Bitch took my stuff again…Oh hi, Honey!

[Gatorubet 30431]

20% of the entire population of sock have holes chewed in them courtesy of the dogs.

Unless you are a hobo, socks with holes get tossed.

[SquishMitten 10466]

My FB account. She knows more about my friends and their kids than I do.

I’m failing to see the issue here

[Bullneck 19320]

1 hour ago, Gatorubet said:

Unless you are a hobo, socks with holes get tossed.

[After irth 1245]

On 7/1/2021 at 1:31 PM, InkaUtexas said:

T-shirts as well. And boxers. She likes to sleep in them at my place and then goes back to her place early in the morning for class. They never seem to make it back to my place.  

I would be ok with it...

[Trey3216 15381]

4 hours ago, Kennythetiger said:

“I need to use your phone to video this.  I am out of storage.”  

Only so many pictures of Pinterest recipes and home improvements to store on her phone.   

[Kennythetiger 9500]

1 hour ago, Trey3216 said:

Only so many pictures of Pinterest recipes and home improvements to store on her phone.   

Concert videos that she’ll never watch again. 

[Trey3216 15381]

12 minutes ago, Kennythetiger said:

Concert videos that she’ll never watch again. 

Those pop up in her Facebook memories on a yearly basis.  She just refuses to delete them from the phone.   

[tx ind 7014]

Never fails.  Go to my main toolbox for my tape measure and it’s gone. Have bought about a half dozen cheap ones specifically for her but mine always disappears. 

Obviously I should have had the foresight to look in her car for my tape measure because that’s where it was. Bonus- not sure if we’re buying furniture or there’s some project about to be dumped on me.

[Brothahorn 10088]

Never fails.  Go to my main toolbox for my tape measure and it’s gone. Have bought about a half dozen cheap ones specifically for her but mine always disappears. 

Obviously I should have had the foresight to look in her car for my tape measure because that’s where it was. Bonus- not sure if we’re buying furniture or there’s some project about to be dumped on me.

What is she measuring, dicks?

[NeverMarryAStripper 22035]

Yeah, pretty sure she was measuring her boy friend for comparison.

[ImissWallyPryor 9046]

On 6/30/2021 at 6:00 PM, tx ind said:

my iPhone charging cords just vanish

I had to strap my lightning cords to the power strips where I had my cords. God bless zip ties.

My daughters were the thieves, not my wife. 

[ImissWallyPryor 9046]

On 7/1/2021 at 11:53 AM, General Specific said:

Only if you want to stay out of prison! Mine leaves the top off after use. FML

Fun fact. Cockroaches like toothpaste. Tell your wife did that. Problem solved. 

[Incredulity 11717]

5 hours ago, ImissWallyPryor said:

Fun fact. Cockroaches like toothpaste. Tell your wife did that. Problem solved. 

That’s it we are moving 

[General Specific 3375]

Fun fact. Cockroaches like toothpaste. Tell your wife did that. Problem solved. 

Try telling your wife something and report back.

[ABSR 5328]

47 minutes ago, General Specific said:

Try telling your wife something and report back.

You need to get any random person off the street such as a homeless guy, a guy with a sandwich board standing on the corner, or an unknown person on the internet to tell this to her.  You should then act incredulous about the "fact", and that way she will adopt it as the gospel truth that you can never convince her is incorrect.

This is wife level 3 stuff - "Managing the marriage so you get to 'death do us part' without being the one killing someone."

Level 1 is 'Honeymoon' phase also called "You're an idiot".

Level 2 is 'We are Partners' phase where you believe you can rationally discuss and work with her to solve issues.  Also known as "You're still and idiot".

[NeverMarryAStripper 22035]

5 minutes ago, ABSR said:

Level 1 is 'Honeymoon' phase also called "You're an idiot".

Level 2 is 'We are Partners' phase where you believe you can rationally discuss and work with her to solve issues.  Also known as "You're still and idiot".

Level 3 is "Divorce" phase also called "I can't believe I was such an idiot"

[General Specific 3375]

You need to get any random person off the street such as a homeless guy, a guy with a sandwich board standing on the corner, or an unknown person on the internet to tell this to her.  You should then act incredulous about the "fact", and that way she will adopt it as the gospel truth that you can never convince her is incorrect.
This is wife level 3 stuff - "Managing the marriage so you get to 'death do us part' without being the one killing someone."
Level 1 is 'Honeymoon' phase also called "You're an idiot".
Level 2 is 'We are Partners' phase where you believe you can rationally discuss and work with her to solve issues.  Also known as "You're still and idiot".

You left off 3.a; lot and lots of marriage counseling, aka “You’re an idiot”.

[General Specific 3375]

Level 3 is "Divorce" phase also called "I can't believe I was such an idiot"

Nope, that’s Level 4, fuck around and find out!