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Trivial Things That Make You Surly

elfenix

By elfenix
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MNLonghornFUKM

MNLonghornFUKM 8817

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51 minutes ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

Fucking fatass sister-in-law has been tagging along with us this week at Disney.  Started to lecture me yesterday about how unhealthy cooking on a grill is (carcinogens).  This from the 300-pounder who has had dessert after every effing meal this week.  We had to drive to another hotel this morning so she could get Mickey shaped waffles with chocolate chips.  The spandex she has worn every day has been an added bonus.

those poor pants. 

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NeverMarryAStripper
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If cassettes are coming back, then people will have to start carrying pencils again

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Armybrat
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“No Trucks In Left Lane” - Waxahachie 2023:  

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Billy Pilgrim

Billy Pilgrim 1960

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After watching the US Open last weekend, I realize I get pissed off when douche bags scream "get in the hole" after every single drive....even if it's on a par 4 or 5. Seemed to be happening more often at this tournament. I chalk it up to dumb ass new yorkers. They should throw these dumb fucks out of the tournament. 

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Buffsoldier

Buffsoldier 1895

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4 hours ago, Billy Pilgrim said:

After watching the US Open last weekend, I realize I get pissed off when douche bags scream "get in the hole" after every single drive....even if it's on a par 4 or 5. Seemed to be happening more often at this tournament. I chalk it up to dumb ass new yorkers. They should throw these dumb fucks out of the tournament. 

Serious question, does this occur at the Masters as well? I haven't watched in the last 3-4 years, but it seems like Augusta National is the one place that wouldn't tolerate that asshattery.

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MNLonghornFUKM

MNLonghornFUKM 8817

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I was 9 the first time visiting Florida and we were at Daytona beach on like the 12th floor of our hotel and I had a bag of cheetos or something similar

 

I got one seagulls attention by tossing him a cheeto which got his buddies attention immediately so he got one....within seconds I had probably 10-15 flying up to the balcony getting tossed a cheeto then flying off. I thought it was the coolest thing ever and that's all I wanted to do was to feed more gulls that trip. 

 

So if you were staying at  a hotel in DB back in 1995 and got shat on by a gull... my bad.

Edited by MNLonghornFUKM
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AUinHsv

AUinHsv 579

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11 hours ago, Buffsoldier said:

Serious question, does this occur at the Masters as well? I haven't watched in the last 3-4 years, but it seems like Augusta National is the one place that wouldn't tolerate that asshattery.

Exactly - the penalty of getting tossed and losing future tickets forever has a great effect on behavior.  I have posted this before but they could end the yelling crap by starting to enforce any existing laws on public intox.  Yep it's  low priority but a few hours in the drunk tank and having to explain in job interviews - might make people think twice.

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WBT

WBT 20561

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On 6/22/2018 at 9:47 AM, PvilleStang said:

Last time the wife and I flew, the larger couple two or three rows back grabbed their shit when we landed and got on their starting blocks.  They pushed their way right past us when our turn to grab and go came up.  Every fucking person up to that point waited for those in front of them to get up and go, and it was moving quite nicely, until the Klumps turn, to which they said, fuck your social contract, we've got a Golden Corral to put out of business.

Good for them.  If someone behind has their shit and is ready to go, why are you jumping in the aisle to get in the way?  People that can't fly without carrying on so much shit that it takes 5 minutes to get it all down are the ones being inconsiderate.

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deadshank

deadshank 24652

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On 6/23/2018 at 11:02 AM, Knoxtnhorn said:

Fucking fatass sister-in-law has been tagging along with us this week at Disney.  Started to lecture me yesterday about how unhealthy cooking on a grill is (carcinogens).  This from the 300-pounder who has had dessert after every effing meal this week.  We had to drive to another hotel this morning so she could get Mickey shaped waffles with chocolate chips.  The spandex she has worn every day has been an added bonus.

Does her ass in the spandex look like a sack full of golf balls?

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BayouBill

BayouBill 835

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On 6/21/2018 at 3:51 PM, Lobo said:

I'm a time in my life where I can much more easily listen to a man talk about his kids as opposed to listening to a grown man talk about his fantasy football team or what he thinks of the Cowboys.  Because as annoying as his children are, they are real.  His online and video-game based delusions aren't real, nor does he play for the Cowboys despite his jersey.  

Related...but any man over the age of 12 wearing a jersey makes me embarrassed for him. 

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El Diablo

El Diablo 4232

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On 6/23/2018 at 11:02 AM, Knoxtnhorn said:

Fucking fatass sister-in-law has been tagging along with us this week at Disney.  Started to lecture me yesterday about how unhealthy cooking on a grill is (carcinogens).  This from the 300-pounder who has had dessert after every effing meal this week.  We had to drive to another hotel this morning so she could get Mickey shaped waffles with chocolate chips.  The spandex she has worn every day has been an added bonus.

I bet she's got some big ol' titties, don't she? - Vic

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Rimbo

Rimbo 25919

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On 6/22/2018 at 8:48 AM, Lobo said:

We're obviously going to teeter on racial sensitivity here, but why is that a culture so entrenched in tradition and etiquette treats personal space in public places like a joke meant to be shit on?  And in particular, Chinese/SE Asian women?  It's not a stereotype when I get hip-checked 6 times a day whilst traveling.  And it's always them.

because that *is* the culture and tradition

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skipperj

skipperj 377

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6 minutes ago, elfenix said:
3 hours ago, BurntEyes said:
Pigeons and squirrels same fucking thing. 

When a squirrel steals your Littlefield Fountain roach coach eggroll

Man, I ate a lot  of those in college. Sometimes the “Stromboli”.

Edited by skipperj
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ShaggyBevo RIP

ShaggyBevo RIP 3868

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On 5/18/2018 at 7:30 PM, Rimbo said:

No point. Records are obsolete technology. The problem vanishes with one more byte per sample per channel. But you will see people barf out endless nonsense decrying the possibility that anyone might be able to hear a difference.

The recent "laurel/yanny" thing that popped up onto the internet has made me happy, because suddenly, everything I've been talking about has come to the forefront. That said, I have exactly 0 hope that anything will come of this.

14% of album sales in 2017 were on vinyl. 

Steve Jobs saw/heard the light on digital audio compression and was working on better lossless digital format when he passed. Fuck cancer. 

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Rimbo

Rimbo 25919

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3 hours ago, ShaggyBevo RIP said:

14% of album sales in 2017 were on vinyl. 

Steve Jobs saw/heard the light on digital audio compression and was working on better lossless digital format when he passed. Fuck cancer. 

Commercial statistics are meaningless in terms of mathematics and science. People aren't buying vinyl because they hear a difference, even though they can.

Compression doesn't matter if it's 1. lossy or 2. coming from a source that is lower quality than the ear needs.

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RPM

RPM 26318

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On 6/8/2018 at 4:05 PM, Biff Tannen said:

When the trash men leave the top of my can open after they pick it up and assholes walking their dogs drop their poo bags in there.  I know it's trash, but god dammit, now I have dog shit in the bottom of my can for a week.

0be01c4c3dd577a67c61795e5cede1f3--my-nam

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Prepuce of Doom

Prepuce of Doom 21065

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Posted (edited)
3 hours ago, Sandman said:

Why does every local news station have a piece of shit website? All 3 of my local affiliate's websites fucking suck. It's like they're having a contest to see which one can be the worst. 

If the website is too useful, then you'll stop watching the local news. Or at least that's my assumption for how they justify this otherwise inexplicable phenomenon. 

Edited by Prepuce of Doom
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5 hours ago, elfenix said:

Apps that spawn a bunch of notifications. I'm uninstalling your shit.

Oh yes... or the “please click here if you’d like every possible notification known to man, ranging from smoke signal to an lectric shock in your spine when someone sends you a reply”

 

who the fuck lives that way?

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Celery Man

Celery Man 20934

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What I like to do after shopping at a busy HEB with a busy HEB parking lot is to walk out the front and up to (but not into) the drive in front of the store and stop and look.  I might turn around, and then turn back around and take a single step and stop, and then walk a few steps in a different direction, and then stop again, and look into my purse for a few seconds.  And then lean as if I'm going to step into the street, but then change my mind at the last second.  Oh sorry are there other humans trying to go about their lives without running down someone in front of a grocery store?  Maybe I should look at my phone for a minute as I stand here and appear as if I may begin to walk.

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