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Posted

The other day I was busy laying some serious pipe over at your mother's house. I mentioned something about Applewhite, and she swung around and backhanded me really hard with her left hand (always thought she was right handed, but oh well). We went on to have the best "aggressive" sex we've ever had.  /csb

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Posted

Applewhite was like Tom Herman; had a lot of gutsy upset type wins (probably not as many as it seems) but also shit the bed against teams he and Texas should’ve dominated. His noodle arm limited the teams’ ceiling. Despite the perception, especially by frat boys, players at that time almost unanimously said Applewhite was the divisive one who thought his dick entered the locker room a minute before he did, while Simms tried to be one of the guys despite being the #1 recruit in the country and son of NFL HOFer. 

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Posted
Applewhite was like Tom Herman; had a lot of gutsy upset type wins (probably not as many as it seems) but also shit the bed against teams he and Texas should’ve dominated. His noodle arm limited the teams’ ceiling. Despite the perception, especially by frat boys, players at that time almost unanimously said Applewhite was the divisive one who thought his dick entered the locker room a minute before he did, while Simms tried to be one of the guys despite being the #1 recruit in the country and son of NFL HOFer. 
Simms is a good dude and was a good player. However, showing up to jester in a limo your first day doesn't exactly scream just one of the guys.
Posted (edited)
6 hours ago, DCA_HORN said:
8 hours ago, Murfdogg21 said:
Applewhite was like Tom Herman; had a lot of gutsy upset type wins (probably not as many as it seems) but also shit the bed against teams he and Texas should’ve dominated. His noodle arm limited the teams’ ceiling. Despite the perception, especially by frat boys, players at that time almost unanimously said Applewhite was the divisive one who thought his dick entered the locker room a minute before he did, while Simms tried to be one of the guys despite being the #1 recruit in the country and son of NFL HOFer. 

Simms is a good dude and was a good player. However, showing up to jester in a limo your first day doesn't exactly scream just one of the guys.

On my first day all my stupid bitches and ungrateful hos showed up in a limo.  I  choppered in.   
 

How did you show up?  Moped?

Edited by deadshank
Posted

I still want to know who holds the record for highest percentage of intercepted throws returned for touchdowns.  My money would be on Simms.

Posted
16 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Never trust someone who wouldn't bang a chubby equipment manager

...While their wife is pregnant?

Posted
Simms is a good dude and was a good player. However, showing up to jester in a limo your first day doesn't exactly scream just one of the guys.

While in Grad school, a post doc and I were at the same hotel in San Francisco with our adviser and we had the same flight home. He had a rental car, and was checking out at the same time. I called a cab for James and myself. What arrived was a limo. My advisors faced dropped seeing us get in and drive away. I asked the driver and he explained they ran out of regular taxis that shift.
Posted
10 hours ago, smokebomb said:

Chris providing his take on the situation from a few years ago:


The Applewhite discussion begins at 30:25. 

Cool.  A Simms discussion with Giovanni Ribisi.

Posted

Never seen that clip, that was great.  Team Applewhite my whole life and it may have changed my mind.  It's hilarious that Simms knows Applewhite's body fat percentage numbers.  And 27 something seems high for a QB.

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Posted

At Texas:

Simms: 58.7%; 7.8 YPA; 58 TD; 31 INT; 138.4 rating

Major: 57.4%; 7.8 YPA; 60 TD; 28 INT; 136.6 rating

They were remarkably similar, almost identical production. But nobody expected anything of Major, and everyone expected Simms to be an all-timer. So, Major was perceived to be the "over-achiever" and Simms the "underachiever." People root for the underdog. But that doesn't mean he was better. 

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Posted
On 1/19/2021 at 6:35 AM, AnTiM said:

I still want to know who holds the record for highest percentage of intercepted throws returned for touchdowns.  My money would be on Simms.

AP080816049714.thumb.jpg.3191035b56987f2f5c73cf6849212952.jpg

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Posted
22 hours ago, Hank Chinaski said:

At Texas:

Simms: 58.7%; 7.8 YPA; 58 TD; 31 INT; 138.4 rating

Major: 57.4%; 7.8 YPA; 60 TD; 28 INT; 136.6 rating

They were remarkably similar, almost identical production. But nobody expected anything of Major, and everyone expected Simms to be an all-timer. So, Major was perceived to be the "over-achiever" and Simms the "underachiever." People root for the underdog. But that doesn't mean he was better. 


They were almost identical. Unless it really mattered.

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Posted
23 hours ago, Hozz said:

Never seen that clip, that was great.  Team Applewhite my whole life and it may have changed my mind.  It's hilarious that Simms knows Applewhite's body fat percentage numbers.  And 27 something seems high for a QB.

Never seen that clip either.  From someone that knew them both pretty well everything Chris said is 100% true.  Bet he's wanted to get that off his chest for a long time dealing with all the idiot major cultists.  Fired me up again.  

Posted

That's a great clip of Simms, guy should have gone to Tennessee. 

Imagine how much more we would have won if Mack wasn't such a pussy? 

Posted
On 1/18/2021 at 4:28 PM, Armybrat said:

One thing for sure, Simms probably never resorted to banging a chubby equipment manager. 

And Applewhite never threw 4 interceptions in a half in a conference championship game against a team they beat 41-7 earlier in the season.

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Posted
On 1/18/2021 at 4:26 PM, UncleSonny said:

Vince-Lane-Colt-Street is the Texas qb Mt. Rushmore. #5 is where the debate starts. 

Simms>Major tho.

#5-7 are pretty easy.  Just the order is in question.

Major, Sam, Peter.

Peter gets on the list if for no other reason than the story of his senior year playing baseball.  Gardere is the only Texas QB to beat OU 4 straight years.  He also played baseball.  OU fans were heckling him in the outfield.  He just quietly held up 4 fingers.  Heckling stopped.

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Posted
On 1/18/2021 at 5:14 PM, UncleSonny said:

 

Whoa, who knew. Relatively active too, I guess it's mainly for the olds? No offense to any olds.

Sadly it seems like Longhornfanzone is no longer with us:

image.thumb.png.f7c165a8396c027722c14cd2a3e10042.png

I think Charlie Strong killed it.  Checked in one day and it was gone.

Posted
4 minutes ago, bullet said:

I think Charlie Strong killed it.  Checked in one day and it was gone.

Was thinking BurntOrange Fan Zone.  It was populated by the deadenders from the Longhorn Fan Zone when it went dark.  I discovered it 2-3 months after LHFZ bit the dust.

Wheeler would pop in to BOFZ periodically.

Posted
22 minutes ago, bullet said:

#5-7 are pretty easy.  Just the order is in question.

Major, Sam, Peter.

Peter gets on the list if for no other reason than the story of his senior year playing baseball.  Gardere is the only Texas QB to beat OU 4 straight years.  He also played baseball.  OU fans were heckling him in the outfield.  He just quietly held up 4 fingers.  Heckling stopped.

This James Brown erasure will not stand. 

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Posted
On 1/18/2021 at 3:26 PM, UncleSonny said:

Vince-Lane-Colt-Street is the Texas qb Mt. Rushmore. #5 is where the debate starts. 

Simms>Major tho.

y no Gardere?

 

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Posted

Major was so clutch.....after he put us in a fucking hole. Never understood that love.

Glad to hear Chris loves Texas from that clip. Anyone watching games new major wasn’t well liked and didn’t spend a minute working out. 
 

God our play calling was so frustrating back then. With all that talent, Mack was never ready to unleash it when it mattered most.

Posted
44 minutes ago, TexasEd said:

y no Gardere?

 

Because Mt. Rushmore arbitrarily only has 4 spots I guess. First three are pretty unimpeachable and I think you’d be hard pressed to make an argument for Gardere over Street but I’m open to hear it. 

It’s not like I saw either of them play. First qb I can remember is Shea Morenz. 

Posted
On 1/18/2021 at 5:34 PM, Ignatius said:

Reminiscent of the Morenz/JB debates on the Hookem.com/360 boards back in the prehistoric internet days...

I wanted to believe in Morenz so badly, but you never come back from losing to Rice.

Posted

Here's the thing and there's no way around it. Major was a lot more clutch and had a killer instinct the Simms never did. It's not his fault really, he inherited it. There would never have been 20 years of this argument if Simms performed even close to what he was capable of.

Posted
53 minutes ago, Somnio said:

Why the fuck is Matt Nordgren always left out of these debates?

Makes me think, who was the best Longhorn to wear #7? All the names that come to mind as of late (Nordgren, Gilbert, Marcus Johnson, Caden Sterns) were mostly meh.

Posted
2 minutes ago, satyanash said:

Makes me think, who was the best Longhorn to wear #7? All the names that come to mind as of late (Nordgren, Gilbert, Marcus Johnson, Caden Sterns) were mostly meh.

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Posted
Makes me think, who was the best Longhorn to wear #7? All the names that come to mind as of late (Nordgren, Gilbert, Marcus Johnson, Caden Sterns) were mostly meh.
Michael Huff for one.
Posted
5 minutes ago, DCA_HORN said:

Here's the thing and there's no way around it. Major was a lot more clutch and had a killer instinct the Simms never did. It's not his fault really, he inherited it. There would never have been 20 years of this argument if Simms performed even close to what he was capable of.

Here is the thing: Chris Simms was 0-3 against OU and sucked complete shit all three times. If you want to come here and be QB you don't suck against OU. And if you do suck against OU you better be Vince Young.

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Posted
1 hour ago, DCA_HORN said:

Here's the thing and there's no way around it. Major was a lot more clutch and had a killer instinct the Simms never did. It's not his fault really, he inherited it. There would never have been 20 years of this argument if Simms performed even close to what he was capable of.

Selective. Fucking. Memory.

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