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2022 Transfer Thread - It's the End of the World As We Know It (And I Feel Fine)

closetojumping

By closetojumping
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Mr Shrimp Unlimited
Mr Shrimp Unlimited

God fucking damnit motherfucker. I've been happily lurking on this board for years but your disgusting fucking verbal flatulence about "but but but he's winner and he hurt his thumb :(" have forced me

closetojumping
closetojumping

Texas and Oregon put the CFB world on tilt with their respective NIL efforts. Many alumni bases are reacting pragmatically and trying to build something competitive of their own that fits their specif

immamac
immamac

Color me surprised that people promising NIL as enticement have not followed through at all and those who have done everything by the book have set expectations that will be met.  It's almost lik

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Doc Reeves

Doc Reeves 6434

Posted
Posted
25 minutes ago, Hook1997 said:

Have we found any linebackers yet or talking to any?  Back to mutilated dick talk, don’t believe it, there’s no way he had 7 piercings and split his dick and has no scars.

Hey man, no offense taken when you’re reading a story on the internet. All I can do is assure you its all very real and true. 

 

*tiny more detail if you’re interested 

Spoiler

He didn’t necessarily split his dick like when you over cook a hotdog on the grill. The piercing was torn out but the actual piece of jewelry had a safety built in case of this very fear. So first it tore and enlarged the two actual piercing holes in his guy before it failed and part was pulled through the bottom and tore into the top bar-bell. The one right below the bell wasn’t bad at all but the other one under the frenulum was a large rip longways, dead center that he said looked about the width of  the tip of his finger. Doesn’t sound big but when you account for shrinkage, well, there’s  no kidding yourself about how bad it was. 

Now, it’s been a long time so I don’t quite remember exactly why but his gf knew to put in another piercing back into the injury. For some reason that stopped the bleeding until they could get to his piercing shop (not the hospital). The part I remember is him telling me it was so painful he passed out. 

As for the scars, man I don’t know what to say. I made many comments about how most people who hurt themselves because they are stupid have some sort of consequence for their shit. He skewers his junk like a madman and then takes mangled member into a dick plastic surgeon who rebuilds it and gives it a face lift.

He just laughes and tells me how he never knew that Houston was such a hub for dick plastic surgeons.

 

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RollLeft

RollLeft 5092

Posted
Posted
8 hours ago, MIkeHoncho said:

can we get a Thujone diagram of this?  Unless it was like an 8 inch belly button ring, how the fuck did it get caught on his PA while she was sliding off?  Had to be some other weird shenanigans going on.  Where was the monkey during this?  Was a doctor of the neighborhood called? 

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Hiphopopotamos

Hiphopopotamos 21192

Posted
Posted (edited)
11 minutes ago, texifornia said:

Well that's one way to spell Xavier

 

Fun fact - his name was originally spelled 'Xzavea', but they added the 'u' to help people pronounce it correctly.  It is not pronounced like 'Xavier', but rather 'X-Zah-vee-A'.  

Edited by Hiphopopotamos
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Doc Reeves

Doc Reeves 6434

Posted
Posted
4 minutes ago, IDIOTsavant said:

I was surprised you only had the one typo typing with one hand.

Do you think I’m an animal?

Sir, I’ll have you know I have the dignity to take a screenshot so I can look at it later in the bathroom where I can set my phone on the counter and use both hands one to jerk my junk on the other to stick my finger in my ass.

Typos are just because I’m stupid.

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Bevo

Bevo 13933

Posted
Posted
26 minutes ago, Doc Reeves said:

Do you think I’m an animal?

Sir, I’ll have you know I have the dignity to take a screenshot so I can look at it later in the bathroom where I can set my phone on the counter and use both hands one to jerk my junk on the other to stick my finger in my ass.

Typos are just because I’m stupid.

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Chuckie Finster

Chuckie Finster 23103

Posted
Posted
OU offers Micaiah Overton, unheralded portal DT from Liberty and brother of Lebbeus Overton, DL reclassifying from 2023 to 2022. Dad played OL at OU in the 1990. Dad worked at A&M when the kids were growing up, and they live in Georgia now. UGa and A&M lead.
https://twitter.com/micaiah_overton/status/1492209911996026885

If y’all can’t afford the move to the SEC, ain’t no way y’all are gonna outbid aggy here.
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quigley

quigley 1565

Posted
Posted (edited)
1 hour ago, Chuckie Finster said:


If y’all can’t afford the move to the SEC, ain’t no way y’all are gonna outbid aggy here.

"NIL"/bag-man money and conference payout money are really different. They come from different pots of money and are on a different scale and timeframe.

My understanding is that OU's comfortable delaying the move to the SEC because of money and because now the Sooners want to get their roster in order prior to the move. Re NIL/bags, I think OU's offer here and behavior with other recruits indicate that the Sooners are going to the Clemson model of pushing religiosity and paying players/families.

The Overton family has ties to all three of UGa, A&M, and OU. Of the other two, Ohio St makes sense because of Larry Johnson's track record, and they pay their players.

If money is a primary determinant, Oregon is the team to look out for. Lanning was LB coach at UGa so I doubt (someone please correct me if I'm wrong) he (Lanning) would've been Overton's primary recruiter. Oregon and Lanning could use another top DL recruit to be the face of their otherwise nondescript class (#25 overall, no players in the top 100).

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Codaxx

Codaxx 6274

Posted
Posted
On 2/11/2022 at 4:24 PM, quigley said:

OU offers Micaiah Overton, unheralded portal DT from Liberty and brother of Lebbeus Overton, DL reclassifying from 2023 to 2022. Dad played OL at OU in the 1990. Dad worked at A&M when the kids were growing up, and they live in Georgia now. UGa and A&M lead.

https://twitter.com/micaiah_overton/status/1492209911996026885

I just hope the Brother at Liberty kids A&M or OU and the 5 star goes somewhere else. Texas is  it in it, so that is the only thing that would bring me joy

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