Trivial Things That Make You Surly

[CooterBrown 18006]

Holy fuck, it is impossible to get a kid a learners permit.

The kid needs a government issued photo ID, two different household bills or a fucking property deed, the actual social security card, birth certificate, a letter from the school to verify attendance and grades, and the form showing completion of the classroom portion of drivers Ed.

Seriously WTF. I don’t need 90% of that to get her a CHL.

[NeverMarryAStripper 21899]

I'm pretty sure all I needed for my son was a passport, school attendance letter, and driver's ed completion certificate. 

[Fudbelty 2788]

I renewed this year and had to have a Birth Certificate or Passport. How the fuck did I get and keep my license 25 years without ever verifying that stuff?

[CooterBrown 18006]

I'm pretty sure all I needed for my son was a passport, school attendance letter, and driver's ed completion certificate. 

I just left the DPS office. I left out some other stuff they requested. They also requested all vehicle insurance cards and registration, a school ID to prove she’s the person on the school attendance letter, parent ID, and I have to sign an affidavit stating that she lives at the address on everything since no bills are in her name.

[Guest Lobo]

You didn’t put your home’s gas bill in your 15 year old daughter’s name?  What kind of an asshole father are you?  

[DougO 5243]

When you buy some shit at HEB and it comes with a coupon for some other free shit with the shit you were buying anyway, but it's somewhere else in the store and you look all over the store and can't find it, and finally you ask some flunky employee in the store where the F the free shit is and he tells you, but of course, that spot where the free shit is completely empty because all the free shit was already taken...and shit.

[elfenix 34231]

HEB app and website tells you the aisle. 

app is named "My HEB" rather than "HEB" so, if you forget that, you start looking in the H's to find no HEB app which you swear you've downloaded

[NeverMarryAStripper 21899]

I would rather put my nuts on a concrete block and smash them with a hammer than deal with Comcast.  Fuck them in their goat ass.

Edited January 8, 2022 by NeverMarryAStripper

[Underdog 28614]

36 minutes ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

I would rather put my nuts on a concrete block and smash them with a hammer

 

 

[52-80 19150]

Cold toilet seats in the winter. 
 

i got heated bathroom floor but need one of them fancy japanese toto seat warmers. Its uncivilized without one. 

[nnm 36364]

2 hours ago, 52-80 said:

Cold toilet seats in the winter. 
 

i got heated bathroom floor but need one of them fancy japanese toto seat warmers. Its uncivilized without one. 

BioBidet 2000. You’re welcome. 
 

Bio Bidet 2000

Was $699

Now $471  w/ Code NEWYEAR

[elfenix 34231]

people who announce to the office that they're going to the restroom. every. god. damn. time.

[Guest]

The "popped positive" or "popped hot" mentions in the covid threads. No, you tested positive for COVID. You got COVID. You were infected with COVID. Stop trying to sound like you're some sort of badass because you got sick.

 

[ztejas 43418]

40 minutes ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

The "popped positive" or "popped hot" mentions in the covid threads. No, you tested positive for COVID. You got COVID. You were infected with COVID. Stop trying to sound like you're some sort of badass because you got sick.

 

On you for reading the covid threads. 

[Gil Bang 25944]

Watching Bama/GA.  Fucking douche QB for GA has "Bennett IV" on the back of his jersey.

 

Listen here, you stupid cunt.  "Bennett IV" isn't your last name.  Your fucking last name is "Bennett".  The "IV" modifies your first name, not your last name, you fucking cock. 

[Mrs Whiggins 13050]

47 minutes ago, Gil Bang said:

Watching Bama/GA.  Fucking douche QB for GA has "Bennett IV" on the back of his jersey.

 

Listen here, you stupid cunt.  "Bennett IV" isn't your last name.  Your fucking last name is "Bennett".  The "IV" modifies your first name, not your last name, you fucking cock. 

If the person labeling the uniforms had just put "Hat" everyone would've known who it was and it only takes three letters. Easy peasy.

[achooloco 1067]

1 hour ago, Gil Bang said:

Watching Bama/GA.  Fucking douche QB for GA has "Bennett IV" on the back of his jersey.

 

Listen here, you stupid cunt.  "Bennett IV" isn't your last name.  Your fucking last name is "Bennett".  The "IV" modifies your first name, not your last name, you fucking cock. 

Stupid question amnesty, isn’t it modifying the entire name? As in if you have a different middle name you aren’t really a II, III, IV, etc? 

[Tonesky 934]

22 minutes ago, achooloco said:

Stupid question amnesty, isn’t it modifying the entire name? As in if you have a different middle name you aren’t really a II, III, IV, etc? 

This is correct. But, his last name is still just Bennett. 

[Blotto 23498]

I blame this guy

[52-80 19150]

14 hours ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

The "popped positive" or "popped hot" mentions in the covid threads. No, you tested positive for COVID. You got COVID. You were infected with COVID. Stop trying to sound like you're some sort of badass because you got sick.

 

welcome to the Winter of the Popped Hots

[956 Worldwide 34705]

14 hours ago, elfenix said:

people who announce to the office that they're going to the restroom. every. god. damn. time.

A automatic timer recently got installed in my office shitter (I do not know who was asking) and it is timed too short for my morning shit. I don't know who decided the length for it, but it goes off right when I am about to wipe, necessitating some squirming on the throne to get it to come back on. No windows, so this is serious business and absolutely enrages me.

[CooterBrown 18006]

Levi’s inconsistent sizing. I can understand a bit of inconsistency…maybe .5-.75 inches in a waist or inseam. But fuck, I just bought 2 pairs of the same size 514s and they fit dramatically different. One pair is so much smaller that I can’t get within 3 inches of buttoning them while the other one is a bit loose in the waist.

I don’t give a shit if one pair is made in Mexico and one in China. An inch is an inch anywhere in the world. It shouldn’t be this difficult to make pants the correct size.

[Guest Lobo]

35 minutes ago, CooterBrown said:

An inch is an inch anywhere in South Austin's Mom.  

FIFY

[Incredulity 11666]

38 minutes ago, CooterBrown said:

Levi’s inconsistent sizing. I can understand a bit of inconsistency…maybe .5-.75 inches in a waist or inseam. But fuck, I just bought 2 pairs of the same size 514s and they fit dramatically different. One pair is so much smaller that I can’t get within 3 inches of buttoning them while the other one is a bit loose in the waist.

I don’t give a shit if one pair is made in Mexico and one in China. An inch is an inch anywhere in the world. It shouldn’t be this difficult to make pants the correct size.

 

 

A simple mismatch in demand/supply fixed by sewing a different tag on the inventory.

 

[Onboard 2.0 9083]

46 minutes ago, CooterBrown said:

Levi’s inconsistent sizing. I can understand a bit of inconsistency…maybe .5-.75 inches in a waist or inseam. But fuck, I just bought 2 pairs of the same size 514s and they fit dramatically different. One pair is so much smaller that I can’t get within 3 inches of buttoning them while the other one is a bit loose in the waist.

I don’t give a shit if one pair is made in Mexico and one in China. An inch is an inch anywhere in the world. It shouldn’t be this difficult to make pants the correct size.

Levis are turning into shit now.  I've only worn Levis since jr. high school, but the quality/quality control is just about gone.

[Js1 85313]

3 hours ago, 956 Worldwide said:

A automatic timer recently got installed in my office shitter (I do not know who was asking) and it is timed too short for my morning shit. I don't know who decided the length for it, but it goes off right when I am about to wipe, necessitating some squirming on the throne to get it to come back on. No windows, so this is serious business and absolutely enrages me.

Fucking micromanaging bullshit. 

[NeverMarryAStripper 21899]

3 hours ago, 956 Worldwide said:

A automatic timer recently got installed in my office shitter (I do not know who was asking) and it is timed too short for my morning shit. I don't know who decided the length for it, but it goes off right when I am about to wipe, necessitating some squirming on the throne to get it to come back on. No windows, so this is serious business and absolutely enrages me.

This confuses me.  There is a timer on your office shitter that goes off when it decides that you have spent enough time on the throne?

[956 Worldwide 34705]

27 minutes ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

This confuses me.  There is a timer on your office shitter that goes off when it decides that you have spent enough time on the throne?

Oh damn. I reread it and my rage made it confusing.

Someone installed a timer/motion sensor on the light so it goes out unless you’re moving and it’s timed way too short. 

[Js1 85313]

21 minutes ago, 956 Worldwide said:

Oh damn. I reread it and my rage made it confusing.

Someone installed a timer/motion sensor on the light so it goes out unless you’re moving and it’s timed way too short. 

Same purpose as a "timer" - basically trying to speed up your bathroom breaks by turning the lights off for sitting on the crapper for too long. 

Edited January 11, 2022 by Js1

[52-80 19150]

2 hours ago, CooterBrown said:

Levi’s inconsistent sizing. I can understand a bit of inconsistency…maybe .5-.75 inches in a waist or inseam. But fuck, I just bought 2 pairs of the same size 514s and they fit dramatically different. One pair is so much smaller that I can’t get within 3 inches of buttoning them while the other one is a bit loose in the waist.

I don’t give a shit if one pair is made in Mexico and one in China. An inch is an inch anywhere in the world. It shouldn’t be this difficult to make pants the correct size.

ever bought levis Shrink to Fit?  holy hell what the f

[956 Worldwide 34705]

6 minutes ago, Js1 said:

Same purpose as a "timer" - basically trying to speed up your bathroom breaks by turning the lights off for sitting on the crapper for too long. 

No one in our building is punching in and out.  We have been getting lots of reminders about the cost of energy and greening/sustainability.  That’s what it is, I think. 

[NeverMarryAStripper 21899]

If you're just shitting and surfing surly you can do that in the dark

[Laxtonto 12080]

5 minutes ago, 956 Worldwide said:

No one in our building is punching in and out.  We have been getting lots of reminders about the cost of energy and greening/sustainability.  That’s what it is, I think. 

People don’t realize how much those motion sensors save. They are really easy to install and relativity cheap, so the ROI is huge.

 

If the added bonus is that it gets employees to stop shitting on company time, so be it. The real money maker is both the saved electricity and the LEED certification tax breaks they can get with them…

[Sandman 3403]

What's worse is when some moron athlete has a newborn or toddler and puts "SR" on the back of his uniform. Hey fuckface, your stupid son ain't on the team. Nobody's worried about getting the two of you mixed up. 

[Guest Lobo]

Ken Griffey III says..."YOU WRONG!"

[Stella Link 534]

When you are walking into HEB (in a hurry) and the person in front of you STOPS dead in their tracks in the middle of the door entrance, blocking the entrance, to look at their grocery list or answer their phone.  

Normally this happens with a line of people (and carts) behind you.  

 

 

[Guest]

20 hours ago, FirstTimeCaller said:

The "popped positive" or "popped hot" mentions in the covid threads. No, you tested positive for COVID. You got COVID. You were infected with COVID. Stop trying to sound like you're some sort of badass because you got sick.

 

It's very much in the vernacular of prior service folks who laughed at the dumbasses who blew it on  a piss test.  It doesn't convey toughness or badassery at all.

Why you so skeered, mouse?

[CooterBrown 18006]

2 hours ago, 52-80 said:

ever bought levis Shrink to Fit?  holy hell what the f

I used to get those in high school in the 80s.  IIRC, you bought 1" bigger in the waist and 3" longer on the inseam.  

[mininghorn88 2282]

People who light up a cigarette upon exiting their vehicle and then walk maybe 100 feet to the entrance to a store to only then casually flick their still burning and barely smoked cigarette onto the ground.

In summary; People who litter.

[Underdog 28614]

^ We should be allowed to shoot smokers/litterbugs.  

[JOSEYWALES66 1801]

Folding a fitted sheet is the work of the devil.

 

 

[NeverMarryAStripper 21899]

 

[WhatTheBuck 28777]

3 hours ago, mininghorn88 said:

People who light up a cigarette upon exiting their vehicle and then walk maybe 100 feet to the entrance to a store to only then casually flick their still burning and barely smoked cigarette onto the ground.

In summary; People who litter.

Worse yet is when you’re a smoker and someone bums a cigarette from you then does something like that, littering or not. I don’t care if they crush it out in an ashtray, smoke the whole damn cigarette or don’t ask for one. 

[Biff Tannen 45676]

6 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

If you're just shitting and surfing surly you can do that in the dark

[Brothahorn 10087]

HEB app and website tells you the aisle. 
app is named "My HEB" rather than "HEB" so, if you forget that, you start looking in the H's to find no HEB app which you swear you've downloaded

Happened to me several times. Then when I finally get to the app, it's set for pickup. So now I have to figure out how to change that shit.

[NeverMarryAStripper 21899]

4 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said:

Worse yet is when you’re a smoker and someone bums a cigarette from you then does something like that, littering or not. I don’t care if they crush it out in an ashtray, smoke the whole damn cigarette or don’t ask for one. 

Back when I smoked if I was smoking and someone asked to bum a cigarette I would always respond with sorry I don’t smoke

[NWBuck 8552]

8 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

 

They yadda yadda yadda'd past the hard part between 58 and 59 seconds

[Underdog 28614]

16 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Back when I smoked if I was smoking and someone asked to bum a cigarette I would always respond with sorry I don’t smoke

Should go full Cousin Eddie on Clark and give them the cig you were smoking and light up a new one for yourself.

[Paper_jam 831]

I need to combine some large documents in Word and maintain the original formatting, headers, page numbering etc. and it's driving me fucking insane. Why can't Word just merge two separate documents into one while keeping all the shit the way it was? I swear this was easier with Word circa 1997 than it is with Word 2019.

 

[Biff Tannen 45676]

3 hours ago, Paper_jam said:

I need to combine some large documents in Word and maintain the original formatting, headers, page numbering etc. and it's driving me fucking insane. Why can't Word just merge two separate documents into one while keeping all the shit the way it was? I swear this was easier with Word circa 1997 than it is with Word 2019.

 

So would you say you need to jam the two papers together?  I'll show myself out.