Trivial Things That Make You Surly

[Patricio Swayze 17,058]

I am used to those slow close toilet seats, so when I instinctively just let go of the seat of a toilet that is not slow close and it makes a ridiculously loud slam, that makes me surly.

[52-80 19,046]

the public bathroom hand-drying dispenser thats a cloth roll.  i know its a large roll that gets changed but i just feel like its a tiny loop that gets cycled over and over again.

[Okie State 3,746]

the public bathroom hand-drying dispenser thats a cloth roll.  i know its a large roll that gets changed but i just feel like its a tiny loop that gets cycled over and over again.

I have never seen one of these in person. Seems like a terrible idea.

[52-80 19,046]

2 minutes ago, Okie State said:

1 hour ago, 52-80 said:

the public bathroom hand-drying dispenser thats a cloth roll.  i know its a large roll that gets changed but i just feel like its a tiny loop that gets cycled over and over again.

I have never seen one of these in person. Seems like a terrible idea.

never used one of these? count your blessing.  theyre the devils invention

 

 

[elfenix 34,161]

I think I last saw one of those in the 80s

[Superhero 8,696]

Hotel hair dryers. A lot of noise, but not a lot of oomph.

I'll begrudgingly use them to dry my daughter's hair, but it takes twice as long as using my wife's Dyson.

[WhatTheBuck 28,696]

5 hours ago, mininghorn88 said:

I go to the Canton Trade Days fairly regularly. I am very specific on what I look for (WW2 militaria) so I can cover a lot of area in a hurry because I can usually skip most booths that I can tell will not have anything by a quick glance. I try to go on a Friday when it is less crowded. However, despite my best efforts of a quick trip it is always slowed down by folks on electric scooters randomly running around and stopping in the middle of the lane to get off and, in a perfectly healthy walk, get off an go look in the booths. Many drive too fast and turn without looking. The worst are the ones that are pulling a wagon. I hate it. I understand that there are some that need them but most do not.

I have been yelled at more than once by pushing someone’s ride out of the way. I just stop and say, “well come move it then”. Usually get a perturbed look in return but I continue to push out of the way in an opposite direction.

At some point you need to hop in one of those abandoned scooters and drive away. 

[mininghorn88 2,250]

1 hour ago, WhatTheBuck said:

At some point you need to hop in one of those abandoned scooters and drive away. 

I have thought about it but I could not get very far very fast. Looks like I-35 on Game Day.

[Underdog 28,382]

12 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said:

At some point you need to hop in one of those abandoned scooters and drive away. 

[Prepuce of Doom 20,954]

19 hours ago, Jameslaw121 said:

Yesterday, and the grocery store, in one aisle I had three different women put their cart in the very center of the aisle while shopping. Three different times I had to say excuse me for them to move the damn cart. 

Grab the nearest product off the shelf and add one (or many more) to the offending cart. 

[Richard Kimball 1,492]

Desktop Macs have a rechargeable mouse. Apparently, they don't want you using the mouse while it's charging, so they put the charging connection on the bottom, and the computer doesn't tell you the mouse battery is low until there's about fifteen minutes left. 

Apple died as an innovative company with Steve Jobs. 

[Underdog 28,382]

3 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

Grab the nearest product off the shelf and add one (or many more) to the offending cart. 

Condoms.  Follow them to checkout and wait for the hilarity to begin.  Profit. 

[elfenix 34,161]

people smashing down bluebonnets to get pics of their fuck trophies in them

[RPM 26,167]

3 hours ago, Underdog said:

Condoms.  Follow them to checkout and wait for the hilarity to begin.  Profit. 

Those are usually kept locked up or behind the counter. Lice shampoo is what your looking for.

[Guest]

On 4/2/2021 at 2:06 PM, Jameslaw121 said:

Yesterday, and the grocery store, in one aisle I had three different women put their cart in the very center of the aisle while shopping. Three different times I had to say excuse me for them to move the damn cart. 

People do not give a fuck about others, whether they are on a cart or shopping with a regular one.

The inclination to just run these people the fuck over keeps growing inside.

 

GET THE FUCK OUT OF OTHER PEOPLE'S WAY, MOTHERFUCKERS. Stay the fuck at the house...

Edited April 3, 2021 by slorch

[Guest]

2 hours ago, elfenix said:

people smashing down bluebonnets to get pics of their fuck trophies in them

That's what the rattlesnakes are for...

[Jameslaw121 4,440]

2 hours ago, slorch said:

People do not give a fuck about others, whether they are on a cart or shopping with a regular one.

The inclination to just run these people the fuck over keeps growing inside.

 

GET THE FUCK OUT OF OTHER PEOPLE'S WAY, MOTHERFUCKERS. Stay the fuck at the house...

These people were all of @Armybrat's generation. And I just can't get angry like I would with a 20 something

[nnm 35,881]

12 minutes ago, slorch said:

That's what the rattlesnakes are for...

 

[Jameslaw121 4,440]

When the gas station pump print receipt is out of paper....

[Guest]

1 minute ago, Jameslaw121 said:

These people were all of @Armybrat's generation. And I just can't get angry like I would with a 20 something

old white women are the rudest of all grocery customers.   No fucks given.  Ever.   LOL

 

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

1 hour ago, slorch said:

old white women are the rudest of all grocery customers.   No fucks given.  Ever.   LOL

 

Have you never run in to an angry black woman ?  They scare the shit out of me.

[Guest]

8 minutes ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

Have you never run in to an angry black woman ?  They scare the shit out of me.

Not even in the same category.  Seriously

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

1 minute ago, slorch said:

Not even in the same category.  Seriously

Ahh so you haven't.  White women are all bluster. You mess with an angry balk woman, and you get the proverbial horns.

[Guest]

Just now, Onboard 2.0 said:

Ahh so you haven't.  White women are all bluster. You mess with an angry balk woman, and you get the proverbial horns.

Old white women will run your ass over...

and then cuss you for slowing them down.

Axe anyone who work in the public...

[Jerry Callo 8,645]

Hotel hair dryers. A lot of noise, but not a lot of oomph.
I'll begrudgingly use them to dry my daughter's hair, but it takes twice as long as using my wife's Dyson.

My wife's friend that let her try a $300 fucking hairdryer.

[WhatTheBuck 28,696]

14 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

Grab the nearest product off the shelf and add one (or many more) to the offending cart. 

When I got to the checkout lane, I’d just omit that item. I’d know that wasn’t on my list. If you want to fuck with someone, take something out of their cart. They probably won’t notice it’s missing when they check out. They won’t figure it out until after they get home. They could’ve sworn they picked that up.

That would be the better way to fuck with me, anyway. 

[General Specific 3,208]

I'm not familiar with the sex term "rusted Peterbilt"

Old truckers never die. They just get a new Peterbilt!

[Underdog 28,382]

13 hours ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

Have you never run in to an angry black woman ?  They scare the shit out of me.

[DougO 5,238]

23 hours ago, elfenix said:

people smashing down bluebonnets to get pics of their fuck trophies in them

 

People with fuck trophies. I can't even get a participation certificate.

[TornACL 7,666]

This iPhone commercial where the lady is fumbling her phone, that God damn ridiculous drum and babble background noise makes me want to murder someone. 

It doesn't help that mlb.tv seemingly runs that ad every half inning. 

[El Diablo 4,232]

On 4/3/2021 at 3:55 PM, elfenix said:

people smashing down bluebonnets to get pics of their fuck trophies in them

Yesterday. Small, local wildflower park. They were everywhere, walking right past the signs asking that they stay on the trails.

 

[nnm 35,881]

5 hours ago, TornACL said:

This iPhone commercial where the lady is fumbling her phone, that God damn ridiculous drum and babble background noise makes me want to murder someone. 

It doesn't help that mlb.tv seemingly runs that ad every half inning. 

 

[SHOOTER12 8,776]

On 3/26/2021 at 5:33 PM, UpperWestside said:

I have had to explain the username a few times. Short version is I liked hanging out over there because I used to go to the AMC by Lincoln Center and I love the Natural History Museum. I would not live over there though. I prefer an area with a vibrant culture (Puerto Ricans are pretty awesome people!) like the one in my neighborhood.

Should have moved up to the Eastside Mr. Jefferson

[UpperWestside 6,080]

7 minutes ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Should have moved up to the Eastside Mr. Jefferson

Ha. I’m good with El Barrio.  Kinda cool walking past that building occasionally because it brings the show to mind. I wonder how many folks know he spent the last twenty odd years of his life living a simple and quiet one in El Paso. I had a friend some years back who remembered him living in her neighborhood and she said he would just walk to the grocery store and was nice to everyone.

Edited April 6, 2021 by UpperWestside

[SHOOTER12 8,776]

On 4/1/2021 at 10:01 AM, Cheeseweasel said:

Swizzlefinger is your best bet.

Dats what your mom said

[SHOOTER12 8,776]

On 4/2/2021 at 11:12 AM, Cheeseweasel said:

Pure fuck around and find out, right there.

Only if he really brakes, better to just slowly ease off the gas pedal....

[SHOOTER12 8,776]

On 4/2/2021 at 1:45 PM, Superhero said:

A couple of Amazon Echo things...

Me: "Alexa, go to... "
Kids yelling over me: "Alexa tell a knock knock joke", "Alexa, how old are you?", "Alexa, drop in on mommy"
 

Me: "Alexa, play music by Steely Dan"
Kids within 5 seconds "Alexa, play Kidz Bop Kidz"
 

Like pretty much everything I own/do. As soon as I start using something, they'll run over and try to take over. FML.

Somebody's kids need their disrespectful little asses torn up.

[TornACL 7,666]

1 hour ago, nnm said:

 

Is Nitin Swahney in prison? If not, what's the hold up?

[davidg 4,019]

Yesterday. Small, local wildflower park. They were everywhere, walking right past the signs asking that they stay on the trails.

 

Ma’am, you might want to keep the kids on the trail as you don’t want to disturb the snakes

[Cheeseweasel 26,437]

On 4/3/2021 at 3:55 PM, elfenix said:

people smashing down bluebonnets to get pics of their fuck trophies in them

But how will people on Facebook know that I have perfect children who dress like 19th century dandies? 

[DigglerontheHoof 20,950]

22 minutes ago, Cheeseweasel said:

But how will people on Facebook know that I have perfect children who dress like 19th century dandies? 

posrep for dandies; great word

[Vic Mackey 46,848]

Unsubscribing from email lists. Saying it will take anywhere from 2-10 days to take me off the list. Yet the second I sign up for one, I get bombarded. Fuck off.

[Gatorubet 30,011]

That's a good way to get a rusted Peterbilt ramming your ass.

 

Great movie. No dialogue.

[Superhero 8,696]

14 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Somebody's kids need their disrespectful little asses torn up.

I try to not physically discipline the kids. But they get one of these whenever they annoy the shit out of me. 

[nnm 35,881]

Idiot drivers merging onto a full-speed interstate, with plenty of space between vehicles, who assume they have the right of way, not the vehicles on the highway. These days I’m doing a lot of back and forth between Dallas and Tyler, and these idiots are legion. Many times the semi has no where to go because the left lane is occupied. 
On Sunday evening, I was driving on 290 westbound, at Waller. Right before the Buc-ees exit, a semi was about halfway into a car that was parallel to the truck. It was right after the preceding entrance ramp. I got to the scene about 1/2 hour after it happened and emergency personnel were ripping the windshield off to get to the driver. Although I didn’t see the accident happen, it was pretty easy to figure out. Truly, F around and find out. 

[NeverMarryAStripper 21,780]

Got a summons today to appear in Houston City Court as a witness.  The fuckstick that rear ended me on I10 and totaled my car is contesting his ticket.  I’m going to ask for the death penalty.

[Prepuce of Doom 20,954]

20 hours ago, Gatorubet said:

Great movie. No dialogue.

"Radiator hose!!!" counts as dialogue. 

[nnm 35,881]

8 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Got a summons today to appear in Houston City Court as a witness.  The fuckstick that rear ended me on I10 and totaled my car is contesting his ticket.  I’m going to ask for the death penalty.

 

Edited April 7, 2021 by nnm

[closetohumping 17,342]

People that drive with them halogen lights.  fuckfaces.

[52-80 19,046]

paying 3-5$ for a pot/bunch of fresh herbs at the grocery stores when all you need is a few sprigs.  cilantro and basil ill often use the whole thing, but most everything else requires just a tiny bit.

ive tried growing them at home to have a perpetual supply, but its never works out that well (thyme is decently easy to maintain). 

im sure i buy plenty of groceries that is more wasteful, but nothing feels as wasteful as having to buy herbs.