Jump to content

Trivial Things That Make You Surly

elfenix

By elfenix
in Lulz

 Share

Recommended Posts

Js1

Js1 83619

Posted
Posted

Lady next to me on my morning flight asked if I could switch with her husband bc she has “extreme anxiety” and “I’m already shaking” (the plane doesn’t take off for 20 min)

My aisle seat for his middle?

Leave Me Alone No GIF by NETFLIX

Plan better. Or take a Xanax or 2

  • Like 2
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
  • Replies 19.2k
  • Created
  • Last Reply

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Days

Top Posters In This Topic

Popular Days

Popular Posts

NeverMarryAStripper
NeverMarryAStripper

If cassettes are coming back, then people will have to start carrying pencils again

nnm
nnm
Armybrat
Armybrat

“No Trucks In Left Lane” - Waxahachie 2023:  

Posted Images

nnm

nnm 35669

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, ztejas said:

One of my favorite things to say: Your lack of prior planning does not constitue an emergency for me.

I phrase it a little differently:  Lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part.

  • Hook 'Em 1
  • Like 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites
52-80

52-80 19000

Posted
Posted
7 hours ago, Sam Lin said:

Why are you catering to them? Go eat what you want!

Teamwork and networking and all that jazz. We’re in south france and seafood restaurants dont play that vegetable game bullshit

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Superhero

Superhero 8636

Posted
Posted (edited)
On 5/14/2024 at 6:11 AM, ztejas said:

One of my favorite things to say: Your lack of prior planning does not constitue an emergency for me.

 

On 5/14/2024 at 9:09 AM, nnm said:

I phrase it a little differently:  Lack of planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part.

 

Or as they said at my first job. Piss poor planning on your part does not constitute an emergency on my part.

 

Yes, I work in construction.

Edited by Superhero
  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites
cabowabo

cabowabo 4390

Posted
Posted

People that stop in full parking lots (mostly HEB for me) waiting for someone to place groceries in their car, return their cart, and then back out and leave so they can pull in.  Meanwhile traffic gets backed up in the parking lot due to these assholes and it just makes things worse.  Also, people who insist on backing into parking spots.  Fuck all ya'll assholes.....

  • Hook 'Em 2
  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites
cabowabo

cabowabo 4390

Posted
Posted

Fast food places giving me or asking if I want jelly when I order a sausage, egg, and cheese biscuit.  Why the hell would I want to put jelly on my sausage, egg, or cheese biscuit?  If I order a biscuit that includes a protein product sandwiched between the two biscuit halves, then one should assume that jelly will not be involved in process of consuming this biscuit sangwich.   

  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Prepuce of Doom

Prepuce of Doom 20906

Posted
Posted
Just now, cabowabo said:

Fast food places giving me or asking if I want jelly when I order a sausage, egg, and cheese biscuit.  Why the hell would I want to put jelly on my sausage, egg, or cheese biscuit?  If I order a biscuit that includes a protein product sandwiched between the two biscuit halves, then one should assume that jelly will not be involved in process of consuming this biscuit sangwich.   

Who among us doesn't like to be prepared for a little impromptu analingus? 

Didn't your parents ever tell you, "don't look a gift jelly in the asshole"?!

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Vic Mackey

Vic Mackey 46716

Posted
Posted
People that stop in full parking lots (mostly HEB for me) waiting for someone to place groceries in their car, return their cart, and then back out and leave so they can pull in.  Meanwhile traffic gets backed up in the parking lot due to these assholes and it just makes things worse.  Also, people who insist on backing into parking spots.  Fuck all ya'll assholes.....
Not trivial at all. These people can fuck off. Go drive a little bit and walk you lazy fuck. I always prefer to park as far back from the store as possible. Easier exit and not having to deal with all the traffic up front.
  • Hook 'Em 2
  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites
DigglerontheHoof

DigglerontheHoof 20595

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, cabowabo said:

Fast food places giving me or asking if I want jelly when I order a sausage, egg, and cheese biscuit.  Why the hell would I want to put jelly on my sausage, egg, or cheese biscuit?  If I order a biscuit that includes a protein product sandwiched between the two biscuit halves, then one should assume that jelly will not be involved in process of consuming this biscuit sangwich.   

I won’t eat a sausage/bacon, egg and cheese biscuit without jelly.  Well, I will but I won’t enjoy it as much.

  • Hook 'Em 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites
gofuckyourself

gofuckyourself 8066

Posted
Posted

The baggage handler -- sorry, Airline Ramp Agent -- making $15/hour doesn't give a shit about golf clubs and just wants to clock out and get drunk?

I'm frankly shocked and appalled.

Narrator: He also doesn't give a shit about every other bag he's grabbing off the belt on the 35 to 110+ degree tarmac that reeks of jet fuel and exhaust.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
ABSR

ABSR 5275

Posted
Posted
6 hours ago, Sam Lin said:

Is anyone actually surprised by that? That's why your clubs are in a shipping bag. You think anyone treats them differently?

This is how I expect they handle all bags.  My only surprise is that someone thinks this is out of line.

I will say if they moved the cart/luggage car closer they could throw directly from the ramp to the cart and save effort.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Vic Mackey

Vic Mackey 46716

Posted
Posted
Is anyone actually surprised by that? That's why your clubs are in a shipping bag. You think anyone treats them differently?
Yep. And show the USPS, UPS, FedEx unloaders/loaders and how they handle packages. They don't give a shit either.
Link to comment
Share on other sites
  • Popular Post
Okie State

Okie State 3708

Posted
  • Popular Post
Posted

When I make an effort to either park away from people or leave plenty of space and still come out to a nice deep door ding and gouge in my paint. Somehow in almost 40 years of life I've managed to never give any other car a door ding yet I see other dumbfucks doing it regularly with zero fucks given. It makes no difference if it's a 35 year old beater or a one of a kind vintage whatever the fuck...it's not mine so I'm not going to touch it.

In summary, fuck people. They suck.

  • Hook 'Em 7
  • Like 2
  • Rage+1 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites
HRSchenker

HRSchenker 2224

Posted
Posted
3 hours ago, Okie State said:

When I make an effort to either park away from people or leave plenty of space and still come out to a nice deep door ding and gouge in my paint. Somehow in almost 40 years of life I've managed to never give any other car a door ding yet I see other dumbfucks doing it regularly with zero fucks given. It makes no difference if it's a 35 year old beater or a one of a kind vintage whatever the fuck...it's not mine so I'm not going to touch it.

In summary, fuck people. They suck.

I'm not a scientist but in my Tesla owners group I've noticed that the folks who do their best to park away from others or hug the curb on those one-sided spots tend to report door dings more than the rest of us who park randomly and without a care in the world. It's a strange phenomenon. 

  • Hook 'Em 1
  • Rage+1 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Okie State

Okie State 3708

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, HRSchenker said:

I'm not a scientist but in my Tesla owners group I've noticed that the folks who do their best to park away from others or hug the curb on those one-sided spots tend to report door dings more than the rest of us who park randomly and without a care in the world. It's a strange phenomenon. 

The only time I've ever got a door ding was when I thought I'll be normal this time and park in a normal spot and it will be fine. Sure enough I was wrong.

Link to comment
Share on other sites
52-80

52-80 19000

Posted
Posted

I have a car that I plan to sell imminently, after my visitor here completes a road trip with it.

Yesterday at 2AM my phone rings: "i need your insurance info for towing/roadside assistance.  the rear tire blew". All the tires are at 50% treadlife. Local shop says the tire is not repairable (I think they're just lazy to work on a tire with sound-deadening foam liner). AND they replace it with a budget'ish Nankang, which are now mismatched on the car.

Later at 6PM my phone rings: "im so sorry, the front tire just blew up". Tow truck guy also confirms this time it's a pretty big gash on the sidewall, so for sure irreparable. This new shop has a matching Michelin, but now we're paying a premium for a car that will be sold to a dealer next week anyway.

In all about $700 is going to be completely blown, because that expenditure can't be recouped when the car has a bunch of rubbers that are mismatched in age and brands. Kinda wish we had access to a Mexican shop who would throw on some used hoops for $20.

 

Link to comment
Share on other sites
Native Horn

Native Horn 3465

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, 52-80 said:

I have a car that I plan to sell imminently, after my visitor here completes a road trip with it.

Yesterday at 2AM my phone rings: "i need your insurance info for towing/roadside assistance.  the rear tire blew". All the tires are at 50% treadlife. Local shop says the tire is not repairable (I think they're just lazy to work on a tire with sound-deadening foam liner). AND they replace it with a budget'ish Nankang, which are now mismatched on the car.

Later at 6PM my phone rings: "im so sorry, the front tire just blew up". Tow truck guy also confirms this time it's a pretty big gash on the sidewall, so for sure irreparable. This new shop has a matching Michelin, but now we're paying a premium for a car that will be sold to a dealer next week anyway.

In all about $700 is going to be completely blown, because that expenditure can't be recouped when the car has a bunch of rubbers that are mismatched in age and brands. Kinda wish we had access to a Mexican shop who would throw on some used hoops for $20.

 

Pics of female visitor?

  • Like 2
  • Haha 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Bender Bending Rodriguez

Bender Bending Rodriguez 1662

Posted
Posted
On 11/1/2023 at 9:11 PM, Sandman said:

People that list things for sale and say "This won't last long!!!". If you're selling it and you know it will sell quick, why do you have to tell us? Just post it and let it sell. This goes double for douchebags on facebook and car dealerships. 

Whataburger has been offering the Patty Melt as available for “a limited time” since 2004. 

  • Haha 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites
Okie State

Okie State 3708

Posted
Posted

The topic of people tossing bags of dog shit in random trash cans has been mentioned many times. Someone actually walked up to my trash can that was by my garage to deposit their baggie of dog shit. Haven't seen that one before.

  • Rage+1 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites
nnm

nnm 35669

Posted
Posted (edited)
46 minutes ago, Brisketexan said:

The name of the small shopping center on Burnet Road: “Casa Plaza.” It’s from the 60s, I’m sure, but clearly they just took two Spanish words and said “there, that’s a name.”

 A couple of times I’ve come across bars named “Pinche’s.”  There used to be one in Webster. I know it’s an extremely versatile word, but basically a bar named that is called “F’ers.”  The English-speaking clerks at the business license obviously DGAF.  

Here’s a good one for Spanish-speakers (my first language), particularly for Mexican Spanish speakers (accent):

 

Edited by nnm
  • Hook 'Em 1
  • Like 2
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

×
 Share
Go to topic listing


Football ... Basketball ... Baseball ... Other Sports ... Futbol ... 🤫995🤫 ... Gambling ... Movies & TV ... Music ... Hobbies ... Lulz ... Food & Travel ... Daily Texan ... Business and Markets ... Cloak Room ... Help ... For Sale ... Board Discussion ... Subscribe!... Donate!... Advertise... COOKIE MONSTER!

×
×
  • Create New...