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Posted
4 hours ago, elfenix said:

is she still going? 

 

who was the other amateurish chick from back then? heather deep throats or something?  edit: ideepthroat i think it was

Heather Harmon. Too bad she was working when internet bandwidth limitations only allowed for short, tiny videos. 

http://thoughtcatalog.com/hersh-bavnik/2013/12/the-legend-of-heather-i-deepthroat-an-incomplete-story-of-americas-greatest-porn-star/

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Posted
Wet socks drive me insane. Don’t know why but I hate it

 

A) expand on this. You mean like, your socks become wet, and then you don’t change or otherwise remove your socks when you’re done doing the thing that got them wet? Is this a regular thing?

 

B ) latest?cb=20130202001524

 

Posted
26 minutes ago, ButtFumble said:

stores that put out their own store coupon for shit that they do not stock in the store

who in the fuck lets that shit happen

Stores that want you to come in but don't want to lose money on sales

Posted
8 hours ago, NorthLoop said:

Heating up a plate of leftovers, and the mashed potatoes take like 3x as long to get hot as the rest of the food. 

If you flatten the mashed potatoes, spread out on the plate, they'll heat up just as fast. Then you can reshape them to your liking.

Posted
9 minutes ago, Lone Star Horn said:

If you flatten the mashed potatoes, spread out on the plate, they'll heat up just as fast. Then you can reshape them to your liking.

2071984828_eda44c7943.jpg

"Everywhere I look, something reminds me of her"

-Frank Drebin

  • Like 4
Posted
7 hours ago, GoPokes83 said:

Fat models that are now included in every clothing ad on TV.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Seriously, what happened to media being aspirational rather than delusional?

Posted (edited)

vehicles with "sports exhaust" that are slow as shit driven by people that are equally slow as shit

lowered trucks especially a dually

Edited by ButtFumble
Posted
On 4/4/2018 at 7:28 AM, Okie State said:

Piece of shit stoplights that go out every time it rains.

What is the deal with this shit. Tarrant County is lousy with this problem. 

We have put men on the moon, you'd think we could engineer a stop light that is water resistant. 

  • Like 1
Posted

People who get into a crowded elevator and face the rear of the elevator car. Heaven forbid it is on a low floor and then you have 20-30 floors worth of awkward eye contact ahead of you. 

Posted

The word “methinks” and most of the assholes who use it. “Methinks they should put in Applewhite over Simms.” “Chiles should start, methinks.”

Listen up little lord fuckface. You’re not impressing anyone with your mastery of the Queen’s English, and you sure as shit aren’t going to be mistaken for the Bard. You mostly come across as the dipshit who’s trying way too hard at the renfest.

169?cb=20100510013355

  • Like 1
Posted
5 minutes ago, Player said:

The word “methinks” and most of the assholes who use it. “Methinks they should put in Applewhite over Simms.” “Chiles should start, methinks.”

Listen up little lord fuckface. You’re not impressing anyone with your mastery of the Queen’s English, and you sure as shit aren’t going to be mistaken for the Bard. You mostly come across as the dipshit who’s trying way too hard at the renfest.

169?cb=20100510013355
 

Couldst you explain more? 

Posted

Not being able to leave a comment on rep. Yes, even on the pos rep, it was a chance to make another funny or just tell someone why you liked/ disliked it.

Posted
9 hours ago, Celery Man said:

same deal but with plethora.  people think they're pulling out something arcane and "smart" but it's just a stupid ugly word.

Do you know what it means to have a plethora?

Posted

getting an email from Freebirds on 4-7-2018 letting me know that 4-5-2018 is National Burrito Day and telling me about the offers they will have to celebrate that

fucking idiots

Posted

A few of my senior executives will send me an email telling me they will need my answer COB (close of business) or EOD (end of day). Then they use lowercase initials of their first and last name to sign off.

Because, you know, they are way to busy to type their full name.

Posted
2 minutes ago, BurntOrangeCrush said:

A few of my senior executives will send me an email telling me they will need my answer COB (close of business) or EOD (end of day). Then they use lowercase initials of their first and last name to sign off.

Because, you know, they are way to busy to type their full name.

 

forward that to your IT guy and ask him to show those dumb shits how to place a signature in their email

Posted (edited)
9 minutes ago, ButtFumble said:

 

forward that to your IT guy and ask him to show those dumb shits how to place a signature in their email

"Official" company signatures suck balls. A couple months back we were directed to format all email sigs a certain way that includes the corporate logo. This logo appears on recipients emails to be an attachment, not to mention the sig is supposed to include business #, direct #, fax #, office location etc..etc... w/each on a separate line

Fuck you. 2 years ago we were directed to have sigs that were only one line, that is, name, ph# etc.. all on the same line so as to not take up too much vertical space. I liked that. 

This new shit is so stupid and takes up 6 or more lines vertically. Half of the email space is devoted to my fucking signature. Retards.

Edited by El Diablo
Posted
On 4/5/2018 at 5:06 AM, ButtFumble said:

stores that put out their own store coupon for shit that they do not stock in the store

who in the fuck lets that shit happen

At HEB yesterday and was buying something that had a coupon to buy this product get another product for free.  Slight problem, they didn't carry the product I was supposed to get for free.

Posted

(Maybe more than trivial as it’s happened to my wife and I the last 3 times out.)

 

People that bring their infants/toddler to a nice restaurant on Friday/Saturday night.

 

Then polite society forces us to smile through your teeth and say “we understand. We’re parents too.”

 

It’s not okay. You know damn well it’s not okay. I don’t know what the cutoff is; $100, white table cloth, no kids menu, I don’t know, but there’s a line and you crossed it.

 

Fuck y’all! You can afford the drinks and plates you can afford a fucking sitter like the rest of us.

 

  • Like 1
Posted
On 4/6/2018 at 9:36 AM, PvilleStang said:

^^^ 

Image result for plethora

 

On 4/6/2018 at 9:37 AM, Cheeseweasel said:

It's a sweater!

 

On 4/6/2018 at 6:06 PM, WhatTheBuck said:

Do you know what it means to have a plethora?

It is the preferred nomenclature for requesting if an adequate quantity of pinatas have been aquired (e.g. Would you say we have a plethora of pinatas?)

Posted
The word “methinks” and most of the assholes who use it. “Methinks they should put in Applewhite over Simms.” “Chiles should start, methinks.”

 

Listen up little lord fuckface. You’re not impressing anyone with your mastery of the Queen’s English, and you sure as shit aren’t going to be mistaken for the Bard. You mostly come across as the dipshit who’s trying way too hard at the renfest.

 

 

Yep, those people and the ones who use "whilst" sound like fucking morons.

 

Posted
4 hours ago, Llano Estacado said:

(Maybe more than trivial as it’s happened to my wife and I the last 3 times out.)

 

People that bring their infants/toddler to a nice restaurant on Friday/Saturday night.

 

Then polite society forces us to smile through your teeth and say “we understand. We’re parents too.”

 

It’s not okay. You know damn well it’s not okay. I don’t know what the cutoff is; $100, white table cloth, no kids menu, I don’t know, but there’s a line and you crossed it.

 

Fuck y’all! You can afford the drinks and plates you can afford a fucking sitter like the rest of us.

 

Yep.  Go the fuck away, you selfish fucks.  

Posted

Thick milkshakes... I'm not trying to bring any boys to the yard, so I don't like them thick.  It's been about 30 minutes since I ordered the fucking thing, and I STILL can't drink it.  I'm seriously fucking ragey, to the point I thought about driving back to the shake shack and throwing the fucking thing at the window.  It's either the shake of the piece of shit fucking straw that collapses in every time I try to take a drink.  Serenity fucking now.

  • Like 2
Posted



It's either the shake of the piece of shit fucking straw that collapses in every time I try to take a drink.  Serenity fucking now.


You just need to recognize that you don't have a milkshake. You have ice cream. And compared to all the things the guys at shake shack could have put in your cup, ice cream is pretty good.

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