterfeit paper license tags. 

[CSB] Place I lived my 3rd year at UT, guy in the back of the complex had paper plates, expired of course.  Someone back there bought a new-ish car, and had their paper plates stolen off the car like two days later (they left the corners of the paper under the frame).  Oddly enough, the original car with paper plates happened to have new ones with a newer expiry date on them.  And the paper tears perfectly matched the neighbor's missing paper plates. [/CSB]

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Coyote

Coyote 269

Posted
Posted
I don't think I've posted this this week, but the thousands of unregistered hoopties in Houston with counterfeit paper license tags. 

These are the same cocksuckers that slow to a crawl any time it rains and fuck traffic up. Every one of these assholes have their wipers maxed out during a soft sprinkle, when the second setting should be plenty sufficient. Change your wiper blades and quit fucking things up for the rest of us.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
 Share
Go to topic listing


Football ... Basketball ... Baseball ... Other Sports ... Futbol ... 🤫995🤫 ... Gambling ... Movies & TV ... Music ... Hobbies ... Lulz ... Food & Travel ... Daily Texan ... Business and Markets ... Cloak Room ... Help ... For Sale ... Board Discussion ... Subscribe!... Donate!... Advertise... COOKIE MONSTER!

×
×
  • Create New...