Stupid crap you did when you were a kid

[Baboontyme 2,882]

I could write a journal, check that, a book. Actually, more like a novel. Honestly probably more like a Bible. 

Stole parents car nightly at 14 to pick up girls and drive to the most dangerous parts of Detroit for fun. Had copies of the keys so they were clueless. That was fun until we flooded the car by driving through...a flood. Then I did it again after getting caught, having to work off $600 damage I did to the car. Got caught again.

Originated a department store scam that bankrolled thousands of dollars in car stereo equipment.

Lit a friend's hair on fire trying to create a homemade firework of sorts with a model rocket, magnesium, and of course gasoline. Almost blew up a car in the process.

Homemade pipe bomb in a glass container with gunpowder. The fuse kept going out. I kept relighting it and running for cover. It finally went off and the boom shook the neighborhood so hard I didn't realize that I had glass shards stuck in my back. My friends helped pick them out, bandage me up and gave me a new shirt to replace the bloody one but I got caught anyway.

I once broke an unbreakable comb because it seemed like a challenge.

I skipped school and went to Chicago for the day in a snowstorm. Got caught.

I got expelled from the school bus for threatening the bus driver. I was probably 13. 

Did the NFL gambling ring thing in 7th grade. Rigged it of course. Got caught by school principal.

Once got sent to a psychologist because I didn't know the answer to a test question so I wrote out the lyrics to Bobby Brown's My Prerogative and the school administrators thought I was losing my mind. 

I used to steal the Indian kid's scantron form in physics and copy the answers verbatim on my form. Every week for a semester a different Indian kid's test would come up missing. Only way I passed physics. 

I bullied a kid so bad in 7th grade his family literally moved. I feel awful about it and still want to pull a Billy Madison but I don't think he would cross me off of his list.

That's just off the top of my head. 

 

 

[Sbbruin 22,142]

7 minutes ago, Baboontyme said:

I could write a journal, check that, a book. Actually, more like a novel. Honestly probably more like a Bible. 

Stole parents car nightly at 14 to pick up girls and drive to the most dangerous parts of Detroit for fun. Had copies of the keys so they were clueless. That was fun until we flooded the car by driving through...a flood. Then I did it again after getting caught, having to work off $600 damage I did to the car. Got caught again.

Originated a department store scam that bankrolled thousands of dollars in car stereo equipment.

Lit a friend's hair on fire trying to create a homemade firework of sorts with a model rocket, magnesium, and of course gasoline. Almost blew up a car in the process.

Homemade pipe bomb in a glass container with gunpowder. The fuse kept going out. I kept relighting it and running for cover. It finally went off and the boom shook the neighborhood so hard I didn't realize that I had glass shards stuck in my back. My friends helped pick them out, bandage me up and gave me a new shirt to replace the bloody one but I got caught anyway.

I once broke an unbreakable comb because it seemed like a challenge.

I skipped school and went to Chicago for the day in a snowstorm. Got caught.

I got expelled from the school bus for threatening the bus driver. I was probably 13. 

Did the NFL gambling ring thing in 7th grade. Rigged it of course. Got caught by school principal.

Once got sent to a psychologist because I didn't know the answer to a test question so I wrote out the lyrics to Bobby Brown's My Prerogative and the school administrators thought I was losing my mind. 

I used to steal the Indian kid's scantron form in physics and copy the answers verbatim on my form. Every week for a semester a different Indian kid's test would come up missing. Only way I passed physics. 

I bullied a kid so bad in 7th grade his family literally moved. I feel awful about it and still want to pull a Billy Madison but I don't think he would cross me off of his list.

That's just off the top of my head. 

 

 

You are a very bad man.

[dcbc 14,644]

On 7/13/2021 at 3:44 PM, tfoolry said:

My name is deadshank. I deal in human fulfillment. I grossed over eight thousand dollars in one night. Time of your life, huh kid?

/Thread.  Fucking epic.

[burntorangebongos 10,826]

On 8/20/2021 at 3:48 PM, Baboontyme said:

I could write a journal, check that, a book. Actually, more like a novel. Honestly probably more like a Bible. 

Stole parents car nightly at 14 to pick up girls and drive to the most dangerous parts of Detroit for fun. Had copies of the keys so they were clueless. That was fun until we flooded the car by driving through...a flood. Then I did it again after getting caught, having to work off $600 damage I did to the car. Got caught again.

Originated a department store scam that bankrolled thousands of dollars in car stereo equipment.

Lit a friend's hair on fire trying to create a homemade firework of sorts with a model rocket, magnesium, and of course gasoline. Almost blew up a car in the process.

Homemade pipe bomb in a glass container with gunpowder. The fuse kept going out. I kept relighting it and running for cover. It finally went off and the boom shook the neighborhood so hard I didn't realize that I had glass shards stuck in my back. My friends helped pick them out, bandage me up and gave me a new shirt to replace the bloody one but I got caught anyway.

I once broke an unbreakable comb because it seemed like a challenge.

I skipped school and went to Chicago for the day in a snowstorm. Got caught.

I got expelled from the school bus for threatening the bus driver. I was probably 13. 

Did the NFL gambling ring thing in 7th grade. Rigged it of course. Got caught by school principal.

Once got sent to a psychologist because I didn't know the answer to a test question so I wrote out the lyrics to Bobby Brown's My Prerogative and the school administrators thought I was losing my mind. 

I used to steal the Indian kid's scantron form in physics and copy the answers verbatim on my form. Every week for a semester a different Indian kid's test would come up missing. Only way I passed physics. 

I bullied a kid so bad in 7th grade his family literally moved. I feel awful about it and still want to pull a Billy Madison but I don't think he would cross me off of his list.

That's just off the top of my head. 

 

 

 

[GringoSalado 1,653]

I think I was 9 or 10 when I caught a Bumblebee in a jar and put it in the freezer. When it stopped moving I tied a long piece of thread around its neck, and managed to surreptitiously tied the other end to my sister's sneaker (under the table-clothed dinner table).

 

Good times.