Trivial Things That Make You Surly

[Cheeseweasel 26,438]

54 minutes ago, elfenix said:

people who get mad at me when i merge at the merge point. 

This. Fuck them for not understanding the rules of traffic. 

[Walden Ponderer 12,639]

There is a trade-off to be considered. Zipper-merge is undoubtedly faster -- the science is pretty clear on that point. But it is also rude, and generates a lot of ill-will for a relatively minor gain in efficiency.

I tend to prefer erring on the side of manners in any situation that involves this kind of trade-off. Uncivil behavior can be entertaining on the internet, but the real-life consequences are a bit much. You have no idea what is going on in other people's lives, and to me it just makes good sense to leave them be as much as possible -- up to and including making me wait an additional minute or two for the line to finally leave the access road and join the freeway.

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

3 minutes ago, Walden Ponderer said:

There is a trade-off to be considered. Zipper-merge is undoubtedly faster -- the science is pretty clear on that point. But it is also rude, and generates a lot of ill-will for a relatively minor gain in efficiency.

I tend to prefer erring on the side of manners in any situation that involves this kind of trade-off. Uncivil behavior can be entertaining on the internet, but the real-life consequences are a bit much. You have no idea what is going on in other people's lives, and to me it just makes good sense to leave them be as much as possible -- up to and including making me wait an additional minute or two for the line to finally leave the access road and join the freeway.

Say what ?  It's rude ?  If people zipper merge congestion decreases, and traffic flow increases. The rude behavior are people thinking by not letting you in they're going to get where they're going at least an hour quicker.

[General Specific 3,268]

Say what ?  It's rude ?  If people zipper merge congestion decreases, and traffic flow increases. The rude behavior are people thinking by not letting you in they're going to get where they're going at least an hour quicker.

It’s like some on here have not lived in Houston.

 

Zipper when merging traffic due to construction. Sure, we get it...play nice.

 

However, it’s another thing all together when hitting an exit ramp with traffic. Nice people finish last! There is always a Prius, or a blue hair, or a texter not paying attention....yup, open space!!!1!

 

If internet traffic zippered, we would get nowhere fast!

[WhatTheBuck 28,798]

6 hours ago, Walden Ponderer said:

There is a trade-off to be considered. Zipper-merge is undoubtedly faster -- the science is pretty clear on that point. But it is also rude

Holy shit. 

[nnm 36,636]

11 hours ago, General Specific said:

It’s like some on here have not lived in Houston.

 

Zipper when merging traffic due to construction. Sure, we get it...play nice.

 

However, it’s another thing all together when hitting an exit ramp with traffic. Nice people finish last! There is always a Prius, or a blue hair, or a texter not paying attention....yup, open space!!!1!

 

If internet traffic zippered, we would get nowhere fast!

Or the entrance ramps on the Katy Freeway. You can calmly wait in the entrance line for 10 minutes, inching forward. Which I usually do.
Or, if you’re in a hurry, you can stay a lane outside, and spot that opening right before the ramp, which I understand that a friend does occasionally. There’s always that blue hair or Prius or texter that will create that opening right before the ramp. 

[NeverMarryAStripper 21,921]

12 hours ago, General Specific said:

If internet traffic zippered, we would get nowhere fast!

There's a lot a poster here that should just zip it

[Biff Tannen 45,741]

Merging is all about spotting your opportunity and taking it.

[elfenix 34,332]

17 hours ago, Walden Ponderer said:

But it is also rude, and generates a lot of ill-will for a relatively minor gain in efficiency.

it's only rude if don't know that you should zipper.

 

13 hours ago, General Specific said:

However, it’s another thing all together when hitting an exit ramp with traffic. Nice people finish last! There is always a Prius, or a blue hair, or a texter not paying attention....yup, open space!!!1!

that's not a zipper merge situation.  zipper is when a lane is disappearing into another.  an exit ramp isn't that. 

[HouTex 1,894]

that's not a zipper merge situation.  zipper is when a lane is disappearing into another.  an exit ramp isn't that. 

This. I’m pro zipper. Today coming into downtown Hou on I-10 traffic was slow but moving and some idiot in the far right lane thinks the entrance ramp on her right is actually a new lane that will be wide open and free of traffic. She gets into the entrance ramp and sees almost immediately that she has to merge right back into her previous lane. She just cut the line by 3 or 4 cars. I suppose it’s worth it for those kinds of people.

[General Specific 3,268]

Merging is all about spotting your opportunity and taking it.

Username checks

[NeverMarryAStripper 21,921]

I like it when rude chicks wear zipper tops

[Walden Ponderer 12,639]

14 minutes ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

I like it when rude chicks wear zipper tops

Well, if you can't get behind this, you should get out front of it.

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

1 hour ago, Walden Ponderer said:

Well, if you can't get behind this, you should get out front of it.

It really helps to be in front of the chick in the zipper top to appreciate the zipper top... doesn't it ?

[52-80 19,246]

I'm gonna say....Wes Anderson.  Just everything about him/it

[Brothahorn 10,087]

Sunday is the absolute worst day to go to HEB.
Saturday morning is the best.
And I never use self checkout. Too many idiots trying to use it.

Have to go early on Sunday..6am-8am

[elfenix 34,332]

glue residue on my windshield from old registration stickers

[Okie State 3,847]

The registration stickers aren't bad compared to the old inspection stickers that would disintegrate when you tried to remove them. A little rubbing alcohol removes the glue.

 

[nnm 36,636]

21 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

I like it when rude chicks wear zipper tops

Is this the one to which you are referring?

[Guest Lobo]

Hotels that feel the need to have 25 brands under their Flag.  It's annoying not knowing what you're getting from city to city, brand to brand.  Before I get all excited for your upper-upscale lifestyle concept eco-friendly location-centric hotel...just make sure you're living up to just regular Hyatt standards.  Focus on the fundamentals before you get too cute with your mission statement at check-in.  

[HenryJames 66,171]

“Real-a-tor.”

[RPM 26,354]

That one little spec of bug guts on your wiper blade that leaves a streak but no matter how hard you try to remove it still leaves a streak.

[dingleberryswitzer 2,724]

I have a few things "saved for later" in my Amazon cart.  Whenever I view my car I get an "important message" that tells me of price changes on these items.  99% of the time the price has changed all of 4 cents. 

[WhatTheBuck 28,798]

41 minutes ago, dingleberryswitzer said:

I have a few things "saved for later" in my Amazon cart.  Whenever I view my car I get an "important message" that tells me of price changes on these items.  99% of the time the price has changed all of 4 cents. 

Are you familiar with the phrase, "Shit or get off the pot?"

[dingleberryswitzer 2,724]

I am.  I am actually on the pot taking a shit as I type this.  

[Prepuce of Doom 21,103]

16 hours ago, Lobo said:

Hotels that feel the need to have 25 brands under their Flag.  It's annoying not knowing what you're getting from city to city, brand to brand.  Before I get all excited for your upper-upscale lifestyle concept eco-friendly location-centric hotel...just make sure you're living up to just regular Hyatt standards.  Focus on the fundamentals before you get too cute with your mission statement at check-in.  

And the clerk is often incredulous when you ask which umbrella they're under so that you can give them the correct rewards account number. 

But at least it often allows you an opportunity to openly mock the whole dumb "Bonvoy" thing. 

[Trey3216 15,356]

2 minutes ago, dingleberryswitzer said:

I am.  I am actually on the pot taking a shit as I type this.  

Username checks out

[MNLonghornFUKM 8,821]

I have a few things "saved for later" in my Amazon cart.  Whenever I view my car I get an "important message" that tells me of price changes on these items.  99% of the time the price has changed all of 4 cents. 

Or in my wife’s Amazon cart: $6,498.58

[MaybeACoordinator 8,349]

"OMG (Lizzo / Rachel Maddow / some obese domesticated raccoon on the Internet that eats only Oreos / whatever) is MY SPIRIT ANIMAL!!!!!!!!"

Look bitch, if you want a spirit animal you've got to wander isolated desert canyons for 30 days and nights wearing nothing but a loincloth and subsisting only on rainwater, peyote buttons, and scorpions, or go into a dense jungle with nothing but a flint-bladed knife and come out dragging a dead full-grown jaguar. Or leopard. 

You don't get to sit there on your couch and claim some lame-ass celebrity is your spirit animal. It makes me mad just typing it.

You've got to earn that shit. 

[Brisketexan 105,336]

"OMG (Lizzo / Rachel Maddow / some obese domesticated raccoon on the Internet that eats only Oreos / whatever) is MY SPIRIT ANIMAL!!!!!!!!"
Look bitch, if you want a spirit animal you've got to wander isolated desert canyons for 30 days and nights wearing nothing but a loincloth and subsisting only on rainwater, peyote buttons, and scorpions, or go into a dense jungle with nothing but a flint-bladed knife and come out dragging a dead full-grown jaguar. Or leopard. 
You don't get to sit there on your couch and claim some lame-ass celebrity is your spirit animal. It makes me mad just typing it.
You've got to earn that shit. 

Assholes bitching about random and pointless shit on the internet is my spirit animal.

[SilasCoade 2,622]

Chad Briscoe is MaybeACoordinator's spirit animal.

[elfenix 34,332]

surveys that ask me to ascribe human attributes to corporations.   ask me how my food was, how quickly my order was taken, if the blowjob in the restroom was to completion, fine, whatever.  ask me if the ginormous corporation cares about me as a customer?  fuck no. the corporation is just some bits on a computer in delaware or nevada.  it's not friendly, or caring, or fun, or youthful, or whatever bullshit some marketing asshole who paid way too much for his bullshit degree and charges way too much by the hour came up with in some flash of doublethink moronity in a business park in topeka. 

Edited February 19, 2020 by elfenix

[RPM 26,354]

Self checkout. Fuck cost cutting, money grubbing corporate moves that A) don't lower prices, B) cost real people real jobs, C) got some corporate asshole a nice bonus.

[Iceman 2,725]

people thinking self checkout costs jobs..., as if there'd be 35 swinging dicks/ cunts running the registers if not for them there computers.

Edited February 19, 2020 by Iceman

['stache 21,866]

8 hours ago, Brisketexan said:

Assholes bitching about random and pointless shit on the internet is my spirit animal.

This thread is my spirit animal.

[WhatTheBuck 28,798]

6 hours ago, RPM said:

Self checkout. Fuck cost cutting, money grubbing corporate moves that A) don't lower prices, B) cost real people real jobs, C) got some corporate asshole a nice bonus.

You shop at Walmart. Don't tell us you care about the plight of the American worker or corporate greed. 

[Cheeseweasel 26,438]

54 minutes ago, WhatTheBuck said:

You shop at Walmart. Don't tell us you care about the plight of the American worker or corporate greed. 

I'm putting a Chinese kid thru college. 

[Biff Tannen 45,741]

I for one am glad that self check out exists because it means my grocery store finally got all of my letters that said I WANT TO BE A CHECK OUT CLERK!

[Judge Roybeanbag 11,821]

11 hours ago, Brisketexan said:

Assholes bitching about random and pointless shit on the internet is my spirit animal.

So basically this spirit animal?

[Brisketexan 105,336]

9 minutes ago, Judge Roybeanbag said:

So basically this spirit animal?

You've met me....so....yeah.

[elfenix 34,332]

2 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said:

You shop at Walmart. Don't tell us you care about the plight of the American worker or corporate greed. 

i used to go to walmart after 8 pm soccer games on sundays because it was the only place open.  after 10 pm they'd have one or two register open, despite the fact they'd get slammed with people filling their carts for the week b/c they all just got off work.  half the time i'd end up walking out with nothing b/c i didn't want to wait in line for 30 minutes.  self checkout improved that situation immensely.

[Walden Ponderer 12,639]

Not only do I love self checkout, I love the places that let you order on an app, and pick up at a self-checkout where you scan a code. And I wouldn't even object if a robot had put everything in the bag for me. I for one welcome our robot overlords.

[WhatTheBuck 28,798]

I found a hundred dollar bill on the floor in the self checkout lane one time. Don't tell me it doesn't pay. 

[RPM 26,354]

3 hours ago, WhatTheBuck said:

You shop at Walmart. Don't tell us you care about the plight of the American worker or corporate greed. 

HEB isn't open around here.

[RPM 26,354]

18 hours ago, Iceman said:

people thinking self checkout costs jobs..., as if there'd be 35 swinging dicks/ cunts running the registers if not for them there computers.

[Tom 2,959]

19 hours ago, elfenix said:

i used to go to walmart after 8 pm soccer games on sundays because it was the only place open.  after 10 pm they'd have one or two register open, despite the fact they'd get slammed with people filling their carts for the week b/c they all just got off work.  half the time i'd end up walking out with nothing b/c i didn't want to wait in line for 30 minutes.  self checkout improved that situation immensely.

 

This, and it's not like they got rid of all the cashiers to put in those self checkout stands.  I can't even tell there's a noticeable difference in the number.  It used to be "Damn!  There aren't enough cashiers working today for how busy it is."  Now it's "Damn! There aren't enough cashiers working today for how busy it is.  Oh well, I'll just check myself out and be out of here in 5 minutes."

[52-80 19,246]

when people cite derivative, 2nd order metric as if its the primary reason to do something.

 

i read it most often in cars, "we replaced the steel exhaust with a lighter titanium one, shaving 15 pounds, to increase the power-to-weight ratio".

 

well, yes, but no.  you did that to save weight, which itself is already a good thing. 

 

a fat guy losing weight is good.  a fat guy losing weight isnt good because it decreased his BMI. 

[NeverMarryAStripper 21,921]

Losing weight in and of itself is only good if you are vain about your appearance.  The benefits are all secondary.

Edited February 21, 2020 by NeverMarryAStripper

[52-80 19,246]

3 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Losing weight in and of itself is only good if you are vain about your appearance.  The benefits are all secondary.

thats exactly what i would expect a fattie to say. 

 

 

 

 

[SilasCoade 2,622]

Yeah that's not factual as stated.