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GSU&UT

By GSU&UT
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ajax
ajax

Last night I was having a dream where I was having sexy time with some random cute girl. And then out of nowhere the cute girl says, " let me try this" and then proceeds to stick her whole hand down h

Sbbruin
Sbbruin

Bullshit.  It's a dick move to knowingly jump in the express line with more items than allowed.  People get in that line to move quick.  It is their business if you fuck that up.

Richard Kimball
Richard Kimball

True story about Dolly Parton:  I think it was 1975, and she had just gone solo as an artist after being with Porter Wagoner. She had a concert scheduled for the Heart O' Texas Colosseum in Waco.

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Walden Ponderer

Walden Ponderer 12639

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The most immoral person I've ever known was a paramedic. He was really good at his job, too. On the clock, who knows how many people's lives he has saved over the years.

Off the clock? Who knows how many people's lives he's ruined.

I think about that from time to time. Judging people -- even if you're a really good judge of character -- is a total crapshoot.

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StruggleBus

StruggleBus 3922

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On 5/23/2020 at 10:19 AM, futureman said:

if lawyers are “juris doctors” then why don’t you call them “dr. so-and-so” when addressing them?

Lawyers are already annoying enough. Can you imagine them marching around demanding that everyone address them as "doctor" as well?

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Walden Ponderer

Walden Ponderer 12639

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On 5/15/2020 at 11:17 PM, bernorange said:

It was big news around December 2016 when the Shariah Standard on Gold was announced so Muslims could start investing in gold investment vehicles.

It's kinda funny, for a group that is as touchy about literal interpretations as any good ol' small town brick building Church of Christ, but they allow "interpretations" to be passed down with the "weight of hadith". I forget what these scholarly findings are actually labeled, but most Muslims in America, the moderates who run your corner convenience stores, the engineers who work for the construction companies that put up the oddly uniform buildings in strip malls, etc.) all listen to this one group of imams in Canada who say, "Yeah, pretty much do whatever the Americans do, just try to do it with a Muslim banker". Which sounds sort of like what the administration at Baylor tells their teenage kids about drinking, when you think about it.

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Iceman

Iceman 2694

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1PM yesterday, order flowers online for a friend's mom's funeral.  Brownfield, Texas

10PM last night, order processed/ built in Arlington, Texas and loaded on UPS

5AM this morning arrives at Lubbock, loaded on delivery vehicle.

 

 

What in the actual fuck?  Doing it that way is more cost effective than contracting with the florist down the street from the funeral home?  I mean, i got a very competitive price because of a corp discount.  I don't see how they make any money/ realistic profit on that...

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CooterBrown

CooterBrown 18004

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Posted
why does organic milk last so much longer than regular milk?  seems counterintuitive. 

It’s not that it’s organic it’s that it’s UHT (ultra high temp) pasteurized milk. UHT has a shelf life of like 60 days while regular cheap ass pasteurized milk has a shelf life of a week.
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futureman

futureman 22444

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Posted

I wish I weren’t so good in bed.  seriously.  I don’t even bang that many chicks but the ones I do just get addicted to my dick because I fuck them like they’ve never been fucked before in their life.  and I’m a nice guy so I hate breaking their heart but I haven’t found one I’m ready to settle down with yet.  it’s a rough life I lead. 

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El Diablo

El Diablo 4232

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4 hours ago, CooterBrown said:


It’s not that it’s organic it’s that it’s UHT (ultra high temp) pasteurized milk. UHT has a shelf life of like 60 days while regular cheap ass pasteurized milk has a shelf life of a week.

When I was onboard ships in the Med we'd get this Parmalat milk. Kept it stored at room temp. No telling how old it was. Tasted like the cardboard carton it was in. Turrble.

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Cheeseweasel

Cheeseweasel 26438

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Posted
1 minute ago, futureman said:

I wish I weren’t so good in bed.  seriously.  I don’t even bang that many chicks but the ones I do just get addicted to my dick because I fuck them like they’ve never been fucked before in their life.  and I’m a nice guy so I hate breaking their heart but I haven’t found one I’m ready to settle down with yet.  it’s a rough life I lead. 

Chicks dig me because I rarely wear underwear, and when I do, it's usually something unusual.

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Incredulity

Incredulity 11655

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Posted (edited)

Irene Triplett, the last person receiving a pension from the U.S. Civil War, has died at the age of 90.

Ms. Triplett’s father, Mose Triplett, started fighting in the war for the Confederacy, but defected to the North in 1863. That decision earned his daughter Irene, the product of a late-in-life marriage to a woman almost 50 years his junior, a pension of $73.13 a month from the Department of Veterans Affairs.

Ms....

 

From WSJ, its paywalled, but I just wanted to provide source.

https://www.wsj.com/articles/last-person-to-receive-a-civil-war-era-pension-dies-11591141193?mod=trending_now_2

Edited by Incredulity
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After irth

After irth 1243

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, futureman said:

I wish I weren’t so good in bed.  seriously.  I don’t even bang that many chicks but the ones I do just get addicted to my dick because I fuck them like they’ve never been fucked before in their life.  and I’m a nice guy so I hate breaking their heart but I haven’t found one I’m ready to settle down with yet.  it’s a rough life I lead. 

It is amazing to me the amount of women that have never been properly fucked.  I feel fortunate to have been able to provide such a service.

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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

Posted
Posted

I like that you two are having this conversation right below a post about the last surviving Civil War pensioner.  

That Irene Triplett was one fine piece of ass, and I speak from experience.  

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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

Posted
Posted
1 minute ago, After irth said:

Did you leave her satisfied?

i have her a little bedroom move I like to call "The Appomattox Courthouse."  It's all hot and heavy at first, and then next thing you know her southern region is surrendering to my every command.    It's really just mostly anal.  

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Iceman

Iceman 2694

Posted
Posted (edited)
9 hours ago, futureman said:

someone explain the heb prices on half-and-half and heavy cream.  

half and half:

pint = $0.90

quart = $0.98

1/2 gallon = $3

 

cream:

8oz = $0.90

pint = $0.98

quart = $3

 

why?

1) People suck at math.

2) they may be comping their competition on the smaller sizes, i.e. their normal price on the quart of half&half or pint of cream should be about $1.62, but 3 stores in the area are selling it for $1.  HEB does that shit all the time and the consumer wins.

Edited by Iceman
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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

Posted
Posted

That is such an underrated movie, and very loosely based on a semi-true story.  That film spawned the careers of a half dozen great actors.  I wish they showed it more on cable.

It's the second most influential reason I almost attended I.U.  And yeah, it's actually chartered as "the Indiana University", not some dyslexic bullshit like "OU" which is really the University of Oklahoma on paper, but their illiterate asses got it backwards. 

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Steamboat1874

Steamboat1874 4050

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Posted
23 hours ago, markstanco said:

Rotator cuff surgury this past Tuesday at 7a.

I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy. Some real pain associated with it, it is tough to sleep.

Man I had that surgery a few years ago and you are right.

I remember being fine going to the car and getting home and then the morphine wore off.

Holy shit I was in pain. Thank god for vicodin.

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Pancho

Pancho 44713

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Posted

I just do not understand the people who have large American flags hanging out the back of their truck beds or motorcycles.  I’m not sure what the point they are trying to make is.  For the trucks, it’s never a Ford Ranger.  Nooooooo it’s always a raised truck that looks like the driver is trying to overcompensate for something. 

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Cheeseweasel

Cheeseweasel 26438

Posted
Posted
23 minutes ago, Pancho said:

I just do not understand the people who have large American flags hanging out the back of their truck beds or motorcycles.  I’m not sure what the point they are trying to make is.  For the trucks, it’s never a Ford Ranger.  Nooooooo it’s always a raised truck that looks like the driver is trying to overcompensate for something. 

It's the Young Redneck Male equivalent of driving around blasting rap music. LOOK AT ME LOOK AT ME LOOK AT ME.

Definitely overcompensating. 

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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

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Posted

On Sunday, at the suggestion of my Navy veteran uncle (a dozen others in my family were as well, but most are dead now)...I will be hanging up the American Flag for Flag Day.  And I will be hanging it upside down according to 4 U.S. Code, Section 8 which allows for that in times of civic distress.  On Father's Day, I will hang the flag in the traditional manner out of respect for my late father and grandfather's service to the nation in the United States Navy.  On Independence Day, I will hang the flag in the traditional manner because no matter what's happening right now, we were a rebellion against an oppressive regime and we won.  

But Flag Day, my Flag goes upside down because of the rotting distress in my nation.  You have an issue with that, my daughters could use a good look at a real life coward so they know who to to avoid later in life.  So send a PM my way and know I'm protected by U.S. Code, you're protected only by your impotence and handgun collection. 

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