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Eternals -- Marvel's Next Guardians of the Galaxy? Jolie, Hayek, Jon Snow, Robb Stark, and More

Patrick Bateman

By Patrick Bateman
in Movies and TV

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formermav43

formermav43 4606

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Posted
10 minutes ago, naija said:

Marvel has been so successful, people are rewriting their memories to believe the success was inevitable..

You mean you don’t think a third team group of heroes featuring a sentient tree, talking raccoon, and led by Andy Dwyer was predestined to be a smash hit?

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Beantown Express 2.0

Beantown Express 2.0 6559

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Posted
5 hours ago, crash_davis said:

Thor 3 is my fav Marvel movies. It re-made a stale Thor into a better character. Not sure how much of that was Waititi and how much of it was Marvel team. Maybe a little of both? Waititi was also a relative nobody before that movie.

Shit, what had Favreau done before Iron Man? He and Downey Jr basically made up the script/shit as they went along. Marvel has come a LONG way since them.

https://io9.gizmodo.com/jeff-bridges-admits-iron-man-movie-had-no-script-5417310

Jeff Bridges:

"They had no script, man. They had an outline. We would show up for big scenes every day and we wouldn't know what we were going to say. We would have to go into our trailer and work on this scene and call up writers on the phone, 'You got any ideas?' Meanwhile the crew is tapping their foot on the stage waiting for us to come on."

Bridges, director Jon Favreau and Robert Downey Jr. would literally act out sequences during primitive rehearsals, Downey taking on Bridges's role and vice versa, to find and essentially improvise their way to full scenes, the actor recounts. Bridges says that the entire production was probably saved by the improv prowess of the film's director and star.

"You've got the suits from Marvel in the trailer with us saying, 'No, you wouldn't say that,'" Bridges continued. "You would think with a $200 million movie you'd have the shit together, but it was just the opposite. And the reason for that is because they get ahead of themselves. They have a release date before the script, ‘Oh, we'll have the script before that time,' and they don't have their shit together.

"Jon dealt with it so well," Bridges continues. "It freaked me out. I was very anxious. I like to be prepared. I like to know my lines, man, that's my school. Very prepared. That was very irritating, and then I just made this adjustment. It happens in movies a lot where something's rubbing against your fur and it's not feeling right, but it's just the way it is. You can spend a lot of energy bitching about that or you can figure out how you're going to do it, how you're going to play this hand you've been dealt. What you can control is how you perceive things and your thinking about it. So I said, ‘Oh, what we're doing here, we're making a $200 million student film. We're all just fuckin' around! We're playin'. Oh, great!' That took all the pressure off. ‘Oh, just jam, man, just play.' And it turned out great!"

Is it terrible that I read this whole thing in Lebowski’s voice picturing Lebowski saying it?  Maybe Jeff Bridges is a lot like the dude.  

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atomheartbevo

atomheartbevo 89799

Posted
Posted
16 minutes ago, naija said:

Marvel has been so successful, people are rewriting their memories to believe the success was inevitable..

2 minutes ago, formermav43 said:

You mean you don’t think a third team group of heroes featuring a sentient tree, talking raccoon, and led by Andy Dwyer was predestined to be a smash hit?

Depends on when you think the success was inevitable.

When they pulled off the first Thor (and made decent money), that was when I felt like it was going to be successful.  Captain America/First Avenger was a little shaky money-wise, but it didn't matter by then, and First Avenger was always going to be shaky simply because it was a cheesy WWII comic book movie.

That's why I still argue that Thor was the most important MCU movie.  Captain America First Avenger and The Avengers were still going to happen - Avengers was already well into production (and CA was only a few months after Thor), but if Thor bombs, and CA follows suit, and the Avengers doesn't grab people, do they go back to just Iron Man movies and try something else?

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HornOnTheBayou

HornOnTheBayou 8946

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6 hours ago, Richard Kimball said:

The director matters a lot. This is an extreme example, but Frank Capra directing "Kill Bill" and Quentin Tarantino directing "It's a Wonderful Life" would have produced radically different movies. It would be like Marie Osmond singing "Cocaine Blues."

"Ezekiel 25:17. Everytime a goddamn bell rings, a fuckin' angel gets its motherfuckin' wings."

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mr. sunshine

mr. sunshine 2833

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On 5/25/2021 at 8:53 PM, atomheartbevo said:

Or Marie Osmond and Donnie Osmond singing 'Afternoon Delight'.

My jr. high art teacher was big on art projects based on popular songs so she assigned us this one day. Evidently she was the only one oblivious to what the song was about because she shut it down after just a couple of presentations. Come to think of it I don’t think she ever married 

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Scooter Monzingo

Scooter Monzingo 821

Posted
Posted
21 hours ago, DonkeyCigars said:

The ensemble cast in this trailer feels tired. Questlove guy being funny, Danish and an old Angelina Jolie who exhausts me with her whole deal. I'll have to hear from you guys if this is worth a watch.

Never really cared for Jolie. But since I first saw her in Hackers, I felt pretty strongly that she has to be an incredible fuck. At least that is what I want to believe.

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DonkeyCigars

DonkeyCigars 143

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Just now, Scooter Monzingo said:

Never really cared for Jolie. But since I first saw her in Hackers, I felt pretty strongly that she has to be an incredible fuck. At least that is what I want to believe.

I don’t know, she seems like a miserable person. Or at least a miserable person to be with from what I think Brad Pitt intimated.

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Guest Lobo

Guest Lobo

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Posted
6 hours ago, Herpa Derpa said:

Depends. Not everyone digs a cheese Danish. 

But what if there were two of them?  What would that be called?  I could dig that. 

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freyguy

freyguy 4289

Posted
Posted
4 hours ago, Scooter Monzingo said:

She very well be, but I’m just speculating on the idea that when Joile gets horny, it’s a long 8 seconds in the saddle.

she insists upon herself, is weird as fuck, and has a pile of adopted kids to feed.

which checks a number of boxes on my list.

 

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Mitch Cumsteen

Mitch Cumsteen 18575

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Posted

So I saw this one last night at the request of my kids. Expectations were very low going in, so I didn't dislike it as much as I thought that I would. Still, it's one of my least favorite Marvel movies. Better than the Thor one that took itself too seriously, but off the top of my head, it's definitely in the bottom tier.

I feel like the production value on all the Marvel movies is so good, that the floor is pretty high for all of them as popcorn flicks, but character development was poor and the storyline didn't work that well. It never really felt like a Marvel movie to me, which is either to its credit or detriment. The only part that actually felt like Marvel was the post credit scenes. Still, there are cool CGI monsters and explosions and shit, so it is what it is. 

I thought Robb Stark was terrible in it. His character is one of the most important, but he just comes off as boring and aloof. If that part had been acted differently, then I think the entire movie would have worked a lot better. The timeline of the story telling also didn't work for me, either. I'm all for a non-linear narrative, but it just seems like it could have been cleaned up better and the story could have been told in a different way to make it more compelling. The jumping back and forth in time felt like a cheap device. There were a few other head shaking things in the plot that I won't spoil that I felt hurt the film too.

A couple of other comments... nothing against Angelina Jolie, but at this point, I see her and don't see the character she's playing. I just see Angelina Jolie.  Also, congrats to Marvel on make Salma Hayek look not hot. That was an achievement.

 

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atomheartbevo

atomheartbevo 89799

Posted
Posted
2 hours ago, Mitch Cumsteen said:

I feel like the production value on all the Marvel movies is so good, that the floor is pretty high for all of them as popcorn flicks, but character development was poor and the storyline didn't work that well. It never really felt like a Marvel movie to me, which is either to its credit or detriment.

Do you think it would have worked better as a 6-part TV series?  Because I feel like their story would have played out much better if we had a lot more time for character development and didn't jump around as much.  

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CooterBrown

CooterBrown 18029

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Do you think it would have worked better as a 6-part TV series?  Because I feel like their story would have played out much better if we had a lot more time for character development and didn't jump around as much.  

I felt like the director did about as well as she could with a dozen characters.

Should’ve been a prequel mini series on Disney+ to flesh out the characters and their backstory. End the series in a cliffhanger leading directly into the movie.

Instead, we were given about 2 hours of exposition cramming in all the background info before there was 30 minutes of actual movie.
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CooterBrown

CooterBrown 18029

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Some random things that stuck with me…

In every fight scene, Kumail Nanjiani looks like he’s about to start laughing. He can’t hold a straight face to save his life.

Also, why does he randomly get written out of the movie with 15 minutes left? It’s like they only had enough FX budget to include 4 of them in the uni mind so someone had to be cut loose.

I’m okay with them using ASL even though they’re using it 7,000 years before it existed. However, in 500 AD, she signs “watch” by pointing at a yet to be invented wrist watch. How did no one catch that?

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atomheartbevo

atomheartbevo 89799

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47 minutes ago, CooterBrown said:

In every fight scene, Kumail Nanjiani looks like he’s about to start laughing. He can’t hold a straight face to save his life.

Also, why does he randomly get written out of the movie with 15 minutes left?

He was trying to get as many of the motherfuckers as he could.

 

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MillerEP

MillerEP 30500

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Saw it tonight, it wasn’t bad. Slow at times but I think it’s because they needed to catch everyone up to speed on who these characters were since they’re not x-men or Spider-Man or whatever. Solid marvel movie that had it all, not the best but all in all pretty good and entertaining film.

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Tom

Tom 2959

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19 hours ago, Mitch Cumsteen said:

nothing against Angelina Jolie, but at this point, I see her and don't see the character she's playing. I just see Angelina Jolie.  

 

 

Agreed, but she's just not a good actress either.  Maybe she was a one point, but at least the last few things I've seen her in she plays Angelina Jolie.  Her default facial expression in most scenes, regardless of context, is like some blend of smug self-satisfaction and forced bedroom eyes.

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Rockethorn1978

Rockethorn1978 6102

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5 hours ago, MillerEP said:

Saw it tonight, it wasn’t bad. Slow at times but I think it’s because they needed to catch everyone up to speed on who these characters were since they’re not x-men or Spider-Man or whatever. Solid marvel movie that had it all, not the best but all in all pretty good and entertaining film.

Solid marvel movie? I can’t name a worse marvel movie I’ve ever seen than that one. 

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Chapo

Chapo 104

Posted
Posted

Just saw this, it was entertaining despite horrible acting (even for a comic book movie) and being way too long. 

Spoiler

Despite being surrounded by beautiful ladies, only the asshole dude gets to fuck a woman? One is stuck in an eternal bff, one is gay, one is a moody incel, and another is busy sucking his own d 

 

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CooterBrown

CooterBrown 18029

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Posted

The more I think about it, I don’t think they had a story when they wrote the script.

The entire plot is to stop a mountain from very, very slowly rising out of the Pacific. They stretched that to 20 minutes. Then the added 20 minutes of Deviants that could’ve been excised from the movie. They weren’t even related to the story or mattered at all other than to break up the talking with some action. Complete filler. The rest was the 2 hours of exposition giving background. 2 hours wasn’t even enough so they had to add a Star Wars text crawl at the beginning.

I think they had to scramble once Fiege showed it up on the Expo stage as a ‘21 release. They had no idea what they were going to do with it at that time.

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freyguy

freyguy 4289

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Posted

I enjoyed it, mainly based on my fears that they were going to try and forcefully intertwine Gaiman's interpretation of the whole thing.  That would have been way more awkward...Yeah it was long, but I like what they did.  The slow build that they too were recycled caretakers of this planet, (until it was time to flush everything down the commode and start it all over again), was a better twist than them being on earth and not knowing who eachother was after all these millenia.  Because they saved earth, they can now leave that storyline and work on the cosmic scale, rather than sticking around and being a bunch of invincible & immortal protectors of Earth.

I look at this movie the same way as when the first Thor movie came out.  It gives us a glimpse of what's next as they broaden the scope of the MCU.  I know a few of yall are getting hung up by your own political issues in how this movie was casted & written.  Get over yourself and grow up.  This is about to get way way Sci fi...

Very good to see them stay true to the Celestials.  Gives everything a much larger perspective.  Arashem's voice was perfect.  I now expect Galactus to be even better than that whenever he's introduced.  I could watch 10 movies about all that shit.

So they use this movie to also give you a glimpse of Black Night & Blade?  Ok...and what do Pip & Starfox have to do with all this?  A Celestial jailbreak?  Fuck only knows...but you can bet on it being a very large buildup..  I wonder if they'll try the Thanos resurrection arc.. 

Bottom line, I give it an A because of how well they fit this all in.

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Frieda’s Boss

Frieda’s Boss 181

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Posted

Finally saw this. I’ll give them credit for jamming a bunch into one movie. But overall this was pretty meh. Agreed with those that mentioned that this would have been perfect for D+ series. They had absolutely no need to go grab “names” for this project - in fact, I would say the “act persons” that I don’t know (Gil, the fast girl, even sersei) we’re more appealing than the names / people I recognized. Use D+ shows to make stars and then set up movies. 
 

This is on the lower tier of Marvel for me. Down with the first two Thor movies, IM2 and IM3, black widow, etc. 
 

Since no one is reading this thread anyway, I won’t spoiler it, but how does Blade fit in with Moon Knight?

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Dutch

Dutch 4479

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7 hours ago, Frieda’s Boss said:

Finally saw this. I’ll give them credit for jamming a bunch into one movie. But overall this was pretty meh. Agreed with those that mentioned that this would have been perfect for D+ series. They had absolutely no need to go grab “names” for this project - in fact, I would say the “act persons” that I don’t know (Gil, the fast girl, even sersei) we’re more appealing than the names / people I recognized. Use D+ shows to make stars and then set up movies. 
 

This is on the lower tier of Marvel for me. Down with the first two Thor movies, IM2 and IM3, black widow, etc. 
 

Since no one is reading this thread anyway, I won’t spoiler it, but how does Blade fit in with Moon Knight?

Spoiler

 

 

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Hmbre97

Hmbre97 6331

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Posted

This just released on Disney+ so gave it a watch. I can see why everyone says this would have been better as a series but I dunno, I feel like they are just using this movie to lay groundwork and wanted to get it out of the way. I dunno if I could have sat through 6+ hours of this plot line. I also think the Hawkeye series could have been condensed down into a 2 hour movie as well.  

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remoh

remoh 87

Posted
Posted (edited)

sang chi, black widow, and eternals. Lol.

 

It might be end of days for superhero flicks. Or at least we maybe finding the boundary of super hero films. 

if this boundary solidifies, maybe they’ll go back to making more original movies. 
 

or hollywood would double down and just keep rebooting the big names - iron man, capn america, wolverine.  
 

 

Edited by remoh
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Buzzrock

Buzzrock 14941

Posted
Posted
sang chi, black widow, and eternals. Lol.
 
It might be end of days for superhero flicks. Or at least we maybe finding the boundary of super hero films. 
if this boundary solidifies, maybe they’ll go back to making more original movies. 
 
or hollywood would double down and just keep rebooting the big names - iron man, capn america, wolverine.  
 
 

Shang Chi was good and Spider-Man just made $1B. Marvel is fine.
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