Jump to content

Negative Recruiting Your Own School: The aggy Screenshot Megathread


texifornia

Recommended Posts

5 hours ago, TexLonghorn said:

75% of aggy would blame t.u. for tampering with the cow outside of the portal window and paying it under the table to hurt aggy.

10% will say that it's to be expected because they are young and next year is going to be their year.

8% of aggy would doxx the cow and try to ruin its life because it violated a gentlecow's agreement they had to do everything aggy wants.

5% would argue the cow was really good in the past, and would attempt to get the cow to sign a 10-year $100-million guaranteed deal to stay at aggy, not caring about how it has damaged their program.

2%, of course, wouldn't know about it or care because they aren't red-ass.

Adds up to 100%, aggy math not correct.

  • Like 1
  • Haha 2
Link to comment
Share on other sites

6 hours ago, TexLonghorn said:

75% of aggy would blame t.u. for tampering with the cow outside of the portal window and paying it under the table to hurt aggy.

10% will say that it's to be expected because they are young and next year is going to be their year.

8% of aggy would doxx the cow and try to ruin its life because it violated a gentlecow's agreement they had to do everything aggy wants.

5% would argue the cow was really good in the past, and would attempt to get the cow to sign a 10-year $100-million guaranteed deal to stay at aggy, not caring about how it has damaged their program.

2%, of course, wouldn't know about it or care because they aren't red-ass.

99% would be aroused by the cow.

  • Haha 4
Link to comment
Share on other sites

They did have a plan. They had a coach lined up that would unify the base, excite the recruits, and “got” Aggy. 
 
They just didn’t make sure that Dan Campbell would take the job first, before they fired Fisher. They assumed he would, because they believe that bullshit Bear Bryant said about “mama called” when he bailed out of A&M. (Bryant was too smart to tell the truth- “Thank God I can get out of this shithole and away from these nutty assholes”)

IMO, it was a knee jerk response once it was obvious UT was winning at least 10 games this season.

I would say Bjork should be fired for not having anything lined up to fire Jimbo that early but I doubt it was his call.

Big thanks to Texags posters for not wanting to bring in M. Stoops, and likely most of his staff, to stabilize the shit show and possibly keep the class together.
  • Hook 'Em 3
Link to comment
Share on other sites

11 hours ago, Beau Vine said:

I am 1000% sure this is one of you:

image.thumb.png.1284e40def7d290aa8f09eb1df4cbe72.png

I thought this same thing, but if so, it’s the mark of a true artist. A genius. It’s too perfect and I don’t think we have anyone coming close to that level on Surly. 

9 hours ago, UnhappilyMarried said:

Half of this is completely made up. Backup KSU QB, bailed out ISU? September wins don’t count bc the opponent wasn’t playing at full capacity, but only the opponent gets that benefit of the doubt 

Of course it’s all bullshit. Thing is, no one has won more games that they didn’t play than Texas A&M. Those goobers are undefeated in every hypothetical they’ve never played. It works the other way as well. Texas has not only lost every game it never played, but additionally, all of its actual wins can be rationalized as losses in the alternate universe that aggies claim we should be living in. I get it. It’s all they have. Fantasyland is a far better alternative than being the laughingstock of college sports that they are in reality. 

  • Hook 'Em 8
Link to comment
Share on other sites

8 hours ago, TexLonghorn said:

75% of aggy would blame t.u. for tampering with the cow outside of the portal window and paying it under the table to hurt aggy.

10% will say that it's to be expected because they are young and next year is going to be their year.

8% of aggy would doxx the cow and try to ruin its life because it violated a gentlecow's agreement they had to do everything aggy wants.

5% would argue the cow was really good in the past, and would attempt to get the cow to sign a 10-year $100-million guaranteed deal to stay at aggy, not caring about how it has damaged their program.

2%, of course, wouldn't know about it or care because they aren't red-ass.

 

  • Hook 'Em 1
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

@JesusSweatDuck is a great man.

image.png.30fae1f122c447e80aec3ff2f5d8a196.png

image.png.3d8153b691efcbe0a6dd48021d937995.png

Some flunky Tac officer (acronyms like real armymen!) makes stupid remark about the relative value of different aggies and it becomes a cherished memory to be shared 53 years later when the Ags are feeling down and derided. Advantage Aggies.

image.png.510b5a334482193168c8f22825dd3e78.png

Absolutely true if your brand stands for raising false expectations and meeting humiliating failure. Everybody reveres the Titanic and Elizabeth Holmes.

The below seemed kind of random at first:

image.png.23c5e5f13873d9536cb95a64d90ed1f5.png

Then I realize he's lashing out at the Armed Forces who sponsor the bowl. It's not random, but it's profoundly idiotic. 

image.png.e7d6e201a5aae128ce5806d9bb3d671d.png

On brand. Our losses are the best losses!

 

image.png.56d91f9f2833b02d3a3f1213060f6118.png

Also on brand. Slocum's razor. Think how everyone will laugh when they realize the simple truth delivered by Aggie Joe.

image.png.72ffdd37d6de3ffef0c66e9bd53330c7.png

 

An unfounded expectation accompanied by a delusion. Thanks, Agly.

 

 

Edited by RomaVicta
  • Hook 'Em 3
  • Like 1
  • Haha 5
Link to comment
Share on other sites

18 hours ago, ATXhorn17 said:

Man, they've reallly drilled the "Alabama was horrible in week 2 but had it figured out by week 6" narrative into their brains... Texas beating Alabama a second time to win a national title in Houston may break aggy for good.

Won't matter, because IF tu gets by an "overrated PAC 2 team" in Washington, the sips will have lucked into a matchup with either Michigan or  the only team in America that improved after week 2 (Bama).   But the Michigan/Bama winner will have been through the war of all wars just to win the semifinal and will be the walking wounded taking on a full strength tu team.    

  • Hook 'Em 4
  • Like 2
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

16 minutes ago, MIkeHoncho said:

Won't matter, because IF tu gets by an "overrated PAC 2 team" in Washington, the sips will have lucked into a matchup with either Michigan or  the only team in America that improved after week 2 (Bama).   But the Michigan/Bama winner will have been through the war of all wars just to win the semifinal and will be the walking wounded taking on a full strength tu team.    

How do you write aggy so well?

  • Like 1
  • Haha 1
Link to comment
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.



×
×
  • Create New...