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Trivial Things That Make You Surly

elfenix

By elfenix
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NeverMarryAStripper
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If cassettes are coming back, then people will have to start carrying pencils again

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“No Trucks In Left Lane” - Waxahachie 2023:  

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Prepuce of Doom

Prepuce of Doom 20965

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3 hours ago, Lobo said:

15% of the U.S. adult population "goes" by something other than their first name.  Just in the UT ecosystem---Colt McCoy, Red McCombs, and Ricky Williams come to mind. 

I use my middle name quite frequently.  And yes, it rhymes with a part of the female anatomy.  

How's it going, Jallopian Moobs? 

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Guadaloopy

Guadaloopy 10902

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On 11/28/2021 at 7:53 PM, Sam Lin said:

Little bit of citric acid and warm water. Let it sit for 30min and come back and wipe it out. Repeat if it's a tough stain.

Powdered citric acid is cheap on Amazon. Also sold as washing machine cleaner and water kettle descaler.

If your shower heads are getting crusty or flow shitty, take them off and soak them in a bucket of water with 2 heaping tablespoons of citric acid, periodically agitate (shake the head, esp if you see it bubbling). If the bubbling stops and the head is still crusty, change the water to a fresh batch of water/acid. Repeat until the bubbling stops and head is clean.

 

On 11/29/2021 at 11:32 AM, WhatTheBuck said:

There’s also citric acid in powdered Kool-Aid lemonade. I once read a tip that you can use it to clean your toilet bowl. 

Back when I was Chief Engineer on a Frigate, we were on a solo counter-drug deployment in the Eastern Pacific.  We started having real problems with our evaporators and were only making about 20% of rated capacity for fresh water.  We opened up the evaps and saw that we had significant scaling on the heat exchanger tubes. 
 

To really make things dicey, our supply of citric acid that we would normally use to descale the tubes had gotten wet somehow and was ruined.   Since we were on our own, it would have taken weeks to get more citric acid.  We put our heads together and came up with a plan to use the bug juice (Navy version of Kool-Aid) mix from the galley as a substitute.  
 

So during our next port visit, we mixed up a huge batch of concentrated bug juice in a 55 gallon drum.   We put the tube assembly into that mix and inserted a low pressure air tube to agitate the mix.   In less than 24 hrs, the tubes looked like brand new pennies and we were back to full water-making capacity.  
 

So yeah, there’s quite a bit of acid in those drink mixes.  

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conVINCEd

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5 hours ago, Lobo said:

15% of the U.S. adult population "goes" by something other than their first name.  Just in the UT ecosystem---Colt McCoy, Red McCombs, and Ricky Williams come to mind. 

I use my middle name quite frequently.  And yes, it rhymes with a part of the female anatomy.  

I feel like if you’re going to give your kid an unconventional first name that you have an obligation to give them a normal middle name so they have options as they grow up.  Maybe Destiny will fulfill her destiny and end up on the pole, but if she becomes a lawyer, give her Jennifer or Ashley as a middle name so they can pivot if necessary.

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Guadaloopy

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9 hours ago, Sam Lin said:

Totally irrelevant now, but how was your citric acid ruined by getting wet? Should still have been completely usable, except for being crystallized into one solid block. Hammer off the chunks you need and dissolve them, and proceed with descaling.

It was bilge water, so no telling which of a thousand potential contaminants were also included.  Since we were dealing with potable water generation, we played it as safe as we could.  

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NeverMarryAStripper

NeverMarryAStripper 21780

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18 hours ago, HRSchenker said:

Name the damn kid what you're gonna call him. One of my college friends named their kid something like Michael Bradley Smith and they call him Bradley. Then fucking name him Bradley Smith.

Both of my younger kids lived with my ex and me as foster kids for almost 2 years before we adopted them.  Naturally we called them both by their birth first names.  When we adopted them we reversed their first and middle names on their new birth certificates, but we continued to call them by their birth first names which are now their middle names.  When they started school everyone called them by their adopted first names which are their birth middle names while we still called them by their birth first names.  They go back and forth without any problems.  Their Grandmother (my mom) heard one of their friends call them by their adopted first name and said "who the hell is that".  I have gotten used to switching how I refer to them depending on who I'm talking to.

On a separate note, fuck people who use "went" for the past perfect tense.  It is the simple past tense and you sound like a dumb fuck.  For example, the aggy said "I was smart enough to have went to tu if I wanted to".  Not only is that grammatically incorrect, it's factually incorrect.  So all you dumbasses who use "went" for the past perfect tense sound like hillbilly sheep fuckers.

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Guest Lobo

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3 minutes ago, Steamboat1874 said:

Dolores ?

Nope, name's Clint.  T. Clint Orvis.  But I go by Clint.  And yes, I'm an heir to the Orvis outfitter fortune.

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High Plains Drifter

High Plains Drifter 10968

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On 11/27/2021 at 4:16 PM, Superhero said:

Passive aggressive people...

We went to LEGOLand yesterday with another family yesterday. We see a photo op moment and get in line. There's another group who is kinda standing off to the side, not really in line.

We take our family photos, and ask the people next group of people if they can take a photo of our two families together. The man just walked by saying "No, not going to take you photo because you guys cut in line.". My wife, who's usually very nice, said almost apologetically "Oh, I didn't know you were line." The little bitch's wife said "Well, we were, and you guys just cut in front of us."

At which point, I turned around to face them and said, rather loudly. "Wow, kinda passive aggressive huh?." The wife was huffing and puffing, but didn't say anything.

 

Personally, when people cut in front of me, I call them out right away and tell them to get behind me. I don't wait for them to finish what they're doing, and THEN get mad at them for being being unaware, oblivious, rude, etc. It's what an adult should do instead of acting like passive-aggressive bitch men.

 

 

 

Today at lunch I went to the grocery store to pick up some bread and crap that i use to make my lunches at work. I walk up to the line with 5 or 6 things in my carrying basket thing. There are two people in line, plus a third guy who is kind of hanging back looking at his phone. As I'm kind of standing there, the two people in line become one, and there is space on the conveyor belt for the next person to unload. I wait a moment, and guy with the phone never looks up, so I start unloading. After a couple of minutes, he finally looks up and says "hey, I was in line". By this time, the cashier is working on my groceries.

My response: "sorry man, I didn't realize you were in line."

There were a few more splutters but I just ignored him.

 

 

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GringoSalado

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23 hours ago, HRSchenker said:

Name the damn kid what you're gonna call him. One of my college friends named their kid something like Michael Bradley Smith and they call him Bradley. Then fucking name him Bradley Smith.

 

 

OTOH I think it is good to give your kid a usable middle name in case they don't like their first name. Ran into a HS friend of mine who did that, nobody who knows him now calls him what we all grew up calling him. My middle name is some French bullshit family name that nobody could pronounce anyway. Thanks a lot.

On 11/30/2021 at 7:48 PM, conVINCEd said:

Just saw someone driving the wrong way down a semi-major DFW area street with their lights off.  After I picked up 2 bags and headed back home their car had knocked over a light pole.  Cops already on the scene.

Nobody knows how to operate their fucking headlights. I'm 0 for the last 100 people I flashed my lights at driving around in the dark. "Why is that dude flashing me?" You somehow managed to override your impossible-to-override headlights. Turn them on or pull off, park, and start over.

 

edit: Dumbass quoted the wrong post.

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dude at work has last 7 weeks of year to choose retirement party.  Not only does he choose a fucking Saturday, but it  is Army-Navy Day.

Unaware motherfucker...

I should show up drunk AF, directly from watching the game.  Alas, I am his boss, and must respectfully comply...

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ROFL BOX

ROFL BOX 6647

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On a separate note, fuck people who use "went" for the past perfect tense.  It is the simple past tense and you sound like a dumb fuck.  For example, the aggy said "I was smart enough to have went to tu if I wanted to".  Not only is that grammatically incorrect, it's factually incorrect.  So all you dumbasses who use "went" for the past perfect tense sound like hillbilly sheep fuckers.


Don't even get me started on that entire "Be like" bullshit.

/WhiteGuy

Sent from my SM-A326U1 using Tapatalk

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Superhero

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1 hour ago, Trey3216 said:

Getting whatever stomach bug your kiddo brings home from daycare.   Currently on Day 3 of pissing out of my ass and mild on again off again fever.   I’m tired, boss 

 

53 minutes ago, MNLonghornFUKM said:

No worries. Only like 3.5 more months to go

I got sick (mostly sniffles) for almost a year when my son first started preschool. I swear the next corona virus is going to start from a daycare / preschool. 

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ROFL BOX

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28 minutes ago, Sandman said:

Mobile phone providers only want to give you a deal if you add a line. Am I supposed to produce another child or take in a stray grandparent or something? I don't need another fucking line, I want a new phone. 

Sell. Me. A. Phone.

I don't know if you're Android or iPhong, however I paid around $ 280 for a new Samsung A32 via Best Buy.  Unlocked... no bloatware.  If that's within your budget, go for it.

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nnm

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48 minutes ago, ROFL BOX said:

I don't know if you're Android or iPhong, however I paid around $ 280 for a new Samsung A32 via Best Buy.  Unlocked... no bloatware.  If that's within your budget, go for it.

This.  I haven't bought a phone from a carrier in about 10 years.  Every phone I buy, I buy directly from Apple or a retailer.  You get screwed by buying from the carriers.

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Anwar Namtut

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On 12/10/2021 at 4:40 PM, Prepuce of Doom said:

Delivery people who don't seem to understand how doors open. Don't stack the shit right in front of where the door obviously opens, assholes. 

When my daughters (no pics) played volleyball, I was always amazed at how many people would open door, walk into gym, let door close and then stand in front of doors completely unaware that they had stopped blocking the way. Or set up their chairs in from of the doors. WTF, people?

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Prepuce of Doom

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23 minutes ago, Anwar Namtut said:

When my daughters (no pics) played volleyball, I was always amazed at how many people would open door, walk into gym, let door close and then stand in front of doors completely unaware that they had stopped blocking the way. Or set up their chairs in from of the doors. WTF, people?

Yeah, there's definitely some common kind of weird cognitive failure involving gymnasium doors. 

Or perhaps there's just a high concentration of morons found in or near gyms. 

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Superhero

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39 minutes ago, Anwar Namtut said:

When my daughters (no pics) played volleyball, I was always amazed at how many people would open door, walk into gym, let door close and then stand in front of doors completely unaware that they had stopped blocking the way. Or set up their chairs in from of the doors. WTF, people?

I understand not posting pics of your daughters But we at least get pics of her teammates in their volleyball shorts?

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19 hours ago, Sandman said:

Trying to navigate around all of the christmas decor in our house, I stubbed my toe and rolled my ankle. There's no one else at the house to bitch at, either. 

That’s just time to kill a ceramic Santa… she will never miss it.

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1 hour ago, mininghorn88 said:

When you are at a public toilet and you line the toilet ring with toilet paper or the pre-made sheet and the auto flush feature comes on and sucks the barrier away before you have a chance to sit down.

What magical power of sanitation do you think the liner possesses? My guess is that the presence or absence of the liner or TP lining the seat is immaterial from a sanitation perspective. Purely psychosomatic. 

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Guest Lobo

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Probably trying to hide the fact that the piece of power they just picked up for you was titled in bold “the Fist & the Starfish (an erotica novella by H.R. Schenker)”

they were helping you be more discrete.  
 

the cover art did not help!

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SHOOTER12

SHOOTER12 8787

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On 12/5/2021 at 4:54 PM, HRSchenker said:

Name the damn kid what you're gonna call him. One of my college friends named their kid something like Michael Bradley Smith and they call him Bradley. Then fucking name him Bradley Smith.

Fuck you.

I just HAD to be named after my dad, making me a "Jr".  I don't understand, he hated the name too, but gave it to me.  I always went by my middle name and kicked anyone's ass who called me by my horrible first name.

Side note: almost wound up named after my grandfather and dad, would have been William Wallace.

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Sandman

Sandman 3401

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1 hour ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Fuck you.

I just HAD to be named after my dad, making me a "Jr".  I don't understand, he hated the name too, but gave it to me.  I always went by my middle name and kicked anyone's ass who called me by my horrible first name.

Side note: almost wound up named after my grandfather and dad, would have been William Wallace.

I'm named after my dad but I have a different middle name, so I'm not a junior. But any of my dad's collegues or friends that would meet me would say "oh, you must be Jr" to which I'd say no. They could not grasp the idea.

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NWBuck

NWBuck 8543

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5 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

I don't understand, he hated the name too, but gave it to me. 

Did he ever talk with you about it?

Something like "Son, this world is rough, and if a man's gonna make it, he's gotta be tough. And I knew I wouldn't be there to help you along, so I give you that name, and I said goodbye.
And I knew you'd have to get tough or die- It's that name that helped to make you strong"
 
In my opinion, you ought to thank him before you die for the gravel in your gut and the spit in your eye while you're at it.
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Brother goes by his middle name, to the point that many even in the family forget it's his middle name.  It does come in handy when someone calls and asks for dude by his first name...he knows instantly that they don't know who the hell they're speaking with.

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Guest Lobo

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Yep, that's one of the other perks of going by middle name.  Plus the majority of people butcher the pronunciation of our last name.  So a scam call is easy to spot.  

Of course, the downside is I give it at a food counter for some to-go, I give 'em the name for the order, and then I get some $9/hour barely literate millennial who invariably asks, "Is that your real name?" 

"Yes, my parents wrote it on my birth certificate and sent it off to the government when I was born, they did it again when I was baptized with the same name weeks later.  Your nametag says, 'Sparkles'...and you're gonna ask me about the legitimacy of my name?"

 

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Onboard 2.0

Onboard 2.0 9083

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14 minutes ago, Lobo said:

Yep, that's one of the other perks of going by middle name.  Plus the majority of people butcher the pronunciation of our last name.  So a scam call is easy to spot.  

Of course, the downside is I give it at a food counter for some to-go, I give 'em the name for the order, and then I get some $9/hour barely literate millennial who invariably asks, "Is that your real name?" 

"Yes, my parents wrote it on my birth certificate and sent it off to the government when I was born, they did it again when I was baptized with the same name weeks later.  Your nametag says, 'Sparkles'...and you're gonna ask me about the legitimacy of my name?"

 

I used to operate my company under the name XXXXX  XXXXXX Design.  I used to get spam calls all the time asking for Mr. Design.

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