Random thoughts that don't warrant a thread

[CoTex 1,160]

On 4/24/2019 at 4:30 AM, gecko said:

There should airport security lines, separate from TSA Pre-check, for travellers who actually know how to get through a security checkpoint without being a complete dumbs**t

After an especially large clusterfuck at FLL TSA, I saw a man of latin heritage stop, kneel, cross himself and pray.  It took a toll on me too, but I had a good laugh at that poor bastard.  Idiots trying to get through TSA caused him to question his faith.

[El Diablo 4,232]

8 minutes ago, CoTex said:

After an especially large clusterfuck at FLL TSA, I saw a man of latin heritage stop, kneel, cross himself and pray.  It took a toll on me too, but I had a good laugh at that poor bastard.  Idiots trying to get through TSA caused him to question his faith.

Probably had checked bags.

['stache 21,816]

On 4/24/2019 at 4:30 AM, gecko said:

There should airport security lines, separate from TSA Pre-check, for travellers who actually know how to get through a security checkpoint without being a complete dumbs**t

Or, we as a society can stop pretending that taking off our shoes and belts and putting stuff in clear baggies makes any difference whatsoever, and get back to a modicum of sanity checking into an airport.

[Cheeseweasel 26,438]

33 minutes ago, 'stache said:

Or, we as a society can stop pretending that taking off our shoes and belts and putting stuff in clear baggies makes any difference whatsoever, and get back to a modicum of sanity checking into an airport.

TSA has a foot fetish. 

[Guest Lobo]

Nothing at all wrong with Tumi bags, they are very nice.  Just overpriced and not made nearly as well as the price would suggest.  They're at least more practical than a LV bag.  Luggage is gonna get beat up no matter what you do, so even an understated Tumi bag to me makes little sense.  Give me a Brigs & Reilly or Filson.  They look like they came off the bottom rack at OfficeMax/Dick's Sporting Goods, respectively.  But those brands are embarrassingly well made and the interiors are very well thought thru.  

Anyway...

And yeah, when traveling with family---carry on baggage is overrated.  You're gonna move slow into/out of airports anyway, may as well just give up on packing tactically.  

[WhatTheBuck 28,783]

7 hours ago, CoTex said:

After an especially large clusterfuck at FLL TSA, I saw a man of latin heritage stop, kneel, cross himself and pray.  It took a toll on me too, but I had a good laugh at that poor bastard.  Idiots trying to get through TSA caused him to question his faith.

I'm pretty sure kneeling in prayer is the opposite of questioning one's faith. 

[CoTex 1,160]

7 minutes ago, WhatTheBuck said:

I'm pretty sure kneeling in prayer is the opposite of questioning one's faith. 

Thanks for that clarification.  It really added meaning.

[WhatTheBuck 28,783]

7 minutes ago, CoTex said:

Thanks for that clarification.  It really added meaning.

You're welcome. You were obviously confused. It was my pleasure to help you out. 

[After irth 1,243]

8 hours ago, CoTex said:

After an especially large clusterfuck at FLL TSA, I saw a man of latin heritage stop, kneel, cross himself and pray.  It took a toll on me too, but I had a good laugh at that poor bastard.  Idiots trying to get through TSA caused him to question his faith.

Everytime I’ve been in Lauderdale, I have sinned mightily. That dude might have done the same and was offering his penance upon leaving that wonderfully wicked town. 

[Steel Shank 9,426]

Is it possible to train monkeys to remove moss out of oak trees?

[elfenix 34,251]

Mr. Bean isn't funny.

[Walden Ponderer 12,639]

46 minutes ago, elfenix said:

Mr. Bean isn't funny.

True. But Rowan Atkinson was, like the rest of the cast, really good in "Keeping Mum".

[NorthLoop 14,208]

So back to the Lambo story a few pages back..... If Mikey in Swingers had told that bitch he drove a Lambo, could he have fucked her at the party before she ever knew? Been like "haha bitch I drive a Cavalier" 

[CoTex 1,160]

9 hours ago, After irth said:

Everytime I’ve been in Lauderdale, I have sinned mightily. That dude might have done the same and was offering his penance upon leaving that wonderfully wicked town. 

I’ve been rolling to sunny isles and Bal Harbour.  What am I missing?

[HornsOverIthaca 2,333]

Since Roman civilization fell, and Greek civilization fell before than (and so on), does that mean we’re living in a post-apocalyptic civilization..?

[Walden Ponderer 12,639]

5 hours ago, HornsOverIthaca said:

Since Roman civilization fell, and Greek civilization fell before than (and so on), does that mean we’re living in a post-apocalyptic civilization..?

Seems pretty dystopian to me. Of course, I'm living in College Station, so...

[After irth 1,243]

16 hours ago, CoTex said:

I’ve been rolling to sunny isles and Bal Harbour.  What am I missing?

Go slumming at The Rooftop and get back to me. 

(R.I.P Deenie’s Hideaway...)

[deft 6,850]

Since Roman civilization fell, and Greek civilization fell before than (and so on), does that mean we’re living in a post-apocalyptic civilization..?

 

 

Wait – would you rather live in the ascendancy of a civilization or during its decline?

[markstanco 12,577]

I don't get people obsessed with having everything carry-on. Even for short trips I check the bag so I don't have to roll it around the airport and find overhead space. In all my travels I've had a total of two baggage problems, one where my wife's stuff got soaked, but it was partly her fault for having a shitty bag. The second was the bag getting lost but I got it back within hours of the flight. They even brought it straight to my hotel.

Sounds like you don't get in airplanes much if you have only had 2 issues in your life.

[Bullneck 19,100]

There are three threads on On the Field at Hornfans that saw action today.  

Edited April 29, 2019 by Bullneck

[Bullneck 19,100]

The last post on the Football board on Shaggytexas was four days ago.

[Walden Ponderer 12,639]

20 hours ago, deft said:

Wait – would you rather live in the ascendancy of a civilization or during its decline?

There's a shorter wait at the good restaurants during the decline.

[Scheiss Meister 8,408]

2 minutes ago, Walden Ponderer said:

There's a shorter wait at the good restaurants during the decline.

Which is why the wait times are shorter in College Station than Austin.

[Walden Ponderer 12,639]

1 minute ago, Scheiss Meister said:

Which is why the wait times are shorter in College Station than Austin.

We've had 5 showings of our house in the last 36 hours. Here's hoping I get to start waiting in line again soon.

[Cheeseweasel 26,438]

On 4/26/2019 at 10:11 PM, elfenix said:

Mr. Bean isn't funny.

['stache 21,816]

The only thing I know about Game of Thrones is the South Park flopping weiner song. At this point I’d probably go out of my way to hate it to spite the annoying hype.

[Armybrat 40,850]

12 hours ago, Scheiss Meister said:

Which is why the wait times are shorter in College Station than Austin.

Impossible, as Collie Station has never ascended anywhere at any time...... except to pile the shit higher & deeper.

Edited April 29, 2019 by Armybrat

[ABSR 5,315]

On 4/26/2019 at 10:59 PM, Walden Ponderer said:

True. But Rowan Atkinson was, like the rest of the cast, really good in "Keeping Mum".

Agree on Mr. Bean, but his roles as the different Blackadder characters was/is fantastic.   

[Patricio Swayze 17,058]

I wish I wasn’t a strung out nostalgia junkie.

[markstanco 12,577]

I went in to a McDonalds today for coffee. The black lady that was the manager had a knife clipped to her pants. It was red with a Dixie flag on it. I had to do a triple take looking at it.

Still confused 12 hours later.

[Walden Ponderer 12,639]

57 minutes ago, markstanco said:

I went in to a McDonalds today for coffee. The black lady that was the manager had a knife clipped to her pants. It was red with a Dixie flag on it. I had to do a triple take looking at it.

Still confused 12 hours later.

Did she have a "Katfid" namebadge on?

[markstanco 12,577]

[happyfunball 481]

Why / how can a plane land and not have an open gate? It isn’t a surprise that a plane is landing.

This happens far too often.

[Lone Star Horn 2,016]

^^^ It's all scheduling, if the previous flight is late, that throws off the schedule for the incoming plane. The reason there's no gate for the arriving plane is that the gate it's supposed to go to is occupied by a plane that is running late. Their schedules are so close, especially at the busy airports, that there are rarely any open gates for more time than it takes to taxi one plane away from and one plane to the gate.

[Rimbo 25,941]

On 4/26/2019 at 9:42 PM, NorthLoop said:

So back to the Lambo story a few pages back..... If Mikey in Swingers had told that bitch he drove a Lambo, could he have fucked her at the party before she ever knew? Been like "haha bitch I drive a Cavalier" 

See, when I saw that scene, all I was thinking was that the moment she asked that question, I'd have turned away and gone to the next girl.

Like... really? What car do I drive? You're not going to be fucking my car.

[NorthLoop 14,208]

Bitch was ugly anyways

[NWBuck 8,569]

1 hour ago, NorthLoop said:

Bitch was ugly anyways

And that place was dead anyways

[Guest]

Had a dream last night that I went back to where both of my brothers graduated high school and I had attended up to the 7th grade before moving. It was the last week of the regular season in football and since I had only played there in the 7th grade, I miraculously had eligibility left to play against our hated rivals.

I was welcomed like a WWII Medal of Honor winner.  Got suited up.  Coach gave his pregame.  We're about to go out on the field, and I woke up.

 

Good thing i never hit the field.  If the first hit didn't break me in half, I would have been sucking wind so bad, I would have been incapacitated.

Dreams are trippy.

[Prepuce of Doom 21,074]

After completing my first visit to Oklahoma, I am now surprised that the Insane Clown Posse isn't from there. 

[phdhorn 6,224]

I went to school with a Dick Fitzwell.

Man I wish that was my name growing up!

[Cheeseweasel 26,438]

Or John Jacob Jingleheimer Schmidt. 

[luke duke 6,413]

Had a dream last night that I went back to where both of my brothers graduated high school and I had attended up to the 7th grade before moving. It was the last week of the regular season in football and since I had only played there in the 7th grade, I miraculously had eligibility left to play against our hated rivals.
I was welcomed like a WWII Medal of Honor winner.  Got suited up.  Coach gave his pregame.  We're about to go out on the field, and I woke up.
 
Good thing i never hit the field.  If the first hit didn't break me in half, I would have been sucking wind so bad, I would have been incapacitated.
Dreams are trippy.

Sounds a bit aggy.

[markstanco 12,577]

Or uncle rico

[El Diablo 4,232]

23 hours ago, phdhorn said:

I went to school with a Dick Fitzwell.

Man I wish that was my name growing up!

Knew a married couple in North Carolina, last name was Fullenwider, both were large people. First time we met she saved me the trouble and made a joke about it for me. I liked those folks.

[El Diablo 4,232]

1 hour ago, BurntEyes said:

So I'm at a restaurant in UP Michigan.

I asked for Cholula to go with some "Cajun" potatoes.

She was very, very confused.

This brings to mind a random story. A buddy of mine told me that he was in a restaurant and saw a bottle of "Texas Pete" hot sauce on the table and in his mind he was pronouncing it "Texas Peh-tay". He said he'd been reading New Yorker magazine that day and all the high falutin language he'd come across had his wiring all fucked up.

[Guest]

On 5/7/2019 at 6:59 PM, markstanco said:

Or uncle rico

more of The Best of Times, wishing I could play one more game.

Absolutely zero delusion of what my capabilities were/ are...LOLz.

[Rimbo 25,941]

Jesus died that we might eat bacon cheeseburgers.

Come to think of it, the bacon cheeseburger might very well be the greatest evangelistic creation in history.

[Rimbo 25,941]

The Police ran a Sting operation.

[Rimbo 25,941]

Have you ever been too tired to fart? I'm too tired to fart right now.

[Walden Ponderer 12,639]

Why are macarons, macaroons, and macaroni so different?