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Trivial Things That Make You Surly


elfenix

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15 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:


I can’t think of 5 or 6 people that I know period that I would vacation with. I go on vacation to get away from the people I know.

Me too, but my wife and kids keep insisting on coming.

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Went to see ZOSO last night.  What annoys the fuck out of me is when people feel the need to stick their phones in the air and record the entire fucking show, blocking my view, and not EXPERIENCING the fucking greatness of the show.  Get out of my way, and get the fuck off my lawn.

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About two years ago my neighbors went to Jamaica for vacation and the husband left his nice pickup in the street. A big storm was about to roll through and I see he has left the power window behind the cab open. I run and grab some plastic and duct tape (not the best choice but all I could find in a hurry). I seal the window off as it starts raining. When they get back he thanks me. There was some residue from the tape when he pulled it off. Something very easy to clean off. Well goddamn it, 2 years later and the residue is still there. I should have let the rain get in.

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On 5/10/2019 at 2:56 PM, Dbeasy said:

My wife leaves the driver’s side car visor unhooked. She doesn’t rotate it down to block the sun, she just leaves it unhooked so that it slightly bounces up and down as we travel down the highway. Up. Down. Up. Down. Up. Down. Kill me.

find your sack and remove the motherfucker.

get her a ballcap.

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2 hours ago, BurntEyes said:

Wait.. like a common occurrence?

I travelled with a female coworker friend only!! No pics assholes to "long lunches" as well as tubing down south and to ones bachelor party in Vegas but in general fuck that shit. I saw enough of them.

Loser.....

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2 hours ago, BurntEyes said:

Wait.. like a common occurrence?

I travelled with a female coworker friend only!! No pics assholes to "long lunches" as well as tubing down south and to ones bachelor party in Vegas but in general fuck that shit. I saw enough of them.

So you tubed your female coworker at a bachelor party in Vegas? Nice!

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14 minutes ago, Sandman said:

People that can't figure out how to use "bias" and "biased" in a sentence. They can DIAF with the "dominate" and "dominant" fuckers.  

The only good thing about it is that I now know who has read a book or two and who has not.

If you use dominate instead of dominant I just assume you're a fucking moron. Same for "explanation point"

9 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

People who use "exasperate" when they mean to use "exacerbate.'  So, like ALL PEOPLE ALL THE TIME.  I DON'T THINK I'VE EVER SEEN SOMEONE USE THE CORRECT GODDAMNED WORD.

I give people that do this a little more leeway, but it is without a doubt one of the most frequent mistakes that I see that I feel the need to grammar police. 

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46 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

People who use "exasperate" when they mean to use "exacerbate.'  So, like ALL PEOPLE ALL THE TIME.  I DON'T THINK I'VE EVER SEEN SOMEONE USE THE CORRECT GODDAMNED WORD.

So this exacerbates your exasperation?

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49 minutes ago, ztejas said:

I work in an office with all women (for another couple months at least). 

Sometimes I get the question, "What's it like being the only guy?"

Today I come back from lunch to a cupcake tray that a client has gifted us:

20190514-140802.jpg

damn. Id take thirds of all 9 cupcakes and have at it.

 

wife confirms its a woman thing. its to have more than one flavor

Edited by MNLonghornFUKM
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7 hours ago, Brisketexan said:

People who use "exasperate" when they mean to use "exacerbate.'  So, like ALL PEOPLE ALL THE TIME.  I DON'T THINK I'VE EVER SEEN SOMEONE USE THE CORRECT GODDAMNED WORD.

You're  making the situation ......  what's the word ?     Worse.

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2 hours ago, Lobo said:

$20 says it was one woman that did that by herself.  

Oh no this was definitely a group effort.

But seriously, just cut it in half. They were pretty big cupcakes so I get it, but this cut a 1/4 off shit is ridiculous. I don't want your 2/3 of a cupcake that you've had your hands all over. 

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cupcakes and doughnuts are single serving pastries. the women at work are constantly cutting them into bits. every single one of them is overweight, some of them grossly so. why make a show of eating a quarter of a cupcake when you're just going to home and eat two little caesar's large pizzas by yourself?

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4 hours ago, EMAWesome said:

Goddamn motherfuckers who spit their gum out on golf courses.  This is two years in a row I am going to spend six months trying to get a goddamn piece of gum out of the threads of my soft spikes of one of my shoes.

Worse than that are the cocksuckers that spit sunflower seed shells on the putting green.

I hope they either choke on them or get a festering tumor in their colon because those little nuts get caught in the wall.

Edited by Steamboat1874
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2 hours ago, Llogg said:

 why make a show of eating a quarter of a cupcake when you're just going to home and eat two little caesar's large pizzas by yourself?

They do this so they can tell others (and themselves) that they only had a bite or a small piece. 

Of course it will be 8 or 9 pieces.  But that's 8 or 9 bites that are so small they really don't count, right!

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1 hour ago, ABSR said:

They do this so they can tell others (and themselves) that they only had a bite or a small piece. 

Of course it will be 8 or 9 pieces.  But that's 8 or 9 bites that are so small they really don't count, right!

Meh. I'll do it sometimes to try the different offerings. There is a new donut shop in town that has a billion different types and people like to bring them in to the office. They have about a pound of sugar per bite so most people take small pieces to try the different varieties and consume a reasonable amount of sugar. I'm okay with it.

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11 hours ago, 'stache said:

It happened again. Having a sexy time dream and wake up right before the good stuff starts. Every dang time.

And sometimes you can feel yourself starting to come out of it and you're like "nooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

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