Airplane Etiquette Thread

[Brisketexan 105069]

1 minute ago, HouTex said:

It’s distressing to hear an adult cry and whimper for three hours.

What, are you a virgin?

[TXSooner518 2438]

4 minutes ago, WBT said:

That one pisses me off too.  My backpack takes up less space than your suitcase with 1/3 of your earthly possessions but I'm the problem?  If everyone would check their enormous fucking rolling bags we could all be off an on in 5 minutes.

Of course, the airlines with their bag check bullshit fees contribute. I booked a RT flight to Vegas on SWA. Then two weeks out, I needed to adjust the return leg. Could stay on SWA and leave at 6a and pay $180 more or go on AA and leave at 730a and pay $15 more. Obv choice. I had a rolling bag that is the biggest allowed carry-on. If I was still on SWA I would have checked it on the way home (I carried on going to Vegas b/c I was in a hurry to get to a tourney). But since AA wants $30 from me to check it, fuck it, I'm carrying it on. 

And OP is obv 10000% correct here. 

[DFWTexEx 276]

3 hours ago, Zepol87 said:

 What the fuck? I have never even thought of asking another passenger to move seats, is that a thing?

It's definitely a thing, especially entitled parents who don't plan ahead.

[faps 806]

1 hour ago, Surly Bevo said:

Since airlines (at our behest mind you) have turned using their service into a mostly no frills, shitty transportation experience just a step or two above hopping in the back of a C-130 people should view it as such. 

I think I wouldn't mind flying C-130 airlines. Pull up to the gate and just open the rear cargo door. It'd clear out faster than the planes do now.

I'd pay extra if it would fly over my actual destination and let me jump out with a parachute.

[Jerry Callo 8698]

3 minutes ago, TXSooner518 said:

Of course, the airlines with their bag check bullshit fees contribute.

Make checked bags free and charge for overhead compartment carry-ons . . . problem solved.

[tigol 2395]

38 minutes ago, 956 Worldwide said:

FA shoulda thrown the seat stealers off the plane. 
 

Also, I am all for less of a stigma around mental illness but shit it is a beating to be around people who are constantly requesting accommodations for some ephemeral bullshit problem you claim to have. Assholes throw that down like a trump card to get what they want and to void social contracts. 

I have an anxiety disorder.  I seriously doubt these seat stealers had one.  I would be more fucking anxious anticipating a confrontation over a seat that I had stolen as opposed to sitting in my own seat or quietly asking the gate attendant for a seat change prior to boarding.  These were attention whores claiming they have a mental illness.  They do nothing but fuck up the perception of anxiety for people like me.  Fuck 'em.

[956 Worldwide 34702]

3 hours ago, Onboard 2.0 said:

If you put a seat defender on the seat in front of you we have nothing to talk about....civilly that is.  

Yeah fuck her. She wants more room, move.  You were fine right where you were.  You always want to be polite, but she for damn sure wasn't reciprocating IMO.

And... transatlantic flight you say ?  Yeah yer 1%.....

The recline functions exist. Use it, but there are rules for not being an asshole.

1. Recline slowly and steadily, don’t throw your body weight into the chair. 
2. Pull the seat back up during meal service and leave it there until they come and take the trash. Don’t make the person behind you try to eat with a tray in their nuts and a headrest at nose level.

[The Other White Meat 39]

Booked a flight a while back and at some point it got rescheduled. I was aware of this but on the day of the flight I spaced and had the original (later) flight time in my head. Showed up in time for the original flight but not for the actual flight. Plane was still there but was told it was too late to board. Said no problem, my mistake, what can you get me on? Next available was leaving at midnight. Thanked her and let her do her thing. Almost finished, she thanks me for being so patient and understanding. I said that it was my mistake, why would I get mad at her and be an ass. She just looked at me and said "Everyone else does."

[Buzzrock 14902]

Each assigned/purchased seat could have a different value. Randomly plopping into a vacant one is considered company theft if worth more and is a felony offense...like tampering with a mailbox.

One of my favorite negotiations was with a relatively new procurement person at a large airline. I was discussing pricing my solution based on the value to said airline, and he curtly informed me that my product should be priced based on cost plus a reasonable margin.

I asked him why the exact same plane seat can demand a wide range of price depending on who buys and when it’s purchased.

He moved me to a different procurement person. Got the deal.

[Celery Man 20932]

3 hours ago, elfenix said:

i hope someone smashed your backpack with the wheels they just dragged through the dirtiest airport bathroom in america. 

[RollLeft 5040]

59 minutes ago, Underdog said:

On our recent trip to and from Dallas, we were pleasantly surprised how people just didn't immediately unfasten their seatbelts and jump up to retrieve their overhead luggage, seems a majority of people were patient.  

 

 

I love it when that one idiot is up and ready to go only to look around and realize that everyone else is still sitting waiting to get up in order of row.  Sit down dumbass.

[South Austin 52454]

1 hour ago, Underdog said:

On our recent trip to and from Dallas, we were pleasantly surprised how people just didn't immediately unfasten their seatbelts and jump up to retrieve their overhead luggage, seems a majority of people were patient. 

Same here on my trip to New Orleans last weekend.  Passengers were pretty patient and waited in their seats until shortly before the row in front of them started to head off the plane.  And security lines in ABIA on the way out and New Orleans on the way back were a breeze, so maybe that helped with our collective mood on the plane.

[Covri 6244]

3 hours ago, mdmost said:

I don't understand what it is about airplanes that turns people into miserable, entitled weirdos (not OP). Was she just wanting to spread out, like sleep across all 3 seats? Yeah, that's on her to move if she wants no one on the aisle. 

I was thinking that too at first, but OP said it was a 2-4-2 configuration so he was sitting with her in one of the 2 seat sections and his family had 3 out of 4 in the 4 seat section. 
 

Still out of line for her to ask someone to move instead of volunteering to move herself first.

[956 Worldwide 34702]

4 minutes ago, RollLeft said:

I love it when that one idiot is up and ready to go only to look around and realize that everyone else is still sitting waiting to get up in order of row.  Sit down dumbass.

I once found myself on a gastarbeiter flight between Uzbekistan and a medium sized Russian city. Some of the dudes had never been on a plane before. They tried that shit and the Russian FAs went apeshit on their asses.  Most of them were cute women but damn, they were not to be tripled with. Then they walked around the plane and escorted the babushkas, anyone else who looked “Russian” (and me) down the jetway before letting the masses of Uzbek laborers off. 

[RollLeft 5040]

4 hours ago, Celery Man said:

dude on a swa flight got salty with me because i had my backpack in the overhead, saying it was for luggage not backpacks...

 

48 minutes ago, WBT said:

That one pisses me off too.  My backpack takes up less space than your suitcase with 1/3 of your earthly possessions but I'm the problem?  If everyone would check their enormous fucking rolling bags we could all be off an on in 5 minutes.

 

This would piss me off also.  There is nothing wrong with backpacks in the overhead bin...

 

 

when you are 19.  Grow up and get a satchel(messenger bag);)

[mdmost 42999]

4 minutes ago, Covri said:

I was thinking that too at first, but OP said it was a 2-4-2 configuration so he was sitting with her in one of the 2 seat sections and his family had 3 out of 4 in the 4 seat section. 
 

Still out of line for her to ask someone to move instead of volunteering to move herself first.

You know, I completely missed that detail of it being 2 across. If it's between an aisle seat with my kid or an aisle seat with some stranger, I'd opt for the family one but I get the OP rolled the dice and didn't think he'd get someone next to him. So yeah, he could move. He doesn't have to move. If it bothers the lady so much then she should move. 

[Telegraph_it 3357]

The poster that mentioned having their backpack in the overhead reminded me of the most rage inducing moment on a plane for me. 
 

I was sitting in the row behind first, bulkhead seat, so I had my backup in the overhead. Almost everyone has boarded and the overhead directly above me, where my bag is stowed, is closed. Guy comes up from a few rows back and starts opening the compartments. He comes to the one over my row and removes my bag, raises it up, and asks whose bag this is. 
 

I take my AirPods out and immediately respond, “it’s mine and I’d appreciate it if you put it right back.”
 

He is looking down at me and says something about backpacks not belonging in overheads and puts his duffel in my place. 
 

Thankfully, a flight attendant is right there and immediately pounces on the dude demanding he remove his bag or he is off the flight. 
 

He take his bag down and in the process lands it on my head. I stand up at this point ready to go but a rather large passaneger a row back is already up in his face yelling at him. The dude got kicked off the flight. 

[Celery Man 20932]

5 minutes ago, RollLeft said:

 

 

This would piss me off also.  There is nothing wrong with backpacks in the overhead bin...

 

 

when you are 19.  Grow up and get a satchel(messenger bag);)

Tusting Marston for my business papers, North Face whatever for the whites if it's quick and I get to dress like a tech guy.

 

My favorite seat switch thing was an Air Moldova flight from Rome to Chishinau en route to Moscow. Wife was pissed because someone was sitting in her aisle seat, some babushka looking at me very intently. When I gave her a quizzical look and showed her my ticket, she pantomimed "I'm fucking deathly afraid of flying please don't make me sit next to the window" and it was a great moment in busting through the language barrier. Took me longer to explain to my wife what was happening than it did for her to get her point across. Wife just didn't want to be in the middle, so no problem.

[956 Worldwide 34702]

14 minutes ago, mdmost said:

You know, I completely missed that detail of it being 2 across. If it's between an aisle seat with my kid or an aisle seat with some stranger, I'd opt for the family one but I get the OP rolled the dice and didn't think he'd get someone next to him. So yeah, he could move. He doesn't have to move. If it bothers the lady so much then she should move. 

Key difference here is that the extra seat on that middle row of four is valuable real estate. I rolled the dice when checking in online that our family of four would end up with one or two empty seats next to us. We ended up with one. She wanted me to move into it so that she could have an empty seat next to her, instead of the wife and two kids having an extra seat next to them. They were quite comfortable, which was exactly what I was aiming for. Sorry, I chose these seats for my comfort not yours. 
 

Also, the wife was quite gruntled about getting an extra seat in her row with kids— not about to shut that down to make some rando happy.

Edited July 6, 2021 by 956 Worldwide

[Gatorubet 30185]

FA shoulda thrown the seat stealers off the plane. 
 

Like I’m gonna risk a bite from a service dog.

[Brisketexan 105069]

3 minutes ago, Gatorubet said:

Like I’m gonna risk a bite from a service peacock.

FIF insane Americans.

[BearSchlong 8083]

1 hour ago, HouTex said:

The people that are really scared of flying just shouldn’t fly. We were on one of my kid’s spring break trips to Mexico, or maybe the Bahamas, and a woman in her late 20s directly behind us whimpered and cried the entire flight. She just could not settle down. Her young husband or boyfriend tried to console her but nothing would help. It’s distressing to hear an adult cry and whimper for three hours.

My wife + Xanax. Problem easily solved.

1 hour ago, WBT said:

That one pisses me off too.  My backpack takes up less space than your suitcase with 1/3 of your earthly possessions but I'm the problem?  If everyone would check their enormous fucking rolling bags we could all be off an on in 5 minutes.

One of the many reasons I prefer SWA is because bags fly free. I refuse to carry anything larger than my somewhat compact Tumi backpack on an airplane.

Skycap lives matter too.

[52-80 19147]

5 hours ago, Zepol87 said:

 What the fuck? I have never even thought of asking another passenger to move seats, is that a thing?

worse, some people preemptively take OTHER people's assigned seats, and when/if confronted, have the temerity to suggest that the rightful occupant sit somewhere else.

 

this happened to my wife once - and she being a non-confrontational person just sat somewhere else.  when she told me the story, i was livid beyond belief.

 

that said, once or twice i half-mindedly sat in the wrong seat, so hopefully nobody thought i was being an intentional poacher.

[Lat22 4010]

I perfected my "don't you dare fucking talk to me" snarl on airplanes.  Everybody needs to have one.

[baboso 6054]

Several years ago on an AA flight from DFW to DCA.  Work trip with colleagues and we had a window and aisle seat on the MD88 (configuration is 3 seats on one side, 2 seats on the other, we were in the 3 seat side).  So, we're sitting there, shooting evil thoughts at oncoming pax hoping we keep an empty middle seat.  Hot chick gets on, we're like yes, yes, yes, please.  No luck, she sits one row forward and across the aisle.  Up comes this fat fuck stops at our row, we are saying fuck my life but he sits directly across the aisle behind the hot chick.  Finish boarding, keep our empty middle, sweet!

Taxiing out and the fat dude takes out his Dallas Morning News and proceeds to hold it up in front of him to read, as he can't fit it between his gut and the hot chick's seat.  Problem is every time he turns the page, he kind of snaps it and is hitting the hot chick in the back of the head.  After 2 or 3 smacks, we could see her getting more and more irritated.  Finally, on about the 10th smack, she turns around and says would you please quit hitting me in the head with your paper.  He harumphs but adjusts somehow so the paper swatting is finished.  We take off and fat boy gets up by grabbing the top of her headrest to pull himself up and pulls her hair, eliciting a pained ouch from her.  He apologizes and then proceeds to open the overhead bin and rummage around in it while his big gut is rubbing on her shoulder and head.  She looks disgusted and is grabbing the armrest and leaning as far away from him as she can get.  About that time, a laptop bag comes tumbling out of the overhead and lands on her hand and she just loses it and screams, "YOU FAT MOTHERFUCKER, WHY ARE YOU PERSECUTING ME?"  He yells back he hasn't done anything wrong and she can't call him fat.  "YOU ARE FAT!  AND, YOU HAVE BEEN MAKING THIS FLIGHT MISERABLE FOR ME!"

My buddy and I are cracking up.  Flight attendants show up, referee the argument, and end up moving the hot chick to first class.  Fat dude is really pissed that he didn't get moved to the front of the plane.  We're disappointed also.

[Onboard 2.0 9083]

1 hour ago, 956 Worldwide said:

The recline functions exist. Use it, but there are rules for not being an asshole.

1. Recline slowly and steadily, don’t throw your body weight into the chair. 
2. Pull the seat back up during meal service and leave it there until they come and take the trash. Don’t make the person behind you try to eat with a tray in their nuts and a headrest at nose level.

Airline courtesy.  It's what separates us from the animals...

[mininghorn88 2277]

I fly a lot and most of it is international travel.  Based upon my flying status I am usually one of the first to board.  I make sure to get my seat and area all set up claiming my space.

I closely monitor the seating chart jockeying for the best seating.  I always request an aisle seat.  If I see that the row that I am sitting in is empty (particularly if it is a middle row) then I will sit in one of the vacant seats adjacent to mine to discourage anyone else doing it in hopes to secure a bit of extra space.

[BearSchlong 8083]

50 minutes ago, Lat22 said:

I perfected my "don't you dare fucking talk to me" snarl on airplanes.  Everybody needs to have one.

Normally I am friendly AF, and love talking to strangers, even on airplanes, and I love dogs.

But one day I was in a monumentally anti-social bad mood. SWA boarding group A1.  Sat down on the first row bulkhead aisle seat, headphones on, eyes closed. At some point someone took the window seat but didn't disturb me.

Then the last guy to board was a overly talkative older guy with a dog that wasn't on a leash or in a carrier.  I shit you not, I had seen him in the terminal and made the mental note to avoid him and doggo. I gave him that look.

He says "you don't mind if i sit here, do you. . .ok, haha haha hahah guess not" and visibly recoiled a little bit, and he and the dog moved on to find another seat.

I almost apologized, but I was awestruck at how a guy gets through security and on a plane with a dog without a leash or carrier.

edit - especially having an unrestrained dog in the bulkhead row, just seems kinda weird, right?

Edited July 6, 2021 by BearSchlong

[BearSchlong 8083]

6 minutes ago, mininghorn88 said:

 I will sit in one of the vacant seats adjacent to mine to discourage anyone else doing it in hopes to secure a bit of extra space.

themoreyouknow.gif

[gmr548 16576]

This.  And certainly don't be in my seat before I'm in it forcing me to make a stink with you.  Especially don't ask me to move from an aisle seat to a middle seat so your kid can be across the aisle from you and then try and get loud when I say no.  Plan better or suck it up.

Had the second part ever happened? The overwhelmingly obvious and mutually agreeable situation is to simply swap aisle seats. That’s such a phenomenally dumb request I’m not sure how I’d handle it.

[burns_312 353]

Flying next week and haven’t flown commercially since Covid started, do buffs cover the requirement of a mask or will I need one of those regular dumbass masks?


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[956 Worldwide 34702]

5 minutes ago, burns_312 said:

Flying next week and haven’t flown commercially since Covid started, do buffs cover the requirement of a mask or will I need one of those regular dumbass masks?


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

I don’t know where you’re going but transatlantic on Lufthansa they wanted a surgical mask or N95.

[burns_312 353]

I don’t know where you’re going but transatlantic on Lufthansa they wanted a surgical mask or N95.

Western KS to central SD.


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[DFWTexEx 276]

27 minutes ago, burns_312 said:

Flying next week and haven’t flown commercially since Covid started, do buffs cover the requirement of a mask or will I need one of those regular dumbass masks?


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I don't believe that will work, but it may depend on the airline.   American Airlines expressly states, even in the announcements, that gaiters, buffs and bandanas are not acceptable.  They have regular masks for you if that's all you have.   The announcement does refer to them as "douchey bro buffs".  Makes me laugh every time.

[UTPhil2006 3805]

52 minutes ago, gmr548 said:

Had the second part ever happened? The overwhelmingly obvious and mutually agreeable situation is to simply swap aisle seats. That’s such a phenomenally dumb request I’m not sure how I’d handle it.

About a month ago. Like tried to shame me into giving up my seat by saying I wasn’t letting his kid who was right in front of him middle seat sit with his family. Kept trying to get louder with it until the FA told him to stop. Like bro you trying to make me look bad by not switching out of my aisle seat implies that I care what any of the passengers think

[RollLeft 5040]

2 hours ago, Gatorubet said:

Like I’m gonna risk a bite from a service dog.

This is a whole other topic.  "Service" dogs are very well trained and i would be shocked if they bit anyone.  I'm pro Service animal.   The law protects them.

Emotional Support animals on the other hand are normal pets posing as Service dogs with their fake garments and badges.  Stolen valor i say.  The owners should be shamed.  Something like 90% of ESA's are captives of mental midgets, Karen's and other wack job types.  If the dog is leading the owner, jumping around and or barking it ain't no Service animal.   The law does not protect any of these fakes.

Edited July 6, 2021 by RollLeft

[burns_312 353]

I don't believe that will work, but it may depend on the airline.   American Airlines expressly states, even in the announcements, that gaiters, buffs and bandanas are not acceptable.  They have regular masks for you if that's all you have.   The announcement does refer to them as "douchey bro buffs".  Makes me laugh every time.

Masks in general make me laugh but that’s a different story for a different thread.


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[Gil Bang 25920]

GF's mom and brother come to visit once a year, from South Florida.  

I always book their flights, and I always do the window-aisle thing on the 3-3 configuration.  9 times out of 10, the middle seat stays empty.  On the rare occasion that it's booked, they ask the middle seat guy if he'd prefer the window or aisle, and they take the middle so they are sitting next to each other.  

Of course, middle seat guy always wants to move. 

 

[956 Worldwide 34702]

2 hours ago, Gil Bang said:

GF's mom and brother come to visit once a year, from South Florida.  

I always book their flights, and I always do the window-aisle thing on the 3-3 configuration.  9 times out of 10, the middle seat stays empty.  On the rare occasion that it's booked, they ask the middle seat guy if he'd prefer the window or aisle, and they take the middle so they are sitting next to each other.  

Of course, middle seat guy always wants to move. 

 

Why do they ask to move?  I’d rather have an aisle (especially aisle) or window seat than sit in the middle regardless of what family member I might be separated from. I’ll see them at the jetway.

[Guest]

On 7/6/2021 at 10:20 AM, Zepol87 said:

 What the fuck? I have never even thought of asking another passenger to move seats, is that a thing?

entitled pieces of shit on a plane?  Yeah.  All the fucking time... The overhead bins expose that horseshit as well as any other aspect of travel.

That lady should have moved to another aisle or STFU.

[midtown 3345]

I carry a 40L "backpack".  My kids carry 30L's.  They do not fit under the seat.   They are not school size back packs they are luggage.  I once had someone ask me if I could put my backpack under my seat.   I just laughed and I said "That's a 40L pack"  And it does not fit under the seat.   So they asked the FA.   She confirmed it was staying in the overhead.

 

The rule on switching seats is simple.  First of all you have to offer an even trade.   Isle for isle etc.  Window for  window.  etc  And has to be close like a row or two.  Or the counter flyer should receive a better row etc.  Asking someone is row 12 to move to 22 is off limits.   And asking  anyone to sit by a fat person is an instant DK.    If the answer is no.   The answer is no.

[Carl Spackler 3479]

On 7/6/2021 at 3:28 PM, DFWTexEx said:

I don't believe that will work, but it may depend on the airline.   American Airlines expressly states, even in the announcements, that gaiters, buffs and bandanas are not acceptable.  They have regular masks for you if that's all you have.   The announcement does refer to them as "douchey bro buffs".  Makes me laugh every time.

Same with Southwest.

[conVINCEd 21469]

I’m normally a dipper, but when I have to hop on a plane I grab a pouch of Levi Garrett and stick an empty 1L water bottle in my backpack.  I load up prior to taxiing.  That tends to insure that nobody chooses to sit next to me.

[burns_312 353]

I’m normally a dipper, but when I have to hop on a plane I grab a pouch of Levi Garrett and stick an empty 1L water bottle in my backpack.  I load up prior to taxiing.  That tends to insure that nobody chooses to sit next to me.

With the price of Levi Garrett today, you may be better off flying private.


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[RollLeft 5040]

On 7/6/2021 at 4:10 PM, baboso said:

Several years ago on an AA flight from DFW to DCA.  Work trip with colleagues and we had a window and aisle seat on the MD88 (configuration is 3 seats on one side, 2 seats on the other, we were in the 3 seat side).  So, we're sitting there, shooting evil thoughts at oncoming pax hoping we keep an empty middle seat.  Hot chick gets on, we're like yes, yes, yes, please.  No luck, she sits one row forward and across the aisle.  Up comes this fat fuck stops at our row, we are saying fuck my life but he sits directly across the aisle behind the hot chick.  Finish boarding, keep our empty middle, sweet!

Taxiing out and the fat dude takes out his Dallas Morning News and proceeds to hold it up in front of him to read, as he can't fit it between his gut and the hot chick's seat.  Problem is every time he turns the page, he kind of snaps it and is hitting the hot chick in the back of the head.  After 2 or 3 smacks, we could see her getting more and more irritated.  Finally, on about the 10th smack, she turns around and says would you please quit hitting me in the head with your paper.  He harumphs but adjusts somehow so the paper swatting is finished.  We take off and fat boy gets up by grabbing the top of her headrest to pull himself up and pulls her hair, eliciting a pained ouch from her.  He apologizes and then proceeds to open the overhead bin and rummage around in it while his big gut is rubbing on her shoulder and head.  She looks disgusted and is grabbing the armrest and leaning as far away from him as she can get.  About that time, a laptop bag comes tumbling out of the overhead and lands on her hand and she just loses it and screams, "YOU FAT MOTHERFUCKER, WHY ARE YOU PERSECUTING ME?"  He yells back he hasn't done anything wrong and she can't call him fat.  "YOU ARE FAT!  AND, YOU HAVE BEEN MAKING THIS FLIGHT MISERABLE FOR ME!"

My buddy and I are cracking up.  Flight attendants show up, referee the argument, and end up moving the hot chick to first class.  Fat dude is really pissed that he didn't get moved to the front of the plane.  We're disappointed also.

A few years back on a 787 (3-3-3) flight to Houston from Frankfurt I was seated in an aisle seat and mso was in the window seat.  We left it to chance as to who would be seated between us. 

Next thing you know a 400lb fatty walks in the cabin.  Naturally, i closed my eyes and hoped for the best.  Well, we lucked out.  He was in section ABC a few rows up while we were in seats GHI two rows back and over.  Relief!   

Well, a few minutes later an even larger fatty, 450lb+, walks in and i'm thinking "No fucking way.  Just my luck."  At that moment, I prepped for what i expected to be the longest 12 hr flight ever.   Nope, we lucked out again!

Then the unthinkable happened.  New fatty was seated in the middle seat right next to original fatty.  I was in shock! My inward reaction was that the whole situation was just wrong.  I couldn't believe my eyes.  I caught the FA eyes and gave her the raised eyebrow/wtf look.  Again, i just couldn't believe this was really happening.  

These two rotund beings probably woke up that morning dreading sitting next to a normal person, hoping to sit next to a child, only to find their doppelganger on a transatlantic flight.  HA!!!

It was like a trainwreck.  I couldn't turn away.  I must have stared at these two for 3 of 12 hours during that flight.  It was a marvel to behold.  I just kept thinking how miserable and uncomfortable they must be.  They overflowed into each other and each were leaning the opposite way while still fully rubbed up into each other.  Did i mention that they closed the doors and the seat between us remained empty.  I knew that at some point this would not stand and something would transpire.  Sure enough around hour 7 i hear "That's It!". Next thing i see is these two fatties in a verbal spat, though not facing each other, involved in full fat elbow war.  It was the most hilarious thing i have ever seen on a plane.    

I don't know how either of them didn't leave that flight hating fat people.  The irony!       

[gmr548 16576]

Isle for isle etc.

I’d think two people who can swap islands are probably flying private

[Sam Lin 3551]

2 hours ago, midtown said:

The rule on switching seats is simple.  First of all you have to offer an even trade.   Isle for isle etc.  Window for  window.  etc  And has to be close like a row or two.  Or the counter flyer should receive a better row etc.  Asking someone is row 12 to move to 22 is off limits.   And asking  anyone to sit by a fat person is an instant DK.    If the answer is no.   The answer is no.

This, it's pretty basic. No means no, stfu about it.

And never sit in the goddamn person's seat before you ask! That's an instant no if I see someone already presumptively occupying my seat. Wait until they arrive to their seat, and ask before they get all stowed and settled in.

I've been on both sides of this - follow the rules above and unless I'm next to family I'll usually swap. There are times where I've NOT been asked but clearly seen a couple get split up next to me and offered my seat to them so they could sit together. There have been plenty of times where I couldn't select seats next to family where I was the one asking.

In general, be respectful and respectable, and others are usually the same in return. I'm probably 90% success rate asking, but I follow the rules above and am always offering a better seat.

[956 Worldwide 34702]

On 7/6/2021 at 12:10 PM, RDCanecutter said:

When I sit next to Intently-Working-On-A-Laptop Guy, I figure, now there's a feller who's stressed, he could use a little levity. So I ask him if he's seen some funny computer videos, like that boy who likes turtles, or maybe that squirrel that turns around all dramatic-like.

If he doesn't answer, I just figure well hey, that there feller is stressed AND shy, the work has got him down. So let's help him finish the work?

They say two heads are better than one, and everything gets better by the second draft, so I lean in kinda unobtrusive-like, and read (in a very low voice so I don't distract him) whatever he's workin on, and when I read something where he's gone all wrongly on grammar, well of course I step in with a "HEY," and I just point to the screen. I don't tell him what's wrong, I just go "HEY," and then he can have that Ah-Hah moment of seein it himself because it is his job to fix it after all. I just helped a little.

 

On airplanes, I find that since we are all so close and can’t go anywhere, you should pass the time by talking. But some people are nervous so I always break the ice.

So the guy on a laptop, he really likes his work and it’s important to him. So I ask a lot of questions about his job and what he’s working on. Or if I see a lady is flying alone with kids, I ask her where her husband is and why he’s not on the trip.  And if someone looks like they might not be American or speak good English, I make sure to repeat all the safety announcements real slow and loud so they understand, then give them a little pop quiz on what to do if we crash— just to make sure they feel safe.

You have to notice the small things about people, meet them where they are so to speak. 

[Sam Lin 3551]

Dude, just fart a lot. Social Farting.

[CooterBrown 18003]

It's definitely a thing, especially entitled parents who don't plan ahead.

I did ask to change on my last flight. Booked two Comfort+ seats, side by side, on Delta. I was flying with just my 8 YO in tow. Those fuckers split our seats on both legs going to USVI. First leg wasn’t a problem since we were given aisle seats next to each other. But on the second leg, they put us 8 aisles apart. WTF. I didn’t notice it on check in because I upgraded in order to pick my seats. why did I upgrade to select my seats if you’re not going to honor it? And is your system too stupid to recognize one passenger was a child?