Dickhead Neighbors Meta Thread

[beer 3,220]

I checked in to see if there were photos of my home here.  Buncha OCD assholes thinking any project ever has to be finished. I regularly cook brisket and let all the kids swim in our pool though to pay it forward. 

Edited May 9, 2018 by beer

[PvilleStang 2,911]

49 minutes ago, beer said:

I checked in to see if there were photos of my home here.  Buncha OCD assholes thinking any project ever has to be finished. I regularly cook brisket and let all the kids swim in our pool though to pay it forward. 

Avatar checks out.

[Parliament 14,260]

My neighbors are all awesome.  So maybe I'm the dickhead?

[Jkwellborn 6,704]

Who is generating the garbage while you're out of town? 

Jody.

[C-Man 27,230]

 

[Dewey 3,286]

Neighbor's cousin Eddie moved into the neighborhood. I dont mind, I find it funny, hoping one of the neighbors loses their shit. I dont see Eddie moving anytime soon, as his ride is broke down.

Sent from my SM-G960U using Tapatalk

[Jerry Callo 8,704]

The broken RV reminds me of my former across the street neighbors.  Wife worked and did everything around the house, husband smoked pot like Bob Marley.  Wife went to visit friends or family in Hawaii for a week or so, during which time husband decides he's moving out.  He parked an RV in front of the house to load his stuff and get out before she got back from her trip.  Unfortunately for him, he couldn't get the RV running when it was time to run.  She came home a day or so early to a broken down RV and a dumbass husband trying to get it started.  They didn't stay together much longer and both of them moved away.

[Jerry Callo 8,704]

On 5/10/2018 at 3:28 PM, C-Man said:

 

" . . . she was eating Bugles like Nabisco needed their bags back."

I lost it there.

 

[Sbbruin 21,858]

That vid is awesome.  "She was eating Bugles like Nabisco need their bags back."

 

edit Callo beat me to it.

Edited May 14, 2018 by Sbbruin

[C-Man 27,230]

1 minute ago, Jerry Callo said:

" . . . she was eating Bugles like Nabisco needed their bags back."

I lost it there.

 

 

Just now, Sbbruin said:

That vid is awesome.  "She was eating Bugles like Nabisco need their bags back."

Apparently, that guy is a stand-up comedian that first used this Donnie Baker character on some radio show. I didn't know that when I first posted that. (And it's odd the guy saying "Go Fuck Yourself" from the upstairs window doesn't sound like the same guy.)

[Homercles 10,206]

Is it only in the mohnin? Sposed to be up cookin breakfast fo sum body. Like an alarm clock. Woo woo!

[Gil Bang 25,960]

3 hours ago, Dewey said:

Neighbor's cousin Eddie moved into the neighborhood. I dont mind, I find it funny, hoping one of the neighbors loses their shit. I dont see Eddie moving anytime soon, as his ride is broke down.

Sent from my SM-G960U using Tapatalk
 

That's a "Lazy Daze".  My grandpa owned one.  Made in Pomona CA.  Quality RV for sure. 

[Sbbruin 21,858]

1 minute ago, Gil Bang said:

That's a "Lazy Daze".  My grandpa owned one.  Made in Pomona CA.  Quality RV for sure. 

Shitter's full.

[Doc Holliday 199]

my upstairs neighbors are an obese couple with him around 280-290 and she is close if not more than 300 as well.  I swear to god they are going to fall through the ceiling and make noise from 5:30am till after midnight every day.   Fuck them.  I refuse to make friends with them because that will take away from my disdain.  They have two dogs and only walk 2 feet from their stairs to let the dogs do their business.  And when they walk down the stairs, it's like a total solar eclipse in my windows from her blocking the sun light.

[Homercles 10,206]

Yeah fuck apartments

[Judge Roybeanbag 11,819]

16 hours ago, Doc Holliday said:

my upstairs neighbors are an obese couple with him around 280-290 and she is close if not more than 300 as well.  I swear to god they are going to fall through the ceiling and make noise from 5:30am till after midnight every day.   Fuck them.  I refuse to make friends with them because that will take away from my disdain.  They have two dogs and only walk 2 feet from their stairs to let the dogs do their business.  And when they walk down the stairs, it's like a total solar eclipse in my windows from her blocking the sun light.

Buy a cheap scale off Craigslist and leave it outside their door.

[Doc Holliday 199]

7 minutes ago, Judge Roybeanbag said:

Buy a cheap scale off Craigslist and leave it outside their door.

Shit, I'll give them my cheap Taylor scale.

[jofus 2,266]

On 4/30/2018 at 2:00 PM, PvilleStang said:

We have a house in our neighborhood that has about 4 or 5 muscle cars that have gutted their exhaust (straight pipes, no cats, mufflers, etc) and tuned them.  Usually, wouldn't care too damn much, but these dumb asses are driving through the hood in 2nd gear revving the shit out of the car, shaking houses 2-3 blocks away, and we've even gotten notice in our HOA newsletter last week about people "racing" through our neighborhood.  This is especially fun when it's 10 in the evening, and my pregnant wife is awakened by a fly fart in the other side of the house.  Snitches get stitches, so how do I get this shit resolved without calling Greg?

had the same problem in our neighborhood.  someone complained to the city, and turns out there is a noise ordinance they were exceeding. no more problems after that.

[wd40 1,976]

On 5/14/2018 at 4:58 PM, Homercles said:

Yeah fuck apartments

do you even knock three times on the ceiling, bro?

[CfRhTxStBobcats 602]

On 4/30/2018 at 2:22 PM, Gil Bang said:

Damn, I don't remember the car being that old.

[crimsonlonghorn 2,306]

Rather than start a new thread, I'll resurrect this one. 

Bought our house in Sugar Land 6 years ago. Original neighbors on both sides were great. Both families have since moved out and the new ones aren't as great. 

Last November a storm come through that blew over my backyard fence on both sides. Fence was almost 30 years old and original with the subdivision. It was already rickety and we knew it was about to die. 

Dog kept getting out of the yard and the fence needed to be replaced, so I just went ahead and hired someone and took care of it and then asked both neighbors to pay back their share to me. 

Motherfuckers on the north side - who knocked on our door to complain about it the day it happened and literally said, "It needs to be fixed" - have yet to pay us a dime. Said for a while they were going to, now they don't say anything. 

Motherfucker on the south side - who has pled poverty for the past six months because his Navy reserve situation makes his employment unpredictable - bought a brand new pickup in April and then construction started a week ago on this (gunnite trucks are in front of my house this morning):

 

 

I am of the mind to go find a bunch of wood waste somewhere in the neighborhood and throw it into that fucking hole tonight after it gets dark. 

We are about to start construction on a house on our farm where the neighbors are far away and polite. I can't wait to get out of this neighborhood. 

Edited June 13, 2020 by crimsonlonghorn

[Jkwellborn 6,704]

Neighbor got a pit. Fucking dog got out and killed my wife and kids 15 year old cat while it was in our yard. They saw it when they got home from vacation.

[Judge Roybeanbag 11,819]

3 hours ago, Jkwellborn said:

Neighbor got a pit. Fucking dog got out and killed my wife and kids 15 year old cat while it was in our yard. They saw it when they got home from vacation.

Phrasing, dude!  Had to read it twice.  Sorry about the cat though that sucks.

[MonkeyDoughnut 10,253]

39 minutes ago, Judge Roybeanbag said:

Phrasing, dude!  Had to read it twice.  Sorry about the cat though that sucks.

Lol... I did same thing.. wait what ???

[Dbeasy 15,052]

Rather than start a new thread, I'll resurrect this one. 
Bought our house in Sugar Land 6 years ago. Original neighbors on both sides were great. Both families have since moved out and the new ones aren't as great. 
Last November a storm come through that blew over my backyard fence on both sides. Fence was almost 30 years old and original with the subdivision. It was already rickety and we knew it was about to die. 
Dog kept getting out of the yard and the fence needed to be replaced, so I just went ahead and hired someone and took care of it and then asked both neighbors to pay back their share to me. 
Motherfuckers on the north side - who knocked on our door to complain about it the day it happened and literally said, "It needs to be fixed" - have yet to pay us a dime. Said for a while they were going to, now they don't say anything. 
Motherfucker on the south side - who has pled poverty for the past six months because his Navy reserve situation makes his employment unpredictable - bought a brand new pickup in April and then construction started a week ago on this (gunnite trucks are in front of my house this morning):
 

 
I am of the mind to go find a bunch of wood waste somewhere in the neighborhood and throw it into that fucking hole tonight after it gets dark. 
We are about to start construction on a house on our farm where the neighbors are far away and polite. I can't wait to get out of this neighborhood. 

Wow we own a rental house in Greatwood in Sugar Land and also had a fence go down from that storm. Unlike your situation, both our neighbors were standup about contributing.

[Dbeasy 15,052]

Neighbor got a pit. Fucking dog got out and killed my wife and kids 15 year old cat while it was in our yard. They saw it when they got home from vacation.

I’m sorry to hear that the dog killed both your wife and the kid’s 15 year old cat. Grammar.

[ShaggyBevo RIP 3,868]

[RMac5 1,551]

When this got bumped I was afraid Dillo Pad had moved in next to one of you surly bastards. Glad it’s only normal shitty neighbors and not the Dillo.

[Gil Bang 25,960]

6 hours ago, crimsonlonghorn said:

Rather than start a new thread, I'll resurrect this one. 

Bought our house in Sugar Land 6 years ago. Original neighbors on both sides were great. Both families have since moved out and the new ones aren't as great. 

Last November a storm come through that blew over my backyard fence on both sides. Fence was almost 30 years old and original with the subdivision. It was already rickety and we knew it was about to die. 

Dog kept getting out of the yard and the fence needed to be replaced, so I just went ahead and hired someone and took care of it and then asked both neighbors to pay back their share to me. 

Motherfuckers on the north side - who knocked on our door to complain about it the day it happened and literally said, "It needs to be fixed" - have yet to pay us a dime. Said for a while they were going to, now they don't say anything. 

Motherfucker on the south side - who has pled poverty for the past six months because his Navy reserve situation makes his employment unpredictable - bought a brand new pickup in April and then construction started a week ago on this (gunnite trucks are in front of my house this morning):

 

 

I am of the mind to go find a bunch of wood waste somewhere in the neighborhood and throw it into that fucking hole tonight after it gets dark. 

We are about to start construction on a house on our farm where the neighbors are far away and polite. I can't wait to get out of this neighborhood. 

placeholder for pic of that aggy that tore down his fence

[Updawg 2,266]

When this got bumped I was afraid Dillo Pad had moved in next to one of you surly bastards. Glad it’s only normal shitty neighbors and not the Dillo.

Forgot about that guy. Very strange guy, was entertaining for a bit though


Those sugar land neighbors building the pool suck. Throw some dog shit in it when they complete it

[texhorn 351]

I have had nothing but issues with neighbors and fences. Commit and then back out. Claim no money and put in a detached garage. Demand money for work done before I lived in the house. Next house I’m putting in a moat.

[Gil Bang 25,960]

When this got bumped I was afraid Dillo Pad had moved in next to one of you surly bastards. Glad it’s only normal shitty neighbors and not the Dillo.

Is someone sad about their station in life?

[woohorn 1,131]

You should suck up to them. That's a sweet lookin' pool.

[NWBuck 8,570]

15 hours ago, Jkwellborn said:

Neighbor got a pit. Fucking dog, got out and killed my wife and kids 15 year old cat while it was in our yard. They saw it when they got home from vacation.

 

10 hours ago, Dbeasy said:

I’m sorry to hear that the dog killed both your wife and the kid’s 15 year old cat. Grammar.

Just think how much more fun it would have been with just one comma.

Edited June 14, 2020 by NWBuck

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

Brothers new neighbors built a dog run right next to the privacy fence seperating their 2 properties. Their part bull ( gasp, it can't be, they're such gentle creatures) dug under the fence, and killed my brothers cat. Neighbors said tough shit it's not our fault.....  Animal control said they wouldn't do shit because it's animal on animal violence.

[Jkwellborn 6,704]

Brothers new neighbors built a dog run right next to the privacy fence seperating their 2 properties. Their part bull ( gasp, it can't be, they're such gentle creatures) dug under the fence, and killed my brothers cat. Neighbors said tough shit it's not our fault.....  Animal control said they wouldn't do shit because it's animal on animal violence.

I have absolutely no doubt what is going to happen if the dog shows up in my yard again. We are going to have to have a sit down and discuss the shit.

[Jerry Callo 8,704]

22 hours ago, crimsonlonghorn said:

Rather than start a new thread, I'll resurrect this one. 

Bought our house in Sugar Land 6 years ago. Original neighbors on both sides were great. Both families have since moved out and the new ones aren't as great. 

Last November a storm come through that blew over my backyard fence on both sides. Fence was almost 30 years old and original with the subdivision. It was already rickety and we knew it was about to die. 

Dog kept getting out of the yard and the fence needed to be replaced, so I just went ahead and hired someone and took care of it and then asked both neighbors to pay back their share to me. 

Motherfuckers on the north side - who knocked on our door to complain about it the day it happened and literally said, "It needs to be fixed" - have yet to pay us a dime. Said for a while they were going to, now they don't say anything. 

Motherfucker on the south side - who has pled poverty for the past six months because his Navy reserve situation makes his employment unpredictable - bought a brand new pickup in April and then construction started a week ago on this (gunnite trucks are in front of my house this morning):

 

 

I am of the mind to go find a bunch of wood waste somewhere in the neighborhood and throw it into that fucking hole tonight after it gets dark. 

We are about to start construction on a house on our farm where the neighbors are far away and polite. I can't wait to get out of this neighborhood. 

I suggest you take down the fence until they decide to pay their share.  They are not going to like no fence with that pool.  They are probably required to have a fence with that pool.  Maybe wait until they start filling the pool with water.  Actually not having a fence at the time of inspection is probably the best bet.

Edited June 14, 2020 by Jerry Callo

[crimsonlonghorn 2,306]

1 hour ago, Jerry Callo said:

I suggest you take down the fence until they decide to pay their share.  They are not going to like no fence with that pool.  They are probably required to have a fence with that pool.  Maybe wait until they start filling the pool with water.  Actually not having a fence at the time of inspection is probably the best bet.

Actually not a bad idea at all. Just pop off the pickets on my side.

[Hornius Emeritus 12,464]

4 minutes ago, crimsonlonghorn said:

Actually not a bad idea at all. Just pop off the pickets on my side.

After that, you could probably find and pay a couple of homeless dudes to leer into their backyard for a couple of hours. I'll bet the check would be forthcoming.

[crimsonlonghorn 2,306]

9 hours ago, woohorn said:

You should suck up to them. That's a sweet lookin' pool.

Already got one of my own. 

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

1 hour ago, Jkwellborn said:

I have absolutely no doubt what is going to happen if the dog shows up in my yard again. We are going to have to have a sit down and discuss the shit.

Yeah "new neighbor" was actually 8 months ago, They moved out this past week. They were renters. It wouldn't have gone down well for my brother if there was a confrontation, neighbor was a big redneck (not that there's anything wrong with that) looking for a fight.. so was her boyfriend....

[crimsonlonghorn 2,306]

3 minutes ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

Yeah "new neighbor" was actually 8 months ago, They moved out this past week. They were renters. It wouldn't have gone down well for my brother if there was a confrontation, neighbor was a big redneck (not that there's anything wrong with that) looking for a fight.. so was her boyfriend....

There is a very strong correlation between bad neighbors and renters, especially in middle class single family neighborhoods. 

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

4 minutes ago, crimsonlonghorn said:

There is a very strong correlation between bad neighbors and renters, especially in middle class single family neighborhoods. 

This is true in many neighborhoods. 

[Upgrayedd 5,813]

2 hours ago, crimsonlonghorn said:

Actually not a bad idea at all. Just pop off the pickets on my side.

And paint "Fuck You Cheap Bastards" on their side of the pickets when you put them back up.

[Parliament 14,260]

Brothers new neighbors built a dog run right next to the privacy fence seperating their 2 properties. Their part bull ( gasp, it can't be, they're such gentle creatures) dug under the fence, and killed my brothers cat. Neighbors said tough shit it's not our fault.....  Animal control said they wouldn't do shit because it's animal on animal violence.

A man's got a right to protect his family and cats.

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

30 minutes ago, Parliament said:

A man's got a right to protect his family and cats.

Yeah... not thinking killing the animal like that is especially humane.   Now a welcome wagon cake for the new neighbors, baked with a shit load of colon blow, and Exlax ???........

[Jkwellborn 6,704]

Maybe he should just go fuck the guys wife

[crimsonlonghorn 2,306]

28 minutes ago, Jkwellborn said:

Maybe he should just go fuck the guys wife

Are we talking about the dead wife or someone else?

[Parliament 14,260]

Yeah... not thinking killing the animal like that is especially humane.   Now a welcome wagon cake for the new neighbors, baked with a shit load of colon blow, and Exlax ???........

In case you were wondering, I'm definitely joking. That's a miserable way to die.

[tx 3 putt 76,980]

On 6/13/2020 at 10:40 AM, Jkwellborn said:

Neighbor got a pit. Fucking dog got out and killed my wife and kids 15 year old cat while it was in our yard. They saw it when they got home from vacation.

pics of your dead wife ?