Trivial Things That Make You Surly

[mycox 582]

1 hour ago, Llogg said:

people who save seats anywhere in a public space. fuck you if your party's not here, I'm sitting down. Nice to meet you.

Not trivial, but people standing in parking spaces reserving the spot until the driver arrives. I've seen it happen.

Edited April 17, 2019 by mycox

[Jersey Man10 3,500]

I hate legal paper.

[lateshow 1,303]

38 minutes ago, Jersey Man10 said:

I hate legal paper.

Would you rather the orders of protection be served to you on Post-It notes? 

[Patricio Swayze 17,058]

One that grinds my gears that I am occasionally guilty of is when someone replies with “I am doing good” or “I am good” instead of well.

[Jersey Man10 3,500]

It gets gooder with time.

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

1 minute ago, Jersey Man10 said:

It gets more gooderer with time.

Me.

[Knoxtnhorn 5,916]

Wife dragged 6 year-old, 12 year-old, and me to an Easter egg hunt this morning.  12 year-old is all, "This would be great if I was 6.  Can we go watch hockey?"  But that's another story.

Oldest and I get in line to get some fresh squeezed lemonade.  30 GD minutes later we're third in line.

1st in line orders, then digs through her purse for between 3-5 mins for change.  This couldn't have been done in line.

2nd in line steps up and orders lemonade.  What size does she want when asked?  She doesn't know despite the fact that the GD SIGN IS 6 GD INCHES FROM HER GD FACE!  So she proceeds to ask about all the sizes and subsequent costs. 

I turned to my wife, handed her the cash, and told her I'd meet her in the car.  THAT'S why I have high blood pressure.

[Knoxtnhorn 5,916]

On 4/18/2019 at 3:59 PM, Patricio Swayze said:

One that grinds my gears that I am occasionally guilty of is when someone replies with “I am doing good” or “I am good” instead of well.

LOL.  Taught that one to my 4th graders last week and asked them to test some of the other teachers in school with the correct response.  

[Bullneck 18,924]

When I see a button on a webpage that says, "Learn More."  Fuck you.  What am I, a 5 year old?

[Bullneck 18,924]

12 hours ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

Wife dragged 6 year-old, 12 year-old, and me to an Easter egg hunt this morning.  12 year-old is all, "This would be great if I was 6.  Can we go watch hockey?"  But that's another story.

Oldest and I get in line to get some fresh squeezed lemonade.  30 GD minutes later we're third in line.

1st in line orders, then digs through her purse for between 3-5 mins for change.  This couldn't have been done in line.

2nd in line steps up and orders lemonade.  What size does she want when asked?  She doesn't know despite the fact that the GD SIGN IS 6 GD INCHES FROM HER GD FACE!  So she proceeds to ask about all the sizes and subsequent costs. 

I turned to my wife, handed her the cash, and told her I'd meet her in the car.  THAT'S why I have high blood pressure.

The problem is you.  You are the problem.  You have not handled the situation with aplomb. You have an aplomb shortage and don't understand the keys to a less stressful life. 

Let me help:  Next time, grind your gears all you want while in line but when it's your turn to order, say, "I'll have a lemonade.  With two shots of vodka.  Oh, hell, you only go around once.  Make it three (hold up three fingers so the dumb kid/bartender understands you want three shots),  It may be 9am in Knoxville but it's always 5 o'clock somewhere."

It's possible this will cause some commotion.  If so, you're either at the wrong place at the wrong time or someone done an exceedingly poor job of training their kids/bartenders.

  

Edited April 21, 2019 by Bullneck

[Js1 84,939]

On 4/18/2019 at 3:59 PM, Patricio Swayze said:

One that grinds my gears that I am occasionally guilty of is when someone replies with “I am doing good” or “I am good” instead of well.

[Bullneck 18,924]

28 minutes ago, Js1 said:

I'm stealing that.

[HornsOverIthaca 2,333]

I'm annoyed by people who dress up their dogs.

[HouTex 1,839]

The problem is you.  You are the problem.  You have not handled the situation with aplomb. You have an aplomb shortage and don't understand the keys to a less stressful life. 
Let me help:  Next time, grind your gears all you want while in line but when it's your turn to order, say, "I'll have a lemonade.  With two shots of vodka.  Oh, hell, you only go around once.  Make it three (hold up three fingers so the dumb kid/bartender understands you want three shots),  It may be 9am in Knoxville but it's always 5 o'clock somewhere."
It's possible this will cause some commotion.  If so, you're either at the wrong place at the wrong time or someone done an exceedingly poor job of training their kids/bartenders.
  

He should have brought a flask.

[Guest]

People at sporting events who think they are funny with their loud mouth banter and comments."The players love it.  It makes them laugh"

They're not laughing with you...they're laughing at you.

 

and for crisakes stop telling the runner on first his lead is too big when 1B man is 20 feet from the bag.

I fucking swear I was surrounded by gotdam aggies last night, but alas, I was 500 miles from Olsen-Cream of Death Park

[Vic Mackey 46,808]

I'm annoyed by people who dress up their dogs.

White people...

[Uncle Nate 2,097]

When people type "loose" for "lose" and vice-versa. It's become an epidemic. Even saw it in a newspaper headline recently. 

[Walden Ponderer 12,638]

Whipped cream on a chocolate shake. Whipped cream shouldn't be put on anything other than a porn star.

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

9 minutes ago, Walden Ponderer said:

Whipped cream on a chocolate shake. Whipped cream shouldn't be put on anything other than a porn star.

I don't mind if it's put on my dick by a porn star or just any of yer garden variety hot chicks for that matter ...

[Cheeseweasel 26,437]

16 hours ago, Uncle Nate said:

When people type "loose" for "lose" and vice-versa. It's become an epidemic. Even saw it in a newspaper headline recently. 

[SwanderedTalent 5,761]

On 4/20/2019 at 11:14 PM, Bullneck said:

When I see a button on a webpage that says, "Learn More."  Fuck you.  What am I, a 5 year old?

well, you're clearly not a citizen!

[Guest Lobo]

People over the age of 25 who use the word “like” an average of 5 times per minute on a 3 minute conversation.  Discretely Tape yourself speaking with your phone a few times per day.  Listen to it privately at the end of the day.  Then eat a lot of pills.  

[Uncle Nate 2,097]

I'm finding this particular annoying habit mostly in the millennial generation...

Someone is presenting information (class presentation or a podcast/radio interview), in the form of a statement, not a question, but ends the statement with a voice inflection that you would normally use when asking a question.  I just want to yell at them, "Are you making a statement or asking a question?  You can do one or the other, but not both."

I don't know if it's because they don't have enough conviction to make a statement or what.  But it's highly, highly annoying and makes me want to force everyone to take a proper speech class. 

EDIT:  Apparently there is a term for this..."uptalk".  I fucking hate it.  

Edited April 22, 2019 by Uncle Nate

[Incredulity 11,400]

30 minutes ago, Uncle Nate said:

I'm finding this particular annoying habit mostly in the millennial generation...

Someone is presenting information (class presentation or a podcast/radio interview), in the form of a statement, not a question, but ends the statement with a voice inflection that you would normally use when asking a question.  I just want to yell at them, "Are you making a statement or asking a question?  You can do one or the other, but not both."

I don't know if it's because they don't have enough conviction to make a statement or what.  But it's highly, highly annoying and makes me want to force everyone to take a proper speech class. 

EDIT:  Apparently there is a term for this..."uptalk".  I fucking hate it.  

IMPO worse than the more commonly bitched about vocal fry.

 

 

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

3 minutes ago, Incredulity said:

IMPO worse than the more commonly bitched about vocal fry.

 

 

Vocal fry is nails on a chalkboard. You're an adult, speak like one please, for the love of God.

[Uncle Nate 2,097]

I always thought vocal fry was just someone trying to squeeze out more words without taking another breath, or just getting lazy at the end of a sentence.  My older sister is one of the worst offenders of vocal fry.  Drives me insane.

But the upspeak/uptalk I'm hearing from this younger generation has trumped it on the annoying scale.

[BadgerHorn 147]

Vocal fry is often an attempt to artificially deepen one's voice to be taken more seriously.  Opposite outcome is usually the case.

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

11 minutes ago, BadgerHorn said:

Vocal fry is often an attempt to artificially deepen one's voice to be taken more seriously.  Opposite outcome is usually the case.

Really ?  'cause if that's the  reason they're missing the mark by about 30 years. It sounds like they're 12.

[BadgerHorn 147]

Some evidence exists of vocal fry becoming more common in the speech of young female speakers of American English in the early 21st century,[4][5][6][7][8] but its frequency's extent and significance are disputed.[9][10] Researcher Ikuko Patricia Yuasa suggests that the tendency is a product of young women trying to infuse their speech with gravitas by means of reaching for the male register and found that "college-age Americans [...] perceive female creaky voice as hesitant, nonaggressive, and informal but also educated, urban-oriented, and upwardly mobile."[4]

http:// https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Vocal_fry_register

[Asithappens 974]

People who say bacon is over-rated.

I mean, wtf?

[SHOOTER12 8,775]

On 4/15/2019 at 8:40 AM, Vic Mackey said:

On 4/15/2019 at 3:28 AM, 52-80 said:

stepped on chewing gum on the way to the office today.
 
honestly, chewing bubble gum is annoying enough as it is.  if you throw that shit carelessly on the ground, i fully support singaporean-style caning for that kind of action

People who litter in general need to be castrated.

Oh bull s***, you don't really believe that. I know for a fact then you throw down two or three cholas per week on the ground.

[Uncle Nate 2,097]

28 minutes ago, Asithappens said:

People who say bacon is over-rated.

I mean, wtf?

Mental illness and/or demon possession is a bitch.

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

28 minutes ago, Asithappens said:

People who say bacon is over-rated.

I mean, wtf?

If this phrase can't unite Surly, there's no hope for humanity.

[deadshank 24,646]

Every action adventure, cops and wops, suspense and or horror movie with a scene where someone is entering a dark room, dark house, dim warehouse or whatever and the characters cautiously walk around without the dang lights on.   

Flip on the cotton picking lights, dingbat. 

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

Just now, deadshank said:

Every action adventure, cops and wops, suspense and or horror movie with a scene where someone is entering a dark room, dark house, dim warehouse or whatever and the characters cautiously walk around without the dang lights on.   

Flip on the cotton picking lights, dingbat. 

People who sit in dark movie theaters, and yell out... "turn the damn lights on !!".  

[WhatTheBuck 28,694]

"Cops and wops?" Never heard that before. Is it as racist as it sounds?

[Guest]

Yep.

 

Gangsta movies.

[DougO 5,238]

They way they make t-post clips way too short on one side and super long on the other side. WTF?

[Guest]

1 hour ago, DougO said:

They way they make t-post clips way too short on one side and super long on the other side. WTF?

buncha city slickers up in here have no fucking idea...

[Henry Hill 3,156]

On 4/21/2019 at 4:29 PM, Uncle Nate said:

When people type "loose" for "lose" and vice-versa. It's become an epidemic. Even saw it in a newspaper headline recently. 

take the loose pussy

[WhatTheBuck 28,694]

55 minutes ago, Henry Hill said:

take the loose pussy

Okay. 

[Henry Hill 3,156]

3 minutes ago, WhatTheBuck said:

Okay. 

[Asithappens 974]

On 4/21/2019 at 8:36 AM, Js1 said:

 

I guess discussing saying "axe" instead of "ask" would be, um, racist here?

But that's not grammar....

[MNLonghornFUKM 8,791]

Usually belongs in the wives thread but when someone texts you, you call them immediately, and they dont answer

[Llano Estacado 1,257]

They way they make t-post clips way too short on one side and super long on the other side. WTF?

If you’re using pliers to wrap you’re doing it wrong.

Couple cents worth of SS tubing or a nail/screwdriver with a notch filed into it is the best clip tool their is.

[Js1 84,939]

7 minutes ago, MNLonghornFUKM said:

Usually belongs in the wives thread but when someone texts you, you call them immediately, and they dont answer

I texted you for a reason.  Don't call me unless I asked you to. 

[bluto 4,861]

7 minutes ago, MNLonghornFUKM said:

Usually belongs in the wives thread but when someone texts you, you call them immediately, and they dont answer

If I'm in a meeting/conference type situation and can't actually talk then deal with it 

[VolenteHawk 495]

10 minutes ago, MNLonghornFUKM said:

Usually belongs in the wives thread but when someone texts you, you call them immediately, and they dont answer

If you miss a call, do you immediately show up knocking on that person's door?  Why are you shifting communication methods?

 

[MNLonghornFUKM 8,791]

I texted you for a reason.  Don't call me unless I asked you to. 

Nobody ever asks anyone to call me via text. They just call. I assume you can find time to talk if you have time to text

If I'm in a meeting/conference type situation and can't actually talk then deal with it 

Chill, you're not that important

If you miss a call, do you immediately show up knocking on that person's door?  Why are you shifting communication methods?
 

Yes.

[Uncle Nate 2,097]

MNLonghornFUKM - are you my brother?  Because he does that shit.

I'm with the others.  If I wanted to talk, I would have called.  But I didn't...I texted.

In this same vein...at work...people who call and leave a message wanting some immediate response.  Guess what...if you had emailed me...you would have had your immediate response.  Because I can check emails while in meetings, but I can't return phone calls.  They seem to think my only job is to sit at my desk waiting for their call.