Random thoughts that don't warrant a thread

[Iceman 2725]

On 9/15/2019 at 10:47 PM, ImissWallyPryor said:

I doubt Abe Lincoln grew wheat, so why did they put wheat on the back of the cent?

Masculine flours?

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

It is very important to be comfortable in your own skin. Seriously. Because in most places, it's illegal to wear someone else's.

[Incredulity 11683]

Quite possibly the funniest clickbait I have ever encountered.

 

Is Morgan Freeman Really Jimi Hendrix?

Snopes.com

 

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share

 

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https://www.snopes.com/fact-check/morgan-freeman-jimi-hendrix/

[Prepuce of Doom 21103]

Earlier today, I saw a coworker go into the men's room with an umbrella. Now, I understand that he was almost certainly just going to go out to lunch in the rain after taking a leak, but I found it very hard to put aside (and stop internally giggling about) the absurd possibility that he was actually planning on pissing all over the place and just didn't want to get any on himself. 

[housious 468]

Nicotine has to be the most useless thing to be hooked on

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

"Sister Christian, you're the only one.......
 

 

 

 

....you make bath-time lots of fun."

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

[WhatTheBuck 28798]

1 hour ago, housious said:

Nicotine has to be the most useless thing to be hooked on

What is the most useful thing to be hooked on?

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

7 minutes ago, WhatTheBuck said:

What is the most useful thing to be hooked on?

Porn.

[housious 468]

1 hour ago, WhatTheBuck said:

What is the most useful thing to be hooked on?

A bull red 

[NeverMarryAStripper 21921]

What is the most useful thing to be hooked on?

Phonics

[HRSchenker 2273]

I'm seriously thinking about getting rid of all my social media accounts. What's the point of having these friends and followers if 10% or less see your content? Or care enough to click like? 

[Wally Fairway 5586]

Getting ready to game day at the stadium, had to take the dogs for their morning walk a little earlier than normal.

One of them got sprayed by a skunk, so I'm dealing with that now. Just finished the first soaking either the peroxide/baking soda/dish soap....waiting to rinse it off.

5am & today already sucks

[housious 468]

6 hours ago, HRSchenker said:

I'm seriously thinking about getting rid of all my social media accounts. What's the point of having these friends and followers if 10% or less see your content? Or care enough to click like? 

It’s not content. It’s you.

[HRSchenker 2273]

22 minutes ago, housious said:

It’s not content. It’s you.

Probably so. 

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

I was walking past a corner booth at the farmer's market today, where there was nobody around but a juvenile delinquent, tending his family's wares, and a sign out front that read:  "Duck, eggs." And I thought, "That's really pretty irritating, putting in a superfluous comma like that." 

And then, it hit me.

[NeverMarryAStripper 21921]

I just now realized that it is Downton Abbey and not Downtown Abbey

[Steel Shank 9432]

I'm sure it's already been brought up, but when the fuck did they start spelling Kiev Kyiv?

[DaysOff 7974]

I just now realized that it is Downton Abbey and not Downtown Abbey

Figured it out quicker than my wife.

[F250 28818]

Today I was contemplating whether I like titties or ass more than thought that as a man over 40 years old I should have figured this out already.

[Wild Bill 324]

On 9/29/2019 at 11:12 PM, NeverMarryAStripper said:

I just now realized that it is Downton Abbey and not Downtown Abbey

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

52 minutes ago, F250 said:

Today I was contemplating whether I like titties or ass more than thought that as a man over 40 years old I should have figured this out already.

This is one of those rare questions in which the correct answer depends on which of the choices you happen to be confronted with at the particular moment.

[F250 28818]

25 minutes ago, Walden Ponderer said:

This is one of those rare questions in which the correct answer depends on which of the choices you happen to be confronted with at the particular moment.

[RollLeft 5045]

1 hour ago, F250 said:

Today I was contemplating whether I like titties or ass more than thought that as a man over 40 years old I should have figured this out already.

I found my answer when i realized i have more flexibility if a girl has smaller boobs, but i cannot handle a small/flat bottom.  So ass for me. 

[After irth 1244]

7 hours ago, F250 said:

Today I was contemplating whether I like titties or ass more than thought that as a man over 40 years old I should have figured this out already.

Why not both?

[chikin23 384]

Can't go wrong.

[Rougarou 594]

I've lived my whole life thinking that "Mrs.", to denote a married woman, was pronounced "Miss" and that "Ms." denoting a single woman, was pronounced "Miz-us"

Apparently it's the opposite.

[WhatTheBuck 28798]

2 hours ago, Rougarou said:

I've lived my whole life thinking that "Mrs.", to denote a married woman, was pronounced "Miss" and that "Ms." denoting a single woman, was pronounced "Miz-us"

Apparently it's the opposite.

It's not even that. 

[Guest Lobo]

That time of year (almost) when I find myself looking at signage or print or ads or whatnot that say, "Yoga/Pilates" and all I see is "Yoga/Pants"  

Golden age of ass gentlemen, a golden age. 

[Rougarou 594]

46 minutes ago, WhatTheBuck said:

It's not even that. 

What is it!? I have to know!

 

[WhatTheBuck 28798]

3 minutes ago, Rougarou said:

What is it!? I have to know!

Mrs. is pronounced missus (sounds like "misses").

Ms. is pronounced mizz. 

Miss is pronounced miss. 

[El Diablo 4232]

 

[baboso 6057]

Great tune.

[DaysOff 7974]

Mrs. is pronounced missus (sounds like "misses").
Ms. is pronounced mizz. 
Miss is pronounced miss. 

All of us childrens from the 70s and 80s that had the single women's lib teachers, " it's mizzzzzzz".

[Buffsoldier 1895]

36 minutes ago, DaysOff said:

1 hour ago, WhatTheBuck said:

Mrs. is pronounced missus (sounds like "misses").
Ms. is pronounced mizz. 
Miss is pronounced miss. 

All of us childrens from the 70s and 80s that had the single women's lib teachers, " it's mizzzzzzz".

[After irth 1244]

My new house is twice the size of the old one. I get a helluva lot more exercise just trying to find my fuckin’ coffee cup. 

Every damn day.....

[Rimbo 26109]

when in public, walk backwards.

beep as you go.

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

On 10/2/2019 at 2:32 PM, DaysOff said:

On 10/2/2019 at 1:44 PM, WhatTheBuck said:

Mrs. is pronounced missus (sounds like "misses").
Ms. is pronounced mizz. 
Miss is pronounced miss. 

All of us childrens from the 70s and 80s that had the single women's lib teachers, " it's mizzzzzzz".

To be fair, it was also a simplifier for politeness sake. You don't know whether a woman is married or not? You call her "Ms." That way, she can yell at you for not calling her "Dr." because you're supposed to be psychic and know that she has a fucking PhD. Sexist pig.

[Moby Ric 2058]

On 10/4/2019 at 10:12 AM, After irth said:

My new house is twice the size of the old one. I get a helluva lot more exercise just trying to find my fuckin’ coffee cup. 

Every damn day.....

I have that same problem.  It is a scavenger hunt when I can't find my glasses.  First world problem all over the place over here.

[Underdog 28773]

On 10/4/2019 at 11:12 AM, After irth said:

My new house is twice the size of the old one. I get a helluva lot more exercise just trying to find my fuckin’ coffee cup. 

Every damn day.....

From a single wide to a double wide...  congrats.

[Rimbo 26109]

Whenever you use a towel at someone else's house's bathroom, there is a non-zero chance you're putting your hands where someone else's ballsack has been.

[Kennythetiger 9460]

You’re lucky if that’s all I put on it. 

[Prepuce of Doom 21103]

1 hour ago, Rimbo said:

Whenever you use a towel at someone else's house's bathroom, there is a non-zero chance you're putting your hands where someone else's ballsack has been.

How do you feel about shaking hands? 

[Rimbo 26109]

3 minutes ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

How do you feel about shaking hands? 

you're overthinking this

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

The greatest ironic tragedy in the culinary world is this:

Beef would taste incredible if done tandoori style.

[PatrickMcHorn 376]

The greatest ironic tragedy in the culinary world is this:
Beef would taste incredible if done tandoori style.

I have this thought everytime I go to the whip-in for their lunch buffet.

[Walden Ponderer 12639]

"Take out"...

Could be one of three things:
1) Food
2) Dating
3) Assassination

[Buffsoldier 1895]

4 hours ago, Walden Ponderer said:

"Take out"...

Could be one of three things:
1) Food
2) Dating
3) Assassination

4) Trash

[Guest Lobo]

On 10/12/2019 at 6:20 PM, Rimbo said:

Whenever you use a towel at someone else's house's bathroom, there is a non-zero chance you're putting your hands where someone else's ballsack has been.

What do you think happens when you use a hotel towel, remote control, or even the desk chair.  

[elfenix 34332]

let he who hasn't jerked off naked in a hotel chair throw the first stone

[Buffsoldier 1895]

44 minutes ago, elfenix said:

let he who hasn't jerked off naked in a hotel chair throw the first stone