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GSU&UT

By GSU&UT
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GoPokes83

GoPokes83 2240

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Found a guy on OfferUp, who was selling empty propane tanks for $15/each. The ad said two. I get there and he has a whole pallet of empties from Ameri-gas. I paid for my 2 and got the hell on. Thinking about it now, I could have bought the whole pallet and sold them for $30/tank. Damn.

Propane guys will only fill them if they are under a certain age. If they’re old and in good shape you can get them recertified for another 5 years but that costs 10-15 bucks. However no matter how old or what kind of shape they’re in you can always exchange them at Wal Mart or wherever and get a newer one. 10 buck an hour dude don’t care!
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Last night I was having a dream where I was having sexy time with some random cute girl. And then out of nowhere the cute girl says, " let me try this" and then proceeds to stick her whole hand down h

Sbbruin
Sbbruin

Bullshit.  It's a dick move to knowingly jump in the express line with more items than allowed.  People get in that line to move quick.  It is their business if you fuck that up.

Richard Kimball
Richard Kimball

True story about Dolly Parton:  I think it was 1975, and she had just gone solo as an artist after being with Porter Wagoner. She had a concert scheduled for the Heart O' Texas Colosseum in Waco.

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Sandman

Sandman 3403

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On 3/22/2023 at 6:05 PM, SHOOTER12 said:

Can't beat a toothless Cherokee BJ...

Ain't no Cherokee down that way. You're getting Chickasaw, AKA white chicks with (at best) 1/64 blood who swear they had an "Indian princess" in their family tree. 

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Superhero

Superhero 8830

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On 3/22/2023 at 5:10 PM, Superhero said:

I’m in Hawaii for the week for a long overdue vacation. Hanging out by the pool at Aulani reading and people watching.

Americans as a whole are fat. I have a muffin top, but I’m going to judge anyway. I’d say most people can afford to lose 10-15% of their weight.

Also, white people like their tattoos.  Probably 25% of population between 21 and 40 have tattoos. Surprisingly I have yet to see a tramp stamp. Has that fad come and gone?

We left Aulani with mostly kids with their overweight parents and spent the last 2 nights in Waikiki beach. a lot younger crowd than at the Disney resort, and a lot less body fat, but the amount of tattoos stayed about the same.

 

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Kennythetiger

Kennythetiger 9381

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13 minutes ago, Lurch said:

Alcohol: Contributes to 3+ million deaths per year.

Modelo Lawyers: We need to put “Do not attempt” on screen when that grandma pulls the tortilla from her pan with her bare hand in our commercial

I haven’t seen your commercial, but I also have never seen a grandma use anything but fingertips to flip tortillas. 

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nnm

nnm 36394

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5 hours ago, Kennythetiger said:

I haven’t seen your commercial, but I also have never seen a grandma use anything but fingertips to flip tortillas. 

Verdad.
Where I grew up, all the abuelas made the tortillas on the old wood stove cooktops and of course flipped with their fingers. 
My friends and I would be out in the arroyos and mountains doing life threatening stuff all day. No one knew where we were or what we were doing and somehow we all survived. We’d roll in to one of our houses midafternoon/evening and inevitably the resident abuela would be making tortillas. 
The smell of those tortillas cooking, the taste of one fresh from the stove, smothered with fresh butter, is something that can’t be replicated with even the best store-bought or restaurant tortillas. A little taste of heaven. 

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YGIFS

YGIFS 19450

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My Mexican grandmother and aunt made the best ones.  I don’t either of them even owned a spatula.  That smell will be the last memory I lose I’m old age.  
 

I was cutting through an alley in California once with a girlfriend in my 20s. Somebody’s back window was open and like a ton of bricks, the smell of butter being warmed by a properly done homemade flour tortilla overcame me.  I stopped and stood and sniffed there for a couple minutes and wept. 

she thought I was weird.  We broke up shortly after that.  

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YGIFS

YGIFS 19450

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I want that fucking shirt at 0:07 mark.  And a half dozen homemade flour tortillas. 

My mom makes pretty good ones, but nothing like her sister and mom.  As a typical elementary school picky eater, I didn't like their tortillas if they had too many burnt circles on them.  My grandmother would just smile and make another one.  I felt bad complaining about them when I was younger.  Now that I look back, she smiled as she cooked up a new one because it gave her joy to cook for her loved ones.  She would hum, and sing, and whistle and try and teach me more Spanish.  I can hear her slippers shuffling across her kitchen table to the stove, as clear as I can hear the sound of her hand slapping down on the tortilla to slide it up to flip over.  The sound of that butter knife clanking down through the stick, at just the right heating moment to make sure it spread evenly. 

1000 drunk Waffle House visits and 1000 expensive brunches, and breakfast will never taste as good as it did when I was 6 in that little kitchen on the Rio Grande.  

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Crapinon

Crapinon 2257

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4 hours ago, Not that Bob said:

I remember this time I was listening to some Tannehill Weavers. It was really getting good to me...full on toe tapping and head bobbing. I looked up and said to myself, "Wait a dadgum minute! You're jamming  your ass off to...bagpipes!??!" Oh well. Wasn't the last time.

 

LOL. When I mentioned I played the pipes in another thread, I learned about two kinds of people. Those who love the pipes and those who said they would run you over while you were playing if they got the chance.

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Crapinon

Crapinon 2257

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I was going to put this in the Shit my kids says thread but it's not really my kids so I'm putting it here. I volunteer in Destination Imagination, a creative problem solving challenge for kids. I've been doing it 20+ years. The kids are given challenges and then told to come up with creative ways to solve said challenges, including creating stories, building props and machines to perform given task. I went to the state tournament this weekend and there were probably 3000+ kids there 1st-12th grade. There were 18 middle school teams in our section. I won't bore you with the details of what they had to do but 2 gems fell under "things that kids say".

In the first group the device failed to work. We were talking to the kids about it and one of the girls, about 12 yo said (with a lot of hand gestures) "We used it for 4 weeks and it worked every time. But we bring it to state and it looks at us square in the eyes and says, SCREW YOU, I'm not working today."  

The second gem had nothing to do with their machine but with their skit. The main points in there story: It took place in Alabama, the brother was too stupid to remember his own name, his sister was a pregnant teen, she faked the pregnancy for attention and the moral of the story told by the brother was "never trust your ex-wife" implying that he was married to and got his sister pregnant. 

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GoPokes83

GoPokes83 2240

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Why does Dish Network give a shit if I’m still watching? After a few hours if you don’t change the channel they ask if you’re still there and if you don’t push select on the remote quickly they throw up a screensaver. Doesn’t it take just as much energy to show that screensaver as it does to leave the programming on?

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Prepuce of Doom

Prepuce of Doom 21071

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1 hour ago, GoPokes83 said:

Why does Dish Network give a shit if I’m still watching? After a few hours if you don’t change the channel they ask if you’re still there and if you don’t push select on the remote quickly they throw up a screensaver. Doesn’t it take just as much energy to show that screensaver as it does to leave the programming on?

I don't think mine does that - there might be a setting/preference buried somewhere in one of the many impossibly hidden menus... 

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YGIFS

YGIFS 19450

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On 4/2/2023 at 10:45 AM, WhatTheBuck said:

Saw this in the grocery store yesterday. What is this world coming to?

1447AEAD-E08F-48FF-AEAB-003830C73C04.thumb.jpeg.36bd175324c2862955c6ffd33d3d9a4e.jpeg

 

Hey, if I wanna see a spicy, tall Latina shaking it, I'm going to Tick Tok.

Oh wait, they're literally talking about the Tejina spice from Mexico.  Yeah, fuck that.

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'stache

'stache 21814

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My neighborhood association page keeps getting requests to advertise air duct cleaning. Like twice a week they ask to post and I decline. I'm sure there is a legitimate service like this and that it might be needed in some situations, but the photos make it look like there's 40 years of dryer link built up inside the system. I'm almost certain its a scam. Even if not a full-on scam I'm not letting them post about that nonsense on the page. I don't know why it irritates me so much.

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Lurch

Lurch 5930

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My neighborhood association page keeps getting requests to advertise air duct cleaning. Like twice a week they ask to post and I decline. I'm sure there is a legitimate service like this and that it might be needed in some situations, but the photos make it look like there's 40 years of dryer link built up inside the system. I'm almost certain its a scam. Even if not a full-on scam I'm not letting them post about that nonsense on the page. I don't know why it irritates me so much.

Its almost never needed.

They invade every local Facebook group I’m in and all have rules pretty much written specifically just to keep them out.
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nnm

nnm 36394

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Posted (edited)
On 4/1/2023 at 8:14 PM, GoPokes83 said:

Why does Dish Network give a shit if I’m still watching? After a few hours if you don’t change the channel they ask if you’re still there and if you don’t push select on the remote quickly they throw up a screensaver. Doesn’t it take just as much energy to show that screensaver as it does to leave the programming on?

Trying to cancel Dish network is like trying to get out of a gang. Mom passed away last week.  She had Dish TV and internet.  We’re trying to cancel. It is literally impossible. My sister spent 90 minutes on the phone with them and they still didn’t cancel. The subscriber is literally dead. We are not interested in discounted service. 
We ended up having to simply cancel the auto-payment with the bank and send a certified letter. 

Edited by nnm
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GoPokes83

GoPokes83 2240

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Trying to cancel Dish network is like trying to get out of a gang. Mom passed away last week.  She had Dish TV and internet.  We’re trying to cancel. It is literally impossible. My sister spent 90 minutes on the phone with them and they still didn’t cancel. The subscriber is literally dead. We are not interested in discounted service. 
We ended up having to simply cancel the auto-payment with the bank and send a certified letter. 

Sirius XM is the same way.
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Armybrat

Armybrat 40841

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On 3/26/2023 at 4:58 PM, 52-80 said:

I mean yeah i dont speak polish, but how the fuck you gonna tell me “Krzyzewski” is pronounced “shef shef ski”

Speaking of Poles, I just found out that the cartoon character Popeye was based on a real life person, Frank “Rocky” Fiegle, who was born in Poland in 1868. (Died In Illinois in 1947)

 

BDCC45F8-6F9C-4C0E-BBA3-D66950CBD29C.jpeg

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Sandman

Sandman 3403

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Our HVAC guy came to do the spring check-up, as usual. I had the checkbook ready but once again, I got all flustered when I had to fill the damn thing out. I don't write checks often enough and I kept double checking everything, plus my pen died halfway through filling it out and it made me feel like a moron. I know he doesn't give a shit but I fucking hate it.

And no, independent tradesmen in Oklahoma ain't taking your venmo or whatever the fuck apps you'd prefer to use to pay them. This ain't Dallas, buddy. Write a check.

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YGIFS

YGIFS 19450

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I moved to Texas 30 years ago.  Now I spent several years at other institutions of higher education/grad school.  And have been here permanently over 20 years.  

I was today years old when I learned that April is Confederate History Month and that Texas is one of only 7 states that still celebrates it.  I don't want monument I'm gonna shit on first.  Internet bullshit aside, I had no idea this was a thing in all my decades in this wonderful place.  

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GoPokes83

GoPokes83 2240

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Our HVAC guy came to do the spring check-up, as usual. I had the checkbook ready but once again, I got all flustered when I had to fill the damn thing out. I don't write checks often enough and I kept double checking everything, plus my pen died halfway through filling it out and it made me feel like a moron. I know he doesn't give a shit but I fucking hate it.
And no, independent tradesmen in Oklahoma ain't taking your venmo or whatever the fuck apps you'd prefer to use to pay them. This ain't Dallas, buddy. Write a check.

I still write checks for property taxes and that’s it these days. Not even sure where the checkbook is. Saw a fairly young guy writing a check in a convenience store for a roll of Copenhagen the other day and it was weird seeing it.
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Kennythetiger

Kennythetiger 9381

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7 hours ago, YGIFS said:

I moved to Texas 30 years ago.  Now I spent several years at other institutions of higher education/grad school.  And have been here permanently over 20 years.  

I was today years old when I learned that April is Confederate History Month and that Texas is one of only 7 states that still celebrates it.  I don't want monument I'm gonna shit on first.  Internet bullshit aside, I had no idea this was a thing in all my decades in this wonderful place.  

Do you all still support slavery in your state constitution?  I can’t remember for sure. SEC!!!  

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