Trivial Things That Make You Surly

[Brothahorn 10087]

Writing a check in Sam's in 2023/2024..What the fuck are you doing, old ass lady?

[WhatTheBuck 28793]

12 hours ago, 956 Worldwide said:

“her husband and kids only eat chicken and seafood.”

“Okay, tell them to bring some.”

[BearSchlong 8102]

Writing a check in Sam's in 2023/2024..What the fuck are you doing, old ass lady?

Using anything but the scan and pay app on your phone in Sam’s is just a waste. I haven’t been to the checkout line in years.

Christmas Eve day I walked in, grabbed a nice trimmed beef tenderloin, scanned, paid, flashed the QR code to the door monitor, and was back in the truck inside of 5 minutes total.

[Underdog 28750]

So you parked in handicapped did ya?  

[Guest]

On 12/30/2023 at 10:12 AM, Brisketexan said:

Yeah…we had an annoying experience the other night when we had some Jewish friends over. The “we don’t eat pork or shellfish” thing is of course no problem, I’ve always been happy to accommodate that religious requirement - I made chicken and dumplings. They also brought one of their sons who is vegetarian - again, no problem, I had a portion of some roasted veggies with rajas and a good red chile sauce. But their youngest son has now apparently gone SUPERJEW. He won’t eat ANY meat not shechita slaughtered (and nobody shared this with us beforehand). So, the chicken and dumplings I had for him? Nope. And I only had one serving of the veggies. So, we had to scramble and find something else for him to eat. Sorry, that was rude.

Here's some fucking corn flakes.  or don't eat motherfucker.

The dietary trump cards make me fucking tired.

Yeah, be respectful, but if you don't want to eat?  Don't  eat.  This isn't your personal fucking circus trick.

Edited December 31, 2023 by slorch

[Bullneck 19185]

On 12/28/2023 at 3:16 PM, slorch said:

In Jersey visiting  family and I made a beer run to replenish booze that has been consumed.  Stopped by 7-11 to toppoff the vehicle with gas. Park and start to get out.  Dude damned near runs over me.

Holy furk.  I forgot about the helpless motherfuckers in New Jersey who can’t pump gas. 

So fucking dumb.  Then I  have some yokel fiddling with my gas cap and touching bank card for no reason.

and fuck their stupid straw policy also.  Gotta ask the cashier for a straw when you buy a fountain drink.  Again,dumb as fuck.

Counterpoint:

1. Gas station attendants are the best thing ever.  I love not dealing with that when it's 12 degrees or 97 degrees.

2. NJ cares about the environment.  Guess what: no plastic bags, either.

[Guest]

7 minutes ago, Bullneck said:

Counterpoint:

1. Gas station attendants are the best thing ever.  I love not dealing with that when it's 12 degrees or 97 degrees.

2. NJ cares about the environment.  Guess what: no plastic bags, either.

1. No they aren't.  I don't need some rando fucking with my vehicle or my bank card/ charge card.  NJ is 1 of 50 who does this and it's , not about customer convenience.

2. The straws behind the counter have fuck all to do with the environment.  LO-Fucking-L.  They are the exact same plastic straws in plastic wrappers.  People love so much shit that sounds good and doesn't make a bit of difference.

Edited December 31, 2023 by slorch

[MrBig 5423]

On 12/30/2023 at 10:12 AM, Brisketexan said:

Yeah…we had an annoying experience the other night when we had some Jewish friends over. The “we don’t eat pork or shellfish” thing is of course no problem, I’ve always been happy to accommodate that religious requirement - I made chicken and dumplings. They also brought one of their sons who is vegetarian - again, no problem, I had a portion of some roasted veggies with rajas and a good red chile sauce. But their youngest son has now apparently gone SUPERJEW. He won’t eat ANY meat not shechita slaughtered (and nobody shared this with us beforehand). So, the chicken and dumplings I had for him? Nope. And I only had one serving of the veggies. So, we had to scramble and find something else for him to eat. Sorry, that was rude.

Just be happy the kid didn’t take it to this level.

[nnm 36478]

[Jameslaw121 4448]

On 12/28/2023 at 12:09 PM, Vic Mackey said:

On 12/28/2023 at 10:19 AM, Bullneck said:

This.
There's no fucking reason for Afghanistan to be the first option in a pull down.

Yep I've mentioned this a few weeks back. United States needs to always be at the top along with some other countries.

Kinda like on ESPN, when you're looking at football score. There is a drop down (usually defaulted to the top 25) so you can select what conference scores you want see. But it has all the conferences listed. Put the Power 5 at the top!

[Sam Lin 3559]

13 hours ago, nnm said:

Fuck you HP!

[conVINCEd 21469]

22 hours ago, nnm said:

People who print things make me surly. Take a screenshot, save it as a pdf, etc.  I’m shorting HP stock when my dad dies, because their printer cartridge division is going to see a serious dip in sales the following quarter.

[YGIFS 19452]

It is fascinating that somehow, despite the vast, vast majority of Americans printing far less/fewer things out the last several years...that the price of printer cartridges/toner completely flies in the face of supply/demand capitalism.  Same with printer paper.  Both commercial and private use of toner and paper are way, way down.  And yet the prices of ink and bulk paper remain level, or even get higher.  And don't give me the inflation bullshit, this has been going on for years.  A solid decade of paper and ink decline and yet their pricing cartel remains in tact, even getting stronger (despite office supply stores folding one after another).  It's fucking weird is all.  

On the subject of soda fountains/coffee stations.  Covid taught us nothing.  Families will stand four abreast at the soda fountain taking their sweet time pouring their sodas, taking a big sip, and then topping them off, slowly putting on lids, unwrapping straws while the kids touch everything they can see in the dispensary area.  Mom looks at the all the tea sweeteners like it's the first time she's seen colored packets.  Kids decide it's too much ice so they dump some out and start over.  What in the fucking fuck?  Stop touching everything.  You approach sideways/perpendicular.  Quick shot of ice, quick dispensing of beverage.  Go set it down.  Then come back and grab anything else you might need, also sideways, like lemon or straw or whatever.  Plus, if you're dining in...be a fucking adult and just sit out of the cup.  Lids and straws are for sippy cups and commuters.  

Edited January 3 by YGIFS

[closetohumping 17453]

Guys that practice their golf swing at the gym or anywhere that isn’t a golf course

[Biff Tannen 45694]

On 12/26/2023 at 8:36 PM, MrBig said:

People who use the term “how come” instead of saying “why” when they ask a question. The second I hear someone say it, I can’t help but think they went to aggy or OU because it sounds so fucking stupid and unintelligent. 

[Biff Tannen 45694]

On 12/28/2023 at 12:09 PM, Vic Mackey said:

On 12/28/2023 at 10:19 AM, Bullneck said:

This.
There's no fucking reason for Afghanistan to be the first option in a pull down.

Yep I've mentioned this a few weeks back. United States needs to always be at the top along with some other countries.

Shouldn't it be by population?  Most to least?

[52-80 19204]

On 12/26/2023 at 8:36 PM, MrBig said:

People who use the term “how come” instead of saying “why” when they ask a question. The second I hear someone say it, I can’t help but think they went to aggy or OU because it sounds so fucking stupid and unintelligent. 

Wherefore do you think so?

[Biff Tannen 45694]

[Biff Tannen 45694]

Why in the motherfuck do different applications on my phone have different volume settings?  If I turn the volume off when I’m on my browser, why is it not assumed that I want the volume off for the rest of the phone?

For example, I turned it off whilst on surly, but then clicked on a Twitter video in surly and shit goes full blast. 
 

I won’t even mention that private browser mode and regular browser mode have the same issue. 

Should this go in dumb question amnesty?

[52-80 19204]

3 hours ago, Biff Tannen said:

For example, I turned it off whilst on surly, but then clicked on a Twitter video in surly and shit goes full blast. 

I won’t even mention that private browser mode and regular browser mode have the same issue. 

Yes, i always have issues with private browser mode for watching videos….”on surly”

[PvilleStang 2917]

6 hours ago, 52-80 said:

Yes, i always have issues with private browser mode for watching videos….”on surly”

"I'm not watching porn, honey, someone posted that prank video again on Surly..."

[Biff Tannen 45694]

5 minutes ago, PvilleStang said:

"I'm not watching porn, honey, someone posted that prank video again on Surly..."

[tbone_ 14134]

Why in the motherfuck do different applications on my phone have different volume settings?  If I turn the volume off when I’m on my browser, why is it not assumed that I want the volume off for the rest of the phone?
For example, I turned it off whilst on surly, but then clicked on a Twitter video in surly and shit goes full blast. 
 
I won’t even mention that private browser mode and regular browser mode have the same issue. 

Should this go in dumb question amnesty?

Annoying af

[WhatTheBuck 28793]

17 hours ago, Biff Tannen said:

Why in the motherfuck do different applications on my phone have different volume settings?  If I turn the volume off when I’m on my browser, why is it not assumed that I want the volume off for the rest of the phone?

For example, I turned it off whilst on surly, but then clicked on a Twitter video in surly and shit goes full blast. 
 

I won’t even mention that private browser mode and regular browser mode have the same issue. 

Should this go in dumb question amnesty?

My iPhone doesn’t work like that. There’s one volume setting for everything. 

[BearSchlong 8102]

People who print things make me surly. Take a screenshot, save it as a pdf, etc.  I’m shorting HP stock when my dad dies, because their printer cartridge division is going to see a serious dip in sales the following quarter.

lol the market didn’t even flinch when my dad died and quit printing out recipes.

It’s been years since I bought cartridges, I have the HP smart subscription. $6/month in perpetuity and they send me refills when my printer tells them to.

[SHOOTER12 8811]

On 12/30/2023 at 10:22 AM, 956 Worldwide said:

There is a statute of limitations, and it’s best to just say what your deal is when you accept an invite. For sure if it’s really involved. “We’d like to come to dinner. We’ve been cutting way down on red meat, is that OK?” lands much better than “we don’t eat anything but chicken and seafood” on the day of.

Its a pretty safe bet that by day of, your host has put planning and money into the meal and it’s a dick move to say “oh, we don’t eat most stuff.” 

Should have told the little bastard to starve.

[YGIFS 19452]

18 hours ago, Biff Tannen said:

Why in the motherfuck do different applications on my phone have different volume settings?  If I turn the volume off when I’m on my browser, why is it not assumed that I want the volume off for the rest of the phone?

For example, I turned it off whilst on surly, but then clicked on a Twitter video in surly and shit goes full blast. 
 

I won’t even mention that private browser mode and regular browser mode have the same issue. 

Should this go in dumb question amnesty?

Why separate setting, why?

 

[Biff Tannen 45694]

2 hours ago, YGIFS said:

Why separate setting, why?

 

This is of course what I thought of.

[YGIFS 19452]

Well, if you'd listened to me...you'd be polishing that gold medal from Barcelona, biff.  Now you're just some confused, no-medal having clown from the 70's in the AppleStore asking for rudimentary assistance.  Don't get me started on your AM/PM settings.  What is this, amateur hour?  

Fun fact because I'm dumb.  IRL, not even doing the bit from Kramer from the Merv Griffin show, I was in El Paso on business about 20 years ago.  I think I was still on my first cell phone.  Took a client out for dinner and drinks.  And then we had to meet the next morning for paperwork.  I set my clock for 7pm, not 7am.  I overslept by two hours.  Thankfully, he overslept by even more.  While waiting for my flight that evening, I set my laptop and phone to 24hr time, the rest of the world keeps it.  So that even in a drunken stupor, I'd look and say, "Well, waking up at 1900 makes no fucking sense."  Saved me ever since, knock on wood.  But I'd still like to think there's a guy in the basement hotel staring at a big clock hoping I'll fuck up.  

[nnm 36478]

On 1/4/2024 at 7:35 PM, YGIFS said:

Well, if you'd listened to me...you'd be polishing that gold medal from Barcelona, biff.  Now you're just some confused, no-medal having clown from the 70's in the AppleStore asking for rudimentary assistance.  Don't get me started on your AM/PM settings.  What is this, amateur hour?  

Fun fact because I'm dumb.  IRL, not even doing the bit from Kramer from the Merv Griffin show, I was in El Paso on business about 20 years ago.  I think I was still on my first cell phone.  Took a client out for dinner and drinks.  And then we had to meet the next morning for paperwork.  I set my clock for 7pm, not 7am.  I overslept by two hours.  Thankfully, he overslept by even more.  While waiting for my flight that evening, I set my laptop and phone to 24hr time, the rest of the world keeps it.  So that even in a drunken stupor, I'd look and say, "Well, waking up at 1900 makes no fucking sense."  Saved me ever since, knock on wood.  But I'd still like to think there's a guy in the basement hotel staring at a big clock hoping I'll fuck up.  

24 hour time on all devices. This is the way. 

[Knoxtnhorn 6064]

Yesterday I was presenting to a class full of teachers.  As far as the teaching profession goes, it's quite common to leave candy out at the table or desks.  So, I put three bags of candy on the sign-in table.  Just as I'm about to speak, this random woman comes up holding the bag of Almond Joys.  

Me: Is everything ok?

Her:  I'm allergic to almonds.

Me - knowing full well I can't go Surly on this chick: Oh, ok.  I'll just put the bag over here.

I mean, seriously?  If it means that much to you, don't touch the fucking candy.  Or, better yet, don't pick up the fucking bag and bring it to me.  I'm honestly not sure what moving the bag about 5 feet did for this chick.  My son also has a tree nut allergy, so this isn't a rant against folks with allergies. 

[Bevo&Pevo 5209]

^^^ ask her to stand 6' away from you because you're allergic to dumbassness. 

[nnm 36478]

2 hours ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

Yesterday I was presenting to a class full of teachers.

Target rich environment. 

[Knoxtnhorn 6064]

3 hours ago, nnm said:

Target rich environment. 

Correct.  I did 6 trainings.  In addition to what I've already mentioned, I also had to deal with one teacher that swore my picture of a lengua taco wasn't lengua because it wasn't barbacoa.  I responded by stating that I just did a search for "lengua tacos" and did not check my source once the pic was found.  That actually cracked up the rest of the group.  I had another that went to one of the AI sites that I mentioned, but couldn't get it to work.  Granted 30 other teachers were on the exact same site w/o an issue, so it had to be something with her laptop.  I'm not saying this was the issue, but she had a bunch of silly stuff added to her laptop - oversized cursor that was about 3 inches in length, butterflies popping up when you press a button, etc...  It's not that I don't want to help.  It's just... Look around you.  If 30 computers are working and your computer is not working, it's probably something with your computer.  The way she spoke, it was if I sent her to a sketchy Surly link from "I'd pee in her butt".

[Underdog 28750]

They’ll take my lead-laden corelle dishes from cold, lead poisoned hands when I die… 

[Biff Tannen 45694]

8 hours ago, Knoxtnhorn said:

Yesterday I was presenting to a class full of teachers.  As far as the teaching profession goes, it's quite common to leave candy out at the table or desks.  So, I put three bags of candy on the sign-in table.  Just as I'm about to speak, this random woman comes up holding the bag of Almond Joys.  

Me: Is everything ok?

Her:  I'm allergic to almonds.

Me - knowing full well I can't go Surly on this chick: Oh, ok.  I'll just put the bag over here.

I mean, seriously?  If it means that much to you, don't touch the fucking candy.  Or, better yet, don't pick up the fucking bag and bring it to me.  I'm honestly not sure what moving the bag about 5 feet did for this chick.  My son also has a tree nut allergy, so this isn't a rant against folks with allergies. 

I was unaware nut allergies traveled through packaging. 

[tx ind 7013]

 

[Bevo&Pevo 5209]

While getting comfortable in the recliner, my ear bud fell into my coffee cup.  Damn, this might be a sign.

[Underdog 28750]

Sink stoppers… no matter how many times I have it positioned to drain it doesn’t on next use. 

[52-80 19204]

Bright, non-dimmable bathroom lights. 
 

When im a guest at hotel or other peoples houses…taking a piss at 3am is like walking straight into the core of the sun. 

[Superhero 8832]

Shopping for bathroom fixtures - those standalone tub fillers are EXPENSIVE AF. Which sucks because it's the decor we want, but will likely only use a few times per year. A decent Moen or Kohler tub fill will be $1500+

[GoPokes83 2240]

Bright, non-dimmable bathroom lights. 
 
When im a guest at hotel or other peoples houses…taking a piss at 3am is like walking straight into the core of the sun. 

At the hotel just piss in the dark and hope for the best. And always leave a tip for whoever has to clean that bathroom floor.

[PvilleStang 2917]

5 hours ago, GoPokes83 said:

At the hotel just piss in the dark and hope for the best. And always leave a tip for whoever has to clean that bathroom floor.

This is how I imagine most Okies live life...  But at least you go above and beyond and tip.

[Underdog 28750]

Pack a night light, we never leave home without it. 

[Mrs Whiggins 13050]

11 hours ago, Underdog said:

Pack a night light, we never leave home without it. 

This. I put one in all of our bathrooms at home so we can all take care of our business (whether that's sleeping or otherwise) without disturbing others. Plus, there's nothing like jamming my pinky toe on the footboard to wake up the entire household while I fall to the ground with a thud whimpering. Dang, that hurts way more than it should considering one of my babies weighed almost nine pounds.

[Vic Mackey 47090]

The amount of Buccees billboards. And they start like 80 miles away and are seemingly there every mile. With them building the one in Hillsboro, I'll see them the entire way down 35 pretty much to Temple.

[InkaUtexas 26012]

1 hour ago, Vic Mackey said:

The amount of Buccees billboards. And they start like 80 miles away and are seemingly there every mile. With them building the one in Hillsboro, I'll see them the entire way down 35 pretty much to Temple.

well gotta hire Aggy engineers to do something.

[BehoId, The Underminer! 11669]

vermont has no billboards.  i think about how awesome that would be all the time.

[956 Worldwide 34736]

People who use the reflexive when it’s not correct. 
 

At a conference and the woman giving admin information kept doing it:

”If you have any questions just direct them to myself.” 
 

“ME! Direct them to “me.” Learn to diagram a damn sentence. 

[52-80 19204]

34 minutes ago, 956 Worldwide said:

People who use the reflexive when it’s not correct. 
 

At a conference and the woman giving admin information kept doing it:

”If you have any questions just direct them to myself.” 
 

“ME! Direct them to “me.” Learn to diagram a damn sentence. 

Whom would say such a thing?