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GSU&UT

By GSU&UT
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Last night I was having a dream where I was having sexy time with some random cute girl. And then out of nowhere the cute girl says, " let me try this" and then proceeds to stick her whole hand down h

Sbbruin
Sbbruin

Bullshit.  It's a dick move to knowingly jump in the express line with more items than allowed.  People get in that line to move quick.  It is their business if you fuck that up.

Richard Kimball
Richard Kimball

True story about Dolly Parton:  I think it was 1975, and she had just gone solo as an artist after being with Porter Wagoner. She had a concert scheduled for the Heart O' Texas Colosseum in Waco.

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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

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Shit man, sorry to hear that.  If you wanna talk about it here, happy to listen.  Certainly understand if you don't.  Here's to the day getting better for all of us...

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SKJ

SKJ 1311

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19 minutes ago, Lobo said:

Shit man, sorry to hear that.  If you wanna talk about it here, happy to listen.  Certainly understand if you don't.  Here's to the day getting better for all of us...

Ah, it was just a dream.  So real that I was trying to remember what parts were true and what parts weren't.  

I dint really get that a lot so at least there's that.  It's one of the byproducts of a very strange life. 

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Chooky

Chooky 13319

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On 3/11/2022 at 10:07 AM, Dbeasy said:

I’m so annoyed by the catch phrases that pop up randomly from time to time. I see that “virtue signaling” is now edging out “chef’s kiss” for the most annoying term. 

"Narrative" is way overused right now. 

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markstanco

markstanco 12627

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It seems like some company could come up with a unit that would wash all your clothes (your choice of whites or delicates or soiled kids stuff or whatever) and then go in to a dry mode. Just one unit. Throw your jeans and underwear and darks in and after 2ish hours they are ready to fold.

Seems like they would crush. Half the space in the laundry room. Sell the units for twice as much as a washer and dryer.

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TKthunder2

TKthunder2 4997

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, markstanco said:

It seems like some company could come up with a unit that would wash all your clothes (your choice of whites or delicates or soiled kids stuff or whatever) and then go in to a dry mode. Just one unit. Throw your jeans and underwear and darks in and after 2ish hours they are ready to fold.

Seems like they would crush. Half the space in the laundry room. Sell the units for twice as much as a washer and dryer.

They do sell those.  They just aren’t that popular.

https://www.bestbuy.com/site/washers-dryers/washer-dryer-combos/pcmcat245000050019.c?id=pcmcat245000050019

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NeverMarryAStripper

NeverMarryAStripper 21943

Posted
Posted
3 hours ago, markstanco said:

It seems like some company could come up with a unit that would wash all your clothes (your choice of whites or delicates or soiled kids stuff or whatever) and then go in to a dry mode. Just one unit. Throw your jeans and underwear and darks in and after 2ish hours they are ready to fold.

Seems like they would crush. Half the space in the laundry room. Sell the units for twice as much as a washer and dryer.

Been around a long time

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Guest

Guest

Posted
Posted
17 hours ago, markstanco said:

It seems like some company could come up with a unit that would wash all your clothes (your choice of whites or delicates or soiled kids stuff or whatever) and then go in to a dry mode. Just one unit. Throw your jeans and underwear and darks in and after 2ish hours they are ready to fold.

Seems like they would crush. Half the space in the laundry room. Sell the units for twice as much as a washer and dryer.

Had one in a furnished apartment. I went to the laundromat it was so bad. Would take hours and stuff still wouldn't be dry. 

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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

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5 minutes ago, closetohumping said:

Why can’t cars have gas tanks on both sides?

Because of the arrow on your dashboard.  And because you touch yourself at night.  On both sides, I might add.

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Cheeseweasel

Cheeseweasel 26438

Posted
Posted
3 hours ago, Longhornstampede said:

Why can't car companies install a belt driven alternator/generator that recharges the batteries while it's running?

Im sure someone smarter than me knows that answer by now.

I know we are giving you shit, but is this a serious question? We have a dumb question thread. I suggest using it if you're serious and don't want to get ridiculed. 

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HRSchenker

HRSchenker 2274

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Dealing with the general public sucks. I thought it was bad in health care but apparently it's also terrible in the tire business. Got a flat tire on my lunch break and drive to Discount Tire for a fix (tire warranty and the only place willing to operate on my Tesla). I'm chilling in the lobby and this happens as someone walks in 

Employee: Hey welcome to Discount Tire, how can I help you? 

Customer:.........excuse me? 

Employee: How can I help you? 

Customer: 1:30pm 

Employee: Okay. Do you have an appointment with us for 1:30pm? 

Customer: That's what I just said. I'm early and want service now. You're not busy at all. 

What the fuck is wrong with people? 

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Guest

Guest

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Posted

1. Anyone that orders from DoorDash, UberEats, etc. should never be allowed to say a word about inflation.

2. Who is ordering from these things? The prices seem outrageous and most food has a very limited shelf life. Someone ordering fast food? What? Who wants room temperature soggy fries?

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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

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People that don't enjoy sitting in drive-thru lines.  I think eventually, franchise owners of chain restaurants will realize their biggest waste of money is real estate if you're not slinging booze.  Just build out and lease a Wendy's kitchen outside of town at $20/foot instead of $40/foot, let delivery services come to you and deliver that shit to the customer directly who doesn't really need "the in-person Wendy's experience."  Whatever the fuck that is.  Ever since they got rid of the newspapers on the table, fuck 'em.

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WhatTheBuck

WhatTheBuck 28805

Posted
Posted
11 hours ago, Moby Ric said:

The Oh no song by Kreepa or whoever the fuck it is makes me want to drown a bag of Kittens.

Oh No by Frank Zappa is a great song in all its permutations both lyrical and instrumental. I’ll post one of each. (And spare you a much longer dissertation about the song, the suites it appears in, and the general evolution of the music therein.)

 

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Patricio Swayze

Patricio Swayze 17058

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Posted (edited)

I started dating my wife in 2006.  Started living together in 2009.  Married in 2011.  Kitchen towels are not my responsibility.  There are two towels hanging above the kitchen sink.  I still have no fucking clue what the difference and role of each towel is.

Edited by Patricio Swayze
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Crapinon

Crapinon 2276

Posted
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7 hours ago, Patricio Swayze said:

I started dating my wife in 2006.  Started living together in 2009.  Married in 2011.  Kitchen towels are not my responsibility.  There are two towels hanging above the kitchen sink.  I still have no fucking clue what the difference and role of each towel is.

It doesn't matter. Don't touch/use either one of them or you will get them dirty.

 

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Cheeseweasel

Cheeseweasel 26438

Posted
Posted
9 hours ago, Patricio Swayze said:

I started dating my wife in 2006.  Started living together in 2009.  Married in 2011.  Kitchen towels are not my responsibility.  There are two towels hanging above the kitchen sink.  I still have no fucking clue what the difference and role of each towel is.

How else will the world know that “it’s always time for wine” or that you are “gnome for the holidays”?

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WhatTheBuck

WhatTheBuck 28805

Posted
Posted
10 hours ago, Patricio Swayze said:

I started dating my wife in 2006.  Started living together in 2009.  Married in 2011.  Kitchen towels are not my responsibility.  There are two towels hanging above the kitchen sink.  I still have no fucking clue what the difference and role of each towel is.

When one gets wet you use the other one.

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WhatTheBuck

WhatTheBuck 28805

Posted
Posted
20 hours ago, Underdog said:

Why do sloppy joes have to be so damn messy?  

I haven’t had a sloppy joe in years. I’ve never had Manwich. My mom always made them from scratch. But out of curiosity I looked for Manwich at the grocery store today. I thought maybe I’d buy a can. Lay’s potato chips were even on sale and I’m a proponent of putting potato chips on a sloppy joe under the bun. I walked up and down both canned food aisles twice and they don’t have it.

 

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