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Learn Me on Being on a US District Court Jury

RDCanecutter
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RDCanecutter

RDCanecutter 26476

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So I have been tapped to maybe serve on a jury. Questions for all the lawyers and convicted criminals among us:

0. I am not looking on tips for how to get out of it. Done that a few times already. I am so Covid crazy-bored that anything different, including jury duty, looks good.

1. Is it illegal for me to discuss it, as in starting a message board thread?

2. How much does it pay? I'm guessing $600-700/day, but if it's more, that's awesome.

3. Will the lawyers speak in accents from the 1930s?

4. How much other stuff can I do while I'm sitting there listening? I get that I shouldn't play with a phone, but can I take notes? And can I take notes in the form of drawing cartoons, cartoons which I later sell on Etsy?

5. What is the dress code? Could I dress in character, wearing a sharp suit one day, a moldy plaid shirt and camo jacket the next?

6. Will it be necessary to demonstrate my willingness to fight to other members of the jury? I don't intend to get pushed around.

7. How is the food at these things? Do I get food served to me, or do I have to find my own? I am on a Mediterranean diet (well, I may be by jury time) and will expect a shot of ouzo so I can digest my food.

8. If we are there a long time, is it usual for jurors to pair up and start Jury families? I am happily married but I ain't gay or nothin and want to know what's expected.

That's all I can think of right now, thanks.

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TXSG8R

TXSG8R 3362

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I got it for the DC in Waco.  You have to call every week to see if you need to come in.  Like week 4 I got the report message.  Drove up to Waco, found out it was some kind of error.  We all got credit for jury duty without actually doing anything.  I think they were just fishing for people that didn't check weekly/answer the summons, maybe that's what they do when they don't have any cases?  I can only provide these answers.  

2.  I don't remember the amount, but it wasn't anything approaching 3 figures.  Cooter may be right.

4. You cant even bring your phone into the building.  

5. You have to wear a coat and tie.  If you don't, they provide you with one that has probably been worn by 100 people that cant afford a coat. 

 

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Gil Bang

Gil Bang 26048

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4 hours ago, RDCanecutter said:

 

4. How much other stuff can I do while I'm sitting there listening? I get that I shouldn't play with a phone, but can I take notes? And can I take notes in the form of drawing cartoons, cartoons which I later sell on Etsy?

 

ScreenShot2015-01-09at11.12.23_1024x1024

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Paper_jam

Paper_jam 838

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Also don't forget to wear a powdered wig, and bring a small, gold-fringed flag which you can set on the table or banister in front of you. And if it's a drug case (or even if it's not) make sure to talk a lot about jury nullification.

 

 

Edited by Paper_jam
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StruggleBus

StruggleBus 3922

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11 minutes ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

Hopefully some day you will face judgement by a jury of people too stupid to get out of jury duty

Seriously though, I sometimes wonder about people that are on a jury. Did they actually want to do this? Are they bored? Were they so stupid that couldn't figure out a way to get out of it? 

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TXSG8R

TXSG8R 3362

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The one time I got selected for voir dire in regular JD I tried to go with the extreme burn this motherfucker answers to the prosecutors questions expecting the defense to strike me.  It was an assault case, husband beat up his wife, forget the other charges.  I wound up getting seated as a juror.  I guess Im too stupid to get out of it.  

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RDCanecutter

RDCanecutter 26476

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4 hours ago, StruggleBus said:

Seriously though, I sometimes wonder about people that are on a jury. Did they actually want to do this? Are they bored? Were they so stupid that couldn't figure out a way to get out of it? 

I feel the exact same way about people who go on Carnival cruises.

I actually have a magic card where I could get out of jury duty, so boredom is the main cause. Though I would not rule out stupid.

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BearSchlong

BearSchlong 8116

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Honestly I don't get the hate towards jury duty.  The one trial on which I served was really interesting, but then again I'm a John Grisham/Michael Connelly/legal thriller fan.

Carnival cruises aren't bad if you have a balcony suite and spend most of your time on the spa deck.

People watching is my favorite pastime.

Edited by BearSchlong
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StruggleBus

StruggleBus 3922

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58 minutes ago, BearSchlong said:

Honestly I don't get the hate towards jury duty.  The one trial on which I served was really interesting, but then again I'm a John Grisham/Michael Connelly/legal thriller fan.

Carnival cruises aren't bad if you have a balcony suite and spend most of your time on the spa deck.

People watching is my favorite pastime.

Are you unemployed?

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RDCanecutter

RDCanecutter 26476

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I was interested in Carnival cruises back when they had sales from Mobile to the Yucatan, like, 200 bucks. My idea was to go down there on the ship, bust loose in some non-tourist stop like Progreso and just never get back on, take my sweet time traveling by bus on over to Mexico City then back up into Texas, then figure it out from there.

I called up the office and they seemed somewhat surprised, and said they'd still have to charge me full price, but so long as I told them what I was doing it wouldn't be a problem. I'm like, 200 bucks for a couple-three nights at sea eating buffet food, why not.

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Prepuce of Doom

Prepuce of Doom 21106

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5 hours ago, NeverMarryAStripper said:

I realize that it's hard to believe these days, but some people actually think it's their responsibility to contribute to society.

This. 

And anyone talking shit about throwing out their summons, "too stupid to get out of it," etc., had better shut the fuck up whenever there's a verdict they don't agree with. 

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Nueces River Rat

Nueces River Rat 5539

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Served on a US District Court Jury in 2017 for a four day trial involving a drug smuggling ring.    I think the pay was $50 per day plus mileage to and from the courthouse.   Better than the $20 bucks and no mileage the county pays. 
 

I thought during voir dairy I was going to get struck by the Prosecution because I was pretty much saying legalize everything.  
 

 

Edited by Nueces River Rat
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RDCanecutter

RDCanecutter 26476

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19 hours ago, Nueces River Rat said:

Served on a US District Court Jury in 2017 for a four day trial involving a drug smuggling ring.    I think the pay was $50 per day plus mileage to and from the courthouse.   Better than the $20 bucks and no mileage the county pays. 
 

I thought during voir dairy I was going to get struck by the Prosecution because I was pretty much saying legalize everything.  
 

 

Well alright alright alright then. Since I'm about 3 miles from the courthouse, I'm picking up that maybe I ought to change my residence to Mom's house 90 miles away.

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HouTex

HouTex 1894

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Hard to believe some people just toss a jury summons. If I was the presiding judge I’d issue bench warrants for your fucking arrest and leave your ass in jail until you spent the time and money to hire a lawyer to get your ass out.

Sorry, this is a lawyer talking and civic duty and all that.

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TwiceHorn

TwiceHorn 31554

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3 hours ago, HouTex said:

Hard to believe some people just toss a jury summons. If I was the presiding judge I’d issue bench warrants for your fucking arrest and leave your ass in jail until you spent the time and money to hire a lawyer to get your ass out.

Sorry, this is a lawyer talking and civic duty and all that.

I think that is highly more likely in federal court than in state.  Federal jury summons usually result in much less of a cattle call than state.

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Nueces River Rat

Nueces River Rat 5539

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24 minutes ago, TwiceHorn said:

I think that is highly more likely in federal court than in state.  Federal jury summons usually result in much less of a cattle call than state.

Correct.   I think when I served a few years ago, the cattle call was something like 100 prospects.  Went fairly quickly to get down the final number, like by noon if I recall.  They were only picking one jury for a particular case where as you county/state jury selections, it involves the entire roster of District and County Courts and if you are in a larger county, the cattle call is much larger.   Down here they’ve streamlined it a tad where qualifications are done ahead of time in some courts and you are assigned fhe time and date to show up for the voir dire to where if you are lucky and didn’t want to serve, hopefully a plea is accepted or in a civil case a settlement.  
 

I wonder how big the backlogs are thanks to COVID?   Must be big because neither myself or my wife have received a summons since the pandemic began. Neve fails I get called several times before she gets one.  

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Gatorubet

Gatorubet 30321

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Seriously though, I sometimes wonder about people that are on a jury. Did they actually want to do this? Are they bored? Were they so stupid that couldn't figure out a way to get out of it? 

Thomas Jefferson said the right to a jury trial was more important than the right to vote. It is a duty in which every citizen should partake, and an important one.
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Armybrat

Armybrat 40920

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On 3/8/2021 at 1:26 PM, BearSchlong said:

Honestly I don't get the hate towards jury duty.  The one trial on which I served was really interesting, but then again I'm a John Grisham/Michael Connelly/legal thriller fan.

Carnival cruises aren't bad if you have a balcony suite and spend most of your time on the spa deck.

People watching is my favorite pastime.

I was selected for jury duty in Sam Sparks’ federal district court decades ago. The case was a lawsuit by some old white dude against Southwest Texas State claiming age discrimination because his old ass got passed over for promotion to some useless coffee drinking staff job.

About halfway through the initial arguments that afternoon, the judge had Billy the Bailiff take us back into the jury room while the two parties did some hashing out.  He was full of good courtroom war stories to keep us entertained. Funny guy.

Judge Sparks stepped into the room to jaw a bit with us, laughing about how “ there is some really bad lawyering going on out there” (verbatim quote). A few minutes later when we returned to the courtroom we were dismissed because a settlement had been reached.

i got a paper check several weeks later for $18.

A few months after that small amusement, Billy the Bailiff was fired for making insensitive comments to a jury in the deliberation room.

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TwiceHorn

TwiceHorn 31554

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16 minutes ago, Armybrat said:

there is some really bad lawyering going on out there

Doesn't surprise me from Sparks, or a number of other judges in private.

In public at the end of civil cases, though, judges are usually effusive in their praise for the lawyers that appeared and the case they put on. And many times that's when one or both sets of lawyers have been gigantic, contentious pains in the ass.

I'm not 100% sure what the motivation for that is.  I think it may be euphoria from having made it through a trial and maybe a desire to soften whatever blow the jury is about to or just has delivered.

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