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Trivial Things That Make You Surly

elfenix

By elfenix
in Lulz

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NeverMarryAStripper
NeverMarryAStripper

If cassettes are coming back, then people will have to start carrying pencils again

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Armybrat
Armybrat

“No Trucks In Left Lane” - Waxahachie 2023:  

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Sandman

Sandman 3401

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On 7/17/2019 at 1:57 PM, El Diablo said:

Indian Chief has got to be just brutal. Pow-wows, squaws, setting up and tearing down teepees. Not to mention the white men and their ways. Sheesh.

The easy access to fire-water really soothes those jangled nerves.

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WhatTheBuck

WhatTheBuck 28700

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Posted
4 hours ago, Scheiss Meister said:

People who litter are horrible human beings.  I hope that all of their personal electronics break, their gas mileage sucks, their tires wear unevenly, and they or their significant other get permanent erectile dysfunction.  

This goes for everyone who leaves their trash at their seats after concerts and sporting events.

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HornsOverIthaca

HornsOverIthaca 2333

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On 7/15/2019 at 8:38 PM, Onboard 2.0 said:

Heh heh. When we got our first Tahoe, it had Onstar. The kids accidentally locked the doors with the keys inside at the wifes grandmothers house (in her late 80's at the time).

We called Onstar to get them to unlock it. We explained they were sending a signal to a satellite to open the doors remotely.   She was freaking out that we were calling a satellite to come over her house, and that it might crash thru her roof.

That reminds me of that Dave Matthews song.  I think it went “Satellite, fell thru the skylight, whooahooo.”

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El Diablo

El Diablo 4232

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10 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said:

This goes for everyone who leaves their trash at their seats after concerts and sporting events.

I think logistically it's just easier on event staff to use firehoses and wash it all into one spot and then use a front end loader to dispose of it. Plus they're washing down the steps and seats as they go. The sheer volume of the trash at such an event would overwhelm small trash cans leading to a larger mess that would still need to be transported most likely by hand  to a final collection point.

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Onboard 2.0

Onboard 2.0 9083

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3 minutes ago, BurntEyes said:

Conversely, they don't know shit about it.

Non-Nerds covering nerd shit is like Surly members covering a Miss America pagent.

Sure, we will bicker and discuss, but the content isn't very valuable.

"Look at those RATs my friend."

"Indeed Bob, those are some outstanding bolt ons, but have you seen her knees. Bob, her knees, they are horrifying."

"Maybe Chad, maybe, but that ass!"

"Christ, she is fucking fat!"

Sounds like a pretty solid analysis right there.  I think you need to rethink the whole Surly Miss America thing.

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'stache

'stache 21743

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26 minutes ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

Sounds like a pretty solid analysis right there.  I think you need to rethink the whole Surly Miss America thing.

How about a Miss Surly pageant? Jade v. Fitlump v. That preacher guy who pretended to be a slutty girl. 

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'stache

'stache 21743

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51 minutes ago, BurntEyes said:

Jesus fucking Christ, would I be required to participate?

Because you just listed the entire string of Surly women that would participate.

Jade is attractive, but I can't stand the thought of Fit lumps speech alone.

Why don't we just crown Jade and call it a day.

What if Jades talent is chili making? That would be a big deduction.

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CoTex

CoTex 1158

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When you go through the drive through kfc in Marshall, Texas and get some chicken that may be the best kfc in America.  I mean it was perfect.  Then, when you’re thinking “I’m going to post on surly about how great the Marshall kfc is, this news must be shared,” you realize that they shortdicked you out of your biscuit, and you’re halfway to Carthage.  

You gonna drive back to Marshall for a biscuit?  Nope, just soak in your misery, sans biscuit.

Dammit.

 

 

 

 

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ztejas

ztejas 43237

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16 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said:

This goes for everyone who leaves their trash at their seats after concerts and sporting events.

There's a difference between just throwing trash out the window on some random stretch of road and leaving trash in an area that is designated for cleanup by people getting paid to clean it up.

Leaving your trash at your concert seat or movie theater seat or wherever just makes you a normal dick. Going out of your way to litter makes you a fucking asshole. 

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'stache

'stache 21743

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1 hour ago, BurntEyes said:

You say this, but clearly didn't know mini-baller, Trumpet, nor Rhinowoman.

Trust me, we are way better off without them.

And I haven't even been laid in a while so my thirst is real.

Was she the racist Asian? If so I was around for a bit of her nastiness.

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EE2B

EE2B 1561

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When you go through the drive through kfc in Marshall, Texas and get some chicken that may be the best kfc in America.  I mean it was perfect.  Then, when you’re thinking “I’m going to post on surly about how great the Marshall kfc is, this news must be shared,” you realize that they shortdicked you out of your biscuit, and you’re halfway to Carthage.  
You gonna drive back to Marshall for a biscuit?  Nope, just soak in your misery, sans biscuit.
Dammit.
 
 
 
 

Serves you right for passing by Riverport BBQ in Jefferson and not getting a rack of ribs to go.
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GottaB

GottaB 589

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People who don't take in their trash/recycle containers at the end of pick up day.   There are ~ 15% of my neighbors who let them stay out for an extra day or so.  JFC, how lazy can you get?

Well
I work till 11 pm. You want me causing a ruckus putting it away at midnight or mind your own fucking business and I’ll put it away in the next day or so.
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DougO

DougO 5239

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A couple hundred years of development of petrolium based combustion engines and they still haven't come up with a better version of the dipstick for checking actual physical fluid levels. I hate dipsticks, especially for clearish stuff like tranny fluid. I still can't read that shit.

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chikin23

chikin23 384

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Posted
When you go through the drive through kfc in Marshall, Texas and get some chicken that may be the best kfc in America.  I mean it was perfect.  Then, when you’re thinking “I’m going to post on surly about how great the Marshall kfc is, this news must be shared,” you realize that they shortdicked you out of your biscuit, and you’re halfway to Carthage.  
You gonna drive back to Marshall for a biscuit?  Nope, just soak in your misery, sans biscuit.
Dammit.
 
 
 
 
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Armybrat

Armybrat 40677

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7 hours ago, DougO said:

A couple hundred years of development of petrolium based combustion engines and they still haven't come up with a better version of the dipstick for checking actual physical fluid levels. I hate dipsticks, especially for clearish stuff like tranny fluid. I still can't read that shit.

Talk about a floater right over the plate.....

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elfenix

elfenix 34165

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7 hours ago, 52-80 said:

How does every Taco Bell in the world manage to fuck up your order like 70% of the time?  Is it in their corporate training to leave shit out of your bag?

no idea how they confused a doritos taco for a chicken roll with mayo sauce last night, but they did.  that roll was fucking disgusting.

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Brothahorn

Brothahorn 10085

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Posted
Also, if a website doesn't let you print a page, can't you just use the snipping tool, and save the image? Granted it's a picture of what you want, but it should work.


Snipping tool? What is that?

Oh, you mean the scissors?

Yes, mom.

Well I that was for cutting stuff.
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