Jimbo 2019: The Only Tail Getting Busted is Candi's

[Elmer_Fudd 22216]

Tarp posted a piece saying Devin Morris is moving from Corner to Safety.  I guess they are going to roll with a group of Corners that include Oliver, Renfro, Myles Jones, Fuller, and Rony Elam?  Yikes.

[NorLa Horns 1458]

8 hours ago, mr. sunshine said:

Even Daniel Day Lewis couldn’t act like an aggy who had been there before 

It would be a period piece tho. So he would be the best candidate ro at least try the part

[HtownHorn 14678]

2 hours ago, Elmer_Fudd said:

Tarp posted a piece saying Devin Morris is moving from Corner to Safety.  I guess they are going to roll with a group of Corners that include Oliver, Renfro, Myles Jones, Fuller, and Rony Elam?  Yikes.

The only QB in college football that couldn't succeed against that level of incompetence is Kellen Mond.

[Machinator 32099]

If there were a power ranking for the delusional posters on their 247 board, gunner03 would be near the top.

[Machinator 32099]

More gunner03:

 

Edited June 20, 2018 by Machinator

[satyanash 14484]

Are we sure gunner03 isn't mfeldstein reincarnated?

[SydneyCarton 48092]

6 minutes ago, satyanash said:

Are we sure gunner03 isn't mfeldstein reincarnated?

I thought he was you when you let your hair down and got a couple of wine coolers in you. 

[Bodacious Bevo 3584]

Holy shit I can't even

[Radical Larry 28589]

That’s gunner. He’s in my class. I heard he’s retarded or something.

[Tex Pete 20351]

On 6/19/2018 at 7:12 AM, Hank_Hill said:

Brewster is Vic?

Not sure who that woman is, but that’s a weird place for Hornsby to have his hand for a football pic. 

Edited June 20, 2018 by Tex Pete

[Tex Pete 20351]

On 6/19/2018 at 11:52 PM, Yama Yak Yachtzi said:

"Act like you've been there before." 

 

lulz

They have been there before. It landed them on probation under Jackie Sherrill and RC Scrotum. It also landed them near the top of the heap of  most sanctioned NCAA football teams. 

[Tex Pete 20351]

On 6/19/2018 at 4:40 PM, Orange^White said:

The first thing the staff did when they arrived was promise a 1-2 ranked class and they can't deliver it. So sure, go ahead and trust them.

They’ll be #1 according to Billy Loochi’s rankings, ya stupid sip! Just watch. 

[closetojumping 62696]

1 hour ago, Machinator said:

If there were a power ranking for the delusional posters on their 247 board, gunner03 would be near the top.

 

  Hide contents

 

 

 

1 hour ago, Machinator said:

More gunner03:

  Hide contents

 

1 hour ago, satyanash said:

Are we sure gunner03 isn't mfeldstein reincarnated?

 

1 hour ago, SydneyCarton said:

I thought he was you when you let your hair down and got a couple of wine coolers in you. 

This sequence of posts just caused me to lose my shit at my desk. Holy shit. First the gunner stuff and then the follow-on from Sydney. Just outstanding. 

I don't go over to the aggie boards much, but seeing these takes from some of those guys feels like it must read like some sort of ClockworkOrange fever dream for CFB fans type shit.

[Neonmoon 38129]

I assumed Gunner was someone’s sock 

[Hagbard Celine 10859]

21 hours ago, Neonmoon said:

Aggy has already determined most will get bumped to a 4 Star 

.... by paying the right people at espn and 247 to quietly bump one of them every 3 weeks over the fall when they have a good friday night.  there is no budget, and the discount window is OPEN FOR BUSINESS.

[Hagbard Celine 10859]

11 hours ago, Casual Encounter said:

They’re paying the recruiting services too? Next thing you know the playoff committee will be voting them in at 7-5.

Ferengi Rule of Acquistion number TWELVE (12)::

"Anything worth selling is worth selling twice"

 

[Hagbard Celine 10859]

baggins DICTATES at FIVE-X the RECRUITING POWER.

WORLD FUCKING WIDE you bitchass sips.

DICKTATES!

[KYHorn 17046]

2 hours ago, Machinator said:

If there were a power ranking for the delusional posters on their 247 board, gunner03 would be near the top.

 

  Hide contents

 

 

So we know who daddy98 really is, which to me was a bit surprising, but what do y'all think gunner is like? I probably don't read enough of his work to make an informed-enough guess.

[NorLa Horns 1458]

4 minutes ago, KYHorn said:

So we know who daddy98 really is, which to me was a bit surprising, but what do y'all think gunner is like? I probably don't read enough of his work to make an informed-enough guess.

Remeber that scene in "Seven" when they found the killers journals? 

Something kinda like that im thinking. 

[lemonandaturd 4285]

7 minutes ago, KYHorn said:

So we know who daddy98 really is, which to me was a bit surprising, but what do y'all think gunner is like? I probably don't read enough of his work to make an informed-enough guess.

Gunner is probably that shit tweeting Kountze aggy with the funny name.  

[Bodacious Bevo 3584]

3 hours ago, Machinator said:

If there were a power ranking for the delusional posters on their 247 board, gunner03 would be near the top.

 

  Reveal hidden contents

 

 

I still can't even but I'm starting to recover. That was the aggy-est of all aggy takes and we're all feeling the collateral damage. 

Edited June 21, 2018 by Bodacious Bevo

[Sejjr 3246]

The best part is that moron posts on there like he has some inside information, and they actually treat him like he does. And I always love when these dipshits talk about "watching film." 

Edited June 21, 2018 by Sejjr

[horn_of_the_morning 978]

We have enough data points to at least form a hypothesis if not reach a conclusion.

 

Storng's bad hires or Herman's other good hires have no bearing on that.

 

 

 

 

 

 

[HtownHorn 14678]

gunner has been taking swallows from the jizz jar again.

[Machinator 32099]

Now the Sumlin recruiting comparisons:

[Bevo14 8311]

Nobody faps to spring recruiting championships like aggy. They could finish outside the top 25 on NSD and they'd still be bragging about their class ranking the previous June.

Edited June 21, 2018 by Bevo14

[HtownHorn 14678]

52 minutes ago, Machinator said:

Now the Sumlin recruiting comparisons:

 

  Reveal hidden contents

 

 

What is especially funny is that the worst coaches on their staff are at DL and OL, while only Price is a decent recruiter. Hell there wunderkind DL coach they brought in left after less than a week.

[Chopper 17234]

2 hours ago, HtownHorn said:

gunner has been taking swallows from the jizz jar again.

If my premonition was correct, this is gunner

[HoustonHorn 1062]

If my premonition was correct, this is gunner

You realize gunner is a typical 45 y.o. ag living the dream in [suburban], Houston, right? He has a house with a yard and a fence and eats at Chili's and Olive Garden.

[Gardner Barnes 1562]

You realize gunner is a typical 45 y.o. ag living the dream in [suburban], Houston, right? He has a house with a yard and a fence and eats at Chili's and Olive Garden.

 

This is more likely than any other scenario. God what a depressing life. I strongly fear ever falling into a suburban mediocrity like the aggy lifestyle.

 

I saw a ton of this when we lived in a cookie cutter neighborhood out near Bee Caves. 3/4 of the people on my street were aggy. Nice people but holy shit I felt like I was settling.

 

[Beef 128]

6 hours ago, HoustonHorn said:

8 hours ago, Chopper said:

If my premonition was correct, this is gunner

You realize gunner is a typical 45 y.o. ag living the dream in [suburban], Houston, right? He has a house with a yard and a fence and eats at Chili's and Olive Garden.

Don't forget, he has a used Skeeter bass boat and a Maroon pickup. 

[Machinator 32099]

[Leanderman 2275]

I like the way he says we have "more money".

[Dbeasy 15049]

Jesus these people are unbelievably delusional.

[Bevo14 8311]

7 minutes ago, Leanderman said:

I like the way he says we have "more money".

They're rolling in dough

 

[Neonmoon 38129]

more prestigious university?

Are we using Lucci's rankings?

[SydneyCarton 48092]

2 minutes ago, Neonmoon said:

more prestigious university?

Are we using Lucci's rankings?

If by "we," you mean "those idiotic, mouth-breathing waterheads and collective bag of dipshits," then the answer is "Yes." Why yes, they are using Liucci's rankings. 

[TBGFL 397]

More prestigious university?? That's fucking hilarious 

[Hornius Emeritus 12460]

Olin Buchanan fanning the flames of Aggie delusion:

https://texags.com/s/28601/no-need-to-pump-the-brakes-fishers-recruiting-prowess-is-the-real-deal/5

[Orange&White 5527]

6 minutes ago, Hornius Emeritus said:

Olin Buchanan fanning the flames of Aggie delusion:

https://texags.com/s/28601/no-need-to-pump-the-brakes-fishers-recruiting-prowess-is-the-real-deal/5

So, Olin, would you say that Jimbo's recruiting prowess is "on the precipice of greatness"?

[Scholz 11943]

15 hours ago, Neonmoon said:

I assumed Gunner was someone’s sock 

That's what makes aggy so vulnerable to trolling.  You really can never tell who's a sock and who's a regular run of the mill aggy moron.

[BoomMF 1399]

That article was better when he titled it "no need to pump the breaks..." before he corrected it. Much more accurately aggy.

 

 

[Lobwedgephil 1139]

Aggy didn't cheat, just got screwed by OU. 

 

Spoiler

Memories came flooding back as R.C. Slocum listened to a Greg Hill interview on TexAgs Radio a few weeks ago.

Anger did, too.

The winningest coach in Aggie football history, Slocum is irked that some see Hill as rule-breaking prima donna who got Texas A&M put on probation in 1994. And Slocum is still miffed that an NCAA Infractions Committee headed by David Boren, who would soon be named president of OU, put A&M on probation at all.

As Slocum delicately put it in his Orange, Texas, drawl: “That was the biggest screwing a school ever got.”

That became more than apparent 12 years later when Oklahoma received a slap on the wrist for a similar, yet more egregious infraction. More on that later.

First, understand the way things worked in college athletics 25 years ago. Today, athletes receive “full cost of attendance,” which covers an entire year of tuition, fees, room and board and includes a stipend of approximately $5,000 annually. That wasn’t the case before 2016.

So in those days, football players didn’t typically stay on campus during the summer. Instead, the athletic department helped arrange for them to land summer jobs that provided athletes a chance to earn and save money for the upcoming school year.

“During that time it was traditional for college kids to work summer jobs,” Slocum said. “I worked one summer in a shipyard. I worked in a chemical plant and at a Conoco refinery. That was a big part of my education. I learned how hard some of those jobs were and how little I got paid."

In the summer of 1992, Hill, a star running back who would become a first-round NFL draft pick, was among several A&M players who got a job working on Housing and Urban Development (HUD) projects in the Dallas area. They were summer help for a full-time staff that did “make readies” — replacing carpet, painting, cleaning, etc. — on HUD apartment units.

An audit found that from 1990-92 many employees were paid for hours when they were not actually at work. That included, but was not limited to, Hill and some other A&M athletes.

“They were doing what everyone else was doing,” Slocum said. “They were summer employees and doing what the full-time employees were doing. Sometimes they left early. Well, everybody else was leaving early. Sometimes after lunch they didn’t have anything to do, and the regular workers would say, 'Just show up (tomorrow) morning.'”

Slocum said the problem was more with the lax management on the South Dallas project than with the workers. A responsible manager could have docked their pay or fired them.

In fact, Slocum said another player was dismissed at his urging. A prize recruit who was on his way to becoming All-American was working that summer on a similar HUD project in Garland. Actually, “working” might not be an accurate verb.

That player was employed under a more diligent manager than Hill was, and the boss phoned Slocum to report that his player's on-the-job effort wasn’t satisfactory. Slocum recommended the player be fired. He was.

Slocum feels that proves A&M wasn’t conspiring to pay players for nothing. If one highly valued player wasn’t paid for unperformed work, why would Hill and some of the other, more marginal players be treated differently?

True, A&M had committed NCAA violations in the past. But after becoming head coach in 1989, Slocum was determined to run a compliant program.

Slocum had a private polygraph company administer tests to him, recruiting coordinator Tim Cassidy and other staff members to prove they were not involved in any schemes to fraudulently pay players. Hill and the other players involved also took the polygraph test.

“The first thing I did was call each of those players individually,” Slocum said. “I told them, 'I can deal with it if you made a mistake, but I can’t deal with it if you told me a bold-faced lie. If you lie to me, you can’t be on this football team.'

“When I went to Greg Hill’s house, his mother and grandmother were there. They said, ‘Gregory, you better tell coach the truth.' They all fessed up except for one.”

Actually, one was released from the team — defensive back Percy Singleton. Slocum suspended Hill for the first five games of the 1993 season.

That wasn’t good enough for the NCAA or Boren, then an Oklahoma senator. A&M was advised an investigation would continue.

Then on Sept. 10, 1993 — the Friday before A&M faced Boren’s Oklahoma Sooners in Norman — the NCAA Infractions Committee announced A&M would face greater sanctions. The Aggies lost to OU, 44-14, the next day.

Those sanctions rankled Slocum. He was also upset by the timing of the announcement. At that point A&M had won consecutive Southwest Conference championships and dozens of recruiting battles against OU. The Aggies were also ranked fifth in the nation.

Could it be that Boren strategically waited until the eve of the A&M-OU game to make that announcement in hopes that it might be a distraction for the Aggies and give the Sooners an edge? Slocum thinks so.

“They hung us out to dry,” Slocum said. “If they had any integrity, that would at least have waited until Monday. That kind of indicates the vindictiveness at that time. Obviously, when I was coaching I couldn’t say anything about it.”

Just days after A&M completed a 10-2 season, the NCAA placed Texas A&M on five years probation and barred the 1994 Aggies from appearing on television or in a bowl game and from competing for the Southwest Conference championship.

The next season, A&M blasted Oklahoma, 36-14, en route to an undefeated 10-0-1 campaign. With A&M ineligible, five teams — Baylor, Rice, Texas, TCU and Texas Tech — shared the SWC championship with 4-3 conference records.

“That’s a championship our team won but didn’t get credit for,” Slocum said. “We won on the field with none of the players that were involved (in the controversy)."

The NCAA cited a “lack of institutional control” as a factor in A&M’s harsh punishment. Slocum still says that charge was bogus. He said he and compliance director Tedi Zalesky were doing everything they could to run a clean program. He even felt like they were a model of compliance.

“We were so conscientious about what we were doing,” he said. “We were the cutting edge of what was being done for compliance. But they (the infractions committee) said we should have gone on the road and monitored those jobs. That’s stupid. We had players on jobs all over the country. If you showed up one day, somebody might not be there the next day.”

Even Boren would have to admit Slocum had a point.

In 2006, during Boren's tenure as OU President, Sooners quarterback Rhett Bomar and guard J.D. Quinn were found to be paid for work not performed at an Oklahoma City car dealership. Bomar received as much as $18,000 despite only working five hours a week.

Bomar and Quinn were dismissed from the team, but the Oklahoma program received almost no punishment. Oklahoma had to “vacate” its 2005 season and lost two scholarships in 2009 and 2010. Unlike A&M, Oklahoma was still allowed to compete for championship. The Sooners won the Big 12 championship the following season.

Slocum denied the inconsistencies in NCAA sanctions motivated him to speak out. He maintains he’s merely responding to those who ignorantly and unfairly criticize Hill.

“Greg Hill was a good guy, a good man who paid his dues,” Slocum said. “I can’t say what he did was right. He’d be the first to say he made a mistake in judgment. But he was just doing what the other workers were doing.”

However, Slocum also couldn’t deny some bitterness remains.

“I’m going to my grave saying we took a royal screwing,” he said.

 

 

 

[Scholz 11943]

“I’m going to my grave saying we took a royal screwing,” he said.

That's because you're a cheater and a liar, Arrrceee.

[Cairn Horn88 8262]

2 hours ago, Dbeasy said:

Jesus these people are unbelievably delusional.

That’s why they will always be mid-tier, middle of the pack, .500 players.  Delusion always makes you think you are great, when in essence, you are no where near being all that good.  They will have decent seasons, but really, they suck .

[Leanderman 2275]

“I’m going to my grave saying we took a royal screwing,” he said.

When has a gomer ever complained about having butt sex before? Talk about sour grapes.

[Johnny Sack 8397]

57 minutes ago, Scholz said:

“I’m going to my grave saying we took a royal screwing,” he said.

That's because you're a cheater and a liar, Arrrceee.

More or less than the royal screwing you were given your mistress secretary at aggy?

[Pato del Muerto 52494]

3 hours ago, Machinator said:

Which one of you is this?

[closetojumping 62696]

 

I was at a lunch bunch in Houston right after college and Jerry Scarborough was there talking. I found him useless in the age of the Internet as a recruiting guy, but he was always Mack’s mouthpiece, so there were nuggets in the crap to pull out sometimes. Anyway, someone asked something about ATM and he went on this long diatribe about RC Slocum, who was the HC at the time, being Sherrill’s bagman and what a piece of trash he was offline. It was entertaining and enlightening. JS did not care at all for him, and neither did any of the older donors in the room. At a personal level. So yeah, fuck that revisionist history writing piece of shit and every aggie shrugging off cheating along with him. 

[Player 4575]

2 hours ago, Hornius Emeritus said:

Olin Buchanan fanning the flames of Aggie delusion:

https://texags.com/s/28601/no-need-to-pump-the-brakes-fishers-recruiting-prowess-is-the-real-deal/5

Quote

You’re racing down the highway, you're driving at least 20 MPH over the speed limit. The odometer is spinning like a slot machine. There’s not a state trooper in sight. Then, for some unspecific reason you get a nagging feeling that this trip is going too well. Suddenly, you’re compelled to ease off the gas and slow down.

Ever have that feeling?

That analogy will go way over their heads. Olin should have gone with:

"You're sitting in the Rose Bowl, you're up by 28 points at halftime. The corps is humping it like it's shearing time. There's not a sip in sight. Then, for some unspecific reason you get a nagging feeling that this game is going too well. Suddenly, you're compelled to ease off the jizz jar and put down the pimp cane. 

Ever have that feeling?"