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12 minutes ago, Steamboat1874 said:

The water they wash towels and wash cloths with at most hotels is so fucking hot they are usually still warm when you check in.

Seriously doubt you should worry too much about them.

The television remote is much worse.

Well, the TV remote is the key to hotel room porn....

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1 hour ago, Steamboat1874 said:

The water they wash towels and wash cloths with at most hotels is so fucking hot they are usually still warm when you check in.

Seriously doubt you should worry too much about them.

The television remote is much worse.

if you jerk off with latex gloves you don't get remote germs and it feels like someone else giving you an old fashioned

19 hours ago, Shoxthemonkey said:

I use them as cum rags. Some people don't like that.

This. 

19 hours ago, Shoxthemonkey said:

I use them as cum rags. Some people don't like that.

But some people do.

....so I've been told...by a friend.

36 minutes ago, elfenix said:

if you jerk off with latex gloves you don't get remote germs and it feels like someone else giving you an old fashioned

PSA:  You better lube up well. That rubber is grippy if you get my drift. Nobody needs speed rash.

Edited by Shoxthemonkey

If the glove isn't tight fitting then it feels like grandma is giving you a handy...  so I've been told...  from a friend. 

On 3/17/2020 at 10:49 AM, ABSR said:

When you have one that is keeping your deposit (half of the projected cost) for a Bar Mitzvah party that has to be canceled because of Covid19, get back to me.

Although I guess this should be in the Non-Trivial things topic.

 

Sorry, didn't mean to tell my nothing story.  Thank you for immediately one upping me.

5 minutes ago, PilotsError said:

 

Sorry, didn't mean to tell my nothing story.  Thank you for immediately one upping me.

Hell, I know a guy way worse at that one upping shit....

11 hours ago, ernest_t_bass said:

I loathe the thumb up/like option on an iPhone.  I don't know why.  Cringe worthy.

👌🏿

12 hours ago, ernest_t_bass said:

I loathe the thumb up/like option on an iPhone.  I don't know why.  Cringe worthy.

That's some trivial bullshit right there. Well done.

People who block the sidewalk when they park their cars in the driveway

Edited by Jameslaw121

1 minute ago, Jameslaw121 said:

People who block the sidewalk when the part their cars in the driveway

totally hate those fuckers parting out cars in driveways.

52 minutes ago, Jameslaw121 said:

People who block the sidewalk when they park their cars in the driveway

Expanding on this, fuckers who back their jacked up monster trucks into spots in surface lots downtown so that the bed completely blocks the sidewalk.  Fuck you for making me walk in the street.

17 minutes ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Expanding on this, fuckers who back their jacked up monster trucks into spots in surface lots downtown so that the bed completely blocks the sidewalk.  Fuck you for making me walk in the street.

Don’t you feel bad for them? They have to go through life with a little bitty pecker, and the embarrassment of knowing that the whole world knows it. Poor guys. 

On 3/20/2020 at 6:49 AM, Onboard 2.0 said:

Well, the TV remote is the key to hotel room porn....

Know how I know you haven't traveled in a while?

2 hours ago, Jameslaw121 said:

People who block the sidewalk when they park their cars in the driveway

People who can’t fucking drive and sideswipe vehicles in the street.  See also little kids on bikes/ skateboards/ etc.

Go run in the fucking park if you get pissy about my cars in MY driveway.

38 minutes ago, shakahorn said:

Know how I know you haven't traveled in a while?

No I don't.

18 minutes ago, Iceman said:

People who can’t fucking drive and sideswipe vehicles in the street.  See also little kids on bikes/ skateboards/ etc.

Go run in the fucking park if you get pissy about my cars in MY driveway.

In Texas, it's illegal to park over the sidewalk. Also, fuck you for making me walk in the street with a baby stroller. If you can't figure out how to park your car without inconveniencing someone else, you're an asshole

12 minutes ago, Jameslaw121 said:

In Texas, it's illegal to park over the sidewalk. Also, fuck you for making me walk in the street with a baby stroller. If you can't figure out how to park your car without inconveniencing someone else, you're an asshole

Ok.  The whole neighborhood shoulda made the driveways longer.  Not my problem.  Not parking in the street. Period.

Make the kid walk.

 

Edited by Iceman

On 3/19/2020 at 4:37 PM, Shoxthemonkey said:

I use them as cum rags. Some people don't like that.

Shocker. 

1 hour ago, Iceman said:

Ok.  The whole neighborhood shoulda made the driveways longer.  Not my problem.  Not parking in the street. Period.

Make the kid walk.

 

image.png.b429258e4f9dcfd7e530190293a3c67d.png

Edited by NeverMarryAStripper
Because I'd have you towed

yep...and even with all of the complainers, and you can bet your sweet ass one of the douches tried to file suit; nobody in our (large) subdivision ever was cited for the infraction.

take your legalese and add a dash or two of common sense and walk away...

6 hours ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

No I don't.

All the major hotel chains have discontinued pay per view porn.  The only place I...err...a buddy of mine has seen pay per view porn is Vegas.

11 hours ago, Iceman said:

yep...and even with all of the complainers, and you can bet your sweet ass one of the douches tried to file suit; nobody in our (large) subdivision ever was cited for the infraction.

take your legalese and add a dash or two of common sense and walk away...

they ticket folks in our neighborhood for it and it makes me very happy

43 minutes ago, DigglerontheHoof said:

they ticket folks in our neighborhood for it and it makes me very happy

good for ya...

making people walk in the street makes me happy.  So does having mirrors on both sides of my vehicles.

The "Okay, got it" auto-response from an Uber driver when you send them a text with detailed location instructions. No, you don't got it, you didn't even read the fucking message. Shithead.

8 hours ago, shakahorn said:

All the major hotel chains have discontinued pay per view porn

Our kids will never know how to negotiate at check out. 

45 minutes ago, El Diablo said:

The "Okay, got it" auto-response from an Uber driver when you send them a text with detailed location instructions. No, you don't got it, you didn't even read the fucking message. Shithead.

 

what do you want them to do?  retype the whole thing back to you?

2 hours ago, PilotsError said:

 

what do you want them to do?  retype the whole thing back to you?

Well, the honest thing to do would be no response at all because 9 times out of 10 it seems to be the case that they did not "get it". 

Ok.  The whole neighborhood shoulda made the driveways longer.  Not my problem.  Not parking in the street. Period.
Make the kid walk.
 


Perhaps you shouldn’t have bought a house with a micro driveway if it’s that important to you.
14 minutes ago, luke duke said:

 


Perhaps you shouldn’t have bought a house with a micro driveway if it’s that important to you.

 

It doesn't bother me or most of the other people in that subdivision( imperial Oaks in Spring/ Conroe)

4 cars in driveway( school aged kids) and if we parked in the street on both sides, you can barely get a car down the street safely.   The way we do it IS safer, regardless of the law.  That might be why nobody is getting citations...just maybe.

Seems to bother a shit ton of you motherfuckers though.  even better...

Edited by Iceman

16 hours ago, luke duke said:

Sorry your house sucks.

House was great.  Neighborhood was great. Great place to raise a family. Not a lot of douchers like the complainers on here.

 

We’ve been gone a year, so property values likely skyrocketed...

16 minutes ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Social distancing does not mean you don’t have to clean up after your moose shits in my yard
7f8db7cd2532e3a5a14fc4424d2afa55.jpg

Yeah, there’s some knucklehead in our neighborhood that seems to be walking an elephant, judging by the size of the turds he’s leaving on the sidewalk. Every other soul in the neighborhood picks up their dog turds, but not the elephant-walker. I’m really hoping I get to catch that idiot in the act, so I can bag up all the turds and leave them on their front step. 

On 3/26/2020 at 7:08 AM, Iceman said:

We’ve been gone a year, so property values likely skyrocketed...

Yeah, when that one shitty family leaves the property values really take off.  😉 

I came here to post about something really trivial..... damn... it's..... it was........ I can't....... it must have been really trivial....

13 hours ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

I came here to post about something really trivial..... damn... it's..... it was........ I can't....... it must have been really trivial....

Time to put you in the home, dad.

  • 2 weeks later...

The one rogue nose hair that drives you insane tickling the inside of your nose. 

11 minutes ago, deadshank said:

The one rogue nose hair that drives you insane tickling the inside of your nose. 

During a zoom meeting.  While you are reminding your subordinates to not touch their faces.  And it causes you to sneeze.  Fuck China, and fuck nose hair.

During a zoom meeting.  While you are reminding your subordinates to not touch their faces.  And it causes you to sneeze.  Fuck China, and fuck nose hair.
If you are in a zoom, presumably from your house, why are you reminding people to not touch their face?
2 minutes ago, markstanco said:
2 hours ago, Scheiss Meister said:
During a zoom meeting.  While you are reminding your subordinates to not touch their faces.  And it causes you to sneeze.  Fuck China, and fuck nose hair.

If you are in a zoom, presumably from your house, why are you reminding people to not touch their face?

Company line.  The guys working from home are the backup for the personnel at work.  I am expected to constantly remind them to stay healthy in case they have to go in and replace someone.  It's juvenile and childish, but, hey, so is high school.

9 hours ago, Scheiss Meister said:

Company line.  The guys working from home are the backup for the personnel at work.  I am expected to constantly remind them to stay healthy in case they have to go in and replace someone.  It's juvenile and childish, but, hey, so is high school.

"faces" are low on the list of things you need to worry about highschoolers touching.

14 minutes ago, Cheeseweasel said:

"faces" are low on the list of things you need to worry about highschoolers touching.

I was riffing on Ferris Buehler's licking his hands remark, because I think that treating my guys like school kids and lecturing them every day is kind of juvenile and childish.  We are wastewater operators; we live wash your hands/don't touch your face every minute of every work day.  It's silly to keep reminding them, but everyone else in the city has to be told, so we get it, too.

Edited by Scheiss Meister

27 minutes ago, Scheiss Meister said:

I was riffing on Ferris Buehler's licking his hands remark, because I think that treating my guys like school kids and lecturing them every day is kind of juvenile and childish.  We are wastewater operators; we live wash your hands/don't touch your face every minute of every work day.  It's silly to keep reminding them, but everyone else in the city has to be told, so we get it, too.

Hmmmmmmm..... how are your TPs reports ?  You putting the correct covers on them ??

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Maybe I've worked with women way too long but if I send someone an email and they begin their response with "Hi [first name]!" I get incredibly pissed. That's what women do when they want to be condescending and arrogant but can't let their bitchy voice do all of the heavy lifting.

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