What'm I gonna do with 40 subscriptions to "Vibe?"

[Rimbo 25,936]

This is a FUCK!

[RamjetFDO 10,575]

Back up in your ass with the resurrection...

[Guest Lobo]

I have excellent networking skills.

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

Goooood morning........

[Biff Tannen 45,688]

MOTHER SHITTER!!!

[Parliament 14,260]

I have  a cousin whose's a crackHEAD...

[usmc0331horn 953]

No thanks man. I don't want you fucking up my life too.

[billfromlaketravis 11,482]

 

[Upgrayedd 5,812]

If things go well I might be showing her my O face

[jeevsie 3,734]

For some reason this weekend, I really wanted some pizza shooters, shrimp poppers, or extreme fajitas.  The restaurant we were at didn't have them. I was disappoint.

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

1 minute ago, jeevsie said:

For some reason this weekend, I really wanted some pizza shooters, shrimp poppers, or extreme fajitas.  The restaurant we were at didn't have them. I was disappoint.

You probably need some more flair.

[GreenspointTexas 9,602]

The guy made a million dollars!

[Knoxtnhorn 5,976]

That's the worst idea I've ever heard.

Why should I change my name?  I'm not the one who sucks.

[Native Horn 3,504]

43 minutes ago, Upgrayedd said:

If things go well I might be showing her my O face

You know what I'm talkin' about....

[Jerry Callo 8,703]

I believe you have my stapler.

[Dennis Taylor 18,828]

That'd be great...

[FunkSoulBrother 931]

Two chicks at the same time

[futureman 22,464]

corporate accounts payable, this is nina speaking, just a moment...

[BigDHornfan 6,548]

Yes, I am also not a pussy

[lateshow 1,304]

It's a mat. With different conclusions you can jump to. 

[AUS-97HORN 11,763]

Does anybody ever say to you, sounds like someone has a case of the Mondays?

 

No.

No, man, Shit, no.... man.

I believe you'd get your ass kicked saying something like that

 

 

[Surly Bevo 24,908]

Hey Peter, check it out, channel 9, it’s the breast exams!

[Stunns38 3,460]

we fixed the glitch. So he won't be receiving a paycheck anymore, so it will just work itself out naturally.

[idigTexas 2,288]

I told those fudge packers I liked Michael Bolton's music.

Edited April 26, 2021 by idigTexas

[threesheets 1,673]

The pleasure's all on this side of the table, trust me.

[tx ind 7,013]

and boy that's just a straight shooter with upper management written all over him

[Firemans4Horn 18,050]

I gotta wake my ass up at 6am every morning this week; drive up to Las Colinas...

Yeah, I'm doing the drywall at the new McDonalds.

[Radical Larry 28,621]

PC load letter? What the fuck does that mean?

[notre dame joe 187]

I get the feeling that she's cheating on me. 

[PantsTent 2,002]

It's wearing off now, but when I saw that fat man keel over and die, Michael, I realized that we don't have a lot of time on this earth. We weren't meant to spend it this way. Human beings weren't meant to sit in little cubicles, starring at computer screens all day, filling out useless forms and listening to eight different bosses drone on about mission statements.

[ChickenSandwich 9,836]

[usmc0331horn 953]

This is a big promotion Pete.

It's huge.

[Rimbo 25,936]

10 hours ago, Firemans4Horn said:

I gotta wake my ass up at 6am every morning this week; drive up to Las Colinas...

Yeah, I'm doing the drywall at the new McDonalds.

This line is so brilliant. Set up for that part of town, you're thinking "stockbroker" or something... nope. Drywall. At a McD's.

[Firemans4Horn 18,050]

Samir Naga... Naga... Naga... Not gonna work here anymore, anyway.

 

 

[TrashMaster G 17,557]

On 4/26/2021 at 11:18 AM, Stunns38 said:

we fixed the glitch. So he won't be receiving a paycheck anymore, so it will just work itself out naturally.

We FIXED the GLITCH.

[Da Fino 2,783]

Are you any relation to the pop singer?

 

I celebrate the guy's entire catalogue.

[PantsTent 2,002]

2 hours ago, Rimbo said:

This line is so brilliant. Set up for that part of town, you're thinking "stockbroker" or something... nope. Drywall. At a McD's.

And then he has his own bottle opener.  Of course I also carry a small one on my key chain.

[Parliament 14,260]

I get the feeling that she's cheating on me. 

Yeah I get that feeling too.

[usmc0331horn 953]

You know the Nazis had pieces of flair they made the Jews wear.

[Jive Turkey 12,598]

On 4/26/2021 at 7:37 AM, usmc0331horn said:

No thanks man. I don't want you fucking up my life too.

that line cracks me up just reading it.  i don't even have to watch it.  i'm laughing now just thinking about.  the mumble makes it pop.

this came out a few months ago, so it may have already been posted, but fuck it.  it's brilliant.

https://www.theringer.com/movies/2019/2/19/18228673/office-space-oral-history

Edited April 27, 2021 by Jive Turkey

[demos 3,003]

Watch your cornhole

[Jerry Callo 8,703]

No, not again . . . why does it say paper jam when there is no paper jam? I swear to God, one of these days, I just kick this piece of shit out the window.

[Guest Lobo]

So does he drive everyday from Austin to Las Colinas?  

20 years later and we're still sitting in the same traffic jams, avoiding contact with the same panhandlers.  Judge is so prescient.  

 

[Biff Tannen 45,688]

28 minutes ago, Lobo said:

So does he drive everyday from Austin to Las Colinas?  

20 years later and we're still sitting in the same traffic jams, avoiding contact with the same panhandlers.  Judge is so prescient.  

 

It was also filmed in DFW.

[Knoxtnhorn 5,976]

2 CSB alerts.

1. I've been high like 5 times my entire life.  One of the times, this movie came on.  I honestly thought I was going to die I was laughing so hard.  The look on Michael Bolton's face when he said, "That's the worst idea I've ever heard in my life..."

2. I was working at a restaurant while in college.  Guy pays with a CC.  His name is Michael Bolton.  Of course, I had to show all of my friends.  Then, I went out and asked him if he was related to the singer.  His reply.  "I've heard this before and it's not funny."  

[Sbbruin 21,853]

Peter Gibbons:
So I was sitting in my cubicle today, and I realized, ever since I started working, every single day of my life has been worse than the day before it. So that means that every single day that you see me, that's on the worst day of my life.

Dr. Swanson:
What about today? Is today the worst day of your life?

Peter Gibbons:
Yeah.

Dr. Swanson:
Wow, that's messed up.

[CooterBrown 18,013]

The little details are great. Like the apartment complex is named Morningwood and the sign is on screen for about 1 second.

[WBT 20,572]

Hell, Lumbergh fucked her

[Onboard 2.0 9,083]

There were grains of salt .... big grains of salt........

[Parliament 14,260]

2 hours ago, Sbbruin said:

Peter Gibbons:
So I was sitting in my cubicle today, and I realized, ever since I started working, every single day of my life has been worse than the day before it. So that means that every single day that you see me, that's on the worst day of my life.

Dr. Swanson:
What about today? Is today the worst day of your life?

Peter Gibbons:
Yeah.

Dr. Swanson:
Wow, that's messed up.

Dude, you can't just copy and paste quotes.  We have RULES, you savage.