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GSU&UT

By GSU&UT
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ajax
ajax

Last night I was having a dream where I was having sexy time with some random cute girl. And then out of nowhere the cute girl says, " let me try this" and then proceeds to stick her whole hand down h

Sbbruin
Sbbruin

Bullshit.  It's a dick move to knowingly jump in the express line with more items than allowed.  People get in that line to move quick.  It is their business if you fuck that up.

Richard Kimball
Richard Kimball

True story about Dolly Parton:  I think it was 1975, and she had just gone solo as an artist after being with Porter Wagoner. She had a concert scheduled for the Heart O' Texas Colosseum in Waco.

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Underdog

Underdog 28695

Posted
Posted
9 hours ago, markstanco said:

Gave my first no tip today ever.

Got done eating lunch and asked the waitress (I was eating at the bar) for my check. She said sure. She then went to 2 tables, came back to the bar and poured 2 beers, took them to the tables, then proceeded to go to a table of 8 and took their order. All in all it took about 7-10 minutes. For her to cash me out it took 15 seconds tops.

The horror. 

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Guest

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

So Biden is called sleepy Joe as an insult.  Isn’t woke the opposite of sleepy?  If sleepy is bad, then wouldn’t woke be good?

So Ted Cruz is sleepy? These culture war insults are getting too confusing.

image.thumb.png.bdf9cd3e54ebfc352cee91a20f276c0a.png

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Scheiss Meister

Scheiss Meister 8408

Posted
Posted

When you are on a private well, you will always find out that your pump went out while you are taking your morning shower and the pressure drops to nothing.

On a related note, your well will only go out when you have other important things scheduled for that day that you cannot defer, delaying the start of the necessary work on the well.  Shit.

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nnm

nnm 36418

Posted
Posted
3 hours ago, Scheiss Meister said:

When you are on a private well, you will always find out that your pump went out while you are taking your morning shower and the pressure drops to nothing.

On a related note, your well will only go out when you have other important things scheduled for that day that you cannot defer, delaying the start of the necessary work on the well.  Shit.

Your last word is in fact an important task that must be done for the day and which requires water for proper disposal. 

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Scheiss Meister

Scheiss Meister 8408

Posted
Posted
57 minutes ago, nnm said:

Your last word is in fact an important task that must be done for the day and which requires water for proper disposal. 

Indeed.  And when I got to my first appointment, I found out that it was diarrhea.  At least I have been places this morning where I could use someone else's water for that.  Now I'm back home, and it's time to dig into the emergency stores.  At least we have that.

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tbone_

tbone_ 14128

Posted
Posted
A female colleague of mine just told me to rock out with my cock out before attending a customer meeting. Not the first time. Grounds for a sexual harassment law suit?

Can’t answer without pics. Of the female colleague.
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Dnaguy

Dnaguy 11989

Posted
Posted (edited)
On 2/18/2024 at 5:58 PM, GoPokes83 said:


461dfc1558d90ea2579a765f5106e743.jpg
Houston Dem DA candidate Sean Teare is a freaking Ted Cruz clone!

I would say that he’s whatever OpenAI’s DALLE-3 would generate if you prompted it with:

“Make a version of Ted Cruz that doesn’t make me want to slave away in the garage learning astrophysics and building a Time Machine for the only purpose of going back in time to murder everyone of his ancestors back until Homo sapiens overtook Neanderthals.”

 

 

Edited by Dnaguy
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YGIFS

YGIFS 19450

Posted
Posted
7 hours ago, Superhero said:

This is my kid’s entry to a local pinewood derby race. My son did most of the sanding and the easy painting. His sister put on the final touches.

IMG_1921.thumb.jpeg.fd2751705b0926cee761ebb7135fb0c3.jpeg

Well this year’s pinewood derby has certainly taken a fruitful twist.  

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Underdog

Underdog 28695

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2 hours ago, closetohumping said:

A female colleague of mine just told me to rock out with my cock out before attending a customer meeting. Not the first time. Grounds for a sexual harassment law suit?

Subtle way of telling you your fly is open. 

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markstanco

markstanco 12577

Posted
Posted
On 2/20/2024 at 8:21 AM, Scheiss Meister said:

When you are on a private well, you will always find out that your pump went out while you are taking your morning shower and the pressure drops to nothing.

On a related note, your well will only go out when you have other important things scheduled for that day that you cannot defer, delaying the start of the necessary work on the well.  Shit.

Mine has gone out twice on a weekend, but luckily it was the points both times so easy fix after a trip to Lowes/HD. 

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Scheiss Meister

Scheiss Meister 8408

Posted
Posted
1 hour ago, markstanco said:

Mine has gone out twice on a weekend, but luckily it was the points both times so easy fix after a trip to Lowes/HD. 

This time has been a journey.  The points are good and I was getting power all the way through, so I had to pull the pump out of the well to check it.  90 feet of pipe later, I find that a wire has rubbed against the side of the pump and parted.  I spliced the wire and bump tesed it and it still wouldn't run.  I found that the capacitor in the control box burst, probably due to the parted wire, so I need a new box (the burst capacitor made a real mess).  I am now searching for a new control box, but I need to help my dad with some stuff today, so it will probably be late tonight before I get the well back into service.  I love living the easy, relaxed country life.

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markstanco

markstanco 12577

Posted
Posted
17 minutes ago, Scheiss Meister said:

This time has been a journey.  The points are good and I was getting power all the way through, so I had to pull the pump out of the well to check it.  90 feet of pipe later, I find that a wire has rubbed against the side of the pump and parted.  I spliced the wire and bump tesed it and it still wouldn't run.  I found that the capacitor in the control box burst, probably due to the parted wire, so I need a new box (the burst capacitor made a real mess).  I am now searching for a new control box, but I need to help my dad with some stuff today, so it will probably be late tonight before I get the well back into service.  I love living the easy, relaxed country life.

My fear is the pump going out.  Luckily I have a great water table that is shallow (87 feet).  People who live 20 miles south of me have to go to 350+ feet.  

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SHOOTER12

SHOOTER12 8810

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Posted (edited)

Question..is instant coffee so different that it will mess your stomach up while regular coffee does not?

Our coffee consumption at home has dropped to minimal, so we started using Folgers instant in the little tubular packages. Every single time I drink it I get sour acidy stomach, yet if I drink coffee at a cafe etc I do not. Since I've got to have my morning caffeine gone t drinking the small 8.4oz Red Bulls, but damn those things are expensive.  What say ye Surly?

Edited by SHOOTER12
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thunderlounge

thunderlounge 7855

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Question..is instant coffee so different that it will mess your stomach up while regular coffee does not?

Our coffee consumption at home has dropped to minimal, so we started using Folgers instant in the little tubular packages. Every single time I drink it I get sour acidy stomach, yet if I drink coffee at a cafe etc I do not. Since I've got to have my morning caffeine gone t drinking the small 8.4oz Red Bulls, but damn those things are expensive.  What say ye Surly?


Fuck instant. Get a small brew pot (like a “4” cup), or a keurig. But really, the small pot. Then you have just enough for you, problem solved.

If you have a regular coffee pot already, make half pots.

 

tl;dr: fuck instant coffee

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ztejas

ztejas 43464

Posted
Posted
3 hours ago, SHOOTER12 said:

Question..is instant coffee so different that it will mess your stomach up while regular coffee does not?

Our coffee consumption at home has dropped to minimal, so we started using Folgers instant in the little tubular packages. Every single time I drink it I get sour acidy stomach, yet if I drink coffee at a cafe etc I do not. Since I've got to have my morning caffeine gone t drinking the small 8.4oz Red Bulls, but damn those things are expensive.  What say ye Surly?

Different coffee can have pretty wildly differing acidity levels. The darker the roast (and likely less shitty the coffee) the less it should bother your stomach. 

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Superhero

Superhero 8830

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Posted
3 hours ago, NAVY said:

Space Legos are best Legos. All other Legos can suck my dick 

IMG_2735.webp

Space LEGOs were the best. Mostly gray blocks (note 1) that you could build whatever you wanted because there were regular size with few "custom" shapes (note 2).

1 - I'm kinda OCD (?) and didn't want to mix too many colors, so 70% - 80% gray blocks were awesome.

2 - The new LEGOs are terrible. So many small pieces that are semi-custom to the thing you're building. You can't really build anything big using all these tiny pieces.

 

So in conclusion, LEGO bring back those Space LEGO kits from the 80s.

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Helobious

Helobious 9454

Posted
Posted
8 hours ago, InkaUtexas said:

If an inmate on death row in Colorado asked for edibles for his last meal would it be granted?

Most states no longer grant last meal requests to inmates prior to their execution. Their only option is whatever the prison is serving that day.

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InkaUtexas

InkaUtexas 25952

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42 minutes ago, Helobious said:

Most states no longer grant last meal requests to inmates prior to their execution. Their only option is whatever the prison is serving that day.

Dude, shhhhh.... You are dumber than your sports takes. And it was a question on a board.

Smith’s spiritual adviser, the Rev. Jeff Hood, said his last meal consisted of a Waffle House order: T-bone steak, hash browns and scrambled eggs in A.1. sauce and toast. Procedure around the method of execution reports meant Smith was denied food for eight hours before his death.

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/us-news/kenneth-smiths-last-meal-before-31965840

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Helobious

Helobious 9454

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Posted
22 minutes ago, InkaUtexas said:

Dude, shhhhh.... You are dumber than your sports takes. And it was a question on a board.

Smith’s spiritual adviser, the Rev. Jeff Hood, said his last meal consisted of a Waffle House order: T-bone steak, hash browns and scrambled eggs in A.1. sauce and toast. Procedure around the method of execution reports meant Smith was denied food for eight hours before his death.

https://www.mirror.co.uk/news/us-news/kenneth-smiths-last-meal-before-31965840

You’re dumberer

https://www.npr.org/sections/thetwo-way/2011/09/23/140735845/no-more-special-last-meals-for-death-row-inmates-in-texas

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