Trivial Things That Make You Surly

[Biff Tannen 45432]

There has been a mosquito in my living room all night long.  Cannot find it, but I keep getting bitten.

[ScottS 1057]

On 6/25/2023 at 11:17 PM, Scheiss Meister said:

There's a reason for that.  As it was told to me, when the boundary between New Mexico and the Texas Panhandle was surveyed, Texas got to hire the surveyors.  They "somehow" got 13 miles off, to the west, of course, from the line that they were supposed to survey.  It was supposed  to line up with the western border of Oklahoma.  The current line was used for a while before New Mexico figured it out and took the dispute to the Supreme Court.  The Court was persuaded that it would cause too much difficulty to sort out private land boundaries, county lines, and back taxes, so they let it stand.  At least, that what I've been told.  Now I'm going to have to look up the real story.

TL,DR: A state that wouldn't cheat for land don't want it enough.

ETA - According to the Texas Historical Association online handbook entry on borders, the western border of the Texas Panhandle is supposed to be the 103rd meridian.  The surveying "error" was two miles west of the actual 103rd meridian.  Congress confirmed that boundary as surveyed in a joint resolution on February 16, 1911.

I think this may have posted somewhere else on Surly.  Seems like the kind of thing you would find interesting.

Colorado is not a rectangle - it has 697 sides

Quote

AMERICA LOVES ITS STRAIGHT-LINE BORDERS. The only U.S. state without one is Hawaii—for obvious reasons.

West of the Mississippi, states are bigger, emptier, and boxier than back east. From a distance, all seem to be made up of straight lines.

Only when you zoom in do you see their squiggly bits: the northeast corner of Kansas, for instance. Or Montana’s western border with Idaho that looks like a human face. Or Oklahoma’s southern border with Texas, meandering as it follows the Red River.

New Mexico comes tantalizingly close to having only straight-line borders. There’s that short stretch north of El Paso that would have been just 15 miles (24 kilometers) long if it were straight instead of wavy.

No, there are only three states whose borders are entirely made up of straight lines: Utah, which would have been a rectangle if Wyoming hadn’t bitten a chunk out of its northeastern corner; Wyoming itself; and Colorado.

Except that they aren’t. for two distinct reasons: because the earth is round, and because those 19th-century surveyors laying out state borders made mistakes.

Congress defined the borders of Colorado as a geospherical rectangle, stretching from 37°N to 41°N latitude, and from 25°W to 32°W longitude. While lines of latitude run in parallel circles that don’t meet, lines of longitude converge at the poles.

This means that Colorado’s longitudinal borders are slightly farther apart in the south. So if you’d look closely enough, the state resembles an isosceles trapezoid rather than a rectangle. Consequently, the state’s northern borderline is about 22 miles (35 kilometers) shorter than its southern one. The same goes, mutatis mutandis, for Wyoming.

That’s not where the story ends. There’s boundary delimitation: the theoretical description of a border, as described above. But what’s more relevant is boundary demarcation: surveying and marking out the border on the ground. Colorado entered the Union in 1876.

Only in 1879 did the first boundary survey team get around to translating Congress’s abstract into actual boundary markers. The official border would not be the delimited one, but the demarcated one. Unfortunately, 19th-century surveyors lacked satellites and other high-precision measurement tools.

Let’s not be too harsh: considering the size of the task and the limitation of their tools—magnetic compasses and metal chains—they did an incredible job. They had to stake straight lines irrespective of terrain, often through inhospitable land.

But yes, errors were made—and were in fact quite habitual. Take, for example, the 49th parallel, which for more than 1,200 miles forms the international border between the United States and Canada. Rather than being a straight line, it zigzags between the 912 boundary monuments established by successive teams of surveyors (the last ones in 1872–74). The markers deviate by as much as 575 feet north and 784 feet south of the actual parallel line.

The same kind of thing happened when the first surveying teams went out to demarcate the Colorado border. These maps magnify some of the most egregious surveying inaccuracies, where the difference between the boundaries delineated by Congress and the border demarcated by the surveyors is greatest.

Four Corners (and Four More)

Located in a dusty, desolate corner of the desert, the Four Corners monument seems very far from the middle of anything. Yet this is the meeting point of four states: Utah, Colorado, New Mexico and Arizona. It is the only quadripoint in the United States. The monument’s exact location is at 36°59’56″N, 109°02’43″W.

However, it’s not where Congress had decreed the four states to meet. That point is about 560 feet (170 meters) northwest of the quadripoint’s current location, at 37°N, 109°02’48″W. Did you drive all the way through the desert to miss the actual point by a few hundred feet?

No, you didn’t: In 1925, the Supreme Court ruled that the borders as surveyed were the correct ones. But perhaps the original quadripoint deserves a small marker of its own, if only to provide the site with an extra attraction. Or why not go for three? Some sources say the original point deviates by 1,807 feet (551 meters).

The La Sal/Paradox Deviation

In 1879, a survey party marched north from Four Corners, placing markers at every mile. The surveyors eventually reached the Wyoming border, but not where they thought they’d end up. Later surveys, in 1885 and 1893, found out where the original surveyors had gone wrong, but by that time the border as surveyed had become the official one. Changing it would have required both Colorado and Utah to agree on a solution, and Congress to approve it.

The biggest error occurs just south of the road connecting La Sal, Utah to Paradox, Colorado. Across an eight-mile stretch, the surveyors strayed westward before regaining true north. The resulting deviation is 3860 feet (1.18 kilometers).

Things Go South After Edith

West to east, Colorado’s border with New Mexico starts out fairly straight. However, just east of Edith, the border swerves southeast for about 3,400 feet (1 kilometer) before resuming its course due east, now 2,820 feet (860 meters) farther south than before.

Why? It seems that for once, the surveyors have given in to the dictates of topography: the deviation follows a small valley oriented northwest-southeast.

Panhandling Into Oklahoma

Almost at the end of their surveying mission, it seems the party lost the plot again. In the last 53 miles (85 kilometers) before the border turns north, the stretch where Colorado rubs against Oklahoma, the line again swerves to the south, by as much as 1,770 feet (540 meters).

Don’t blame the terrain: Appropriately for a place so close to the Oklahoma Panhandle, it’s as flat as a pancake. Perhaps the surveyors were confused by the very featurelessness of the place.

Colorado Is a 697-Sider

These are just four of the biggest, most easily spotted surveying errors. In total, Colorado’s borders have hundreds twists and turns—most much smaller than the Big Four.

Accordingly, the state has not just four sides, but a total of 697 sides. So if Colorado is not a rectangle, what is it? Well, not a pentagon, (Greek for 5-sider), hexagon (6-sider), or a heptagon (7-sider), but a—hold on to something—hexahectaenneacontakaiheptagon (697-sider).

Don’t Get Your Hopes Up, Wyoming

With Colorado thoroughly disqualified to as one of America’s two truly rectangular states, does that leave Wyoming holding the crown all on its own? Nope. Turns out the surveyors who plotted the Equality State’s outline were just as fallible as the Colorado set. Interestingly, Wyoming’s deviations shown come in pairs, whereby the second ones seem to correct the deviation of the first ones.

So, while Wyoming is just as imperfect as Colorado, it does seem that at least it is better at admitting (and correcting) its mistakes than its southern neighbor.

 

[Sam Lin 3539]

5 hours ago, Biff Tannen said:

There has been a mosquito in my living room all night long.  Cannot find it, but I keep getting bitten.

I fucking hate mosquitoes.

[nnm 35873]

11 hours ago, Brothahorn said:

I cannot believe how expensive coolers have become. It's ridiculous. You have to spend more than some folks make in a day if you want something decent. Damn.

I refuse to join the Yeti cult. I have two big $10 styrofoam coolers from Walmart that I’ve been able to keep going for about 5 years. They leak a little but that’s ok. When they break I’ll get some more. 
 

Just checked. They’re now $17.97. Still better than a Yeti. 
https://www.walmart.com/ip/Lifoam-Envirocooler-Huskee-45-Qt-Hard-Sided-Cooler-White/485438903?athbdg=L1103&from=/search

[deadshank 24646]

On 6/25/2023 at 6:12 PM, Texas Jeff said:

The eastern border of New Mexico and Oklahoma is not lined up with the eastern border of New Mexico and Texas.  You can drive north from Texas into New Mexico, take a right, and still be in New Mexico.

Seems like someone screwed up and they just decided to live with it.

Sorry you’re having a difficult time in our kill zone. 
 

-Comanches

[Biff Tannen 45432]

1 hour ago, nnm said:

I refuse to join the Yeti cult. I have two big $10 styrofoam coolers from Walmart that I’ve been able to keep going for about 5 years. They leak a little but that’s ok. When they break I’ll get some more. 
 

Just checked. They’re now $17.97. Still better than a Yeti. 
https://www.walmart.com/ip/Lifoam-Envirocooler-Huskee-45-Qt-Hard-Sided-Cooler-White/485438903?athbdg=L1103&from=/search

Same.  I'm also a lightweight camper, so Yeti is anathema to my needs.

[Cheeseweasel 26437]

1 hour ago, nnm said:

I refuse to join the Yeti cult.

Bigfoot hate needs to stop.

[SHOOTER12 8775]

Folks who constantly change or modify thread titles.

[PvilleStang 2823]

2 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Folks who constantly change or modify thread titties.

This, on the other hand...

[Crapinon 2245]

Liars and thieves. Kenny Rogers lied to me. Next time I'm counting money at the table. I had a woman contact me about playing bagpipes at her mothers funeral. I told her it was $200 and confirmed the time/location. When I arrived this morning she handed me a sealed envelope thank you note, I opened it and saw money in it, but didn't take it out to count it. When I got home, I discovered that she only paid me half. I sent her a text and said "if you lost half of it, I'll repay you later". There is no way I lost half of it because I never took it out of the envelope. I've done this for years and never had anyone pull this shit. She knows I caught her in a lie and I know she has no intention of paying.

[WhatTheBuck 28696]

1 hour ago, Crapinon said:

Liars and thieves. Kenny Rogers lied to me. Next time I'm counting money at the table. I had a woman contact me about playing bagpipes at her mothers funeral. I told her it was $200 and confirmed the time/location. When I arrived this morning she handed me a sealed envelope thank you note, I opened it and saw money in it, but didn't take it out to count it. When I got home, I discovered that she only paid me half. I sent her a text and said "if you lost half of it, I'll repay you later". There is no way I lost half of it because I never took it out of the envelope. I've done this for years and never had anyone pull this shit. She knows I caught her in a lie and I know she has no intention of paying.

Why would you send her a text saying you’d repay her?

[Crapinon 2245]

6 minutes ago, WhatTheBuck said:

Why would you send her a text saying you’d repay her

I sent her one telling her the envelope only had 1/2 the money. She replied that she would pay me the 1/2 that I "lost". I didnt lose it and she knows it. She cheated me and she's not going to pay. 

[WhatTheBuck 28696]

1 minute ago, Crapinon said:

I sent her one telling her the envelope only had 1/2 the money. She replied that she would pay me the 1/2 that I "lost". I didnt lose it and she knows it. She cheated me and she's not going to pay. 

You left out a good chunk of that. Perhaps you’re prone to losing things. Payments, stories about getting paid, etc.  

[Underdog 28381]

Is she hot?  Maybe take it out in trade? 

[Brothahorn 10081]

Liars and thieves. Kenny Rogers lied to me. Next time I'm counting money at the table. I had a woman contact me about playing bagpipes at her mothers funeral. I told her it was $200 and confirmed the time/location. When I arrived this morning she handed me a sealed envelope thank you note, I opened it and saw money in it, but didn't take it out to count it. When I got home, I discovered that she only paid me half. I sent her a text and said "if you lost half of it, I'll repay you later". There is no way I lost half of it because I never took it out of the envelope. I've done this for years and never had anyone pull this shit. She knows I caught her in a lie and I know she has no intention of paying.

Did you eat/drink half of your wages?

[Prepuce of Doom 20954]

Desecrate the gravestone. 

Or at least leave a fake turd on it. 

[Brisketexan 104217]

Desecrate the gravestone. 
Or at least leave a fake turd on it. 

Yep her she has until noon tomorrow to pay up, or you’ll dox her on every website known to man. Nextdoor, Facebook, customer reviews of socks on Walmart.com, outing her as a woman WHO DEFRAUDS PEOPLE WHO PUT ON FUNERALS.
Clock’s ticking, bitch. Tick tock.

[conVINCEd 21468]

There’s a decent chance I know the bagpipe player.  Can’t be too many of those running around with a UT connection.  If it’s who I think it is he’s honest.

[conVINCEd 21468]

2 hours ago, Brisketexan said:

Yep her she has until noon tomorrow to pay up, or you’ll dox her on every website known to man. Nextdoor, Facebook, customer reviews of socks on Walmart.com, outing her as a woman WHO DEFRAUDS PEOPLE WHO PUT ON FUNERALS.
Clock’s ticking, bitch. Tick tock.

To be fair, most of the people involved in the funeral business defraud people on a regular basis.  The bagpipe player is the exception here.  He just agreed to show up and play Amazing Grace for $200.

[Brisketexan 104217]

To be fair, most of the people involved in the funeral business defraud people on a regular basis.  The bagpipe player is the exception here.  He just agreed to show up and play Amazing Grace for $200.

I’d pay him $250 to show up to my funeral and play Baby Got Back on the bagpipes. $300 if he shows up unannounced.

[tx 3 putt 75916]

On 6/29/2023 at 7:35 PM, Okie State said:

On 6/29/2023 at 7:33 PM, Brothahorn said:

I cannot believe how expensive coolers have become. It's ridiculous. You have to spend more than some folks make in a day if you want something decent. Damn.

Well Yeti has a $150 beer bucket and $50 ice scoop that apparently people buy. I blame them.

 

I thought you were bullshitting, then I googled it. Fucking white people !

[Crapinon 2245]

14 hours ago, Underdog said:

Is she hot?  Maybe take it out in trade? 

LOL. Her deceased mother was 98, she was pushing 80. Now her 40ish grandaughter... 

[Crapinon 2245]

13 hours ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

Desecrate the gravestone. 

Or at least leave a fake turd on it. 

She was cremated and taken home. Maybe a dump on her mantle? 

[T’Boo Ted Marshall 2721]

 
I thought you were bullshitting, then I googled it. Fucking white people !

Guess you didn’t see their cast iron skillet..

[Crapinon 2245]

15 hours ago, Brisketexan said:

Yep her she has until noon tomorrow to pay up, or you’ll dox her on every website known to man. Nextdoor, Facebook, customer reviews of socks on Walmart.com, outing her as a woman WHO DEFRAUDS PEOPLE WHO PUT ON FUNERALS.
Clock’s ticking, bitch. Tick tock.

LOL. I get your point but this is her social media presence: 

[Brothahorn 10081]

11 hours ago, tx 3 putt said:

 

I thought you were bullshitting, then I googled it. Fucking white people !

And it's not just Yeti or Taiga. Freaking Coleman and Igloo are selling $300+ coolers. 

 

I finally gave in and bought a $100 igloo for the family(wife). But I haven't used it or cut the tags off yet. It might go back.

[Chad Fuck 17454]

LOL. I get your point but this is her social media presence: 

Say you know where where she lives. You’re going to follow her around alternately playing bagpipes and exclaiming to the world she’s a thief until she pays up. Church. Social clubs. Whatever.

Then do it.

[Crapinon 2245]

Well, hell, faith in humanity is somewhat restored. Sent another note to her saying she could pay cash or we can run a CC. She called me at work and said she was coming right over. Walked in and handed me the cash difference. The funeral director had told me the two sisters were fighting all week over the service and he wasn't going to get between them. At the funeral their families even sat on opposite sides of the church. Her story was that her sister was in charge of payments. She asked me if I thought I might have lost it. I told her I knew it was not there. She said here sister had made some statements supporting the fact that she short paid on purpose and believed me. Either way, I got my money and it will be placed in the buy me a (used) corvette against my wife's wishes, retirement fund. 

[ztejas 43164]

30 minutes ago, Crapinon said:

Well, hell, faith in humanity is somewhat restored. Sent another note to her saying she could pay cash or we can run a CC. She called me at work and said she was coming right over. Walked in and handed me the cash difference. The funeral director had told me the two sisters were fighting all week over the service and he wasn't going to get between them. At the funeral their families even sat on opposite sides of the church. Her story was that her sister was in charge of payments. She asked me if I thought I might have lost it. I told her I knew it was not there. She said here sister had made some statements supporting the fact that she short paid on purpose and believed me. Either way, I got my money and it will be placed in the buy me a (used) corvette against my wife's wishes, retirement fund. 

Oh... fuck...

I had already put a pipe bomb in her mailbox for you. 

[Crapinon 2245]

54 minutes ago, ztejas said:

Oh... fuck...

I had already put a pipe bomb in her mailbox for you. 

I'll tell her it's for her sister. She'll probably deliver it to her.

[GoPokes83 2236]

Party over the weekend at a neighbors bay house. I’ve known the family for 30 years. Grandpa owned a concrete construction company, worked like a young man 6 days a week into his late 70’s. Finally gets too blind to work and hands the company to his son who’d worked for him all his life and knew the business like the back of his hand. Poor dude (son) drowns while wade fishing about 15-17 years ago. When his son reaches 18 he inherits many millions of bucks, he’s probably a little over 30 now. Had to listen to this douche talk down about two of our other neighbors for not having the shit he takes for granted. Laughed out loud at their substandard poor people stuff. Guy’s never held a job or even worked a day in his life! And he’s teaching his kids to be entitled little shits too.

[Brisketexan 104217]

1 hour ago, GoPokes83 said:

Party over the weekend at a neighbors bay house. I’ve known the family for 30 years. Grandpa owned a concrete construction company, worked like a young man 6 days a week into his late 70’s. Finally gets too blind to work and hands the company to his son who’d worked for him all his life and knew the business like the back of his hand. Poor dude (son) drowns while wade fishing about 15-17 years ago. When his son reaches 18 he inherits many millions of bucks, he’s probably a little over 30 now. Had to listen to this douche talk down about two of our other neighbors for not having the shit he takes for granted. Laughed out loud at their substandard poor people stuff. Guy’s never held a job or even worked a day in his life! And he’s teaching his kids to be entitled little shits too.

You left out the part where you pulled the plugs out of his bay boat and pissed in its gas tank.

[tbone_ 14016]

Born on third base, acts like he hit a triple.

[elfenix 34161]

people shooting off fireworks at 1:30 in the morning

[GoPokes83 2236]

You left out the part where you pulled the plugs out of his bay boat and pissed in its gas tank.

His ice chest full of beer.

[nnm 35873]

6 hours ago, elfenix said:

people shooting off fireworks at 1:30 in the morning

Sorry you hate freedom. 

[Guest]

6 hours ago, elfenix said:

people shooting off fireworks at 1:30 in the morning

On June 28th.

3rd and 4th, IDGAF.  This stringing it out horseshit is just stupid.

[nnm 35873]

[52-80 19043]

i have an email address in the form of [first.last]@server , and my name is not that common

more than one people have provided my same address [firstlast]@server , for legitimate non-nefarious purposes.  i dont know how you could do this.  like...errr...i dont have or know my own address, so please just use this one for my Frontier Cable TV account ?????

 

anyway, today i received an email confirmation of a hotel booking, for a stay starting tomorrow.  so through that email link i went ahead and just canceled their reservation.  good luck with the walk-up rates, fuckhead.

[Biff Tannen 45432]

5 hours ago, 52-80 said:

i have an email address in the form of [first.last]@server , and my name is not that common

more than one people have provided my same address [firstlast]@server , for legitimate non-nefarious purposes.  i dont know how you could do this.  like...errr...i dont have or know my own address, so please just use this one for my Frontier Cable TV account ?????

 

anyway, today i received an email confirmation of a hotel booking, for a stay starting tomorrow.  so through that email link i went ahead and just canceled their reservation.  good luck with the walk-up rates, fuckhead.

I have a very unique email (same one since AOL days) and somehow got a reservation confirmation for a Penske rental truck a few months back.  It was some guy in Ohio and he used his own credit card and everything.  No idea how he would have mistakenly put in my email address.  But he apparently returned it in good shape and no one was the wiser.

[Cheeseweasel 26437]

You're not Penske material...

[SurlyGator 856]

Same email issue here, I got a very early Gmail invite and got my name with nothing extra.  I get random crap all the time.  Once I was getting updates from a daycare center on someone's kid, including pictures.  I didnt' want to have a seat over there, so I went to the trouble to track down the daycare center's phone number and let them know their error.

For months I have been getting someone's mileage logs from a trucking company.  Tried multiple times to get them to wise up, but no luck.  I just ignore those now.

[GoPokes83 2236]

On June 28th.
3rd and 4th, IDGAF.  This stringing it out horseshit is just stupid.

No ordinance against it here as we’re in an unincorporated part of the county. Even during burn bans it’s ok to set stuff off, because sand won’t burn I suppose. (Thermonuclear weapons the exception)So we get people coming to the beach year round setting off fireworks on random nights. Sometimes I sleep through it and only find out by all the Facebook posts on neighborhood pages from women complaining for the 6th time about their little dogs being freaked out, only to be told once again that it’s not illegal and either get used to it or move. And of course all the fireworks trash people have no issue driving away from being left on the beach.

[Guest]

It shouldn't require a fucking law/ ordinance to behave respectfully/ responsibly.

It isn't that damned hard.

[Cheeseweasel 26437]

3 minutes ago, slorch said:

It shouldn't require a fucking law/ ordinance to behave respectfully/ responsibly.

It isn't that damned hard.

The dismal tide.

[Brothahorn 10081]

No ordinance against it here as we’re in an unincorporated part of the county. Even during burn bans it’s ok to set stuff off, because sand won’t burn I suppose. (Thermonuclear weapons the exception)So we get people coming to the beach year round setting off fireworks on random nights. Sometimes I sleep through it and only find out by all the Facebook posts on neighborhood pages from women complaining for the 6th time about their little dogs being freaked out, only to be told once again that it’s not illegal and either get used to it or move. And of course all the fireworks trash people have no issue driving away from being left on the beach.

I can live with the fireworks but clean up your damn mess!

We have a neighbor on our street who every year does the same shit. Just leaves the trash in the road.

[Cheeseweasel 26437]

Pile it in his fucking yard.

[nnm 35873]

1 hour ago, GoPokes83 said:

Even during burn bans it’s ok to set stuff off, because sand won’t burn I suppose. (Thermonuclear weapons the exception)

Nukes are fake (latest conspiracy theory, dontchaknow). 

[GoPokes83 2236]

I can live with the fireworks but clean up your damn mess!

We have a neighbor on our street who every year does the same shit. Just leaves the trash in the road.

Other than around the 4th and New Years fireworks trash is the occasional nuisance . Balled up shitty diapers (baby thankfully) left behind are pretty much daily. There are a couple of old ladies that hit the beach close to daybreak in their golf carts and spend a couple of hours every day picking up trash. God bless them!!

[NeverMarryAStripper 21780]

2 hours ago, slorch said:

It shouldn't require a fucking law/ ordinance to behave respectfully/ responsibly.

It isn't that damned hard.

Is this your first day in America?