Trivial Things That Make You Surly

[Ignatius 4,017]

20 hours ago, 52-80 said:

The employees must tire of instructing to first-time renters. 

“okay, what happens if i dont buy the damage waiver?”

“and how much gas do i put into it?”
 

“Well how much does that one cost?’

[Braff Zacklin 13,636]

5 hours ago, Covri said:

Almonds in deluxe mixed nuts. I like almonds and buy the blue diamond wasabi and soy sauce ones regularly , but for some reason I don’t like them mixed with cashews and pecans and whatnot. They taste like wood compared to the rest of the mix.

 

[Incredulity 11,679]

On 7/4/2024 at 1:12 PM, Brisketexan said:

Picking up a rental car at Long Beach airport for the week. Went with budget through Costco cuz it saved over $100 compared to any of my preferred accounts.
The check in process here is taking over 10 minutes…per customer. There are 10 people in front of me. Every other agency is processing people in 2-3 minutes.

National.

Its worth whatever I miss in savings to walk off plane to car and drive away.

[Incredulity 11,679]

The mega assholes who tether their dog 5ft away from them and let the dog whimper and whine for hours on end.  Spent a few hours at the beach yesterday 25 yards from a pack of these dickheads.  

[InkaUtexas 26,022]

3 hours ago, Incredulity said:

The mega assholes who tether their dog 5ft away from them and let the dog whimper and whine for hours on end.  Spent a few hours at the beach yesterday 25 yards from a pack of these dickheads.  

See at the local beer hall all the time. Great to see a dog lying in the sun, no water, while dad tells his HS glory days stories. Place has a few water points and always some dog bowls next to each one.

Get your dog some damn water asshole. Or even better, since it is not a service dog, don't bring them to a bar.

Edited July 6 by InkaUtexas

[nnm 36,482]

Who’s to blame for this? Wife for freaking out or husband for leaving his hitch on?

 

[Scheiss Meister 8,408]

Both.  I haven't walked less than 24 inches past the back of a truck in 40 or more years.  Just assume that the hitch is there, waiting to maul your leg like a shark at South Padre.

[Superhero 8,833]

A few from last night…

Went to a Blink182 concert at SoFi stadium last night. I don’t know their music, and frankly didn’t want to go, but wife’s friend gave her tickets in a suite, so I went as her driver. I don’t like Blink182. 

We agreed leave early to avoid traffic. We also agreed to drive her friend’s friend home. She remembers as we were walking to the car that her bag was checked in on the other side of the stadium. So my wife went with her. I thought it would be a great idea to loop around and get them (unforced error here).

After the event, they closed streets and left turn lanes, so I ended up in traffic for the next hour to get to where I was going to pick them up. A while hour.

We didn’t get home until 1:15. Im exhausted.

 

Edited July 7 by Superhero

[InkaUtexas 26,022]

All you had to say was Wife and Blink 182.

[Underdog 28,755]

Without fail whenever I take a shit at junior's house I clog up the toilet, they have 2 1/2 baths and only 1 plunger... located in their master bath.  So I have to be discreet and go grab it to unclog the shitter.  Next visit I'm doing the colonoscopy prep and be completely emptied out. 

[Prepuce of Doom 21,098]

4 minutes ago, Underdog said:

Without fail whenever I take a shit at junior's house I clog up the toilet, they have 2 1/2 baths and only 1 plunger... located in their master bath.  So I have to be discreet and go grab it to unclog the shitter.  Next visit I'm doing the colonoscopy prep and be completely emptied out. 

My grandparents retired to a home in the mountains and were on a well and septic system. In my youth, I once had three of their four toilets out of commission at the same time. Eventually had to start keeping a supply of spare wire coat hangers in my preferred shittorium. 

[YGIFS 19,452]

Yeah, this makes me surly.  It doesn't have to be binary.  You don't have to have just the one plunger that people just trek through the house over and over again because you worship the patron Saint of Carbs.  Likewise, you don't have your bathroom area defaced with a toilet brush and plunger just sitting out in the open on the floor by the sink.  If people are coming over.  You hose it off, let it dry, put it in a plastic bag and stick it under the sink so it's there if people need it discretely.  And you do it for each bathroom so nobody goes Band Leader Baton style, marching with it like the fucking Whiz from Seinfeld.  

We don't stay with family much, but when we do---the plunger situation is like this bizarre little inside secret that nobody talks about.  Like you have to give the last 4 digits of your SSN and mother's maiden name to lease one for 3 minutes.  You got redundant stuff all over the house, just spring for one more plunger and hide it under the sink so I don't have to smell it while I'm brushing my teeth.  I get that I have to ask for the alarm code to go outside or which light switch operates what.  But you don't make a fucking Escape Room game out of a bowel movement.  

[Braff Zacklin 13,636]

53 minutes ago, Underdog said:

Without fail whenever I take a shit at junior's house I clog up the toilet, they have 2 1/2 baths and only 1 plunger... located in their master bath.  So I have to be discreet and go grab it to unclog the shitter.  Next visit I'm doing the colonoscopy prep and be completely emptied out. 

At this point, Dog, it's obviously intentional. You left evidence of premeditation in the Steel Shank thread:

 

22 hours ago, Underdog said:

Can’t head back home without getting some authentic Q… 

 

[Underdog 28,755]

Dickeys was at the airport, y’all might to want to avoid stall #4 in the men’s room by C Gates for a bit, pretty sure a Hazmat Unit was dispatched to that bathroom shortly after I used it. 

[YGIFS 19,452]

I once had a BM so violent whilst waiting for a connecting flight at Denver that everybody left the restroom and I washed my hands and walked out.  And there was a EMT cart and they asked if I needed medical attention.   I was just so glad it didnt happen up In the air.  
 

three Starbucks before leaving beaver creek.  Some kinda expired omelette at the little airport there and then pounded about 5 carbonated cocktails at the DEN terminal.  The volume wasn’t plunge-worthy but in hindsight the smell was worse than the jet fuel on the jetway.  
 

Always makes me think of thst Seinfeld bit about how to awkwardly tell people how much to jiggle the handle so it doesn’t clog.  Always ends up with you showing them where you keep the plunger.  
 

We could invent a flushable plunger for discretion outta the wreath fund.  

[nnm 36,482]

7 hours ago, YGIFS said:

I was just so glad it didnt happen up In the air.  

Gotcha covered there. 

 

[Sam Lin 3,560]

You just need a poop knife.

[Incredulity 11,679]

11 hours ago, Sam Lin said:

You just need a poop knife.

[nnm 36,482]

23 hours ago, YGIFS said:

Yeah, this makes me surly.  It doesn't have to be binary.  You don't have to have just the one plunger that people just trek through the house over and over again because you worship the patron Saint of Carbs.  Likewise, you don't have your bathroom area defaced with a toilet brush and plunger just sitting out in the open on the floor by the sink.  If people are coming over.  You hose it off, let it dry, put it in a plastic bag and stick it under the sink so it's there if people need it discretely.  And you do it for each bathroom so nobody goes Band Leader Baton style, marching with it like the fucking Whiz from Seinfeld.  

We don't stay with family much, but when we do---the plunger situation is like this bizarre little inside secret that nobody talks about.  Like you have to give the last 4 digits of your SSN and mother's maiden name to lease one for 3 minutes.  You got redundant stuff all over the house, just spring for one more plunger and hide it under the sink so I don't have to smell it while I'm brushing my teeth.  I get that I have to ask for the alarm code to go outside or which light switch operates what.  But you don't make a fucking Escape Room game out of a bowel movement.  

This is not complicated or expensive. One of the sets below should be in every toilet room. Every toilet should have both a plunger and a brush beside it. No one needs to be carrying a plunger or a brush around the house in a moment of crisis when the toilet is either clogged or splattered. 
https://www.amazon.com/SetSail-Plunger-Plungers-Bathroom-Cleaning/dp/B0BDRQV3P8/ref=mp_s_a_1_3?crid=W0MUTSUROUMU&dib=eyJ2IjoiMSJ9.QrTyTRt1Qwx9uGMzT3h3gTgMZ9AjQK8O9nkLE1W_FpNAbI8XbndQtnohvVLjK4k_yKQw6_FE7gLWScCfB6pW2zkaRk2C8cxvXOjLutn6M_dimJE34W-h_w2tg1Y-Him-Z7du_ZPus-gLuGMvdFGMMRCoaSsv9yUtEKSmoLg2OYOapEwLdY6rWEDJxV86lRZJDZGoo5AdBY55Ee4uiADnlw.44SS0UatJorxiP7OjWT5A0UGVTxC0YrZWMBmf6FknCA&dib_tag=se&keywords=toilet%2Bplunger%2Band%2Bbrush%2Bset&qid=1720457983&sprefix=toilet%2Bplunger%2B%2Caps%2C104&sr=8-3&th=1&psc=1

[closetohumping 17,455]

430 meetings to ensure we are still in office

[Knoxtnhorn 6,065]

On 7/5/2024 at 7:14 PM, nnm said:

This pissed me off so much a few months ago on 40 that I promised I was going to beat my younger brother's ass for being a truck driver.  I was told that there was some sort of mechanical reason that semis are unable to gun the engine to pick up speed.  (A max speed is built in or something.)  Fine.  Then, when you're driving a semi in the right lane and a truck is on your left trying to pass, then slow the fuck down for an 8th of a mile and let the guy pass.  

[closetohumping 17,455]

On 7/5/2024 at 5:14 PM, nnm said:

Even worse is a regular car in the left lane unwilling to pass the 18 wheeler

[Superhero 8,833]

1 hour ago, closetohumping said:

430 meetings to ensure we are still in office

Still better than meetings scheduled between 12 - 1PM.

If it's an in-person meeting, you better buy me lunch.

 

 

[tbone_ 14,134]

This pissed me off so much a few months ago on 40 that I promised I was going to beat my younger brother's ass for being a truck driver.  I was told that there was some sort of mechanical reason that semis are unable to gun the engine to pick up speed.  (A max speed is built in or something.)  Fine.  Then, when you're driving a semi in the right lane and a truck is on your left trying to pass, then slow the fuck down for an 8th of a mile and let the guy pass.  

40 is always a beating. It’s like NASCAR but with 18 wheelers. Across the entire country. Buckle up for that trip.

[Superhero 8,833]

My belt lines up with one of my shirt buttons, which guarantees the fabric above the aforementioned button and the button above will tent out when sitting down or even if I’m not standing completely straight.

I wear an undershirt just so people won’t see my belly button. 

[Underdog 28,755]

Thank you. 

[Biff Tannen 45,695]

6 hours ago, closetohumping said:

430 meetings to ensure we are still in office

Fuuuuuuuuck that.

[mininghorn88 2,295]

Toilets that have the flush mechanism in the top center of the tank. How am I supposed to twist around and give a courtesy flush without putting a lot of torque on the toilet seat ring and risk popping the hinges? I am getting old and I am not as flexible as I used to be. Ugh.

[Orale 1,087]

Whole families or groups waiting together with their luggage to pick up a single food order at a crowded airport. You only need one person there goddammit! 

[Superhero 8,833]

1 hour ago, mininghorn88 said:

Toilets that have the flush mechanism in the top center of the tank. How am I supposed to twist around and give a courtesy flush without putting a lot of torque on the toilet seat ring and risk popping the hinges? I am getting old and I am not as flexible as I used to be. Ugh.

 

That, and where am I going to put my box of wet wipes?

[Braff Zacklin 13,636]

4 hours ago, mininghorn88 said:

Toilets that have the flush mechanism in the top center of the tank. How am I supposed to twist around and give a courtesy flush without putting a lot of torque on the toilet seat ring and risk popping the hinges? I am getting old and I am not as flexible as I used to be. Ugh.

This style of actuation was clearly invented by and for those who want to rise up and stare at their turds before seeing them swim away.

[Biff Tannen 45,695]

6 hours ago, Braff Zacklin said:

This style of actuation was clearly invented by and for those who want to rise up and stare at their turds before seeing them swim away.

Gotta make sure I’m healthy ya know?

[closetohumping 17,455]

Soccer mom in a ford expedition carrying to cross three lanes of traffic at the airport.  Of course I’m in the last lane and honk to avoid getting hit.  No wave, no my bad just “I need to be in that lane!”   Then you should’ve been in that lane lady

[Antidean 200]

Wasp spray used to kill those bastards instantly. Now you spray them and they laugh at me and fly away.

[Al_4_ISU 12,473]

8 hours ago, Braff Zacklin said:

This style of actuation was clearly invented by and for those who want to rise up and stare at their turds before seeing them swim away.

There are people who don't inspect prior to flushing?

[Scheiss Meister 8,408]

I have somehow become allergic to the adhesive on HEB brand band aids.  I have two places on my left arm that are swollen and itch like hell where I put band aids over minor wounds that wouldn't stop bleeding.  I haven't had band aids on those areas for four days and they still itch.  I have to use Curad or Band-Aid brand now and pay twice as much.  Dammit.

[nnm 36,482]

1 hour ago, closetohumping said:

Soccer mom in a ford expedition carrying to cross three lanes of traffic at the airport.  Of course I’m in the last lane and honk to avoid getting hit.  No wave, no my bad just “I need to be in that lane!”   Then you should’ve been in that lane lady

Airport drivers are really bad.  People are constantly missing the entrance or exit to their terminal or parking area.  I am always on highest alert and extremely defensive when I'm nearing an airport.

[YGIFS 19,452]

13 minutes ago, Scheiss Meister said:

I have somehow become allergic to the adhesive on HEB brand band aids.  I have two places on my left arm that are swollen and itch like hell where I put band aids over minor wounds that wouldn't stop bleeding.  I haven't had band aids on those areas for four days and they still itch.  I have to use Curad or Band-Aid brand now and pay twice as much.  Dammit.

That happened to me recently.  We have about four different brands in the house with the kids and me.  And you can make out precisely where in my legs the irritant bandages were.  Middle aged skin issues were for women; I thought.  

[closetohumping 17,455]

14 minutes ago, nnm said:

Airport drivers are really bad.  People are constantly missing the entrance or exit to their terminal or parking area.  I am always on highest alert and extremely defensive when I'm nearing an airport.

I didn’t let the lady in.    It wa somewhat sudden and scary.  Also some people just wait on the side of the road instead of the cell phone lot

[NAVY 6,747]

19 minutes ago, Scheiss Meister said:

I have somehow become allergic to the adhesive on HEB brand band aids.  I have two places on my left arm that are swollen and itch like hell where I put band aids over minor wounds that wouldn't stop bleeding.  I haven't had band aids on those areas for four days and they still itch.  I have to use Curad or Band-Aid brand now and pay twice as much.  Dammit.

Proof that Big Band-Aid’s plan is working nicely. 
 

Hope you heal quick 

[Underdog 28,755]

9 hours ago, Braff Zacklin said:

This style of actuation was clearly invented by and for those who want to rise up and stare at their turds before seeing them swim away.

<—- raises hand. 

[Native Horn 3,505]

1 hour ago, nnm said:

Airport drivers are really bad.  People are constantly missing the entrance or exit to their terminal or parking area.  I am always on highest alert and extremely defensive when I'm nearing an airport.

The signage at AUS is abysmal.  And constantly changing.  Fast Park & Relax ftw.

[Superhero 8,833]

3 hours ago, Antidean said:

Wasp spray used to kill those bastards instantly. Now you spray them and they laugh at me and fly away.

I had a pest control guy come remove 12 nests. Not sure what he used, but it was pretty damn effective. He also climbed to reach most of the roof eaves which is something I wouldn't do. So best $250 I've spent lately.

[nnm 36,482]

14 minutes ago, Superhero said:

I had a pest control guy come remove 12 nests. Not sure what he used, but it was pretty damn effective. He also climbed to reach most of the roof eaves which is something I wouldn't do. So best $250 I've spent lately.

I'm shocked you can get anyone to do more than have a cup of coffee for less than $1,000 in Seattle (or are you in the SF Bay Area?  I don't remember--but same point).

Edited July 9 by nnm

[Al Czervik 1,229]

HEB employees watching people clearly not pay in the self checkout and let them walk out the door. 

[davidg 4,038]

I have somehow become allergic to the adhesive on HEB brand band aids.  I have two places on my left arm that are swollen and itch like hell where I put band aids over minor wounds that wouldn't stop bleeding.  I haven't had band aids on those areas for four days and they still itch.  I have to use Curad or Band-Aid brand now and pay twice as much.  Dammit.

Blue shop towels and duct tape for the win. Will fix up anything short of a partial amputation.

[Prepuce of Doom 21,098]

6 hours ago, nnm said:

I'm shocked you can get anyone to do more than have a cup of coffee for less than $1,000 in Seattle (or are you in the SF Bay Area?  I don't remember--but same point).

Ha! @Superhero got mistaken for one of those Seattle Team assholes! 

[Superhero 8,833]

1 hour ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

Ha! @Superhero got mistaken for one of those Seattle Team assholes! 

How dare you?

How DARE YOU?

[shakahorn 1,645]

8 hours ago, nnm said:

I'm shocked you can get anyone to do more than have a cup of coffee for less than $1,000 in Seattle (or are you in the SF Bay Area?  I don't remember--but same point).

He must be fluent in Spanish /noracist

[Vic Mackey 47,095]

Airport drivers are really bad.  People are constantly missing the entrance or exit to their terminal or parking area.  I am always on highest alert and extremely defensive when I'm nearing an airport.

I drive like this constantly. I assume every driver is about to make some dumb ass decision at any given time.