Trivial Things That Make You Surly

[WhatTheBuck 28771]

4 hours ago, elfenix said:

is she still going? 

 

who was the other amateurish chick from back then? heather deep throats or something?  edit: ideepthroat i think it was

Heather Harmon. Too bad she was working when internet bandwidth limitations only allowed for short, tiny videos. 

http://thoughtcatalog.com/hersh-bavnik/2013/12/the-legend-of-heather-i-deepthroat-an-incomplete-story-of-americas-greatest-porn-star/

[William_Cannon 86]

Wet socks drive me insane. Don’t know why but I hate it

[Celery Man 20929]

Wet socks drive me insane. Don’t know why but I hate it

 

A) expand on this. You mean like, your socks become wet, and then you don’t change or otherwise remove your socks when you’re done doing the thing that got them wet? Is this a regular thing?

 

B )

 

[NorthLoop 14180]

Heating up a plate of leftovers, and the mashed potatoes take like 3x as long to get hot as the rest of the food. 

[DougO 5243]

9 hours ago, Vic Mackey said:

The terms:

Wifey
Hubby
Bae

I hate bae.

[DougO 5243]

When HEB is out of diet Wild Red 12-pack cans, which is frequent...when they're open.

[ButtFumble 5164]

stores that put out their own store coupon for shit that they do not stock in the store

who in the fuck lets that shit happen

[52-80 19142]

26 minutes ago, ButtFumble said:

stores that put out their own store coupon for shit that they do not stock in the store

who in the fuck lets that shit happen

Stores that want you to come in but don't want to lose money on sales

[Lone Star Horn 2016]

8 hours ago, NorthLoop said:

Heating up a plate of leftovers, and the mashed potatoes take like 3x as long to get hot as the rest of the food. 

If you flatten the mashed potatoes, spread out on the plate, they'll heat up just as fast. Then you can reshape them to your liking.

[Cheeseweasel 26438]

9 minutes ago, Lone Star Horn said:

If you flatten the mashed potatoes, spread out on the plate, they'll heat up just as fast. Then you can reshape them to your liking.

"Everywhere I look, something reminds me of her"

-Frank Drebin

[beer 3220]

On 3/28/2018 at 11:43 AM, Lou said:

Baby on board signs on cars.

[GoPokes83 2240]

Fat models that are now included in every clothing ad on TV.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[SilasCoade 2622]

7 hours ago, GoPokes83 said:

Fat models that are now included in every clothing ad on TV.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Seriously, what happened to media being aspirational rather than delusional?

[ButtFumble 5164]

vehicles with "sports exhaust" that are slow as shit driven by people that are equally slow as shit

lowered trucks especially a dually

Edited April 6, 2018 by ButtFumble

[TornACL 7698]

On 4/4/2018 at 7:28 AM, Okie State said:

Piece of shit stoplights that go out every time it rains.

What is the deal with this shit. Tarrant County is lousy with this problem. 

We have put men on the moon, you'd think we could engineer a stop light that is water resistant. 

[Degenerate Gardner 4085]

Rampant anti-intellectualism is killing the semicolon; this shit sucks.

[plvhorn 25]

People who get into a crowded elevator and face the rear of the elevator car. Heaven forbid it is on a low floor and then you have 20-30 floors worth of awkward eye contact ahead of you. 

[Frank The Tank 1496]

What kind of fucking psychopath does this? I’ve never seen this happen in my entire life. 

[Player 4575]

The word “methinks” and most of the assholes who use it. “Methinks they should put in Applewhite over Simms.” “Chiles should start, methinks.”

Listen up little lord fuckface. You’re not impressing anyone with your mastery of the Queen’s English, and you sure as shit aren’t going to be mistaken for the Bard. You mostly come across as the dipshit who’s trying way too hard at the renfest.

[deadshank 24652]

5 minutes ago, Player said:

The word “methinks” and most of the assholes who use it. “Methinks they should put in Applewhite over Simms.” “Chiles should start, methinks.”

Listen up little lord fuckface. You’re not impressing anyone with your mastery of the Queen’s English, and you sure as shit aren’t going to be mistaken for the Bard. You mostly come across as the dipshit who’s trying way too hard at the renfest.


 

Couldst you explain more? 

[Celery Man 20929]

same deal but with plethora.  people think they're pulling out something arcane and "smart" but it's just a stupid ugly word.

[PvilleStang 2875]

^^^ 

[Cheeseweasel 26438]

1 hour ago, Celery Man said:

same deal but with plethora.  people think they're pulling out something arcane and "smart" but it's just a stupid ugly word.

It's a sweater!

[lateshow 1304]

3 hours ago, deadshank said:

Couldst you explain more? 

Read betwixt the lines.

[Lou 264]

People that say let's dialogue about that.

[GhostRider 169]

2 minutes ago, Lou said:

People that say let's dialogue about that.

We'll just put a pin that.

[ShaggyBevo RIP 3868]

On 3/31/2018 at 9:51 PM, Incredulity said:

Full size SUV with a Thule box on top.

Should have bought a minivan if they wanted to take shit with them.

[GoPokes83 2240]

People that call their pets their fur babies.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

[PvilleStang 2875]

People who still have their tapa sig turned on...

[Biff Tannen 45661]

4 hours ago, Lou said:

People that say let's dialogue about that.

The amount of rage that just boiled within me was palpable.

[Okie State 3804]

The phrase "in this space".

Heard this for the first time at work this week. Immediately thought of this thread.

[Guest]

Not being able to leave a comment on rep. Yes, even on the pos rep, it was a chance to make another funny or just tell someone why you liked/ disliked it.

[WhatTheBuck 28771]

9 hours ago, Celery Man said:

same deal but with plethora.  people think they're pulling out something arcane and "smart" but it's just a stupid ugly word.

Do you know what it means to have a plethora?

[Guest]

That's a fake leather hat like Tom Landry wore, right?

[Steamboat1874 4048]

[Judge Roybeanbag 11819]

57 minutes ago, slorch said:

That's a fake leather hat like Tom Landry wore, right?

Naw that was a feathora. 

[ButtFumble 5164]

getting an email from Freebirds on 4-7-2018 letting me know that 4-5-2018 is National Burrito Day and telling me about the offers they will have to celebrate that

fucking idiots

[BurntOrangeCrush 1011]

A few of my senior executives will send me an email telling me they will need my answer COB (close of business) or EOD (end of day). Then they use lowercase initials of their first and last name to sign off.

Because, you know, they are way to busy to type their full name.

[ButtFumble 5164]

2 minutes ago, BurntOrangeCrush said:

A few of my senior executives will send me an email telling me they will need my answer COB (close of business) or EOD (end of day). Then they use lowercase initials of their first and last name to sign off.

Because, you know, they are way to busy to type their full name.

 

forward that to your IT guy and ask him to show those dumb shits how to place a signature in their email

[El Diablo 4232]

9 minutes ago, ButtFumble said:

 

forward that to your IT guy and ask him to show those dumb shits how to place a signature in their email

"Official" company signatures suck balls. A couple months back we were directed to format all email sigs a certain way that includes the corporate logo. This logo appears on recipients emails to be an attachment, not to mention the sig is supposed to include business #, direct #, fax #, office location etc..etc... w/each on a separate line

Fuck you. 2 years ago we were directed to have sigs that were only one line, that is, name, ph# etc.. all on the same line so as to not take up too much vertical space. I liked that. 

This new shit is so stupid and takes up 6 or more lines vertically. Half of the email space is devoted to my fucking signature. Retards.

Edited April 8, 2018 by El Diablo

[elfenix 34221]

those poor electrons.

 

 

very trivial. 

[GottaB 594]

You could decrease the font size to reduce the size of the email. /Dilbert

[Redneck Mutha 7953]

On 4/5/2018 at 5:06 AM, ButtFumble said:

stores that put out their own store coupon for shit that they do not stock in the store

who in the fuck lets that shit happen

At HEB yesterday and was buying something that had a coupon to buy this product get another product for free.  Slight problem, they didn't carry the product I was supposed to get for free.

[Llano Estacado 1257]

(Maybe more than trivial as it’s happened to my wife and I the last 3 times out.)

 

People that bring their infants/toddler to a nice restaurant on Friday/Saturday night.

 

Then polite society forces us to smile through your teeth and say “we understand. We’re parents too.”

 

It’s not okay. You know damn well it’s not okay. I don’t know what the cutoff is; $100, white table cloth, no kids menu, I don’t know, but there’s a line and you crossed it.

 

Fuck y’all! You can afford the drinks and plates you can afford a fucking sitter like the rest of us.

 

[Texas007 195]

On 4/6/2018 at 9:36 AM, PvilleStang said:

^^^ 

 

On 4/6/2018 at 9:37 AM, Cheeseweasel said:

It's a sweater!

 

On 4/6/2018 at 6:06 PM, WhatTheBuck said:

Do you know what it means to have a plethora?

It is the preferred nomenclature for requesting if an adequate quantity of pinatas have been aquired (e.g. Would you say we have a plethora of pinatas?)

[Upgrayedd 5810]

Dry ingredients in recipes that are given in volume rather than weight.

[KaiserSoze 998]

The word “methinks” and most of the assholes who use it. “Methinks they should put in Applewhite over Simms.” “Chiles should start, methinks.”

 

Listen up little lord fuckface. You’re not impressing anyone with your mastery of the Queen’s English, and you sure as shit aren’t going to be mistaken for the Bard. You mostly come across as the dipshit who’s trying way too hard at the renfest.

 

 

Yep, those people and the ones who use "whilst" sound like fucking morons.

 

[Cousin Strawberry 1261]

4 hours ago, Llano Estacado said:

(Maybe more than trivial as it’s happened to my wife and I the last 3 times out.)

 

People that bring their infants/toddler to a nice restaurant on Friday/Saturday night.

 

Then polite society forces us to smile through your teeth and say “we understand. We’re parents too.”

 

It’s not okay. You know damn well it’s not okay. I don’t know what the cutoff is; $100, white table cloth, no kids menu, I don’t know, but there’s a line and you crossed it.

 

Fuck y’all! You can afford the drinks and plates you can afford a fucking sitter like the rest of us.

 

Yep.  Go the fuck away, you selfish fucks.  

[ernest_t_bass 1196]

Thick milkshakes... I'm not trying to bring any boys to the yard, so I don't like them thick.  It's been about 30 minutes since I ordered the fucking thing, and I STILL can't drink it.  I'm seriously fucking ragey, to the point I thought about driving back to the shake shack and throwing the fucking thing at the window.  It's either the shake of the piece of shit fucking straw that collapses in every time I try to take a drink.  Serenity fucking now.

[Hunchback 51]

It's either the shake of the piece of shit fucking straw that collapses in every time I try to take a drink.  Serenity fucking now.

You just need to recognize that you don't have a milkshake. You have ice cream. And compared to all the things the guys at shake shack could have put in your cup, ice cream is pretty good.