Negative Recruiting Your Own School: The aggy Screenshot Megathread

[Mikey4 2,476]

This is just amazing. We've had scoreboard on them for 13 years running, and yet they have somehow dominated us on the field. 

[utee94 15,745]

Ags have only won about 1/3rd of the games they've actually played against Texas, but you can rest assured they're undefeated in games never played.

[Fletch 5,799]

4 minutes ago, Mikey4 said:

This is just amazing. We've had scoreboard on them for 13 years running, and yet they have somehow dominated us on the field. 

Ah. 2-3 years now? Not next year? 
 

My aggy friend thinks they’re going to be a top 5 team by years end. I just texted back “yeah well we’ll see….” Wasn’t in the mood for aggy mental gymnastics. 

[RomaVicta 29,775]

On 4/27/2024 at 7:11 PM, Elmer_Fudd said:

Narrator: It never sinks in.

[Hank_Hill 18,486]

2 hours ago, Mikey4 said:

This is just amazing. We've had scoreboard on them for 13 years running, and yet they have somehow dominated us on the field. 

I think there were maybe 3 seasons since they joined that I would have been genuinely concerned to play them. They haven’t dominated shit.

[SeattleHorn 117]

What are the odds that after Texas puts up a good record in 2024 we start hearing the phrase "Old SEC" to refer to that mythically glorious period between 2012 and 2023?

[deft 6,797]

Narrator: It never sinks in.

Because the jimbo years were the aberration you see. Totally different than the aggy norm.

[Born Burnt 6,147]

11 minutes ago, SeattleHorn said:

What are the odds that after Texas puts up a good record in 2024 we start hearing the phrase "Old SEC" to refer to that mythically glorious period between 2012 and 2023?

[Hornlover 8,824]

19 minutes ago, SeattleHorn said:

What are the odds that after Texas puts up a good record in 2024 we start hearing the phrase "Old SEC" to refer to that mythically glorious period between 2012 and 2023?

Well, obviously a 14 team SEC is much stronger than the watered-down 16-team SEC with Texas & OU.

[texifornia 56,489]

 

[deft 6,797]

Perhaps a good reminder that this thread should be for aggy posts and responses. I’m just as guilty as any.

[campcrunk 2,346]

37 minutes ago, texifornia said:

 

Who in the holy fuck thought that this would EVER be a good idea? It sends SO many wrong messages and reeks of John Sharp. It's worse than their initial SEC commercial. Just atrocious and atrociously designed. God damn, those fuckers need to get a life, starting with a real identity of their own. I mean, it's their only hope of ever accompliishing anything of note not involving "inventing" maroon vegetables (that began their existance as maroon until we selectively bred them to be orange because orange will ALWAYS be more marketable than maroon, anyway)

So of course, it will never happen. I'll bet they just claim credit for "inventing" maroon beets or something. 

[Pato del Muerto 52,340]

1 hour ago, campcrunk said:

Who in the holy fuck thought that this would EVER be a good idea? It sends SO many wrong messages and reeks of John Sharp. It's worse than their initial SEC commercial. Just atrocious and atrociously designed. God damn, those fuckers need to get a life, starting with a real identity of their own. I mean, it's their only hope of ever accompliishing anything of note not involving "inventing" maroon vegetables (that began their existance as maroon until we selectively bred them to be orange because orange will ALWAYS be more marketable than maroon, anyway)

So of course, it will never happen. I'll bet they just claim credit for "inventing" maroon beets or something. 

I think that’s a private mascot from one of their clothing stores, like Aggie Outfitters or similar. 

[Tex Pete 20,168]

His name is “Little Brother.” 

[EastTexan 662]

 When did aggy post a 13-0 record?

[TKthunder2 4,980]

1 minute ago, EastTexan said:

 When did aggy post a 13-0 record?

You don’t know enough of the aggy bullshit lore and fairytales.

[EastTexan 662]

6 minutes ago, TKthunder2 said:

You don’t know enough of the aggy bullshit lore and fairytales.

Oh I know their bull shit. 

[Xminus6 790]

32 minutes ago, EastTexan said:

 When did aggy post a 13-0 record?

Not their record. It’s the score of a game they win against us and, allegedly, branded into our mascot. They claimed it’s named Bevo because we modified the 13 - 0 to read BEVO. 

Edited April 30 by Xminus6

[Tex Pete 20,168]

31 minutes ago, EastTexan said:

 When did aggy post a 13-0 record?

That's their record against us in games we haven't played since 2011, plus this year.

 

[TKthunder2 4,980]

21 minutes ago, EastTexan said:

Oh I know their bull shit. 

“One popular theory is that Cadets from Texas A&M stole the mascot to brand 13 – 0, which was the score the Aggies had won by the year before. Faced with that dilemma some UT student suggested combining the 1 and 3 to create a B, made an E out of the -, added a V, kept the 0 to create BEVO.”

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bevo_(mascot)

[Tex Pete 20,168]

3 hours ago, Tex Pete said:

His name is “Little Brother.” 

[AP101S 1,480]

27 minutes ago, TKthunder2 said:

“One popular theory is that Cadets from Texas A&M stole the mascot to brand 13 – 0, which was the score the Aggies had won by the year before. Faced with that dilemma some UT student suggested combining the 1 and 3 to create a B, made an E out of the -, added a V, kept the 0 to create BEVO.”

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bevo_(mascot)

https://www.texasexes.org/about-us/history-and-traditions/truth-about-bevo

tl;dr - The mascot was named Bevo before the 13 - 0 branding. The brand was never changed from 13 - 0 to BEVO. Texas A&M did not steal the mascot.

[Sgt Hulk 13,644]

A tale as old as time 

[TKthunder2 4,980]

4 minutes ago, AP101S said:

https://www.texasexes.org/about-us/history-and-traditions/truth-about-bevo

tl;dr - The mascot was named Bevo before the 13 - 0 branding. The brand was never changed from 13 - 0 to BEVO. Texas A&M did not steal the mascot.

Yes we know it’s literally in the wiki article I posted (I didn’t quote the whole thing) it’s also why I said this…

1 hour ago, TKthunder2 said:

You don’t know enough of the aggy bullshit lore and fairytales.

Just was explaining why aggy put 13-0 on the dumb mascot.

[Tex Pete 20,168]

24 minutes ago, Tex Pete said:

Sorry. Not enough SEC.

[Chooky 13,302]

"Nah, I can't make it tonight.  I have to write 'redass' on these pants."

[RomaVicta 29,775]

3 hours ago, Tex Pete said:

Sorry. Not enough SEC.

Everytime I see this, I see how pathetic Aggies are. Does any other school anywhere or even a hometown curio shop have an opponent's mascot in full costume? It's unthinkable anywhere else because no other rivals have a party that has declared jihad and is identified by that jihad.

You might think that we created the mascot below as satire:

But no, they created that idiotic thing, too.

[TheAuditor 1,031]

11 minutes ago, RomaVicta said:

Everytime I see this, I see how pathetic Aggies are. Does any other school anywhere or even a hometown curio shop have an opponent's mascot in full costume? It's unthinkable anywhere else because no other rivals have a party that has declared jihad and is identified by that jihad.

You might think that we created the mascot below as satire:

But no, they created that idiotic thing, too.

He should apply here:

 

[T-shirt Sip 2,097]

21 minutes ago, RomaVicta said:

Everytime I see this, I see how pathetic Aggies are. Does any other school anywhere or even a hometown curio shop have an opponent's mascot in full costume? It's unthinkable anywhere else because no other rivals have a party that has declared jihad and is identified by that jihad.

You might think that we created the mascot below as satire:

But no, they created that idiotic thing, too.

[satyanash 14,281]

On 4/27/2024 at 12:21 PM, Jimmy Two Times said:

Average Aggie Saturday morning: wake up still shaking with rage because biased NFL GMs are ignoring whorns players' BDF film and drafting them in early rounds. Turn on the computer, log on to TexAgs and write a 7 paragraph essay about how the sips cheated their way to recruiting stud players, but also those players suck and weren't developed, except the ones that were developed and if they were developed, it took too long. 

A Day in the Life of The A&M Cultist

10:49 AM - Wake up to the sound of voicemail and the caller laughing, "I'm not sure what a 'sip' is and why you don't want us to draft a single one, but I did want to say that we've decided to hire another candidate for our scouting department. You are very...umm..enthusiastic. Good luck!" As the caller hangs up, you hear others in the background giggling. Your eyes squint and your lip curls. ********! Clearly whorns fans! No wonder they smiled at each other when you showed up to the Panthers' front offices in a #12 jersey and blazer.

10:56 AM - It occurs to you that The Elkinator would be an excellent nickname for Coach Elko. Scramble for mom's iPad and custom maroon Apple pencil to write it down. Can't find blank page as Notes doc is filled with Reveille essays, heart symbols, the phrase ELKO 4EVER and the adjectives GUTTY, DETERMINED, HEADY and WINNER written over and over. Reread essay entitled "What Elko has taught me about love" and reflect on its final line...."Wherever puppies lick jowls, wherever maroon bluebonnets grow on windy dales, wherever people will help a stranger......The Elk will be there."

11:02 AM - Morning weeping is finished. Touch Elko poster over bed and light candle while assuming a meditation position. You mumble a silent prayer and beg God to end his testing of Elko and Conner Weigman. And for Quinn Ewers to have a serious industrial accident involving pipe fittings.

11:59 AM - Log on to SECrant. Weave through ******** analysis and threads about the spring game. Analysis, facts, analysis, ********....it all makes your head hurt. Decide anti-tu, pro-Texas Fightin' Aggies post is needed and write the following:

sip u's offense is joking! Joke! Joke! Look no farther than Quinn Ewers who is logging into recaveers and threw more than five intercepts last year. I guess it is because they know they can not beat us.... Other things:

Jimbo was a HORRIBLE coach. Hello!? Coach or whatever.

sip u's WR's did not catch the ball because Ewers throws to hard and it hurts them! I know this because kids used to hum balls at me when I'd loiter to close to the football players in high school wanting to decorate their lockers.

Weigman's posture against maroon was amazing. I was screaming,"Conner! Conner!" hysterically all game and when he came in his karisma (korisma?) was amazing. He surveyed the field like General Charles De Gaulle or someone.

Hello!?!? Anyone else notice that Bisonits is a guard now? I called this two years ago.

Anthill. Not SEC good. He has been embbarasing comapred to Taurean York (which I also pointed out) and is small and slow. I mean, please.

2:56 PM - Log back on to post and gauge responses. There are three Aggies and Sooners agreeing with you calling Texas "sip U". This is hilarious to you! You roll on the ground laughing. Two Aggies with extremely exuberant posting names (OlSarge & HarvardOfTheBrazos) agree with you. Several Alabama and Georgia fans are calling you a dumbass. This hurts you. How could someone attack a fellow SECer? Aren't we all in the same conference? These are the kind of people who talk about "championships" and "nattys" when we should all be concentrating on beating tu!

1:43 PM - Go to Northgate to distribute Elko Literature. Ask people, "Have you heard the Good News of Elko?" Most people walk quickly away, but a handful of people stay and listen. The people that stay reek of weed and take your Apple watch after choking you for a while.

2:08 PM - Email the South African town of Orania and inquire as to the feasibility of purchasing land for a settlement for good ol' Ags. Oranian officials have thus far ignored requests. Consider coloring in South Africa on world map in orange denoting a whorns controlled sphere of influence.

3:39 PM - Watch Weigman highlights. '22 LSU. Again and again. Watch tu spring game to see if you can actually see where Sark slips a $100 bill into Arch Manning's palm during a handshake at halftime. 13 0 Branding Iron told you this on private messages.

4:05 PM - Log back onto SECrant. **** all over several threads which are trying to discuss the SEC preseason favorites, the NFL draft or transfer portal.

4:59 PM - Tell MidJourney AI to generate an image of Elko with Chris Hemsworth's body from Thor. Feel all funny inside. Walk into bathroom with jar of Miracle Whip.

7:26 PM - Emerge from bathroom whistling and sweating.

8:42 PM - DM British consulate on Twitter asking that Taurean York be knighted. Receive immediate reply! It asks if Taurean belongs to a recognized line of descent of the House of York and what his ancestor's royal title was. Reply back telling the Limeys to go f**k themselves. Add Britain to tu sphere of influence on world map.

9:07 PM - More sobbing.

9:28 PM - Sobbing, but now also muttering. Now in fetal position.

9:48 PM - Listen to Alan Jackson song "It Must Be Love" over and over on Spotify. God, that's exactly what it's like. Alan Jackson is so wise.

10:27 PM - Watch First Take on ESiPN. No mention of Elko. What a joke!

10:45PM - Watch Lifetime channel movie A Confederate and a Good Ag: The True Story of Sul Ross.

Inspired, you begin work on a script for the Mike Elko story. Begins with opening scene of Sark selling his soul to Lucifer while Elko leads the Aggies to the 2025 National Championship. Script ends with Elko walking into your parents' basement, picking you up in your overalls and senior boots and carrying you out while Quinn Ewers claps and says, "Way to go Mikey.....way to go."

Email completed script addressed to Who It May Concern to Universal Studios in Hollywood.

1:43 AM - Start making list of how Taylor Swift and the liberal-controlled deep state have wronged you.

1:58 AM - Go to bed. Place maroon leather A&M cowboy hat on head while avoiding dental halo. Rustle legs under blankets causing static sparks and pretend that you have superpowers.

Sleep - Dream of Elko. Always.

(h/t to Scipio Tex)

Edited April 30 by satyanash

[RomaVicta 29,775]

[SimkinsMan 4,348]

Some real talk on TexAgs today ...

But the yell leaders need to lead more yells ...

And some horse laugh fans

[SimkinsMan 4,348]

11 minutes ago, RomaVicta said:

I think this is what he was actually wearing. Maroon blazer. Check. Many regrets. Check.

[RomaVicta 29,775]

Whose side are you on, man?

[Carl Spackler 3,461]

1 hour ago, SimkinsMan said:

I think this is what he was actually wearing. Maroon blazer. Check. Many regrets. Check.

He looks drunk.  Can't blame him.

[closetojumping 62,219]

2 hours ago, SimkinsMan said:

I think this is what he was actually wearing. Maroon blazer. Check. Many regrets. Check.

Holy shit. That looks like someone at the end of their rope. 

[crash_davis 23,083]

Shrek!

[T-shirt Sip 2,097]

2 hours ago, SimkinsMan said:

I think this is what he was actually wearing. Maroon blazer. Check. Many regrets. Check.

[Pato del Muerto 52,340]

3 hours ago, RomaVicta said:

When you wear the kind of glasses that Olin wears, everything appears maroon. 

[Tex Pete 20,168]

40 minutes ago, closetojumping said:

Holy shit. That looks like someone at the end of their rope. 

[El Compadre 766]

3 minutes ago, Tex Pete said:

Elko at midnight yell

[nnm 36,063]

3 hours ago, SimkinsMan said:

I think this is what he was actually wearing. Maroon blazer. Check. Many regrets. Check.

You misspelled maroon muumuu. 

[RomaVicta 29,775]

36 minutes ago, Pato del Muerto said:

When you wear the kind of glasses that Olin wears, everything appears maroon. 

[JesusSweatDuck 17,780]

 

Don't schedule FCS schools and people might respect your schedule a little bit more.

[RomaVicta 29,775]

Faxinating.

Uh...

Bottom feeders, I tell you! That guy has no creditability! I went to college!

Of course, the Aggies fall under "other than bottom feeders."

 

Stop sucking, dumbass. Yes, when you're so sorry that you are barely ranked or not ranked, a lot of the teams you face will be ranked higher than you. You will no doubt struggle more with your schedule than we will with ours. Miss State, Michigan State, and Arizona State all feel your pain.

Edited May 1 by RomaVicta

[Plorant 798]

1 hour ago, JesusSweatDuck said:

 

Don't schedule FCS schools and people might respect your schedule a little bit more.

Of course that guy doesn't mention that we play Michigan in Ann Arbor.  Michigan.  The team that just won the national championship.  

[Hank Chinaski 6,310]

If the author’s methodology (which I haven’t taken the time to try to understand) concludes something that is different than my completely biased preconceived expectation, then they lose all credibility! 

[CashMcCoy 3,199]

24 minutes ago, Plorant said:

Of course that guy doesn't mention that we play Michigan in Ann Arbor.  Michigan.  The team that just won the national championship.  

“Of course they get a Michigan team that lost 35 starters.”

[BigHornedLurker 1,894]

On 4/30/2024 at 10:31 AM, Tex Pete said:

That's their record against us in games we haven't played since 2011, plus this year.

 

coincidently enough this math checks out 

[irishtexan 11,445]

13 minutes ago, Hank Chinaski said:

If the author’s methodology (which I haven’t taken the time to try to understand) concludes something that is different than my completely biased preconceived expectation, then they lose all credibility! 

ahem..... "creditablity" my good sir.