Lauren Boobert - Tits and a Gun

[Gil Bang 25998]

 

https://twitter.com/nypost/status/1703138927064862818

 

 

[jimmyjazz 46094]

24 minutes ago, Brandywine said:

Lauren is the best and brightest of 300,000 people in her district. 

[speed817 19439]

33 minutes ago, Grade of D as in David said:

Won't find that kind of evidence....she's been taking it all and aborting.....

[Nivek 16979]

She was just searching for a secret hunter biden hard drive in her date’s pants.

[Underdog 28767]

Just showing off her stick shift skills. 

[Born to Run 6569]

From the window, to the wall!

[956 Worldwide 34746]

“The tradition seemed almost as old as the Rockies themselves. A few pre-show cocktails, a Tropical Mango vape rip, and a dry handjob at a sold-out musical production. But can in survive cancel culture?” 

[jimmyjazz 46094]

The sad thing is, had she not been kicked out for vaping, she would have surely been caught on security video going all Alanis beej in the middle of the show.

[Fastbreak 3990]

Wait. You are telling me Bobo was lying? There must be some mistake. I’m pretty shocked.

[Pato del Muerto 52568]

6 hours ago, jimmyjazz said:

Damn I lost it at "Weeney Todd".

Demon barber of skeet street

[Beau Vine 54381]

 

[Bullneck 19200]

[YGIFS 19452]

Absolutely perfect.  I got my first handjob at a Christian Youth Summit after we had movie night and they let the boys and girls stay up late and hang out after lights out.  And the movie we watched (you don't forget shit like this)?  You guessed it.  "Beetlejuice."  

[Beau Vine 54381]

32 minutes ago, YGIFS said:

Absolutely perfect.  I got my first handjob at a Christian Youth Summit after we had movie night and they let the boys and girls stay up late and hang out after lights out.  And the movie we watched (you don't forget shit like this)?  You guessed it.  "Beetlejuice."  

And the man who gave you that handjob?  You guessed it...

[Sawbonz 27584]

58 minutes ago, Bullneck said:

 

[Nice Guy Eddie 13521]

I wonder how many people are surprised to learn that theaters have night vision/low-light cameras?

[Nivek 16979]

9 hours ago, Bullneck said:

party of family values!   I want to go with my wife and a vape pen, maybe a bucket of popcorn.

[Francisco 2.0 32416]

 

 

 

 

[HenryJames 66160]

 

[Thrawn 538]

I like how she conveniently leaves out the titty tweaking and crank yanking from her list of alleged wrong doings.

[Ten Bears 2483]

1 hour ago, Nice Guy Eddie said:

I wonder how many people are surprised to learn that theaters have night vision/low-light cameras?

[Js1 85526]

25 minutes ago, HenryJames said:

 

Something was definitely getting edged 

[Macanudo 13009]

12 hours ago, Bullneck said:

Tickets are $50 and I have some free time on my hands.   But even I'm not bored enough to subject myself to this.

[Grade of D as in David 13253]

19 minutes ago, Macanudo said:

Tickets are $50 and I have some free time on my hands.   But even I'm not bored enough to subject myself to this.

You might get a handjob out of it 

[Macanudo 13009]

8 minutes ago, Grade of D as in David said:

You might get a handjob out of it 

But it might be from Kimberly Guilfoyle.

[elfenix 34331]

8 minutes ago, Grade of D as in David said:

You might get a handjob out of it 

[Sawbonz 27584]

51 minutes ago, Thrawn said:

I like how she conveniently leaves out the titty tweaking and crank yanking from her list of alleged wrong doings.

If titty tweaking is wrong I don’t want to be right 

[Gatorubet 30289]

People are being way too harsh on Boebert.  As a 36 year old gramma whose kid just knocked up a 15 year old, why can’t everyone recognize her excellent role model in showing young women how to give hand jobs instead of letting demon seed into their va-jay-jays?

So the next time you see a video of Boebert getting anal in a church pew, ponder the excellent job she is doing demonstrating how to prevent teen pregnancy. 

[Gatorubet 30289]

6 hours ago, Nice Guy Eddie said:

I wonder how many people are surprised to learn that theaters have night vision/low-light cameras?

[jimmyjazz 46094]

. . . but too soon.

[Buzzrock 14936]

People are being way too harsh on Boebert.  As a 36 year old gramma whose kid just knocked up a 15 year old, why can’t everyone recognize her excellent role model in showing young women how to give hand jobs instead of letting demon seed into their va-jay-jays?
So the next time you see a video of Boebert getting anal in a church pew, ponder the excellent job she is doing demonstrating how to prevent teen pregnancy. 

Seems like she represents 2023 America pretty well to me.

[Underdog 28767]

1 hour ago, Gatorubet said:

Heard any good jokes lately? 

[Gatorubet 30289]

29 minutes ago, Underdog said:

Heard any good jokes lately? 

A penguin had to take his car for engine repair. The mechanic told the penguin to leave his car with him for about two hours, to find out whats wrong. The penguin goes across the street to a grocery store, climbs into a freezer and ate vanilla ice cream. Eventually the penguin went back to the garage to find out what happened to his car. When the penguin entered the garage, the mechanic looked at him and said, "Looks like you blew a seal."

The penguin replied, “Nope, but I killed some time waiting at a Beetlejuice show and sat next to Boebert’s date!”

Wait…did you say “good?”

[F250 28814]

39 minutes ago, Gatorubet said:

A penguin had to take his car for engine repair. The mechanic told the penguin to leave his car with him for about two hours, to find out whats wrong. The penguin goes across the street to a grocery store, climbs into a freezer and ate vanilla ice cream. Eventually the penguin went back to the garage to find out what happened to his car. When the penguin entered the garage, the mechanic looked at him and said, "Looks like you blew a seal."

The penguin replied, “Nope, but I killed some time waiting at a Beetlejuice show and sat next to Boebert’s date!”

Wait…did you say “good?”

 

 

[tchookem 3905]

I'm trying to not make this into something more than a white trash ditch pig doing ditch pig things. But I do wonder what her reaction to the Obamas doing something like this would be.

PS - I will forever be grateful to @Bama Chick for putting ditch pig in my lexicon.

[Gatorubet 30289]

17 minutes ago, tchookem said:

I'm trying to not make this into something more than a white trash ditch pig doing ditch pig things. But I do wonder what her reaction to the Obamas doing something like this would be.

Was Obama snacking on fancy French mustard and wearing a tan suit while getting his handy?

PS - I will forever be grateful to @Bama Chick for putting ditch pig in my lexicon.

Co-sign

 

[Grade of D as in David 13253]

41 minutes ago, tchookem said:

I'm trying to not make this into something more than a white trash ditch pig doing ditch pig things. But I do wonder what her reaction to the Obamas doing something like this would be.

PS - I will forever be grateful to @Bama Chick for putting ditch pig in my lexicon.

If President Obama were seen wearing a tan suit AND grabbing Michelle's tits at a theater performance they would either push to end all performances because they promote "grooming" or push for resegregation so their children won't be subjected the uncontrollable carnal desires of "those people".

[Boss Hogg 808]

 

[Biff Tannen 45712]

23 hours ago, YGIFS said:

Absolutely perfect.  I got my first handjob at a Christian Youth Summit after we had movie night and they let the boys and girls stay up late and hang out after lights out.  And the movie we watched (you don't forget shit like this)?  You guessed it.  "Beetlejuice."  

God. Damn. Simulation. 

[TexasEd 8071]

On 9/16/2023 at 10:29 PM, YGIFS said:

Absolutely perfect.  I got my first handjob at a Christian Youth Summit after we had movie night and they let the boys and girls stay up late and hang out after lights out.  And the movie we watched (you don't forget shit like this)?  You guessed it.  "Beetlejuice."  

Probably Lauren's mom

[jimmyjazz 46094]

11 minutes ago, TexasEd said:

Probably Lauren's mom

Lauren's mom?  It was Lauren.  He was a 25 YO counselor at the time.

[NWBuck 8582]

1 hour ago, Biff Tannen said:

God. Blessed. Stimulation. 

Fixed for Christian Youth Summit accuracy. "Laying on of hands" indeed. 

Edited September 18, 2023 by NWBuck

[NeverMarryAStripper 21920]

I hope that guy gets some antibiotics before his dicm falls off

[tx ind 7013]

9 hours ago, Boss Hogg said:

 

[Beau Vine 54381]

10 hours ago, TexasEd said:

Probably Lauren's mom

Frank Stallone.  Come on!

[YGIFS 19452]

 You shouldn't have to explain a good joke.  

But it does bring up another point that got lost in that Youth Minister thread.  How sad is it that there's parents in the Houston area telling their kids, "I don't know about sending you to this youth retreat, even if it is conservative Christians like us.  I've heard stories of boys and girls pairing to do above the clothes stuff that God does not approve of, vaping drugs, smuggling in cups of alcohol, and who the devil knows what else.  What's that?  Lauren Boebert is gonna be there?  Well then, let's get you signed up.  Here's some extra money so you can have fun with everyone."  

[Goredho 17413]

Seen on FB today…

[UTCzech III 2907]

Yeah, it's all about the vaping.

 

[Pescado_Rojo 19428]

It's because she has the audacity to date a democrat! Can't have no race...err... politics mixin! 

[SydneyCarton 48150]

10 minutes ago, UTCzech III said:

Yeah, it's all about the vaping.

 

I'm actually pretty surprised they dropped her. What, being a grandma at 38 and married to a husband who is a sex offender wasn't enough to think "Maybe she's not a good fit." But some over the pants stuff and vaping? Well ok. 

But don't worry everyone, the youth is still in good hands with this slate of good-fearing Christians and absolutely not amoral sociopathic fascsits:

Edited September 18, 2023 by SydneyCarton