Random thoughts that don't warrant a thread

[Underdog 28742]

Bet if you had said you like that channel also, you’d have to beat them off you with a stick.  
 

Why couldn’t they have left Michael Strahan  in space?  Tired of seeing that motherfucker all over the place. 

[NeverMarryAStripper 21909]

Beating yourself off with a stick doesn’t sound very pleasurable 

[Superhero 8830]

Got a credit card fraud alert on my phone this morning. Someone bought 2 inflatable kayaks to ship to NC.

I don't remember saving my CC number on the Walmart site. My fault for 1) shopping at Walmart; 2) keeping my CC number or record; 3) using a simple password.

[ztejas 43503]

On 12/10/2021 at 7:44 PM, OneOfTheOutOfFocusGuys said:

Amusing use of a few minutes of your time is to watch a baby 19 year old George Foreman throw absolute haymakers for an entire fight and turn some commie into hamburger in the gold medal round. 
 

 

Hard to get that on the scout team in the USSR. 

18 hours ago, Underdog said:

Didn’t realize Tito’s vodka was so widely available/distributed, saw this display at a random gas station/convenience store in Vermont… 

They had Deep Eddy vodka as well. 

It's one of if not the most popular vodka in the US. Tito is worth a cool 8B.

[Underdog 28742]

Good for them.  I’m not much of a drinker, although vodka is one of those vices,  so don’t pay much attention to that stuff, just recognized the name.  

[Cheeseweasel 26438]

On 12/12/2021 at 8:23 AM, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Beating yourself off with a stick doesn’t sound very pleasurable 

Don't kinksham him.

[Longhornstampede 3184]

Waking up because of insomnia at 2:30 am and catching up on Lulz threads and WWF games while having a vodka and cranberry juice has become one of my guilty pleasures lately. Then I can go back to sleep.

[Underdog 28742]

On 12/10/2021 at 8:44 PM, OneOfTheOutOfFocusGuys said:

Amusing use of a few minutes of your time is to watch a baby 19 year old George Foreman throw absolute haymakers for an entire fight and turn some commie into hamburger in the gold medal round. 
 

 

A Foreman / Teofilo Stevenson bout in the Olympics would’ve been epic, alas George was 4 years too early.  Anyone else remember Stevenson?  Dude was a beast in the Olympic Games. 

[Nolacycling 893]

The 12 Days of Xmas was actually celebrated as the 12 days following Xmas. Co-worker said "What religion is THAT?"

[Gatorubet 30261]

Well fuck you as well.

FIFY

[Cheeseweasel 26438]

12 hours ago, Nolacycling said:

The 12 Days of Xmas was actually celebrated as the 12 days following Xmas. Co-worker said "What religion is THAT?"

Bob and Doug addressed this on their album. 

 

[tbone_ 14132]

Ok wtf I just listed to that last night. And this

Did not know that was Rick Moranis though.

[Cheeseweasel 26438]

14 minutes ago, tbone_ said:

Did not know that was Rick Moranis though.

Take off.

[Crapinon 2257]

14 hours ago, Underdog said:

A Foreman / Teofilo Stevenson bout in the Olympics would’ve been epic, alas George was 4 years too early.  Anyone else remember Stevenson?  Dude was a beast in the Olympic Games. 

Yeah he was but I think it had a lot to do with the fact that he never went pro and continued to box as an amateur because of Castro's Cuba. He was a 26 year old amateur when he won his 2nd gold medal in '76. He refused to fight Ali saying it was more important to Cuba to be a national hero. I think a prime Ali, Foreman. Frazier, Norton and probably a few other would have massacred him in a pro bout lasting more than 3 rounds.  

[Patricio Swayze 17058]

I don’t give a flying fuck about the NFL, but sometimes I’ll put it on as background noise. I have the Sunday night game on and see some promo with Snoop dressed as Santa. But his Santa suit is blue. I know he was a crip, nice to see him keeping it real.

[Longboard Horn 40383]

How come there's Batman shampoo but no conditioner Gordon?

[closetohumping 17453]

Forgot why I was here

[ButtFumble 5180]

On 12/10/2021 at 5:14 PM, Lobo said:

Funny you mention that.  I was driving behind this kinda lower-end strip center in NE Austin.  It's not crappy by any means, was built as kind of mid-B product and is aging poorly with lots of empty stores.  Anyway, was gonna toss out some trash I had in the truck in the dumpsters behind.  Nothing major, just a plastic bag of some crap accrued in my vehicle all week long.  I go back there, there's not 1 but 2 Tesla's (including one of those Model X ones with the gull-wings), and they're both doing the same shit.  It was just so bizarre to me.  Do they live around there?  It's not a Tesla-esque neighborhood?  Did they drive from far away just to dump this shit?  Do they have enough power to get back to their contemporary mini-homes?  How did they pack all that fucking trash in that little trunk?  Do they not have to recycle because they have the electric car? 

What a fascinating little town we still have.

come on man you know the answer

they are too ashamed to let their neighbors see them throwing anything away and not recycling it or repurposing it

[atomheartbevo 89737]

I have a buddy who has a diecast collecting website, and he had me do some work on pulling a shit-ton of data off of a related Japanese site that he has an agreement/affiliation with and importing it into his. They've provided me with copies of their stuff, but it's obviously all in Japanese, so I'm dicking around with the best and freest way to translate it, or just stripping out a lot of stuff and going with barebones information.

Always, this has led me to spending a lot of time on their site, and I made the mistake of going down the rabbit hole and checking out other Japanese collector sites they link to, and holy fuck do those people love Snoopy, as in Charles Schulz, Peanuts, etc.

I mean, really love Snoopy, like you can buy Snoopy-branded ramen, and Snoopy-branded tomato soup, and all kinds of Snoopy-branded clothing, toys, etc.  And they have a shit-ton of Charles Schulz's sayings translated into Japanese. Probably everything he has said or written down.  You can buy doll houses and then buy Snoopy-related room sets for every room of those houses, etc. so that you have a doll house of nothing but Snoopy stuff.

It's just.....fascinating.  They have so many cartoon and anime characters of their own creation, but damn do they love Snoopy and the gang.

[Superhero 8830]

You ain’t seen nothing ‘til you see Hello Kitty waffle irons and Hello Kitty toilet paper. 

[Cheeseweasel 26438]

35 minutes ago, Superhero said:

You ain’t seen nothing ‘til you see Hello Kitty waffle irons and Hello Kitty toilet paper. 

Show us your pics.

[closetohumping 17453]

Love Fritos. Love chili but frito pie in a bag doesn’t work.  I’d just prefer to put chili in a bowl and top it with cheese and the Fritos 

[Superhero 8830]

Wear a god damn helmet if you ski or snowboard. I took a tumble this afternoon and smacked the back of my head pretty hard against the snow. I came up a little dazed, but without it, I would be in a hospital somewhere getting a CT scan. 

[Superhero 8830]

On 12/21/2021 at 11:54 AM, Cheeseweasel said:

Show us your pics.

 

[closetohumping 17453]

Sometimes I think drivers making a turn at 3 mph are messing with me

[closetohumping 17453]

Dp 

Edited December 23, 2021 by closetohumping

[Prepuce of Doom 21091]

I'm pretty sure that nobody with an IQ over 110 has ever purchased a bottle of Conor McGregor's Proper No. Twelve whiskey. 

[Rockwell Torrey 1293]

30 minutes ago, Prepuce of Doom said:

I'm pretty sure that nobody with an IQ over 110 has ever purchased a bottle of Conor McGregor's Proper No. Twelve whiskey. 

Jose Cuervo bought it for $600 million. 

[Helobious 9463]

Texas, Louisiana, Florida, California. The heaviest NFL talent producers, all filled entirely with dogshit college teams this year. I don’t get it. Texas easily fared the best out of the bunch.

[Underdog 28742]

On 12/23/2021 at 1:01 AM, Superhero said:

Wear a god damn helmet if you ski or snowboard. I took a tumble this afternoon and smacked the back of my head pretty hard against the snow. I came up a little dazed, but without it, I would be in a hospital somewhere getting a CT scan. 

Snowflake. 

[Rimbo 25993]

I just woke up from the strangest, vivid dream.

A dream in which the Universe made it extremely clear that I was extremely important. That I had been born to be, and I quote, "The Ultimate War Machine." And I was, in fact, Vince Neil of Motley Crue, early in their breakthrough to stardom. "No wonder they hate me later," I said.

wtf, brain?

seriously, what if someone had been born to be the ultimate warrior, but he became the lead singer of a successful hair metal band instead? And was, in fact, Vince Neil?

what the hell does this mean?

i mean, beside the fact that I should drink less before bed

Edited December 24, 2021 by Rimbo

[mchookem 16338]

Leonardo DiCaprio's upcoming films include him playing:

Ernest Burkhart 

Theodore Roosevelt 

Joe Petrosino

HH Holmes

Jim Jones

Leonardo Davinci 

Ulysses S Grant

i bet he has another Oscar within 5 years.

 

[Guest Lobo]

Which adapation/version/screenplay of Jim Jones is he set to play?  

"The Road to Jonestown" by Jeff Guinn is my hope.  

[tbone_ 14132]

I saw Aerosmith in concert a couple years ago. They were definitely a rock band.

[mchookem 16338]

16 minutes ago, Lobo said:

Which adapation/version/screenplay of Jim Jones is he set to play?  

"The Road to Jonestown" by Jeff Guinn is my hope.  

looks like Scott Rosenberg is the writer.

https://deadline.com/2021/11/leonardo-dicaprio-jim-jones-mgm-jonestown-1234869994/

[Guest Lobo]

I know they're more basketball schools than football schools, but for as big as their state population is...

you never hear about the rivalries between University of New York and New York State.  

Though not quite as large, but still our nation's 10th largest, you never hear about the rivalries of University of New Jersey and New Jersey State.  

[Scheiss Meister 8408]

Who looked at bologna and thought, "Putting olives in that would fucking rock!"?  And who buys enough olive loaf that they keep making it? 

[closetohumping 17453]

I wonder how long save and busters will stay open?    I’ve been to several within the last year and none are busy

[Brothahorn 10087]

Who looked at bologna and thought, "Putting olives in that would fucking rock!"?  And who buys enough olive loaf that they keep making it? 

Same idiots who made pickle loaf. My mom is the only fool I know who eats that shit.

[Rimbo 25993]

On 12/12/2021 at 8:23 AM, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Beating yourself off with a stick doesn’t sound very pleasurable 

Not with that attitude it's not.

[Richard Kimball 1496]

If you ever work in an emergency room, there are things you should know. 

Nobody ever accidentally sticks something up their ass, but you need to work on saying, "Damn, that's crazy!" If the object they "accidentally" got stuck in their ass is a cell phone, you don't have to ask. It was on vibrate. 

The only thing in the world that smells worse than an obese woman's vagina is a wino's feet. NOTHING in the world smells worse than a wino's feet, and that's coming from a guy who spent five years on a dive/recovery team. 

One shift in an ER and your back and feet will hurt worse than eight hours of ditch digging. 

ER break rooms have changed a LOT in the last forty years. In the 1980s, everyone ran on nicotine and caffeine. The break rooms had an ash tray the size of a sombrero, and looked like a camp fire had just gone out in it. There were at least six 44 ounce styrofoam Big Gulp cups filled with Circle K coffee. 

[Guest Lobo]

What is it about the wino's feet that make 'em stink so bad?  Yes, literally my morbid curiosity.  

[NeverMarryAStripper 21909]

I want to know how often you have to smell an obese woman's vagina when you work in an ER 

[SurlyGator 866]

No, I promise, you don’t. Besides, wouldn’t one time be one time too many?

[HouTex 1887]

1 hour ago, Richard Kimball said:

If you ever work in an emergency room, there are things you should know. 

Nobody ever accidentally sticks something up their ass, but you need to work on saying, "Damn, that's crazy!" If the object they "accidentally" got stuck in their ass is a cell phone, you don't have to ask. It was on vibrate. 

The only thing in the world that smells worse than an obese woman's vagina is a wino's feet. NOTHING in the world smells worse than a wino's feet, and that's coming from a guy who spent five years on a dive/recovery team. 

One shift in an ER and your back and feet will hurt worse than eight hours of ditch digging. 

ER break rooms have changed a LOT in the last forty years. In the 1980s, everyone ran on nicotine and caffeine. The break rooms had an ash tray the size of a sombrero, and looked like a camp fire had just gone out in it. There were at least six 44 ounce styrofoam Big Gulp cups filled with Circle K coffee. 

I had a fraternity brother in the early 80’s who was premed.  He worked part time at what was then Brackenridge Hospital.  He said you couldn’t imagine what some guys would stick up their asses.  Lots of coke bottles and live animals.  

[TKthunder2 4992]

1 hour ago, Richard Kimball said:

If you ever work in an emergency room, there are things you should know. 

Nobody ever accidentally sticks something up their ass, but you need to work on saying, "Damn, that's crazy!" If the object they "accidentally" got stuck in their ass is a cell phone, you don't have to ask. It was on vibrate.

[ROFL BOX 6649]

3 hours ago, Richard Kimball said:

The only thing in the world that smells worse than an obese woman's vagina is a wino's feet. NOTHING in the world smells worse than a wino's feet, and that's coming from a guy who spent five years on a dive/recovery team.

I'm certain you have, but I'll go ahead & ask it anyway...

Ever burp the colostomy bag for an obese woman who smokes 3 packs a day?

[Richard Kimball 1496]

10 hours ago, Lobo said:

What is it about the wino's feet that make 'em stink so bad?  Yes, literally my morbid curiosity.  

Some of them never take their shoes off. The foot calluses sometimes literally grow into the socks. They hit an ER and take their shoes off for the first time in a month or two and you can smell it all the way down the hall. 

[Richard Kimball 1496]

10 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

I want to know how often you have to smell an obese woman's vagina when you work in an ER 

Just once for me. Had to hold it open so a doctor could insert a tube. Cottage cheese. It was awful. 

7 hours ago, ROFL BOX said:

I'm certain you have, but I'll go ahead & ask it anyway...

Ever burp the colostomy bag for an obese woman who smokes 3 packs a day?

No, and I'll pass on that one. 

[Superhero 8830]

I usually go to bed earlier than my wife. I start by sleeping on her side of the bed so it’s warm when she comes to bed. I’ve been doing this for several years now. I know it sounds stupid but she really appreciates it and will occasionally toss some lovin’ my way as an appreciation.