Jump to content

Simms v Applewhite: Offseason Thread of Dominance


Ricky's one-hitter

Recommended Posts

The other day I was busy laying some serious pipe over at your mother's house. I mentioned something about Applewhite, and she swung around and backhanded me really hard with her left hand (always thought she was right handed, but oh well). We went on to have the best "aggressive" sex we've ever had.  /csb

  • Hook 'Em 1
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Applewhite was like Tom Herman; had a lot of gutsy upset type wins (probably not as many as it seems) but also shit the bed against teams he and Texas should’ve dominated. His noodle arm limited the teams’ ceiling. Despite the perception, especially by frat boys, players at that time almost unanimously said Applewhite was the divisive one who thought his dick entered the locker room a minute before he did, while Simms tried to be one of the guys despite being the #1 recruit in the country and son of NFL HOFer. 

  • Hook 'Em 1
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Applewhite was like Tom Herman; had a lot of gutsy upset type wins (probably not as many as it seems) but also shit the bed against teams he and Texas should’ve dominated. His noodle arm limited the teams’ ceiling. Despite the perception, especially by frat boys, players at that time almost unanimously said Applewhite was the divisive one who thought his dick entered the locker room a minute before he did, while Simms tried to be one of the guys despite being the #1 recruit in the country and son of NFL HOFer. 
Simms is a good dude and was a good player. However, showing up to jester in a limo your first day doesn't exactly scream just one of the guys.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

6 hours ago, DCA_HORN said:
8 hours ago, Murfdogg21 said:
Applewhite was like Tom Herman; had a lot of gutsy upset type wins (probably not as many as it seems) but also shit the bed against teams he and Texas should’ve dominated. His noodle arm limited the teams’ ceiling. Despite the perception, especially by frat boys, players at that time almost unanimously said Applewhite was the divisive one who thought his dick entered the locker room a minute before he did, while Simms tried to be one of the guys despite being the #1 recruit in the country and son of NFL HOFer. 

Simms is a good dude and was a good player. However, showing up to jester in a limo your first day doesn't exactly scream just one of the guys.

On my first day all my stupid bitches and ungrateful hos showed up in a limo.  I  choppered in.   
 

How did you show up?  Moped?

Edited by deadshank
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Simms is a good dude and was a good player. However, showing up to jester in a limo your first day doesn't exactly scream just one of the guys.

While in Grad school, a post doc and I were at the same hotel in San Francisco with our adviser and we had the same flight home. He had a rental car, and was checking out at the same time. I called a cab for James and myself. What arrived was a limo. My advisors faced dropped seeing us get in and drive away. I asked the driver and he explained they ran out of regular taxis that shift.
Link to comment
Share on other sites

At Texas:

Simms: 58.7%; 7.8 YPA; 58 TD; 31 INT; 138.4 rating

Major: 57.4%; 7.8 YPA; 60 TD; 28 INT; 136.6 rating

They were remarkably similar, almost identical production. But nobody expected anything of Major, and everyone expected Simms to be an all-timer. So, Major was perceived to be the "over-achiever" and Simms the "underachiever." People root for the underdog. But that doesn't mean he was better. 

  • Hook 'Em 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

22 hours ago, Hank Chinaski said:

At Texas:

Simms: 58.7%; 7.8 YPA; 58 TD; 31 INT; 138.4 rating

Major: 57.4%; 7.8 YPA; 60 TD; 28 INT; 136.6 rating

They were remarkably similar, almost identical production. But nobody expected anything of Major, and everyone expected Simms to be an all-timer. So, Major was perceived to be the "over-achiever" and Simms the "underachiever." People root for the underdog. But that doesn't mean he was better. 


They were almost identical. Unless it really mattered.

  • Hook 'Em 2
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

23 hours ago, Hozz said:

Never seen that clip, that was great.  Team Applewhite my whole life and it may have changed my mind.  It's hilarious that Simms knows Applewhite's body fat percentage numbers.  And 27 something seems high for a QB.

Never seen that clip either.  From someone that knew them both pretty well everything Chris said is 100% true.  Bet he's wanted to get that off his chest for a long time dealing with all the idiot major cultists.  Fired me up again.  

Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 1/18/2021 at 4:28 PM, Armybrat said:

One thing for sure, Simms probably never resorted to banging a chubby equipment manager. 

And Applewhite never threw 4 interceptions in a half in a conference championship game against a team they beat 41-7 earlier in the season.

  • Hook 'Em 1
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 1/18/2021 at 4:26 PM, UncleSonny said:

Vince-Lane-Colt-Street is the Texas qb Mt. Rushmore. #5 is where the debate starts. 

Simms>Major tho.

#5-7 are pretty easy.  Just the order is in question.

Major, Sam, Peter.

Peter gets on the list if for no other reason than the story of his senior year playing baseball.  Gardere is the only Texas QB to beat OU 4 straight years.  He also played baseball.  OU fans were heckling him in the outfield.  He just quietly held up 4 fingers.  Heckling stopped.

  • Hook 'Em 1
  • Like 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

On 1/18/2021 at 5:14 PM, UncleSonny said:

 

Whoa, who knew. Relatively active too, I guess it's mainly for the olds? No offense to any olds.

Sadly it seems like Longhornfanzone is no longer with us:

image.thumb.png.f7c165a8396c027722c14cd2a3e10042.png

I think Charlie Strong killed it.  Checked in one day and it was gone.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

4 minutes ago, bullet said:

I think Charlie Strong killed it.  Checked in one day and it was gone.

Was thinking BurntOrange Fan Zone.  It was populated by the deadenders from the Longhorn Fan Zone when it went dark.  I discovered it 2-3 months after LHFZ bit the dust.

Wheeler would pop in to BOFZ periodically.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

22 minutes ago, bullet said:

#5-7 are pretty easy.  Just the order is in question.

Major, Sam, Peter.

Peter gets on the list if for no other reason than the story of his senior year playing baseball.  Gardere is the only Texas QB to beat OU 4 straight years.  He also played baseball.  OU fans were heckling him in the outfield.  He just quietly held up 4 fingers.  Heckling stopped.

This James Brown erasure will not stand. 

  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Major was so clutch.....after he put us in a fucking hole. Never understood that love.

Glad to hear Chris loves Texas from that clip. Anyone watching games new major wasn’t well liked and didn’t spend a minute working out. 
 

God our play calling was so frustrating back then. With all that talent, Mack was never ready to unleash it when it mattered most.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

44 minutes ago, TexasEd said:

y no Gardere?

 

Because Mt. Rushmore arbitrarily only has 4 spots I guess. First three are pretty unimpeachable and I think you’d be hard pressed to make an argument for Gardere over Street but I’m open to hear it. 

It’s not like I saw either of them play. First qb I can remember is Shea Morenz. 

Link to comment
Share on other sites

Here's the thing and there's no way around it. Major was a lot more clutch and had a killer instinct the Simms never did. It's not his fault really, he inherited it. There would never have been 20 years of this argument if Simms performed even close to what he was capable of.

Link to comment
Share on other sites

5 minutes ago, DCA_HORN said:

Here's the thing and there's no way around it. Major was a lot more clutch and had a killer instinct the Simms never did. It's not his fault really, he inherited it. There would never have been 20 years of this argument if Simms performed even close to what he was capable of.

Here is the thing: Chris Simms was 0-3 against OU and sucked complete shit all three times. If you want to come here and be QB you don't suck against OU. And if you do suck against OU you better be Vince Young.

  • Hook 'Em 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

1 hour ago, DCA_HORN said:

Here's the thing and there's no way around it. Major was a lot more clutch and had a killer instinct the Simms never did. It's not his fault really, he inherited it. There would never have been 20 years of this argument if Simms performed even close to what he was capable of.

Selective. Fucking. Memory.

  • Hook 'Em 1
  • Like 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.



×
×
  • Create New...